Kyoshi Frost Wolf

Nope and I don't care. Celebrities are garbage. 

Not much anymore. I often would like to think that the only point of it all is to enjoy things, big or small. To embrace the simple joys. To have passion for things, whatever it might be. Been learning over the years that things are designed to get in the way of all of that as much as possible, at every corner. So at this point, I don't know if there is any purpose anymore, for me at least. That ship sailed a long time ago.

You did all of these with MS Paint entirely? That's pretty damn impressive honestly. I can't do anything even 1% close to these and that's with Photoshop at my disposal. 

We aren't losing much. He's dedicated himself to pointless shlock for what, nearly two decades now? He's got his immense wealth and fame, he'll be fine. Like all other celebrities. 

Today has been one of those days that reminds me just how sad and pathetic my life truly is. 

Absolutely not. Got immensely sick of the "perfect Barbie doll" garbage of the original series. I doubt it would be any better now. Last thing I want anymore in MLP is the real world being a setting in any capacity. The real world has become very tiring and depressing. 

Nein! Ich habe kein Herz! Ich fühle keine liebe, ich fühle keine angst!

I own the game on Xbox but I could never properly get into it, no idea why. My brother and his girlfriend however have put tons of hours into it before, it was their main game for a good while. I love the music in it and its overall style, yet it never has quite pulled me in.

Fun fact: The development studio, Re-Logic, is located in my state, Indiana.  One of the only major studios in the state. Was a pleasant little surprised when I found that.

Fooooooooooooods

The past couple of years has made me realize exactly what my life is: Futile. 

While my life has been pretty stable for what it is worth, it has also been entirely stagnant. Uninteresting, mostly meaningless. There are things in my life that could be worse for sure, but I fear that over the next few years or so, the scale will start to tip horribly in that direction. I am not prepared for the future that awaits me. When all is accounted for, I am still very much a child in many ways mentally and this includes how I see things in the world, how I am able to handle what happens. This is not by choice, for if I had the choice I wouldn't be a useless dipshit. My brain is simply a battleground. So I try my best to just enjoy things in life, the simple joys, but that's become so difficult.

You know how some people have a midlife crisis? I've been having what I call a quarter life crisis. I am only 29 yet I feel that my feel is already halfway over. Realizing that time is flying by, seeing people age, watching people die, it has all been hitting me like a train these past two years. I know full well that this is shit that is inevitable and everyone has to just deal with it, but I am not built for this stuff. I can't handle it. It makes me terrified of losing someone truly close to me. Beyond that, I have zero aspirations because I struggle just enjoying my life as is. I can't drive, I have near constant anxiety and thoughts of depression, self hatred and other things and yes, this is while I am on two medications as well. I just want to be happy but then I realize that the goal of life is not happiness. It is to be part of the machine, to be grinded into dust for the system. I am useless to that system so I have no real point of being alive. I make my stupid banners and whatnot but that doesn't justify my life, if what we see in real life is anything to go by. It is all about money and I will always be lower middle class and eventually just lower class. This is not counting my constant fear of disease, of pain, of going to any medical facility for fear of finding out something terrible. Meanwhile friends and family simply move on without me as that truly is the better choice. I am a liability. The world moves on, time goes on, regardless of how I feel. Inevitability. 

I am rambling at this point but I am simply scared of life and what it holds for me. When I was "younger", I could live in ignorance and just enjoy my video games or simple walks or whatever. Nowadays, I am constantly reminded of my impending doom, of my uselessness to the world and how it will come crashing down on me eventually. I know not of what to do about any of it, I'm just a scared child in a 29 year old body. 

So....yeah. My life sure is a life, I suppose. Frankly, I just want someone to kill me now and get it over with. I would highly prefer death at this point.

I have nothing to be proud of. No accomplishments, no value, no purpose. 

Unless not being dead counts. In which case yay for me. 

I sincerely do not care about a bunch of "celebrities". Celebrity worship culture is a poison. A show like this doesn't actually gain anything from signing some overpaid person like Dwayne Johnson, other than the typical "celebrity exposure" that everyone loves so much. No point in trying to get these people when they will ask for way too much money because they think they are kings deserving to be lavished with gold. To hell with that. 

I'm not satisfied, but I'm done apologizing
No more compromise, no more compromising
So go on, criticize, cause I've done the best that I can
I know I'm doin' fine, I don't really care what you think!

I got nothing to prove
I got no one to please
I do what's best for me!

My Little Pony: Breath of the Bay. This game sounds painfully generic, sadly. Sounds like a lot of "girl ponies doing typical girl things". I want to see boundaries broken, not upheld. 

Mostly just depressed, empty, lifeless. 

This is the end
The malice sealed with a kiss of bitterness
From the mouths defiled spoiled within the lifeless populace
Poisoning by way of rapturous tongue
The exit sign dressed in blades of razor
The trigger of a loaded gun

This is why I hate ""celebrity"" voice actors for things like this. They often want way too much money for something any random person could possibly do just as good, if not better. "Celebrities" are often overpaid and over-privileged. Starting with them for any series is a terrible move because you simply won't be able to keep them, most likely. If this culture would stop worshipping celebrities like gods then perhaps corporations wouldn't see it as a go-to marketing ploy, just like the upcoming Mario movie. Stop hiring a bunch of self absorbed celebrities as a tactic to put asses in theater seats. 

TESTING!! AHHHHHH!! TE-TE-, DO YOU READ?!

I’m a wall street criminal
I got gold man sacks
Just a thief
Robbin' you to the max
I’m government sanctioned
And government backed
The dice are loaded
The deck is stacked
Misery is money
And business is booming
Lottery for losers
The axes are looming
Depression is dollars
And pity is pennies
A market for suckers
The bookies are winning
Still selling free trade
As the path to salvation
A shellgame enshrined
Through corrupt legislation
Our long term loss
For their short term gain
You can have hope
But don’t expect a change
We lost it all
But who gives a shit
Stupid Americans
Still give us a gift
Don’t pay no tax
On my free trillion fifty
My friends at the SEC
Yeah, they got me
Still haven’t caught on
To what this is 
We loan it back
Now we’re back in biz
Scam you once
Maybe bad luck
But every decade
You’re stupid fucks
Somewhere out there Malthus is smiling
As we lay waste to resources through all our coniving
Over-indulge in consumer yearnings
Life is more than quarterly earnings
A ponzi scheme
Casualties of commerce
Another bubble is growing
Every breath makes it worse
Capitols are corrupt
And the brokers are breaking
Equity is envy
You give what they’re taking
Too big to fail?
Too corrupt to care
End corporate welfare

GahDAM that song is so good. Love it. 

Why must the human race be so incredibly shitty?

On 2022-02-20 at 12:52 AM, Sturmponiere said:

 

Every time when I'm trying to say something to support you, I get banned. So...

*This comment could help you, or just amuse, but it's not political correct enough to new standards of speech*

But anyway, wipe your tears. Be a stallion, for Heaven's sake.

None of my efforts ever seem to amount to anything. Eventually that takes its toll. Things across the world are only getting worse anyway. 

The more I've thought about Nintendo's offerings in the Direct, the more weary I feel about it. 

This would explain why the Mario Kart courses are so cheap, which should have been a red flag right away. Now, it still is a lot of content and it still will likely be decent, but make no mistake that this is a cash grab in the end. 

Switch Sports having only half the sports of Resort at launch (Resort is 13 years old) is a bummer too. I am frankly so done with this release strategy of "Let's launch an incomplete product intentionally so we can fill the rest in later!" This same problem is why I am immediately questionable about Mario Strikers. Tons of people lost their stuff when that appeared and I get it, but they all seem to forget that this is (I assume) Camelot making it and the they have had a really rough track record lately. Mario Tennis Aces was fun but launched with little content. Mario Golf Super Rush was a massive downgrade for the series with dumbed down gameplay, lack of polish and again, barely any content. All so they can go full "live service" and give us the complete product down the line. It doesn't sit well with me. 

Theres still a lot of great things on the Direct absolutely, but as for Nintendo themselves? They are lacking, hard. 

Feeling seething self hatred. I wish my reflection would smash my face in. 

My brother's girlfriend had it, my mom, my step dad, my sister, my nephew, and friend of mine suspects he had it but he isn't sure. I've not gotten it, luckily. My usual seclusion has its benefits.

Basically...not entirely. Could be worse, could be better. The walks I've been doing are helping a bit though I think. I walk around town wearing a 20lb weighted vest while carrying a 10lb weight in each hand. It gets brutal.