How are you?

[Davey the second 12]

So I know I said I wasn't gonna post again, but then I got really bored. So I logged back in. How are you guys doing?

Edited March 1 by Davey the second

[Snoopy Fan 2,425]

I’m doing fine, thank you for asking.

[SharpWit 2,747]

My heart is heavy today.

Spoiler

You become accustomed to loss in the animal care industry. It never gets easier, but having a better understanding and knowing the time is right can be helpful. Proximity is another factor. You can stand at the ready, remaining stoic for the task at hand, witness someone experience the worst day of their lives, but when it's your own or a friend, it's not any less difficult.

Yesterday I said goodbye to a friend. She was a wonderful patient. Good for all of her exams, sweet as could be. She'd been dealing with lung cancer for 3 miraculous years with minimal growth or symptoms.

Spoiler

About 2 months ago her condition started to change. The growths in her lungs had increased in size, and she had a noticeable cough when exerting herself. She was more easily short of breath, and began to lose control in her back legs as well. Not that she seemed to mind. One hand to help her along was always followed by one to scratch her head. A little over two weeks ago, she started exhibiting other neurological symptoms, and her lymph nodes had increased substantially in size. The cancer had spread. We always knew this would happen, but after so long we'd put the thought out of our minds to some extent. Time was always ticking, but the top of the hourglass was suddenly quite low.

Yesterday we found that the lymph nodes in her neck had grown large enough that they were affecting her ability to eat, and her legs were giving out often enough that she would need constant care and supervision. Her time had come.

Normally my girlfriend, who was her primary vet would've gone through with it then, but only the mom was present and she wanted to give her dad a chance to say goodbye and spoil her for one more night, so she was scheduled for today. My girlfriend and I have the day off though, so we weren't present.

The time and regard for this patient with the lengthiness of such a condition place her in a very special place for us. I don't know if it's just that, or if knowing what was to come and not being a part of it make it,,, worse.

Helping her into the car one last time made it a different kind of goodbye. Final, yet not. Sometimes they come in smiling for that last visit, but them smiling as they leave usually isn't my last memory of them.

One of my nick named titles at work is the King of Cremation. We're not actually involved in any of that, but I prepare the vast majority of them to make that eventual journey. It's hard sometimes, but I find solace in carrying the crown, carrying them.

Her parents still have her two brothers. One young enough yet to know what the ball is called, and the other senior enough to think he doesn't deserve to have it if he can't fetch it by name.

I will remember her fondly, and fill the void with happy thoughts, good food, and fluffy hugs.

[Davey the second 12]

Life is full of such lows and highs. I hope she is happy wherever she is right now. (Heaven, I'm assuming. Or wherever good animals go.) I remember a part from the book wonder. August has a run in with kids who are in like the 7th grade. He's pretty shaken up, and when he gets back to where he normally was (Idk some kinda trip thingy outdoors with all the other kids) he says that a horrible day for him could be a boring average day to another person. I had the most boring day today and yesterday. I had no clue you went through that. 

Edited March 2 by Davey the second
Idk