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Miles

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Blog Entries posted by Miles

  1. Miles
    Yesterday, my father and I went to see the Western Illinois Threshers Inc. 50th Annual Show in Hamilton, IL. There were many old tractors, a couple oil pull threshers, some garden tractors, some automobiles, and a few Mack trucks. This website describes it more in depth: http://www.westernillinoisthreshers.org/

    Here is an Oil Pull thresher/tractor (being used to turn the belt for a sawmill that is outside of the picture).

    CORRECTION: This is an Advance Rumely steam tractor/thresher (being used to turn the belt for a sawmill).* I had been looking at the actual Oil Pulls in the rest of my photos and accidentally typed the incorrect information for this particular tractor in this photo. Anyway, I may as well also add that "thresher" is a name given to tractors that can be used to "thresh" wheat from the hay -  "thresh: to separate the grain or seeds from (a cereal plant or the like) by some mechanical means, as by beating with a flail or by the action of a threshing machine." 






    If you want to look at a plethora of pictures of old tractors, download this .zip file I uploaded here: 

    Threshers_at_Hamilton_IL_8-4-17.zip

    Backup link on Dropbox just in case: 

    https://www.dropbox.com/s/uywtb77pdpzzwjw/Threshers at Hamilton IL 8-4-17.zip
  2. Miles
    So it's around 5:45 in the morning; I'm sleeping. Mind you, we've only all gotten moved back into college on Friday (or Saturday for some), and most people are in different townhouses than last year. Anyway, it's 5:45 AM and I'm asleep. I hear my door open which wakes me up. I figured it was my roommate because last year he had the room on the right, and myself the left, but this year it got switched. Well it turns out it wasn't my roommate.
     
    Someone walks into my room. I stay still, pretending to still be asleep. Then I feel someone gently touch my arm.
     
    "Scooch over" she said.
     
    u wut m8?
     
    Me: *Turns to look at her, as she stands by my bed* "Uhhhhh... Who are you?"
    Her: "I'm Chasidee. I'm looking for Kyle. He said [mumbling] booze [mumbling]."
    Me: "Uh-huh... Well, Kyle doesn't live here."
    Her: "Is there like a chair I can sit down?"
    Me: "Can you like... not be here? 'Cause I don't know who the fuck you are."
    Her: "I told you I'm Chasidee, looking for Kyle who plays soccer."
    Me: "He doesn't live here."
    Her: "Oh... Okay." *leaves*
     
    dafuq?
     
    She was obviously drunk. Lol.
     
    ~ Miles
  3. Miles
    The other day I was reading someone's blog, and came upon a single sentence that struck me in the best way possible. It was something that I had always known, but that I didn't know that I had always known. You may think that to be quite a contradiction, but I'm sure you'll understand what I mean after I tell you what that something is.
     
    At the time I read it, I was compelled to quote him in my comment, and tell him I totally agreed, but I didn't do anything more than that.
     
    Today, as I was watching an episode of - you guessed it - My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic (with Rivvy - we sync up the timing with Skype and watch together), a certain scene at the end reminded me of that very sentence from someone's blog.
     
    I doubt I need to tell you which episode this is from...
     
     
     
    Right when I saw this expression on Pinkie's face, I instantly remembered that sentence...
     
     
     
     
    After seeing Pinkie's emotional expression of love, I just knew that I had to make a blog. I believe what SCS said from the bottom of my heart. Love is the meaning of life.
     
    There are many different kinds of love, and each kind is special in its own way. There is a kind of love for anything. There is a kind of love for family, for a significant other (spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend/etc.), for friends, for animals, for nature, and there is a kind of love for objects and other things...
     
    But in the end, what matters is that you have it. No matter what life may bring you... no matter how hard things can get... there is nothing that should be able to take away your capacity to love.
     
    The ultimate goal of my blog is this:
     
    People might say that words can lose value if used to often. But I'm here to tell you otherwise. You are you, and when you use a word and truly mean it, then you do truly mean it, and using it over and over again does not weaken its value - it strengthens it. So I want you to remember that love is a powerful word, but it's more than just that...
     
    Love is the meaning of life.
     
    And the meaning of life is love.
     

     
    Honestly,
    Miles
     
     
     
  4. Miles
    ***I'm not trying to start any arguments. I just want to know if anyone has ever thought about this, or maybe even if someone can help me possibly come closer to a better understanding.***
     
    ---
     
    It's not that I am having doubts, per se, but rather have over time pondered some thoughts and questions... But I think this will mostly be centered around one main, overarching topic.
     

     
    How?
     
    I just can't wrap my mind around how it is possible. The fact that there are so many variations and/or denominations of Christianity, in itself, goes to show that we [as humans] have obviously done what Peter says not to.
     
    There are indeed some parts of the Bible where the meaning is clear enough such that most denominations understand it the same way... But it's obvious that there are also plenty of things that are not literal, are not simple, are not easily understandable... Which leads to arguments among Christians.
     
    ---
     
    However let's finish that line:
     

     
    By all means, I still am a Christian; still believe as much as I always did. But the way in which I believe is different from it used to be.
     
    Anyway, I think that the passage above is just too unspecific. Because, for one to be provoked by the Holy Spirit to write in His Word is still one's writing. Hmm... I should explain more...
     
    There is a vast difference between how the Holy Spirit resides within us, and possession... (obviously)...
     
    The Bible tells us we have free will, yes? So, for one to have written Scripture via the Holy Spirit's initiative, it is (in my understanding) much more like the planting of the idea/concept itself within one's mind via the Holy Spirit, and then one's own conscious interpretation of that idea into words.
     
    If that is the case, the idea was already interpreted from the moment it was originally transcribed.
     
    Otherwise, if that isn't the case, then what Peter is suggesting is that the Holy Spirit possessed him [Peter], and the rest of the authors of the books of the Bible, such that the Holy Spirit [would] be the sole Author.
     
    Now I know that isn't true!
     
    So obviously, you can see why I'm having issues with the above line from Peter.
     
    Does anyone have a way to help me understand that?
     
    Thanks,
     
    ~ Miles
  5. Miles
    So I came up with a question - how many members are there with zero posts?
     
    I clicked "Overall Top Posters" on the main page:
     

     
    Went to the very last page, and starting jumping backwards to the point where the members listed on the top of the page had 1 post, and all the rest after it had 0 posts. That is page 1021 of 1555.
     
    Each page lists 20 members...
     
    *As of 4:30 AM, 3/8/2016*
     
    The last page only had 1 member, and page 1021 had 9 members with 0 posts.
     
    (1554 - 1022) = 532 pages
     
    532 * 20 members per page = 10,640 members
     
    10,640 + 10 members (from page 1021 and 1555) = 10,650 members with zero posts
     
    According to the main page, there are 33,289 total members
     
    (10,650/33,289) * 100 = ~32%
     
    Now of course, I know there are sections of the forums here where post count doesn't increase, but there's not much significance to me even doing this math in the first place, so whatever.
     
    Essentially, every 1 in 3 members here have zero posts...
     
    I guess they likely made an account, never posted, and didn't come back, or lurked and never posted, etc.
     
    I just felt like this was an interesting statistic to make a blog about.
     
    ~ Miles
     
    P.S. Yes, I waited to publish this til mid-day, rather than posting it at 5am, lol.
  6. Miles
    I was at church yesterday, and during the sermon I thought to myself how ironic it is that I'd grown up going to this church, which teaches and preaches of things I do not agree with...
     
    *Sigh*
     
    For a long time I've been realizing the amount of attention that religion has been getting (here [on the forums] and everywhere [in real life, generally]). It's sad to see that more often than not, the people talking are, on both sides, stubborn.
     
    I know what you may have been thinking, "oh great, another rant on religion" - but I ask you to hear me out, because this isn't like the rest.
     
    ---
     
    Humans. We are all humans. So, that's the one string that should keep everything tied together to begin with.
     
    We believe what we see and hear in the ways that we want to, and develop our own opinions on things. And that's fine. Actually, that's great. This is a good thing.
     
    The bad thing is when people forget that they might not be right, and that there may be a better opinion on something. Close-mindedness creates a plethora of stubborn people who become hard-coded, stuck, unchangeable.
     
    ---
     
    We see all these threads/topics here on religion, and recently I've begun to grow stale of responding to them.
     
    Yes, I'm a Christian, so you ask, "Why? (am I growing stale of responding to religious threads)?"
     
    They aren't going anywhere, that's why.
     
    Circle after circle, they wind up ending where they began, with the same people supporting the same exact opinion they held from the beginning.
     
    *Hits the table*
     
    Seriously, what the heck is the point of discussion that is meant to enlighten others if it cannot progress?
     
    I am sick of seeing these circles. A discussion that goes nowhere is worthless and I'm not going to respond to people who aren't going to listen to me.
     
    ---
     
    if you're going to engage in discussion with others about something - about anything - don't think that what you believe, what your opinion is, is perfect.
     
    It isn't.
     
    My opinions are FAR from perfect and I know that, which is why I love to discuss things; I like learning!
     
    ---
     
    Open your ears and close your eyes.
     
    You can't see anything but what you already know.
     
    You can only see what others see by listening to them.
     
    This is why I've named the title of this blog what I did.
     
    Children are easy to teach because they are listening; they are ready to learn; they seek answers to things they don't know.
     
    Children don't know enough yet to have their minds closed; children learn because it's what they seek.
     
    When we grow up we must force ourselves to keep seeking in the same way children do.
     
    Otherwise we grow stale, close-minded, and unable to learn anything; from here, the circles begin.
     
    I'm talking to BOTH sides here; the religious and the non-religious.
     
    If you shut your ears to others you are limiting not only yourself, but you are making what others say worthless to say.
     
    ---
     
    (and now we're shifting gears, finally, into overdrive)
     
    ---
     
    "Was the Bible written by man or God" - "[insert circle talk]" / "Does God contradict Himself?" - "[insert circle talk]" / "Is the Bible infallible" ... "Does the Bible actually promote hate" ... "Does the Bible hate gays" ... "What does the Bible say about [x, y, z...]" ...
     
    AAARRGGGHHH
     
    No. I must keep it together.
     
    LISTEN.
     
    The Bible is the WORD of God... NOT GOD HIMSELF.
     
    The Bible is a TEXT that has been TRANSLATED many times.
     
    The Bible is NOT to be WORSHIPPED for ITSELF.
     
    GOD is to be WORSHIPPED if you want to be a Christian.
     
    ---
     
    Stop talking about contradictions, stop talking about "the Bible promotes [this and this]" ...
     
    Start LISTENING to Jesus Christ.
     
    If you are [a Christian]... We are followers of Jesus. We are His Children. He is our Messiah, Saviour, Teacher, Lord, and our BASIS for any creed we are going to believe in.
     
    Stop using your eyes and start using your EARS to listen to what He says. Don't read it; hear it.
     
    ---
     
    What is religion?
     
    It is a belief of a creed; a set of rules placed by a deity that we follow.
     
    What is Christiany?
     
    It is a FAITH in the Lord. A creed is placed using the Bible to record the rules God has given AND to record the history of the times it was written.
     
    The Bible is a historical text because it includes memory of things from the past!
     
    ---
     
    The Bible is split into two halves:
     
    The Old Testament and the New Testament.
     
    The Old Testament is OLD. It is Jewish Law. It is history. We as Christians must not read the Old Testament thinking that we are to follow its rules. We aren't Jewish! We're Christians!
     
    JESUS CHRIST did not exist before the New Testament.
     
    The Old Testament is the recording of rules placed for the times that were BEFORE CHRIST.
     
    Our religion is called Christianity because we are to follow the teachings of Jesus Christ.
     
    The teachings of Christ are in the NEW Testament.
     
    What does Jesus say about the Old Testament???
     
     
    He says that the greatest Commandments are to LOVE. To Love God; and to Love each other.
    Why? Why are these the greatest of commandments?
     
     
    Because
    GOD IS LOVE
     
    And he wants us to love Him and everyone and everything.
     
    ---
     
    "The Way"
     
    There is sooo much misinterpretation about what "The Way" is.
     
    There isn't just one way to the Lord!
     
    There are infinite ways to the Lord because there can be infinite people who can love.
     
    On the other hand, there's only one way to not follow the Lord.
     
    There is only one way to following the Devil.
     
    That is hate.
     
    There is only one way to Hell and that is to hate people and to hate the Lord.
     
    The Devil doesn't want you to love anything. Not even him. He wants you to hate anything and everything.
     
    God wants you to love Him and love each other and love everything.
     
    So what is "The Way" that so many Christians like to debate about?
     
    "The Way" is your path to the Lord.
     
    "The Way" is how you love the Lord and love each other.
     
    How do you love? Everyone's love can differ. So there are multiple ways to love. There are infinite ways to love.
     
    There is only one way to not love and that is to hate.
     
    And there is only one way to hate, and that is to not love.
     
    ---
     


     
     
     
     
    That is a Christian ROCK song. It is about asking for life; asking for the breath of life to be breathed into us.
     
    What is life - how do we live?
     


     
     
     
     
    You speak LOVE you speak LIFE.
     
    Love is life.
     
    How do we love?
     

     
    We love in our ways.
     
    ---
     
    Jesus Christ was a contemporary.
     
    And so should we all be.
     
    Be contemporary, and open your mind.
     
    Be contemporary, and open your heart.
     
    Listen to Him. The most important rules of being a Christian are to love God and to love each other.
     
    ALL The other things of the law and the prophets hang on those commandments about love.
     
    The BIBLE hangs on the LAW OF LOVE!
     
    That is the greatest Law of all!
     
    LOVE.
     
    ---
     
    So when I hear other Christians preaching to live by other rules, to believe that God wants us to do certain things and everything else...
     
    I shake my head because that doesn't matter!
     
    The Bible is only about love. The New Testament fulfills the Old, and Jesus tells us that all that matters is to LOVE.
     
    So stop pinpointing the rules of the Old Testament and saying that God is anti-this and anti-that.
     
    God isn't ANTI ANYTHING. God is LOVE. And He sees and hears the hearts, the souls, the minds of EVERYONE.
     
    The Holy Spirit of God is in us ALL and it pushes us to learn the truth about what God wants us to know.
     
    It pushes us to know that God loves us, and that we should love Him, and that we should love ourselves, and that we should love each other and everything.
     
    LOVE is not about limiting others. LOVE is not about setting rules against being who you are. LOVE is not about stopping someone from doing what isn't wrong.
     
    The Old Testament was written in a time where certain rules needed to be put in place because God was protecting His people from harm.
     
    Don't eat certain meats; men should be circumcised; do not have pre-marital sex; do not have sex with prostitutes; do not be a prostitute, etc...
     
    God doesn't hate anyone. God wanted what was best for his people at a time when there were many diseases and health issues that could be the death of His people because they didn't have the knowledge or tools or doctors able enough to cure those illnesses.
     
    TIME CHANGES.
     
    We are now in a time when we DO have all that. We have the knowledge, the tools, and the doctors... NOT ONLY to treat those illnesses, but to prevent ourselves from getting sick in the first place. We leave in a MUCH cleaner world and we DON'T need to worry about the rules of the OLD Testament because Jesus fulfilled the Old with the NEW Testament.
     
    Think about it, fellows. Does it matter that some of us might eat those certain meats; that some of us might not be circumcised; that some of us may have sex before marriage; that some of us may have a sexuality other than straight?
     
    NO!
     
    It doesn't matter!
     
    Because the NEW Testament fulfilled the old with the new.
     
    The New Testament is NOT a contradiction; Jesus did NOT contradict God's words by overruling the old law.
     
    Jesus FULFILLED the Old.
     
    Jesus knew that we would grow into a society where we HAVE the ability to prevent and cure these illnesses. Jesus knew that as time passes, things change, and that to be PROGRESSIVE and move forward WITH time, that the NEW LAW did NOT need to worry about the same stuff as the Old Law did.
     
    WE CHANGED; not God; but God WANTED this change to happen, and He knew it would; and it makes Him happy that we can move forward with time and be PROGRESSIVE.
     
    We aren't "playing God" by preventing and curing illness. We are bettering ourselves under His name. He wants us to become better and smarter! He likes it that we have been able to overcome the illnesses that humans once used to be unable to deal with.
     
    That's why Jesus was able to create His progressive stance. Jesus wanted us to move forward and be contemporary.
     
    And now, in our contemporary world, it is 2015.
     
    We have come so far! Look at the amazing things we've been blessed with!
     
    To have hospitals to bare a child in! To have doctors to help with the birth of new life!
     
    To have technology to become connected on an online web of data where we can store information and talk to each other and create new societies!
     
    To have technology to build vehicles so we can travel long distances in short periods of time!
     
    To live in a greater world...
     
    It's AWESOME!
     
    And God LOVES it.
     
    He is sooo happy that we have been able to do this!
     
    THIS... right here... this website dedicated to letting people who like a show about LOVE, a show about ponies where the leader's duty (Twilight) is to create HARMONY among the people!
     
    God Bless it! Thank you God for giving us this show and this website that allows us to be able to create such a wonderful community...
     
    Thank you for being with us when we came together here! In Jesus name, AMEN!
     
    ---
     
    Can't you understand now, that Christianity is about LOVE!
     
    Spreading His Word doesn't need to be done with the Bible, for, we spread his word every second we breathe when we are loving each other and loving Him!
     

     
    Love,
     
    Yours Truly,
     
    Miles
     
     
     
  7. Miles

    A Good Update

    By Miles,

    Although many would say "don't speak too soon - you'll jinx it," but, I don't believe that's the case.
     
    A month ago a made a blog (as well as another a month before that) explaining some emotional discomforts. I was in the midst of going through a periodically recurring cycle. For the past 3 years, I would seem to go through it once per year, always around the start of fall, when I go back to college. Typically, it would last until winter came...
     
    Well, I believe I broke the cycle. I think I know how, too. Looking back, I figured out the cause of why I would go through it.
     
    I've always been prone to deep emotional attachments, especially being attached to home. But it's more than that. I used to be very uncomfortable with change. Very uncomfortable with progression. And that caused me to have a sort of pseudo-psychological issue with growing up and moving forward.
     
    I lived life looking through a retrospective lens. That made it difficult for me leave home, because leaving home meant not only going somewhere different, but it meant leaving behind the place where all the good memories existed.
     
    I'm an INFJ. The best single word description of that is "protector." I always have tons of thoughts running through my mind. I have a strong sense of instinct and intuition. I act mostly on feelings (though that isn't to say I'm an illogical person).
     
    Growing up, I have always been a person to have a select few close friends. Ironically, I also have always sort of been a nomad, in terms of friend groups. There are a few specific people that I've always stuck close with, ever since elementary school. But in high school, I never really fit in to any specific group quite right. My personality makes me a shape that doesn't fit in the slot that my friend's personalities fit into. Having older, Baby Boomer parents, I was raised much more like a Gen-X kid, rather than the Gen-Y that I technically am.
     
    Yet, I still managed to find happiness, and was able to be more than content in my life when I was younger. People say college is supposed to be the best years of your life. But I never have been known to abide by typical social norms and ideas. Although I'm not saying college isn't good - as, I have made great friends via these forums - but, I believe high school was the best. I miss playing in band, and I miss acting in plays in drama/theatre. Band and theatre were the two places where I actually fit in perfectly. I clicked with most everyone in those groups. Although I am introverted, I'm able to be outgoing when I feel comfortable with the people I'm around, and I did feel comfortable in those places.
     
    My hometown is very small, and very country. There's one set of stoplights in the middle of town. A population of 2500. Around 250 kids at most in the high school in total; my grad class had 43 kids. Even though the county is technically a democratic county, politically speaking, it really is quite conservative in terms of people's lifestyles.
     
    Anyway, for 18 years I had been used to all that. It was home. And naturally, it molded me into thinking it was who I was. And I took it for granted.
     
    Then I went to college in the fall of 2013, and that's when it all happened. My first semester of college my freshman year was just... horrible. I went through way more than mere homesickness. I was just outright sad, and it kept getting worse. I began to go numb emotionally, around the start of December. I had many nights of insomnia, so I was living with little sleep. I wasn't eating well. I was really unhealthy. My fingernails began to get white spots, which are caused by lack of nutrition. I dropped like 15 or 20 pounds that semester.
     
    But then I found MLP. It was a Godsend. I finally had something to attach to while I was away from home. Something pure. The next semester, the spring of 2014, I was a lot better. I was feeling happy, eating better, and things just went smoother. I even began to rethink my values and beliefs, and my political ideology. I used to be a Conservative, but I became a Libertarian after my exposure to being away from home at college, and also with my exposure to MLP.
     
    For 6 months, I was totally a closet brony. Finally I realized I wanted to find a place online to talk to people about the show. I found MLP Forums in the summer of 2014.
     
    But of course, I became re-attached to being at home, so even with having MLP, when I went back to college my sophomore year, I went through another sort of emotional cycle. It wasn't as bad, but it wasn't fun either.
     
    Then come spring of 2015, I came out of it, and was feeling better again.
     
    This summer I had a different job than what I had the previous 5 summers. Previously I'd worked for my city, on the Street Department, doing mostly roadwork and patching - shoveling asphalt out the back of a ton truck in the summer heat. But this summer, I worked as a cashier at our local grocery store. It was only part time.
     
    Then it was time to go back to college. I'm a junior now. And I was beginning to fall back into another emotional cycle...
     
    But I caught myself. I knew it was coming before it came. So I went in with a shield.
     
    The cycle didn't last long this fall. I realized that by allowing myself to be comfortable and happy while away from home, and that by allowing myself to be who I want to be, I could stop the cycle.
     
    I won't say that I know for sure whether or not I've been able to stop the cycle from recurring again next fall, but I can say that I know I feel great right now.
     
    It's hard to believe I'm already a junior in college. It's hard to believe I just recently turned 21... But I've managed to accept that I'm halfway through college, and that I'll have to stay focused these next two years. Right now my goal is keep striving to do my best in college, and to start thinking about where I want to go after I graduate.
     
    Love,
     
    ~ Miles
     
     
     
  8. Miles

    Facing The Truth

    By Miles,

    When people ask me if I'm ready to go back to college, all I ever say is essentially: "It's not that I don't like college; I do. I just don't like leaving home."
     
    I've always been that way. A "home boy" - literally speaking.
     
    But how true is that anymore...
     
    I'm beginning to hate this hellhole. The only reason I loved it so much to begin with is because it's all I ever had, it's the only place I had lived. This backwards, country town, with it's traditionally minded citizens. Masking the dirty little secrets with the cover up of "we're a small hometown community." Fake smiles, impersonal nods, petty small talk... it's becoming meaningless to me.
     
    I used to be so much a part of the culture that I loved it. It was who I was. Albeit a slighty nerdy one, I was a diehard country boy. I would tell myself that after college I wanted to find a career that wasn't too far away from home. I wanted to stay close because I was attached to my hometown.
     
    But growing older and wiser, and knowing now the truths that I never realized before... Although this town is on-route, in the middle of a main highway between bigger better towns... This really is a dead end town.
     
    There's literally nothing here.
     
    And for what other good reason did I keep holding on? Friends and family...?
     
    Yah, I used to have that.
     
    This summer has really sucked for me. Because of reasons out of my control, my family has been growing apart. My friends have moved on to lead their own lives elsewhere. And it never phased me when I was stuck in my hometown mindset, because "at least I'll still have home."
     
    So now I look at the big picture and see where I really do stand now. The "old me" was holding back who I could really be, who I could really become. Trying to hold on to things that I have no control of.
     
    Fuck it. I'm sick and tired of it. This town is nothing but stuck in the past. The only good it holds for me anymore is memories long gone. The only thing it has it what it used to be.
     
    When I was a little boy, I had a great relationship with my parents. We were very close. So going to college my freshman year left me in a pile of emotional pain.
     
    Since then I've grown up. Since then I've realized how ridiculous this town is. Since then I've realized how insensitive living a conservative lifestyle can be.
     
    Now knowing what I really want, and who I can be, it's obvious that this town will do nothing but hold me back. That's not to say it won't still hurt me to leave. It will. It's bound to. Because it's just how I am. But I don't want to be stuck in a dead end town anymore. There's nothing to look forward to here anymore. This town has a minuscule population of 2500, one set of stoplights, two gas stations, one grocery store, and nothing but corn and beans surrounding it. I used to say that as if it were cool. As if I liked it. As if such a country place were warm and comfortable, emotionally. But the truth is, that it isn't. It's become a leech. Sucking the life out of me.
     
    My family is no longer close like it used to be. We're broken. We live apart in different places, leading lives indifferent to each other.
     
    I'm a loving, caring, emotional, sensitive person. I need to feel loved, to feel wanted. But I don't feel it anymore. And if I don't receive it from them, it's not worth giving it to them. I can't fix them. My cousins, my aunts and uncles, my family on both my mom and dad's side... have grown apart from me. Have grown apart from each other... Have grown apart from one another...
     
    It's not like it used to be. Ever since my grandma died back in 2006, the breaking apart began. Little by little the separation began. And it's held together by mere jump rope, fishing lines, and duct tape.
     
    I want to be me. I want to be strong. I want to love, and live a caring life. I want to enjoy being where I am, and being with people who care.
     
    My parents, being older, will soon retire from their jobs. Likely as soon as I am done with college in two years.
     
    They've helped me all my life. They've done everything they can to show me that they want me to become more than what they were. Have a better life than they had. But rather than feeling like they are doing that while trying to keep a solid, close relationship with me, they've been pushing me away. And I can't bear it. I can't. It's nothing but a wooden rollercoaster. I don't know what to expect from them anymore.
     
    My mom is stubborn as a mule. She doesn't understand why this all is happening. But the fact is, her own naievete is to blame. She herself has been pushing me away and doesn't realize it.
     
    My dad... he knows. He sees it. But rather than doing anything at all to try to mend things, he does absolutely nothing to help. Nothing. He's distant. He's evasive. He doesn't want to take control because he's too mentally weak to handle it anymore.
     
    I'm not saying that I don't feel loved by them anymore; I certainly do. But they don't want me here any longer than I have to be. Even though they'll feel the empty nest when I do find a career, and start living on my own somewhere... They want me to lead my own life as soon as I can.
     
    And yet, somehow, mom says she'd really like to see grandkid before she dies.
     
    WOW. Really mom? Really? You damn well know I HATE the subject of death. Don't put that shit on me. Don't fucking make me even THINK about that.
     
    I am not naive. My parents are in their early 60s. I know they in the last quadrant of their lives. But dear LORD, I am going to ball my eyes out when it happens. I am so weak emotionally. I really am. I may be stronger willed than both of my parents combined, and I may be physically stronger too, but I am emotionally as strong as a toddler. I don't handle negative emotions well.
     
    So telling me that I should hurry up MY LIFE and try to find a way to have kids before you... pass...
     
    What in God's name are you trying to do to me, mom? I don't want to hear that...
     
    You're the last stronghold I have, mom. I've never loved anyone more than you, because you were always there for me... *tears*
     
    ...
     
    But yet, you don't even know me very well anymore. I've changed. A lot. And you see the hints. And you see the contradiction I've become. But you don't know me because I can't let you in. I can't let you in because who I am now isn't who you want me to be. Your conservative, traditional Christian personality is a spitting image of this bigoted society we live in. You wouldn't have voted in favor of gay marriage legalized nationwide if you could have. And if you furthermore knew I was a brony, too, you'd be at a loss for words, because you are incapable of understanding.
     
    ...
     
    I don't know who I will become in the next two or three years. I don't know where I will find a career. I don't know where I'll live. I don't know if I'll find a women to have kids with; [don't know if I'll find a guy, either]...
     
    I can't predict the future.
     
    So don't lay that shit on me. Don't force me to hurry my life because I lead at my own pace. I take my steps in my directions.
     
    ---
     
    I don't know if I'll be able to make many [close] new friends [irl]. I'll be a junior at my college this fall... and I've made ONE true friend there. One.
     
    It's nobody's fault but my own.
     
    I didn't try to make friends, because I didn't want any. I was stuck trying to hold onto my old friends, hoping and praying that we wouldn't split apart. But to no avail. They're leading their own lives now as am I.
     
    But even if I tried, there's nobody as compatible of friends than who I used to have back in high school.
     
    I'm such a paradox, such a contradiction. Introverted to the core, yet in public you'd think I was extraverted. And that's because I was raised to be outgoing. Raised to be friendly, and nice, to everyone. I only do it because I care. Care about people.
     
    I'm an INFJ. I'm a country boy. I'm a nerd. I'm a brony. I'm bisexual. I used to be conservative but now I'm a Libertarian. I like cars and manual labor... I like people, animals, and the world, because I'm humanitarian, but I'm 2 years into my computer science major with partial scholarships and a 3.75 GPA.
     
    Truth is, I should have picked a humanitarian career to pursue. I would work best in such a field. But coming from hickville, where people see careers as jobs to pay the bills, and nothing more, I was forced to find something that would let me have a greater chance at getting a good income. So it was down to some sort of engineering career, or computer science. I didn't go engineering because at the time I felt I wanted to stay close to home, and if I did that, I'd end up a mere hometown mechanic. No offense to people who love to be mechanics; do what you love. But that's not for me. So I chose computers. I like computers. But I'm not a very logically oriented person, and learning how to code/program doesn't come easy for me. I see others in my field, learning these new languages and coding as if it were second nature. But I struggle. The logic is hard for me. But I have to keep trying. I won't back down. I will do it.
     
    And I know. I know. I shouldn't live life thinking about what I could have done or who I could have been. But I'm only 20, soon to be 21, and it's hard not to right now.
     
    What makes it worse is that having been raised by older parents who are of the Baby Boomer generation, they raised me like a Gen-X kid rather than Gen-Y. So, despite technically being a Gen-Y, I have very little in common with people my age. I have a stronger moral code. I feel things have a sake of their own. I feel that sometimes the traditional way of doing things is better, but other times I feel the more modern way of doing things is better. I don't always do things the most efficient way. I don't always do things the hard way, either. It just depends.
     
    ---
     
    So where am I in life right now? What do I have right now that I can hold onto and love? What can I always look back to, in current time, to keep me motivated, to keep me moving forward?
     
    Unfortunately, the primary answer is: habits. Somehow, I find motivation in routine, in familiarity, in consistent and persistent ways. What I'm doing right now in life isn't necessarily hurting me, so thus it is working, however efficient or non-efficient that may be, however helpful or hurtful of my health and well being it may be... I have it.
     
    Merely the fact that I can wake up everyday, follow some sort of routine, and know at the end of the day that somehow it works for me, it keeps me going.
     
    Luckily, the secondary answer, which is still kind of a part of the primary, is MLP, MLPForums, and the friends I have here or have made here.
     
    Lastly, the ultimate reason is my religion.
     
    ---
     
    But, the point of this blog isn't about asking myself who I am. It's about asking myself who I really want to be.
     
    And truthfully, I know I'm lucky to be who I am right now. If not for the amazing serendipity I've had in my life, I wouldn't be as happy or as strong as I am now.
     
    So, maybe I'm not ready to answer who I want to be right now. I still have 2 more years of college; 2 more years of whatever is to come, before I start out leading a totally individual (on my own) life. I'm still under my parents roof right now, and despite the problems I may encounter here at home with my town, with my family, and with my parents, I'm still living, breathing, and I'm still talking to you, whomever is reading this, right now. So maybe if I take a step back right now, I'll be able to take two steps forward in due time.
     
    As always,
     
    Honestly,
     
    ~ Miles
     
    P.S. Sorry for the crude language above. Emotions got the best of me.
     
     
  9. Miles
    *Disclaimer: Very much flow writing, as my mind has been bouncing about around thoughts at the speed of sound that I have to just let loose, and chronology may not exist in this*
     
    ---
     
    College
     
    Becoming and an adult
     
    Opportunity and free will
     
    attachments
     
    ...
     
    It's freaking weird. It's so familiar, yet so unknown. It's so close, yet light years away. I have felt it before. But this isn't the same. It's not the same thing it felt the last time, nor the time before it.
     
    What is it? When did I have it? Why did I, why do I, go through it...
     
    It's not the same groundhog day deja-vu but still has the same effect.
     
    I push it to try and fight back but it's strong...
     
    But I won't let it win this fall. I'm stronger now. So it's not gonna win. Not this fucking time.
     
    ...
     
    When I went to college for the first time, back in the fall of 2013 (and dammit if I haven't told that story here before)... I started to feel numb.
     
    It was only homesickness for the first couple of weeks but then it changed. And it wasn't for the better. I felt a disconnect from... almost everything.
     
    By the time the coldness of autumn's progression came, I was searching for a way to find myself again. At the time, living in a dorm, I had a roommate who was never, never there... because he was always out with his friends or spending the night with someone else. So I was alone. And the irony... oh... how I made it ironic... I purposely locked myself alone in my cooped up dorm room except for when I had to go to class. Around late October I started watching old movies that were favorites of mine from my early childhood. As if that would help!? All it made me do was find the ability to feel again, but it was nothing but pain and sadness, so I cried my eyes out.
     
    And one night I just closed my laptop turned off the lights and kneeled down, placing my head on my bed... grasping my hands together...
     
    I prayed...
     
    *tears*
     
    And He answered. Very soon after.
     
    Because I found something that would became the start of something new in my life that could keep me grounded.
     
    I honestly, honestly was not even skeptical at the least bit. I found out about the fandom, and via the fact that I had just been watching old kid's movies, that maybe MLP would be something better.
     
    And it was.
     
    Winter of 2013. I found my foothold on my emotions, and pulled myself up... And the power I felt when I was getting back on my feet was beyond the threshold that I'd ever felt before. After watching the first two episodes of MLP I was hooked. It was literally a Godsend, because it was so pure... So pure...
     
    Watching MLP while keeping steady straight A's in the Spring of 2014, (my second semester of college), I kept it secret. I was able to do that for a good while keeping strong.
     
    Going home for the summer after my freshmen year, I was okay because I was at home... And in the most literal textbook definition, I am a homeboy, a country kind of kin, a small-townsy child trapped inside a body of a new adult.
     
    Finally I came to a point where I realized I needed to talk to people about liking MLP, but it had to be online, because Lord knows the kind of folks back at home would just not understand at all...
     
    I found MLP Forums, late June, 2014. Hit the ground running, so hard, so fast, I was ready to fly, ready to talk about how much I loved the show.
     
    But let me not forget to explain how much of an introvert I truly am... The paradox that I am so verbose, yet I am shy, and introverted...
     
    I did find the ability to make some friends. And I am glad I did.
     
    But then I relapsed when I went back to college as a sophomore. Went through similar feelings as the last fall, but less harsh. Less harsh, but why? For a couple reasons. One is that my roommate was similar to me, and was there a lot, so I wasn't alone. But he isn't a brony, so that's a no-go.
     
    I'll explain the other reason why here momentarily, but first let me explain further the kind of "in-limbo" feeling, the second cycle of my downfall, when I went back to college as a sophomore...
     
    Don't misinterpret this for depression; no, no, not that. I don't, and haven't ever had that... But, it's a different kind of thing. A plateau, rather than a slope. But it's not on the same graph, not on the same plane as one's normal plethoric array of emotions and feelings...
     
    It's like a glitch. It's like a slip through the graphics. If you've ever seen the movie Inception, think about what "in-limbo" means.
     
    Anyway... Back to the other reason that the feeling wasn't as harsh in the fall of 2014.
     
    I made a post in a rock thread, if I remember correctly, and I think I was talking about Linkin Park...
     
    Someone responded and we clicked, just right then. I befriended him. Being the kind of person, at least at the time, to be able to look at friend's status updates, when I saw that he'd made a subtly sad status I felt the urge to send him a PM.
     
    From there we began to get to know each other through PM-ing here, back and forth. Then we started messaging on Skype.
     
    I'm... going to save details here...
     
    But I got back out of the weird state again, and then when my 4th semester began I was doing well. And did well.
     
    College got harder of course. By then I was still keeping mostly A's with a few stray B's.
     
    Went back home for the summer. Summer of 2015...
     
    It was weird.
     
    I didn't have the same job, my parents and I got into a few arguments, I had a bit of an issue at a family party, and some other bullshit.
     
    But despite it all, I still cried when it was time to go back to college.
     
    And now here I am.
     
    Semester 5. Just got through the first week as a junior. Gosh it doesn't feel right.
     
    And if my instinct served me right as it always intuitively has seemed to do... I felt it. Coming back.
     
    This week.
     
    Middle of it.
     
    I felt the slight, tiny, subtle onset...
     
    And it started again.
     
    BUT here I am now, and I'll be damned if I am gonna allow myself to feel the same thing AGAIN this time.
     
    I was fooled twice so yeah shame on me, but this is year 3 and I'm smarter, stronger, and wiser than last times.
     
    So I came here, to my blog, to spout out, to vent, to try and contemplate 70 million thoughts and feelings all combined into one thread of my conscience...
     
    The feelings are more different this time than the last. But it's not full bore yet and that is why I have the upper-hand in this match. I'm going in with a shield this time.
     
    At first I didn't know what to use as my shield but then it just ... came to me.
     
    My shield is literally the opposite of a shield...
     
    My shield is... trying to get out of my old self, my shell... trying to talk more, trying to force myself to see the glass as half full... trying to become MORE than what I am just yet... Because even though I'd sworn that I had figured it out, who I was, last winter, I'm contradicting the past me and telling him off. He doesn't know what I do now.
     
    I know more about myself now than I ever could have imagined I'd be able to know.
     
    I've explored my mind, my imagination, my inner core, my deep inner abyss...
     
    I hacked into my brain and found my mission.
     
    My mission, possibly something related to having ADHD, is trying to allow myself to better connect my subconscious to my conscience... bring forward the background, and throw the frontground forward even father!
     
    I realized how much of a disconnect I've always had with myself. I realized that there were feelings and beliefs and thoughts and ideas inside myself I never knew was there and I want them to stop hiding and come to life...
     
    I know it may sound weird but... I'm sure you've all heard of a mid-life crisis before...
     
    Well, you see, I believe there is something I would like to call a quarter-life crisis.
     
    Some people may understand what I mean by that, some may not.
     
    Around the time that a person starts to "legally" become an adult, but mentally doesn't feel any more maturity or progression... plus and minus a few years...
     
    So, the ages of 18 through mid 20's...
     
    It's a time where we're told by society that we are old enough to take responsibility for ourselves and everything we do.
     
    For some, the road after high school ends may lead to just finding a job somewhere and hoping to find a way to climb the ladder. My father had that. He never went to college, he went straight to the factory after high school. Then he switched to a different company. Then he kept climbing from the bottom of the ladder, and now, he's at a pretty solid position, though he's very close to retirement age.
     
    He was forced to adulthood quickly.
     
    For him, and others who take that route, I cannot relate, so if they have a quarter-life crisis, it isn't the kind that I'm having...
     
    I am in the intermediate stage right now. I just started my junior year of college...
     
    And now instead of a dormitory, I'm in a townhouse, and I have my own room.
     
    So I'm alone... Again...
     
    But as I said, I am going to fight the cycle I've had.
     
    I don't know how to explain this... But here goes:
     
    We really do have free will, but the problem is that we really don't allow ourselves to totally utilize it.
     
    Why? Because society makes it that way. We have to be "normal" and have to find some way to make money to have any kind of happy life at all.
     
    I'd love to find someone to live with, you know... after college.
     
    But what if I said that the choices I want to make are too hard because of one stupid, stupid fucking reason...
     
    Money.
     
    And the amount it takes to GO anywhere.
     
    You have to have it to make it, and have to have it to even BE, to even LIVE, to eat and drink and have shelter...
     
    So you have to find a career. I chose to go to college. No, scratch that. I didn't choose it. I didn't choose it. I just DID it. It wasn't by my true free will. And I'm not saying I didn't want to go, I'm just saying that it sort of HAPPENED and the real me stuck inside had nothing to do with that decision.
     
    ...
     
    Right now, I just want to say that I understand the main thing in life is to LOVE.
     
    But what makes it hard is the distance.
     
    People really love the saying "oh wow, it's a small world after all, isn't it!" NO IT IS NOT. It's fucking HUGE. And there are SO MANY people that COULD be SOMEONE to me that I haven't met...
     
    OR.
     
    That I DO KNOW, just not in person, and only know online...
     
    And I want it so bad...
     
    To be able to have it now...
     
    To be able to have TRUE free will to just GO.
     
    But that would contradict 75% of what I am anyway. I'm so paradoxical. I love love love HOME and I hate leaving home... It hurts my heart to be away from home...
     
    But reality SUCKS.
     
    And my parents are nearing retirement... once I'm out of college they will retire...
     
    Of course I know they WANT me to LIVE my OWN life...
     
    But my hearrrrrt ....
     
    So badly....
     
    hurts
     
    to
    know
    that I will have to leave them, leave home,
     
    Leave to live my own life after college.
     
    It's a battle I fight every day now it seems...
     
    Knowing that there are so many opportunities... that there's someone I'd like to meet in person so bad...
     
    It's a battle I gotta live through in order to keep living...
     
    I'm not a person to beg but I pray to God that somehow my life will find its way into what I can call ... Good.
     
    Good in a certain... very very certain manner than I can't speak right now... because I know it but can't say it...
     
    In a way that I know but can't explain...
     
    I'm on the outside looking in right now, trying to see why I have been so lucky to be honest, totally honest... I am lucky... Because I have up to this point honestly been very lucky to have what I have...
     
    I don't wish to bother with this topic much but I reckon if it came from my subconsience by way of flow writing it'd ought to be said:
     
    I don't know my birth parents.
     
    I was adopted from birth.
     
    And I don't care about that.
     
    Because I have amazing parents.
     
    But what I've always wanted, because of my TRUE INNER SOUL, for me being a protector of sorts...
     
    I have always wanted a younger sibling...
     
    But people tell me "oh you could probably find out who your bio mom is via [bla bla] and see if you have blood siblings...
     
    FUCK THAT...
     
    I couldn't bare it...
     
    Don't you understand...
     
    I would be totally crumbled...
     
    I would fall down LITERALLY to the ground and cry so much fucking harder than I ever have cried in my entire fucking life...
     
    ..............................
     
    My soul
     
    Is loving
     
    LOVING
     
    I HAVE
     
    So
     
    much
     
    love...
     
    And I wanted to give it to kin of my own, but I am an only child, an adopted child without siblings, of parents who grew up in a traditional country, Christian upbringing...
     
    I am so confused...
     
    I don't even know how I've written so much --- this has all been straight written from brain to finger on the keyboard of my laptop.
     
    But it's the TRUTH because I'm tired of living in a SHELL... I want others... I want to tell... I just can't hold myself inside myself like I always have anymore because I have two conflicting strengths fighting each other everday every second... one is my abilitlty to hide emotion and the other is the ability to SHOW it... HAVE it... FEEL it...
     
    And I'm tired of struggling to figure out which one is the real me because now I know who it is.
     
    It's the one that wants to BE OUT, and FEEL...
     
    I am amazed at my ability to keep writing with tear flooded eyes but God has given me this strength and I intend on utilizing it in it's UTMOST potential...
     
    I LOVE.
     
    And I want to love more than I know about myself already...
     
    I used to say that I hated change but that what when I had never left home...
     
    That was when I was back in high school...
     
    I told myself not to let college change my views BUT I AM SO GLAD IT DID.
     
    Because I needed this.... so much...
     
    Yeah, I broke down last night for unmentionable other reasons as well but this is different.
     
    I just needed to finally, finallllllly LET GO. Let go of being AFRAID of progression and moving forward...
     
    It DOES make me sad to reminisce about the past, and my childhood, and my long lost friends who moved away that meant so fucking much to me I can't even explain in words...
     
    BUT now I have THIS place to finally TALK...
     
    I hadn't really ever TRULY let go until now... I don't know how I kept my feelings bottled... I reeeeally have no clue how... because this is so much and it really is coming from my SUBCONSCIOUS and right now as I have been typing, my CONSCIENCE is seeing who I am on the inside...
     
    I am sorry for all the caps locks and all the cussing... Really... I am so so sorry... I am not meaning to intend any of it as yelling; none of this was mad; it was all just pure and simple truth, and that in itself an emotion...
     
    Wow...
     
    Truth... As an emotion...
     
    Yeah, that's.... well I mean this... is the most hardcore thing I've ever experienced...
     
    ---
     
    I have no excuses for any of what I said... it's just the pure total truth... Blunt honesty, blunt truth, in the form of emotion... via typing from the depth of my core...
     
    I just needed to let it out...
     
    Wow...
    is all I can even fathom to think or say about it.
     
    Wow.
     
    ---
     
    Love,
     
    ~ Miles
     
     
     
  10. Miles
    Sometimes I get bored and have the urge to edit a song in Audacity...
     
    Of course this time around I edited the song "Trust" by Adema (it's one of my favorites).
     
    I boosted the bass, and made the instruments sound a bit "dirty" (rockers, you know what I mean)... I wanted to make it sound a bit more "grungy," and I think I did pretty good, too.
     
    This is unlisted because idk, lol, I guess I'm halfway trying to avoid copyright infringement, lmao:
     

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xz-0KP5l0_U
     
    Make sure to use HD
     
    (By the way - the intro starts soft but don't be fooled, it gets louder).
     
    ~ Miles
  11. Miles

    For Everyone

    By Miles,

    ---

    After I made this status, it hit me.

    A feeling that is very difficult to describe in words.

    Multiple things simultaneously ran through my mind. About how important this site, the show, and the fandom is to me. Just that feeling alone you saw in my status update about how much I loved seeing the MLG Forums banner, and even the Comic Sans text, was enough to kickstart these thoughts... (and sure it was funny but the reason is more than that).

    It's easy to see just how much the staff care about this site - and no I don't just mean because of the funny theme on April Fool's Day, I mean every day. And it is easy to see how much of a community we really are for each other. I love that. And I love MLP Forums so much.

    I've been a brony since late December 2013. I've been a member here since late June 2014. And I'll never leave. I want MLP:FIM, the fandom, and MLP Forums to continue to be a part of my life for years and years to come. It became a part of my life out of fortunate happenstance. And so I know that because it was serendipity that ultimately brought me here, and that it has led me to become a better person in real life... and of course, it has led me also to my current boyfriend , and we've been dating through Skype for 6 months now.

    ---

    Some others, if they were in the shoes I'm in now, might say something about what their life would be like right now if they hadn't found the show.

    Well, I'm not going to even ask myself that, because guess what, it did happen. And I couldn't be more glad that it did. I thank God for leading the way.

    I will, however, tell you one thing.

    Before I found the show I was falling. It was a bad time for me. First semester of my freshman year of college - Fall of 2013 - took a toll on my emotions. I am a very sensitive person, and I always have been. Leaving home to live in a dorm... *Sigh* Leaving home was the hardest thing I've ever done in my entire life. Now, I know that homesickness is natural, but let me give you a comparison to really show you what I mean...

    Three other friends from my small country hometown also chose to come to the same college as I did. Two of them barely showed any signs of homesickness at all. One showed a little - after about 2 weeks away from home you could tell that he was homesick, but it wasn't totally obvious.

    What about me? How long was I okay before it hit me? The first 3 days were okay. Soon as that weekend came around, it hit me. And since my roommate at that time was always out doing stuff with his friends, he was rarely ever there. So there I was. Alone in my dorm. And the homesickness grew slowly over time. There were times where it would fade away, but then a day or two later come right back, and not from the start - no, from the level it left me.

    Halloween was the most emotional time I ever had. To be completely honest, I should just say all of October was. Anyway, when Halloween rolled around, I sat in my dorm alone, watching some of my favorite old Halloween movies from when I was a little kid. So many tears...

    Then, Thanksgiving break wasn't enough time at home.

    And then once I came back to finish off the rest of December, that is what I was referring to above, when I said "I was falling. It was a bad time for me..." I actually began starting to feel numb emotionally. No emotions. No happiness nor sadness. Just numb. And it was growing. I think the best way to describe it was that I felt stale, and the staleness was increasing each day.

    Towards the end of December, what a miraculous Godsend did I receive...

    I'll leave out the irrelevant (to the point of this blog) story of how I found it...

    But I found My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. Curiously, and on the basis that I really didn't have anything else to lose by that time because of how down I felt, I sat down and watched the pilot episodes.

    Once I had watched them, I knew instantly that this was going to change my life. Though, I didn't know in what way, other than the obvious - that it would help to pull me out of the numbness, and fill my emotion center back up. My spirit was lifted.

    The truth about how it was able to do that for me is that it revived my inner child, and as well it brought out my loving side.

    For 6 months I kept it totally hidden. Nobody knew. And that includes online as well.

    Finally I had to find an online community to talk to people. So I found MLP Forums with a mere Google search.

    ---

    Flashing forward back to present time now...

    I can tell you with absolute certainty that nothing will ever pull me away from here, nor the show.

    I never really did adapt in such a way that I could consider my dorm room my "new home"... but with My Little Pony, and MLP Forums, that's okay, because now I can consider them my "new home."

    ---

    All of you... mean so much to me... and so I just want to thank you, and let you know, from the bottom of my heart, that I care dearly about every one of you. This site has given me more than I could have ever asked for.

    ~ Miles


  12. Miles

    Pinkie Pie's Jam

    By Miles,

    Hey Everypony!
     
    I thought I'd make this song into a video so I can share it with you. It's just a picture background (had to make it a video file to upload to YouTube).
     
    This is the elusive background song that I know many of you were probably wondering about.
     

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bkn8-AfFoCw
     
    Such a fun song
     
    I have the video as unlisted, more or less trying to avoid copyright issues, lol.
     
    ~ Miles
  13. Miles
    So... We all love the original... personally it's probably one of my favorite songs in the show. But, I wanted to make it better. I wanted to hear those beautiful voices even better. So, I took it upon myself to edit the song in Audacity... and I did it; I enhanced the clarity of their voices, as well as the instruments...
     
    Use 720p for best results!!!
     

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCESwvJ7US8
     
     

     
    I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!
     

     
    ~ Miles
  14. Miles
    Welcome to my first blog. Pleasure having you.
     

     
    I'm here to do a few things. The main point, actually, is for myself. The aftermath I want for you and you all to be able to use as guides for yourselves... in order to better your own mindsets, if either possibly troubled, or if even just fine, I am damn near sure that such a case that I will be laying out here, that such my own example, is something that can help you to feel better about yourself, whether or not you need it --- I just like helping others. It just so happens, I'm good at helping others by helping myself, and relaying the logic of the process to others.
     
    Anyway...
     
    Prologue:
    I am not of a distressed mind. I am not depressed.
    I am but only stressed. And, I am a nonchalant person.
    To be quite honest - blunt really - currently I am "pretty good."
    But I don't want that. I want to be... content. Now...
     
    I know there is no problem because I'm doing fine. I know there is no problem, because of the way my own personality is so structured as to disallow my self to become depressed. That is, in other words: due to my inherent diehard nature, in and of itself being bestly defined by the phrase I inherently follow - "If it needs done, do it."
     
    But, of course, there is obviously a reason to even have this blog. The reason is that I know I'm not content --- but I know just what do, or rather, knew just what to do: create this blog as a way to "logic through" my feelings and find the rationale I'm in search of.
     
    Therefore, though while there is no "problem" --- there is something to be done, and I need to do it.
     
     
     
     
    Pre-Body:
     
    If you know me at all... If you have seen my posts and/or statuses... If you are, and have been my friend here...
    You know me, and you how I am inherently: Honest, blunt, traditional, and yet, verbose.
    A convoluted contradiction may I seem on the surface, let me tell you I am really not.
    I try to be as clear and transparent as possible.
    And... I don't lie. I hate lying.
    Lol.
     
    Body:
     
    Currently I am a sophomore in college. I've grown up my whole life, except for the most recent college years, (therefore my first 18 years), in a small, country town in central Illinois.
     
    I used to be... a spitting image of that of which I now stride not to be...
    I used to be close-minded.
     
    I honestly know that I couldn't help that. Having been born a generation Y, but actually raised more like a generation X child due to having older parents (whom, my mother is now 60, my father is now 61 - and I'm now 20).
    And, mostly of course, due to the nature of small country towns. That is, that they are conservative by inherent nature - not necessarily politically, but rather, life-style-itically, if that makes sense at all.
     
    I am a Christian. But I used to be the kind that relayed the "air" of the stereotypically [bad] traditional style.
    I now am, I now have since become, different.
     
    Don't get me wrong - I love 90% of the style in which I was raised, which does, yes, include in itself, 90% of the style of religion as well.
     
    But... to repeat myself... I used to be the wrong kind of person. A bad kind of person. That is, close-minded.
     
    What does that mean, (if you care knowing, see inside the spoiler):
     
     
     
     
    How did I change? How have I rid myself of the negatives? In essence: How have I become open-minded?
     
    College, to be blunt. College - because it was a culture shock. I am not a big city person, and yet here I am functioning damn near perfectly in my sophomore year of college, in Springfield, IL; in which, comparatively to my hometown, I deem Springfield to be a very large city.
     
    My hometown was ... LOL... well, it was, and IS... basically to be blunt: hick.
     
    Corn. Cornfields. Everywhere.
    Surrounded by corn in all cardinal directions, for miles and miles and miles.
     
    A town of 2,500 residents, of which at least 95% being, including myself and my family, and friends...
    White.
    Country.
    Traditional.
    And corn. Lmao.
     
    And yet here I stand... in college as a sophomore with a current 3.87 GPA...
    as...
     
    A COMPUTER SCIENCE MAJOR!?
     
    Yes.
     
    I didn't see fit for myself farming. I didn't see fit for myself even... doing something related to cars. And that's crazy, because I'm a total gearhead, car-nut, Ford truck enthusiast.
     
    No... I like computers. I wanted to become a programmer. My goal upon graduating, upon getting a career... upon climbing the ladder... I want to become a Systems Analyst.
     
    And damnit, I'm gonna *apples* do it, too. It will be done, I will have it.
    ... in good time.
     
    But, ahhh... here comes the part you've all been waiting for - the reason for even creating this blog:
     
    Programming is hard. For me. I'm not inherently a "logical thinker" - not predominantly-intellectually a person who uses logic before feelings and emotion, and that is because I am an emotional person to the core.
    And I love that. It's amazing.
     
    And believe it or not - I'm actually introverted. I am in no way shape or form an extroverted individual.
    Talking; socializing with people in real life; is a grueling task, a trudging job. But I do it, because: "it needs to be done, so it is done; I do; I do, I do [it]."
     
    But I am very good with words, ironically. I loved English and Language Arts all throughout kindergarten through senior year of high school (and actually, especially high school).
     
    I was a band geek (trumpet player) from 5th through 12th grade; as well as in the same time period, I was a drama/theatre actor/singer/performer.
     
    My parents pushed me into other extracurricular activities. Of which I sucked horribly, lmao. Sports. Oh dear, I just couldn't perform in sports at all. I am a well coordinated person, but I'm not physically competitive, but rather only physically apt at doing things in which either I am actually interested in, or in which actually "need done." I didn't do Varsity sports because I just finally said "no" to my parents and put my foot down. Academics come first, and that was that. So, I broke them, and got what I knew was best for myself, was best for my education.
     
    And, to even further be annoying to you, I'll be redundant of things I've posted about: for the past 5 summers I've worked for my City under the Street Department, doing work such as: road patching with asphalt patch via shoveling by hand out the back of a ton-truck; digging ditches; painting curbs yellow; picking up fallen limbs and debris after storms; cleaning up streets of dirt and trash; cleaning off storm drains (as we call "catch bases"); and other tasks including changing oil and tires on trucks and tractors.
     
    And yet here I am, in college, as a computer science major. Wow.
     
    So what the heck is my point with all of this... what am I trying to accomplish with all of these words?
    I'm not content right now. I'm not content because I've found myself recently struggling in my college courses to perform at the level in which I know I'd ought to be capable. I worry and stress for my grades to be good because I have to: because I come from a pretty low income, lower-middle-class family, and my partial Scholarships require me to remain above a certain GPA to keep. I know it seems bad, possibly even greedy of me to be worrying about that... but that couldn't be further from the truth.
     
    You've got to understand that. We don't have much money. My parents basically live paycheck to paycheck. They both work their arses off. Dad works for Caterpillar - has to drive a 90 mile roundtrip each day to go the city in which is the locale of his job. Mom works for the elementary school, as well as a bank teller on Saturday mornings.
     
    We've been through alot of sh--. I cannot lie. We really have. But we keep on keeping on because we are set forth to do what needs done, and dammit, it gets done.
     
    I am struggling. But again I swear to you, I am not depressed - no, I am not. I am fine. I just need to talk things out because that's how my mind works.
     
    I did alright freshman year. It was *apples* easy compared [even] to the (so far that I've been) [a] sophomore.
    Sophomore year has arisen to me much more difficulty.
     
    And so I... because I know it needs done, I have to find a way to do just that.
     
    Which is why I am here.
     
     
     
     
    ...
     
    I know now after having typed all of the above... I have come to an "ah-ha moment"... of what and why I am struggling.
     
    Motivation.
     
    While being inherently diehard to "get things done" should make me already have a nearly infinite supply of internal motivation to just do, I've found it actually to currently be inadequate.
     
    Even though I am introverted, and that I am a diehard "do-er"...
     
    I need some amount of external motivation. It's just logical that I should. I mean, everyone does. It's just nature, it's just natural. We need something other than what is just inside our heads to push us.
     
    For the longest time, I was finding external motivation within music.
    I'm a rocker.
    I love rock music.
     
    "It's true the way I feel, was promised by your face; the sound of voice of your voice - fading on my memories, even if you're not with me, I'm with you."
    ~ Linkin Park...
     
    *wink*
     
    But... alas...
     
    Help. LOL. I need help here guys and gals.
     
    What am I looking for? How do I find some extra, external motivation, besides that of which I already do actually have?
     
    I don't know.
     
    And yet, I know I will succeed. Somehow. It will be done.
     
    I am strong. I am headstrong. I cannot be broken. I will not fall. I shall conquer.
     
    So, I know I will find it.
    I know I will wind up in the end here, getting through this mess.
    Successfully.
     
    I just needed to put all of this in written language; I needed to see these words.
    And because I inherently knew what these words would bring me, are also capable of bring others; I knew they would be able to help you.
     
    Even as I now haven't just yet gotten through it, I know these words have power within them.
     
    I know there are others out there in some kind of similar position, despite the dissimilarities...
    Who need help, too.
     
    For whatever this is worth...
     
    Stay strong and keep your head up. Don't let hardships bring you down.
     
    Make sure to prove that you can define your situation, and from it, understand what you need to do.
     
    Even if you don't know the answer, just giving a definition to the situation, and giving a definition to the question of what you need [to do] is going to be a big help in itself.
     
    Learn from your mistakes but do not --- I repeat --- do not --- ponder yourself into a mess of being consumed by the negatives, of being brought down to a state of being stuck.
     
    Learn from your past, but keep looking forward as you do.
     
    Keep looking forward, and therefore you will not fall into a state of being called "in-limbo" where you are stuck.
     
    You are amazing. You, are capable. You... will... succeed.
     
    Know it.
     
    Believe it.
     
    Believe.
     
    And you will get through. Anything.
     
    Epilogue:
     
    We are all amazing people, and we all have potential.
     
    I have found myself struggling, but I defined my situation, as well as the question that needs answered to "do" what needs done.
     
    Live, Life, Love.
     
    ~ Miles
     

     
     
     
  15. Miles
    Okay so, let me explain to you that I'm not just one of the folks who "says" they are an audiophile.
     
    My father is an Audio/Visual Tech Manager for Caterpillar currently. But, even before he was so lucky to get that title, he's been a DJ for over two decades (he's been doing it as an odd-job since before I was even born).
     
    When I was young, he sometimes took me to some of the parties he played music for. Over the years, he taught me about sound quality, speakers, distortion, ... just, everything.
     
    My own personal love for sound and sound quality has grown beyond just from what my father has taught me. I took it on my initiative to research sound reproduction; different types of speakers; limitations of certain sound frequency reproductions for certain speakers and distortion; etc.
     


    Now, of course I'm not naive; I know the songs I've chosen for this subject will indeed be affected by personal bias - but, nonetheless, I think you will understand.  
    Before I get to the list, I should explain to you some important details. The purpose of listing these songs isn't just because I like them, but that they have qualities in which I believe push sound equipment to certain limits. If the speakers, headphones, or earbuds you use to listen to them are not of high quality, you will miss the point. The point is that these songs have sounds, sound ranges, and backstages that may only be heard using higher quality listening devices.
     
    Also, though I bet you understand the implication, if you search for these songs and listen to them to test the quality of your listening devices, please make sure to choose high definition songs/videos, because if the bitrate of the audio isn't high enough, some aspects of the sound may not be present (may not be able to be heard - even with high quality listening devices). So, understand that audio files in which the bitrate is below a certain minimum (typically 320kbps is the min for qualification), you may not hear the aspects that audiophiles are referring to.
     
    Anyway, without further ado:
     
    --- *Disclaimer: Some songs in the list may have explicit language* ---
     
    My List (No Specific Order):
     
    Jamey Johnson - In Color
    Lights (Cover of The Who) - Behind Blue Eyes
    The Verve - Bittersweet Symphony (
    )
    Tre Songs - Bottoms Up
    Tool - 46 & 2
    Pentatonix - Little Drummer Boy
    Lynyrd Skynyrd - Sweet Home Alabama
    Disturbed - Indestructible
    Red - Let Go
    John Denver - Country Roads
    Trapt - Headstrong
    Eiffel 65 - Living in a Bubble
    Days of the New - Touch, Peel, and Stand
    Imogen Heap - Hide and Seek
    Adema - Trust
    Blue Oyster Cult - Don't Fear The Reaper
    Kansas - Carry On My Wayward Son
    Aerosmith - Dream On
    Owl City - Fireflies
    Ellie Goulding - Lights (Both the original & the Bassnectar remix)
    Jason Derulo - Talk Dirty
    Soulja Boy - Kiss Me Through The Phone
    Lil Wyte - OxyCotton
    Eminem - When I'm Gone
    Justin Timberlake - What Goes Around Comes Around
    Lumidee - She's Like The Wind
    Hybrid Theory (Linkin Park EP) - Part of Me
    Mudvayne - World So Cold
    Flyleaf - Fully Alive - *Due to there being multiple versions, I'm referring to this *
    Switchfoot - Meant to Live
    3 Doors Down - Behind Those Eyes
    Christina Aguilera - What A Girl Wants
    Rob Base & D.J. E-Z Rock - It Takes Two
    Run DMC feat. Aerosmith - Walk This Way
    Massive Attack - Teardrop
    Amon Tobin - At The End Of The Day
    ...
    I could keep going, of course, as the list is non-exhaustive...  
    But there's one more song I must list out of absolute necessity!
     
    And, I feel it's for the best to just post the video.
     
    My father's favorite song...
     
     
     
     
    I... get chills. And I get emotions...
     
    It's... a touching song. And it does indeed have great relevancy to testing one's audiophiliac senses.
     


    I hope there are other audiophiles such as myself out there. And I hope, too, that the song I posted touches your hearts, as it does mine, and my dad's.  

     
    Love,
     
    ~ Miles
     
    P.S.
     
    I made a status update before making this blog, in which I linked a pair of headphones that I do believe are very high quality - and, they are the ones I used to listen to these songs to judge their worthiness of being used as examples of the songs above.
     
    https://mlpforums.com/statuses/user/27651-miles/?status_id=679163
     
     
     
  16. Miles
    Disclaimer: The first couple sentences here started out as if I was just going to make a status update about this. Then, of course, I realized I had a lot to say. So, I decided to make a blog.
     


    Whoa. Uh... This is hard to describe, but... This song just gave me a sort of "situational nostalgia" - I remember listening to it a long time ago one night when I had insomnia. And this feeling I have... makes me kinda want to be able to remember what I was feeling when I had insomnia. Yeah, I know - that's weird. But, even though insomnia sucks, there's something ironically pleasant about the odd flow of neurochemicals after being awake for way too long. And as time goes on as you stay awake, feelings start to change.  
    Note: This might get confusing. Don't worry, it's not your fault. I tend to go overboard in my explanations sometimes. But just keep reading, the last part isn't so bad.
     
    For clarity’s sake; what is insomnia, in layman’s terms? The inability to sleep that causes you to stay awake. For some people, their insomnia is a repeating illness; legitimate, diagnosed insomnia. There are probably many causes of this, and so it may differ from person to person. For other people, insomnia is random. It doesn’t happen all the time. And then, all of a sudden it hits them.
     
    Discrepancy clarification: “Staying up all night” is not insomnia. If one chooses to keep him/herself awake, for whatever reason, but yet still retains the ability if he/she so pleased to fall asleep, that is not insomnia. Insomnia necessitates that one is under some kind of stress that disables them to fall asleep. Insomnia keeps people awake that truly want to sleep, but cannot.
     
    I have the pseudo-insomnia, as it would randomly occur in college some nights. I wanted to sleep, but my mind and body just wouldn’t shutdown. Luckily I haven’t had insomnia for a long time.
     
    But anyway, as someone who has had… Oh, if I were to guess, I ‘d say around 10 to 15 instances of it in college in the past two years, give or take a little… I can tell you, (whether or not the insomnia is random or reoccurring), there is one good and one bad type of insomnia; this is because, there are two kinds of numbness sensations, one good and one bad.
     
    Here’s where stuff gets tricky. I can describe those two forms of numbness, but I can’t tell you which of the two is the good one, and which is the bad one. I’ll explain more about why momentarily.*
     
    One. The textbook, literal numbness – a lack of feeling and sensation. You can’t tell that you are numb because you can’t tell that you are not able to feel.
     
    Two. The paradoxical numbness – a sensation that mimics the normal numbness, except, you can feel it. Somehow you can feel a feeling that isn’t real; a pseudo-feeling.
     
    *The reason why has to do with the relations among “Mental/Emotional/Physical” states of being.
     
    Which category does insomnia stem from? Or, does it stem from multiple? How does it work?
     
    The answer is: it depends.
     
    Now, I will tell you that when you are stressed out, all of the categories are effected. However, there must be a special reason beyond stress alone to initiate insomnia. You can be stressed out in all categories and have the opposite effect of insomnia – a fatigue that makes you even more able to sleep because you have no energy. So you see, insomnia’s special reason for initializing is that something happens with the neurochemicals in the brain that gives you too much energy to be able to fall asleep, despite being totally exhausted. A reserve of energy that seems impossible because you think that you should be out of energy. You think you’ve used it all up. But yet, like magic, you just can’t fall asleep.
     
    With that being said, let me now dive further into speculation, based upon my own experiences.*
     
    *I’m not an expert; I’m not a doctor. I can only tell you how my own insomnia experiences have worked. Therefore, my explanations below may or may not be how others feel about their insomnia experiences.
     
    I’ve said there are two kinds of numbness, and I’ve said that the categories of “Mental/Emotional/Physical” are related in some way. I also said that this gets tricky to understand once you dive further into how it works…
     
    What exactly do I mean by that? A paradoxically reversed cause and effect.
     
    One of the kinds of numbness is caused by the physical category [via physical stress]. The other kind is caused by the mental/emotional categories [via mental/emotional stress]. Their effects are upon their opposites; physical stress causes mental/emotional numbness – and mental/emotional stress causes physical numbness.
     
    Now getting trickier: How do those two versions of stress-induced numbness relate to whether the numbness can, or cannot be felt?
     
    It is possible to only have one – it is possible to have the one other – and, it is possible to have both versions of stress-induced numbness at the same time. Yet, despite that meaning there are 3 possibilities, there are only two versions of insomniac numbness – good or bad.
     
    Remember how I said I can’t tell you which version of numbness – inability to feel, and ability to feel – is the good one, and which is the bad one? That’s because of this:
     
    3 possible instances of cause, but only two resulting effects…
     
    Therefore, we have a problem.
     
    1. Physical stress induced: Felt or not felt; Good or bad?
    2. Mental/Emotional stress induced: Felt or not felt; Good or bad?
     
    3. Both physical and mental/emotional stress induced: Felt or not felt; Good or bad?
     
    And so, in order for me to be able to tell you for certain which version of numbness I originally referred to when I said I have situational nostalgia – the one that I like (ergo, the good one) – I would have to figure out this:
     
    If A. 1 and 2 are felt; if B. 1 and 3 are felt; if C. 2 and 3 are felt; if D. only 1 is felt; if E. only 2 is felt; if F. only 3 is felt.
     
    That is 6 cases. Only one case may be true – the rest must be false. And, each case has an unwritten inverse truth – that the numbers (1 through 3) not described in that case are not felt.
     
    Then, I’d have to figure out if that one true case is the case I am referring to as the good one, or if it is the bad one.
     
    Do I think I can figure this out? Maybe.
     
    But to do so, I can tell you right now that I would have to take a shortcut based on a mere whim, and that I would be figuring out the above questions through backwards logic – finding the answer before the question, rather than after.
     
    My whim is this:
     
    I know that during both instances of insomniac numbness, I am either functioning consciously, or I am “autopiloting” – ergo, functioning subconsciously. (Functioning as in, being awake).
     
    I believe that the good version of insomnia is where I am conscious, and thus not autopiloting. Therefore, I believe that the version of numbness that is good (because it is the effect of the good version of insomnia) is the version of numbness that you can feel. The pseudo-sensation of numbness that can be felt; can be perceived. Hence, the version of numbness that is bad is that which cannot be felt; a lack of feeling.
     
    Why do I think that?
     
    When one is conscious, one can feel. When one isn’t conscious – when one is subconscious (“in autopilot”), one cannot feel.
     
    I think that the good version of insomnia is where you can feel the pseudo-numbness because I know that whenever I have had insomnia, there has been a predictable pattern of consciousness; a predictable pattern of subconsciousness. The pattern is this: As time goes on while one is staying awake due to insomnia, one continues to use up sources of energy to remain conscious. Once those sources have gotten to the point where they are near depletion, one slips into the state of his subconscious. The brain causes this “slip” from being conscious to being subconscious because it is trying to keep you… alive. Yeah. I know. That’s a scary thought. Insomnia disables one from sleeping, and once a person becomes deprived of sleep long enough, the mind/body starts using alternative sources of energy to stay not only awake, but to stay alive.
     
    Additional information: Normally, there are certain neurochemicals that flow during wakeness, and then there are certain ones that flow during sleep. In a healthy person that is not suffering from insomnia, the neurochemicals for wakeness will stop flowing when the neurochemicals for sleep start flowing. Basically, if one switch is on, the other is off. This may be a surprise to you, as you may have figured there was only one switch that if on it meant awake, and if off meant asleep, but that isn’t so. There are two switches, and that is what enables insomnia to exist. Remember, when I say “switches” I’m referring to the flow of wakeness and of sleep neurochemicals. Insomnia occurs because the wakeness “switch” doesn’t turn off when the sleep “switch” turns on. Insomnia, therefore, means both switches are on. And thus, as time goes on, insomnia can eventually turn into a state of being where one feels as if one is both awake and asleep at the same time. When that occurs, one is functioning subconsciously “in autopilot,” and that means one’s overall health is greatly at risk. It is quite possible that a person could suffer some substantial issues if sleep cannot be had soon once the “slip” from conscious to subconscious occurs.
     
    Luckily, of all the times I’ve had insomnia, only a couple have I went into the subconscious, “autopilot” mode. And even then, I was able to fall asleep quickly enough after that to save from having health issues.
     
    Well, this was a long ass blog. Lmao. Thanks for taking the time to read it, if you got this far. If any of you have similar feelings; or if any of you have had insomnia before, please comment your thoughts on what I’ve said. I’m interested in seeing what you have to say.
     
    Thanks,
    ~ Miles
  17. Miles
    *Read this intro before you look at my list*
     
    Alright, how do I even begin...
     
    When I first set forth to make this blog, I had wanted to make a Top 5 favorites list, just like Rivendare did, here.
     
    I realized I couldn't just choose 5 songs, because there are way too many songs I love from the show. Now you may be thinking, "Oh, it's because he's indecisive..." --- But you couldn't be more wrong. It's because I'm too decisive, and stubborn. And, also because if you analyze my favorites, and the order I place them in, you'll see a pattern that you can derive a meaning from...
     
    I'll say this now, my list of favorites may come as a shock to some of you.
     
    *Disclaimer: Most people would start from the bottom and make their #1 favorite be at the end of the list, as a build-up. I am not doing this. I start from my #1 favorite because it's easier to write about what you like the most... However, despite how verbose I may usually be, I might find it hard to write much for the rest of the songs.*
     

     

    This picture is only here to make sure you can't take a sneak peak at my list before reading the above intro.


     

     

     
    Miles' Top Favorite MLP:FIM Songs:
     
    1.
     
    When I watched the Season 3 finale for the first time, and this song came on... I was in tears so much that I could barely see the screen. The song is beautiful, and the way they showed clips and pics from previous episodes makes this song even better.
     
    It builds up what I like to call this "Brony Nostalgia" by showing you memories from past episodes.
     
    But the number one reason?
     
    As a college student... I know what it's like to experience homesickness.
    But even more so, I know how my parents missed me being home.
     
    Celestia may not have been Twilight's parent, but the feeling is all the same, because Twilight was her special student for a long time. The bond that Twilight felt with Celestia was as strong as any...
     
    And Twilight was growing up. Becoming something that she never thought she could even dream of being.
     
    ---
     
    I don't care that some people didn't like Twilight's Alicornification, because I liked it, and I found a special meaning that I could connect to my own life.
     
    Leaving home... ... was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life.
     
    Celestia's Ballad is a beautiful song to begin with, but when attached to the meaning it can connect to with my own life... it's just that much more special.
     
     
    2.
    // I've Got To Find A Way [Extended] 
    Surprisingly, though you'd think I might place this here for having a connection to own my own life again, but nope. I just think this song sounds as if it could be a legitimate song; something that someone who didn't know about MLP would have no idea that it was connected to the show.
     
    The way she extends out the "why" (or the "try" in the extended version) is just amazing.
     
    Also, in the original version, the way the colors were faded out... that was excellent. It made the song have more emotional pull.
     
     
    3.
     
    I was crying the whole time the first time I saw this in the Season 4 finale because, even though I knew it wasn't --- it felt like it had the potential to end the whole series. And even when I consciously realized that it wasn't, I then saw the point the song made...
     
    Damn. We've been through a LOT of episodes. We've watched the ponies grow up together. We've seen them make memories with each other...
     
    Some people might think of the Season 3 finale in this way, but I see the Season 4 finale as being a sort of... peak, or climax, or breaking point/turning point in the story.
     
    Why? Because now she's a princess with a purpose. No more wondering what she's meant to do. She now knows that her purpose has actually been exactly what she's been doing the whole time! So, that's why I see this as "The End of The Beginning" and thus, Season 5 will be the start of something different, in a good way.
     
     
    4.
     
    This was just one episode before the Season 4 finale, and thus, came before "Let The Rainbow Remind You." I kind of give it some of the same meaning, except this song is while Twilight is still searching for her role as a princess.
     
    Also, hearing all the alicorns sing together was just totally awesome.
     
    I can't tell you which one I like more (in terms of singing)... but I can say that I love how unique Cadance's voice is on the word "belong!"
     
     
    5. Hearts Strong As Horses
     
    The placement of this song in my list may come as a surprise to some... or someone... ehem, but don't think of it as being lesser than the songs above it; think of it as those songs having more of a special meaning to me.
     
    I love this song so much! It's so energized and triumphant sounding. The CMC's all do a great job singing, and this has always been one of my favorite songs from the first time I heard it.
     
     

    Because of the fact that this was originally meant to be a Top 5, I am not going to write anything for numbers 6 through 10, and I am going to label them as "Honorable Mentions"...
     
    Why not just have the Top 5 and not list 6 through 10? When have I ever been know to fall in line with common boundaries!? Haha... Consider them proof that I can be decisive. I'm just not going to write about them because I don't really have much to say other than that I like them alot, and that the order I put them in really is how I feel.
     
     
     
     

     
    Honorable Mentions:
     
    6.
     
    7.
     
    8.
     
    9.
     
    10.
     

     
    Well, that's all for now!
     
    Thanks for reading my blog!
     
    Honestly,
    Miles
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