I was listening to my ipod and while reading i was listening to this song:

and then this song came on:

I keep trying to share with the world about what i learned about love... and I keep hitting roadblock after roadblock after roadblock after roadblock after roadblock after roadblock... cause I didn't want it to cost you any money... because it really shouldn't cost the world any money to learn what love really is... because in my first blog post, I said that i had nothing and now I have everything I love. And i'm not a millionaire or anything... as a matter of fact... I don't have any money at all and i'm just about ready to starve... but i keep trying to get it done and tell you my story... because it's so amazing... I don't have anything left to give the world except my love and no matter what i keep trying I can't share it with you and I keep asking why.... because I love the world enough to try and do my best and this time no matter what I keep trying to do to tell you my amazing story something get's in my way. I can't help but cry and keep crying because the world isn't loving me back... but none of you have any idea everything I had done and tried to make it as amazing as it could be... and I don't want to be that person that just sits in front of a camera I want to be the best i can be but everything cost so much fucking money... and it makes me so sad that's all the world cares about is money... and i keep trying to share my love with all of you my own way... but everyone wants my money... my whole life I've lived through incredible emotional pain... and I finally found out what love is and no matter how hard i keep trying to share you how i did it no matter how absurd the story might seem... because the very thing that everyone wants in life is to feel loved and we're all so busy going after money it's killing me inside cause the very skills I need to do this the world denied me... and would you actually believe that you don't need big cars or wealth or fame or anything like that we just need each other... but no all you want is my money money money money and i'm just trying to be me cause I finally know whom I am you deserve to know whom you really are what ever that may be to you... and i asked for help as well and i did get some of it but i also didn't get it from some and what I requested didn't cost any money at all... and I can't stand the fact that i installed bank machines for a living and loved that job... and when you know that you selflessly used your gift to get the company doing better... i can't help but keep crying because I'm the one that's out of a job and dont' have any money... and then because i don't have any money.... the bank takes more from me by charging me 47 dollars because i can't make the payment for my truck that my deceased dad's love and money allowed me to finance it... and I just can't keep feeling like there isn't love out there any more I know there is... but why do you have to have my money at every single nook and cranny of the universe when all I want to do is be myself and share my love with the world instead of lying and cheating and stealing all the time... but no there's there's so much lying and cheating and stealing out there to both other people and to themselves and the one thing i have that could make me millions I can't because of forum rules and what would be percieved as begging and can't believe the world is denying me the very thing i believe i rightfully deserve which i was hoping to gather all the bronies of the world with it so I can be with the most loving people in the world and it wouldn't have to cost them and me any money... and for once in my whole entire life I can't do anything except here and cry because I finally caved in and tried to pirate software only to be crippled by a virus that preventing me from listening to the music on my computer, that i built with my own love and money i rightfully earned... so now i have to deal with the lack of love becuase that too is now going to prevent me from sharing with all the bronies of the world my love... and I can't stop crying because love is all I have left to give and it feels like the world just doesn't want it... so for once in my whole life i finally feel like giving up because I spent so much money trying to share it with you all.... and when I tell you that I feel pain you no one cares to comment but if someone's eating waffles he get's all the attention and I can't help but cry even more because the very thing I've already tried sharing no one reads because they're too lazy or intimidated but no, someones short little blurb about nothing will get hundreds of views... so if there's anyone that should be losing faith it's me... I don't want the money I just wanted your love...

 I don't want the money I just wanted your love...

You know, TwlightCircuits, I don't just sympathize with your situation, I admire you, because despite all of these terrible problems, and your message being rejected again and again, you still hold onto your belief in love. Over the years situations like yours have made me somewhat bitter and cynical, yet you have held on to your idealism. You are a very strong person. Furthermore, I have read your posts about your beliefs in love and such, and I think they're brilliant. You deserve far more than you have, and it is truly tragic. Do not lose faith in your ideals, and I wish you the best of luck with everything,

Yeah something in your poem triggered a combination of things that were making me sad and boom I got all emotional about it. Didn't lie about any of it though.
   It's actually kinda funny because I had someone ask me the other day if was done my shopping and I had to say that for once in a long time i don't have any money to get things for my family. She wasn't sure what to say but I continued that I don't need Christmas to buy gifts for my family or friends because when money was never an issued I had no problem with building 1000 dollar computers or repairing cars or whatever. She understood after that.
   But the part about my little blowout there that is missing is that there are people depending on me and if feels like everything is going wrong that can go wrong. I had all of this planned out as one great big awesome idea and everything keeps getting in the way but for once, it's not about me using the law of attraction for anything. It's deeper than that. We all understand emotion and all I want to do is teach everyone how I lead to what i learned because it didn't cost me any money. I started with no money, I'm ending with no money and starting with no money again but with knowledge that no one has ever understood before. What makes this so weird is that I can talk about it with non bronies and it goes completely over peoples heads. But I start talking to a brony and they understand. A blog can only go so far but video's are the best and everything i've been trying to do has been so hard and crazy that my emotions sometimes get the best of me.  I'll get it sorted out I'm sure.