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Oblivion

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    The only one not diagnosed with.. something?

    in General Discussion

    Physically, I wear glasses and also have acid reflux. Never want to have to relive those weeks before I got diagnosed where I had a horrible stomachache that crippled me after dinner every night.

     

    Mentally? Diagnosed and have been taking medication for ADD for years. I also went to speech therapy as a child; I still tend to stutter when stressed and have to be reminded to "walk my talk" sometimes, but most people would have no idea. They also have no idea about the ADD, which is probably the most interesting of the conditions I have here.

     

     

     

     

     

    What's ADD like? 

     

    You wake up Saturday morning, eat your breakfast, and then go goof off for a while. You've got lots of homework to do, but you've adapted to the fact that you can't get anything done in the morning before your medication takes effect. That's why you have to wake up early every day just to eat, get dressed, and go to school on time.

     

    Then, a few hours later and just too late, you realize that you forgot to take your pills. You go to the kitchen, reach over for the bottle... and notice that, shit, it's empty. That mental fog of lethargy, which usually only happens in the morning and evenings, still hangs over you. You browse the internet in a vague stupor, unable to focus on anything hard.

     

    You're one of the smartest people you know, but you just can't quite think straight for now. Maybe you will be able to get something done after a break? Yes, that sounds good. You can't think well enough now. Sure. Break.

     

    You get an email from one of your friends, sending you notes for that... crap... that super important 1 hour long group project presentation on Monday. Then you minimize the window. You'll get to it... in a bit. Your eyes are just glazing over the project at this rate.

     

    A few hours later, you find that your sister's friend came to visit. You go over and mingle, as you usually do, but you keep giggling at weird things and you keep saying really dumb stuff and it won't stop coming out of your mouth. Some of it makes them laugh too, but some of it just gets you weird looks from your sis, and you aren't able to figure out which of those two it is before you start blurting them out.

     

    It's 9:40 pm and you decide enough is enough. You send your friend an email, apologizing for taking so long, and oh yes, you're getting to work now, really sorry for being a lazy shit. Then the words come out like molasses. You keep staring at your paper and back at the computer screen. You take short breaks this time, but they aren't helping. It's getting late and you're tired for real now. Just as you're sort of starting to get in a groove, you head off for bed.

     

    It's Sunday, and you empathetically make sure that you take your pills. With a clear mind, you set to work doing everything that you didn't do yesterday. You're not a procrastinator by nature... well, when your brain's operating, you're not. The work takes up a little over half of your day along with chores and other responsibilities. You finally send out those notes to everyone in your group for school, but you worry.

     

    Not about yourself. If you don't have it memorized, well, you know what you did. But you worry that everyone else is getting marked down for your failure, that the presentation's going to be awful because nobody had any time to practice thanks to you, that you'll screw it up also for everyone tomorrow because you're staying up late working on it and won't get enough sleep. 

     

    Then as you lie in bed, you remember that you're going to have to take money out of your paycheck when you're an adult for these expensive medications. A little bit that could go into savings, instead into making your head work right. Oh, joy.

     

    That's what having ADD is like.

     

    That's what happened to me last Saturday.

    I was actually diagnosed with ADD, all through grade school I had to take medication so I could focus, this might seem a little bit hypocritical saying this now, but the thing is I actually overcame it over time, and by the time I entered High School I, for the most part could sit still and listen...I think those disorders like that CAN possibly be beaten with enough will power to do so...

    Simpler Times

    in General Discussion

    I miss the good ole days when you could go buy a Pepsi in a glass bottle for 5 cents! Man, I think it would be fun to live back in those times!!! You could also bring your gun to school and go hunting behind the school, those were the days, so much simpler!

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