Blitz Boom

@Illiad Easle

At the time, you hadn't really given that many details about Troy, so I just made up the name of a place. I'll edit in the name you mentioned instead then, and will consider this as having happened before said revolution. It was 15 years ago, so there was ample time. As for the cult... Eh, I like to think more of a bunch of disgruntled, hateful ponies that had until then just spread badmouthing about the sisters, and some corrupt officials. There's always some, and unfortunately, in certain areas, those beings tend to gather with others that share their view. Enough to make it seem as if nopony wanted anything good for them, and with others not raising a hoof against it.

In regards to what is glorified, science may be the most important, but magic play a good part too, otherwise anti-magic wouldn't be too big of a deal. I'll rephrase the word glorified though.

On 5/15/2018 at 3:34 AM, Pr0m4NV14 said:

For some reason, there are a lot of </p>s and <p>s.

 

I had a talk with one of the mods about this after the forum had the massive update around a half year or so ago. The random signs there comes in with certain symbols being put into the chat, though it's mostly through paragraphs. From what I could gather from their response (as well as what I have seen on other forums) it's a formatting issue that is only present on the character pages. As you can see, they have yet to fix that.

As for the character itself, I like the concept, yet you say he have a legendary blade. What makes it legendary? Furthermore, what in his upbringing exactly, makes him against royalty?Even being outside of regular society, it doesn't automatically mean that he should despise the idea of a monarchy. A suggestion there could be to say that in his area, they had an elected leader, and he thinks that should be the same for the rest of the country too. A little low brow, but it would cover it.

She is inspired by Liliana Vess, that's correct. Wondered how long it'd be before somepony caught it.

I ttied going my own ways after tge basics though. For example, Vivid doesn't know necromancy. Best she haves is some soul magic, but that's mainly from taking in residual energy of the souls she helps along. Sometimes it's needed to drain the more violent sorts to help them along, and that stuff stacks up.

She doesn't use it offensively though unless there is no other choice or she looses it a bit, and outriggt necromany actually makes her furious. She thinks you should respect the dead, not defile them with heresy.

Yeah, I've been talking with a site manager about it, and they're trying to fix it, but are having issues finding out what exactly is the problem.

He ian't mind wiped really. He remembers his old world, the things in it, etc.

When Happy turned though, he got a little crazy in it, and combined with a darker side he tended to just keep hidden normally, he were susceptible to bending his knee for a creature that knew what to say, and feed the persception his crazed mind had that his new situation was a gift. He serves willingly, with full control of his own actions, and in his mind are indebted to his queen for bestowing him with power and a more meaningful life.

So yeah... Less mind wiping, more brainwashing and indoctrination.

And things like his wine making skills were things they'd figure out about him, and push to keep going. Gives him reason to be in the towns he goes too scout in, and gets a steady stream of bits back to his hive. I'm sure even changelings can find a need for that.

The queen likes to disguise herself and visit spa's for example. Or weaponry or something.

Also, getting a promising pony back to the hive is easier if they don't resist, and what do you know, poisoning their wine to make them pass out is an option now. :3

I wrote her in a hurry and never got back to fixing her. Appearance needs some more details, but waiting until the bio format is fixed before going at it, or it will just be an even bigger mess.

And I know that eye injuries doesn't work that wat, but I might have worded it wrong then. Meant that she got a slash over her face that cut up her eyelid and that size of her face peetty good, but hee eye is fine. Just that after a long time of getting exposed to no light it got sensitive, and she figured that it was something worth cultivating for attacks in the dark, where it'd have an easier time adjusting to the shades and slight movements. Things like this is what I need to add when the time comes.

Also, medics at the shrine were basically field ones like you'd find in older war movies. Surgery was there a bit, but with the eye it were too sensitive for what they could realistically do without outside help, and they were supposed to stay out of sight to most.

And no, she doesn't wear an eyepatch. Just her eye closed with an old scar going over it. More figther, less pirate.

Yeah, reading it over again, I have no idea what I was thinking. -,-' I toned it down, made it a bit more happy in it and made it unclear what happened with hers and Voids limbs. I'll go to her bios and correct things next.

I also addressed the suicidal part better, by adding in how she had to try and be tough for Void's sake, though as you can imagine, there's a lot of stuff rumbling under the surface with her after suppressing things all these years. Not just anger.

I figured I'd seen Angel be a hard one at times, so when I wrote Lotus in to give Nerzhei something in her life that she actually cared about, it just happened.

1. Dragons have varied sizes in MLP. The implied thing is that Nerzhei was large or her age when she was younger, but she doesn't grow as quickly as others might. She might even be in this size for the rest of her life. Also, a human size is fine for the purpose. I want her to be taller than ponies - the regular ones would reach to about her waist, with taller ones getting closer to her head, and the alicorn sisters being around her neck/halfway up her head - but still able to wander in towns without destroying things.

2. It does work if you look at the whole. Nerzhei was not a quick one in combat, she is written to have learned what she had to, but also having a lot of rage that she used to fight with. Mainly from being looked down upon all the time, and it helped her get out her aggression. When she learned to use that rage instead of letting it blind her, combined with magic and using her brain, she did better than those of her age around her, because again, they were stupid. A skilled fighter is not the same as a boar charging you.

Furthermore being any degree of strong or smart doesn't mean that others would want you. Disrespect for the ones above her and ignoring them at large so she can practice her magic and study will have consequences, plus once she got Lotus, she would just get more reclusive as she didn't want them to try and hurt her. Dragons eat tiny fluffy things, you know?

Also, consider that failing to socialize is on her too. Never said she were flawless, just that she became shunned. That one's on her reclusive nature and bad views on the others of her kin as it is on them. It works together to push them further away from one another.

3. I don't care about this one in the slightest really. I ain't English, so frankly I don't much care for the punctuation laws of the language. I put them in where it seems it's needed, or I can hear they fit, but beyond that I could not give less of a monkey.

P.S. Lisa Simpson is cool. For a disturbingly depressed child that is.

Easy to explain things here.

First off, the conversion process is what changelings can do in the comic. That is draining a being of all love, then convert them into a changeling.drone. Why it was done to her and how many others of where she lived isn't mentioned because quite frankly, it isn't needed information, and would just take away some of the questions that she even herself haves, as she have no idea who she really used to be.

As for why changelings does it, the comics explains that. No need for me to give spoilers. :3

The circus wasn't just her, but she were part of a *freak show* segment, and much as you might want to think that there's no pony that would want to see that, they have been depicted as having human characteristics, and that means there's some out there with the morbid fascination to watch it too.

Also, remember that changelings are not exactly well liked to varying degrees. Some ponies would just consider them monsters that tries to trick you, for example with false tears, or varying degrees of simply not thinking of them as normal, regular beings. More like wild, dangerous animals.

And remember, changelings can change form. Now add in one who can't control it and might end up looking more mixed than a draconequus, and you got yourself a show of What will she become now?*. You'd need to compare it to humans going to see a human who pops in and out of different forms for a real comparison, and a good deal of people would go see that.

A gritty look on things, but there's always a backside of the medal, even in this idealized world. Otherwise there wouldn't be any evil ponies for example, or prejudice at all. Which the first episode with Zecora clearly shows that there is.

The description is her point of view on Briar, which becomes evident if you take in his appearance and the fact that he haves vines, sharp teeth and closed eyes, whilst still being a pony. Seeing the two of them together in the RP should guide the curious eye and explain who she's talking about too, which I think is a fun little thing to see as they encounter her. Also, she were the only one in a cage in the circus that he heard cry, so he went for her specifically. Never said he didn't cause chaos by releasing the animals afterwards, as that isn't needed for Brittle's story. That's a bit of history that belongs to him.

Besides, if I gave a too detailed story on that in the bios of either of them, what would I have to tell those I meet in the RP? I do need conversation pieces after all.

I hope that explains things well enough.

Sad story, but an enjoyable read and a good character, that's for sure. I love it when the creators puts a little depth in the bios like this, and then expands on it with a good story that well explains why they are the one they are.

5/5, but could use more cowbell. heh.

I'd have to agree. A well written bios with an interesting character and a very impressive image to boot. You're gonna be a joy to RP with for anypony, for sure.

Also, big brohoof for making a zebra. Not enough of those around.

Thank you.

Spot on with that Ginger. I do thoroughly enjoy reading about this one too though.

Some good depth in the story whilst still leaving out a good deal to discover through RP, interesting personality, somewhat snobbish and sadistic, and the picture's good. All the fun parts.

Good job with this one mate.

A well done image of your OC, standing above a beautifully written, detailed personality chart, complete with flaws (A lot forget those, even though they are the most important. Adds depth and character) whilst still leaving room for things to evolve with age or experiences.

And on top of that, you have a well done backstory that makes a lot of sense, is interesting and really shows off her personality in all its glory.

I could say a lot of things about this, but I don't think any words would really do it justice. I will say though, that it's a work of beauty. 10/10.

Very cool picture. Haves some great emotions going, and fits what is written in the bios (Which is also good) You can be proud of this one mate.

Cool, Cupid himself is in the house. ^^ This seems like a Very interesting chap to get to know.

Daaaaang. Good story, excellent artwork, and finishing off with a classic Hamlet reference in the extra pictures? Totally awesome.

I like the attitude. i don't see that sort in bioses that much, and it adds some good flavour to this. Well done.

I like this bios too. ^^ It gets a strong, solid picture across about the character whilst still leaving holes for things to be added at random during RP's without breaking the base of the character, which is the sort of flexibility that I like to see in these things.

There might be a few cliches, but there is only so many times a story can be told before that happens, and that doesn't mean that it ain't some good reading after all. ^^

Also, points given for Children of the Night. I have that on repeat when I need to focus so I like anyone who draws inspiration from that as well.

Very nicely done. ^^

As one who likes to mess around with making their own spin on races on this forum, I must say that I really liked how you took a pretty basic idea of a half-dragon and made it into something more defined and with a good chunk or lore plastered to it that works well. Not too much lore, granted, but having some leeway to making up things about the customs down the line is part of the fun.

The description is good, his reason for being out in the world is solid, and the protective nature/wanting to keep at the very least her essence alive through her memory is a good touch, much like the fact that the name carries an actual, real world meaning.

This one will be interesting to see more off, I'm sure. :3

Good bios, interesting personality, and... Stuff...

I know I should say things in more details about how I like this, but by the gods, that picture... So pretty! It draws my attention in, a little away from the good base you have for your character and interestingly spoiled, double-moral way he are and act towards things. Those are good too, but... It's just so pretty.

Yes, the Halloween edition.

Cool, a Siren.

Far as I can tell there's not much that can be added here, and for a first attempt this is Very well made.

What she is, wants, true knowledge, good background without explaining too much so there's room for growth and random back stories, breaking points... There's plenty of good in here.

All in all, a good job. Solid 9/10 right there.

Looks like a solid bios, good information, leaving a lot up to the imagination and what you can come up with whilst going on. And I like the caffeine angle. Small quirks like that often gives a character the charm they need to shine.

And that picture... By the ancients it's nice.

Good background, descriptive meaning of the cutie mark and interesting quirk with a near.manic state of *Everything must be right* The latin names are a good bit of class to it as well, and the translation beneath just to help is well appreciated.

Overall, I'd say a good OC: .)