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About this blog

Where I talk about all the stupid stuff that annoys me.

Entries in this blog

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Episode 133 - Kraydoze

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When people mispronounce Kratos's name.  Y'know, from God of War.  They get lazy and slur it, turning the t into a soft d, and the s into a z.  "Kray-doze".  "Kraydoze".  Drives me friggin nuts.  You have to annunciate a hard t and distinct s.  "Kray-tose".  Say "kray", then pretend you're going to say the word "toast", but leave the last t off.  Kray-toas.  Not Kray-doze.  Not Crate-O's.  Kray-toas.  Toas.  Not Doze, not O's.  TOAS.  Kratos is the bade
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Episode 132 - Zero Punctuation

hey yknow what really grinds my gear when people dont use any punctuation marks whatsoever like wtf are you even kidding me like am i the only person on the face of the planet who has heard of punctuation marks you would not believe how many posts i see on the internet that have absolutely no punctuation marks and the entire paragraph will be one giant run on sentence it makes it so hard to read and figure out their intention its so ridiculous like i am the only person in the world who passed en
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Episode 131 - Do This Really Hard Thing in 5 MINUTES!!

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Clickbaity youtube videos that always say, "How to do this really hard thing in X minutes!"  You know what I'm talking about--it'll be like, "How to build your own gaming PC in 30 mintues!"  "How to configure your own open-source wi-fi router in 15 minutes!"  "How to make this ultra-realistic 3D model in Blender in 25 minutes!"  Yeah, most of these sorts of videos that I see are tech related cuz that's what I do.  But it could also be, like, um... "How
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Episode 130 - Falling in Water

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  The ridiculousness of characters falling into water on tv and movies. Movie/TV laws of physics: Fall from literally any height and land in deep water, at any angle, and be perfectly fine.  Surface tension does not exist.  Take no damage.  Fall off a cliff, unconscious, plunge 2000 feet, land in water, wake up on the shore, happy as a clam. Actual laws of physics: Falling into water from higher than about 20 feet and landing wrong (i.
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Episode 129 - More Foreign Stuff on Netflix

Hey. This is a sequel to Episode 81.  Quick recap--I hate reading subtitles.  Nothing against foreign stuff, just a slow reader, can't do it.  It really GMG that Netflix doesn't make it more apparent when something is subtitled and not in your region's native language.  I want to be able to tell at a glance. But y'know what grinds my gears even more??!  When you actually take the time to scroll down, click on "audio", check to see if subtitles are on or off, and they're off, then you scroll
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Episode 128 - Nacho Cheese Sauce

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When restaurants list "cheese" on an item but it's actually nacho cheese sauce.  Look, I'm not necessarily averse to nacho cheese sauce.  I typically only like dipping chips in it without any other ingredients, but the point is that if it's sauce then it should say sauce.  If I order nachos that say "topped with ground beef, lettuce, beans, and cheese", then I expect CHEESE.  GRATED CHEESE.  Not f*ckin' sauce.  If it says cheese then it should be cheese
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127. The Number of This Episode.

My gears. Y'know what really grinds them? When characters separate out either the subject or object of a sentence and move it out in front as a lone fragment in an attempt to sound more dramatic.  This is one of those things where you probably have no idea what the f*ck I'm talking about until I give an example.  This is where, instead of asking, "Where did you hide the money?", the character will say, "The money.  Where did you hide it?"  Or instead of, "You must not trust Mr. Smith",
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Episode 126 - Online Games

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Getting online gaming to work. Gaming graphics continue to surge forward to unfathomable new heights while netcode just seems to rot away in a dumpster.  Why is it that no matter how much progress we make, no matter how sophisticated games become, no matter how fast internet connections get, and no matter how powerful computers get, simply getting a lobby of your friends together in an online game and playing for a couple of hours without issue is
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Episode 125 - Inching Out Before the Light Changes

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When drivers stopped at a red light take their foot off the brake and start coasting out into the intersection, inching their nose out before the light turns green.  I hate this behavior so, SO f*cking much.  WHY DO YOU GOTTA DO THAT??!!  WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO F*CKING IMPATIENT??!!  It's not gonna get you there any faster!!  Do these ding dongs actually think that they're saving tons of time??  IT DOES NOTHING!!  Why can't you just chill the f*ck out
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Episode 124 - "Breakfast" Foods

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  "Breakfast" foods.  First off, for some odd reason, I hate all traditional American breakfast foods.  It's so weird that I would hate all of them, but it's like someone put some kind of curse on me where it makes me hate any food that is universally agreed upon to be traditional breakfast food.  So, I'm talkin' about waffles, pancakes, eggs prepared in any way other than hard-boiled, ham, bacon, sausage, hash browns, etc.  I can kind of tolerate some of
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Episode 123 - ...

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?   ... ... ... um... uhh... ... ...gimmie a second...   ... mm...  um.... Dammit.    I forgot.  It'll come to me in a second...  uhh... shoot....   Can't remember.  I guess I'll let you know if I think of it. ...   OH YEAH!!  Just remembered!  I f*ckin' hate it when you had something you were about to say, and then you suddenly forget it!    Or you walk into a room to do something and suddenly forget what
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Episode 122 - Bowling Pin Sound Effect

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When they throw in the bowling pin sound effect every f*ckin' time something or someone gets knocked over.  They do it SO much.  I mean, sometimes it'll be the most serious show or movie, it'll be f*ckin' Lord of the Rings, and, like, the Riders of Rohan will plow into some orcs and knock 'em over and they'll make the f*ckin' bowling pin sound.  Okay, maybe they didn't actually do it in LOTR, but they did do a Wilhelm scream or two.  Anyway, the bowling
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Episode 121 - Finding Out a Name You Knew is Wrong

Yer like.... what??  The hell??  Yeah, I'll explain. Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When you see a longtime, beloved fictional character's name written down for the first time in your life and suddenly realize that the name you've known for your whole life is wrong, that you've been mishearing and mispronouncing it for decades. I recently wrote a blog about how the X-Men were a beloved childhood favorite of mine.  I always believed that Storm's real name was "Aurora Monroe".  Pat
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Episode 120 - Fairy Tale Episodes

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Episodes of shows where the characters play other characters in some story that didn't happen and doesn't serve to further any plot or character development.  I'm talking about episodes where they contrive some reason for one of the characters to tell a story (like the power going out), and then they proceed to read some fairy tale where each of the characters from the actual show are reimagined as the fairy tale characters in a one-off story that serve
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Episode 119 - Seasonal Fashion Trends

Hey.  I'm a huge fashionista.  Like Rarity.  I love fashion.  But y'know what really grinds my gears?  Seasonal fashion lines and fleeting trends. I'm not just talkin' about "new" clothes.  I'm talkin' about when the fashion industry puts out new seasonal lines, and the media/celebrities/whoever tells us that last season's [perfectly good] fashions are now "out of style".  This is just planned obsolescence to squeeze more money of out you, and it's contrived garbage bullsh*t.  Let me let yo
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Episode 118 - Whatever Doesn't Kill Me...

Feel like I'm gonna take some flak from all the optimists for this one.  Meh.  Whatever. Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  The saying, "whatever doesn't kill me only makes me stronger."  Um... yeah... with some obvious exceptions.  How about muscular dystrophy?  How about osteogenesis imperfecta?  Epidermolysis bullosa?  Polio?  Varicella Zoster?  How 'bout cancer?  How 'bout a paralyzing spinal injury?  How about friggin PTSD?  How about f*cking long COVID?? How about f*ckin'
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Episode 117 - Sneezing

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Sneezing.  Oh, damn, does this one grind my gears to a f*cking halt. I sneeze more than most people.  I don't have any specific, acute allergies, just more sneezing than average.  I don't really mind sneezing too much, but it's the inevitable, annoying chore than comes afterward.  I absolutely cannot sneeze without then blowing my nose afterwards.  It is completely impossible.  Many a time I have tried to resist.  I'll sneeze and then sit there say
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Episode 116 - Sosal Security

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When people pronounce "social security" as "sosal security".  They slur it, y'know?  But I don't even understand it, because I don't think "sosal" is any easier to say, even when you're saying the term quickly.  Sometimes people even say "sosa security".  Drives me nuts.  Anyway, that's it.  Shortest GMG in history.   Okay, I'll give you a couple more.  I hate it when people pronounce "million" and "Williams" as "meen" and "weems". Okay,
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Episode 115 - "I just know."

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When a character in a movie... um... ok, so, like, y'know how in a movie, somebody's girlfriend/boyfriend or something is presumed dead, and then the person will be all like, "He/she is alive!"  And then someone else says, "how do you know?", and then they go, "I don't know how I know; I just know."  F*CK YOU.  You do NOT.  I HATE when they say that.  You don't know.  How can you?  You DON'T.  You just want them to be alive.  Now, I'm not talking about
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Episode 114 - Magic Superhero Outfit Transformations

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When superheroes or similar characters make outfits/costumes appear magically when that's clearly not part of their powers.  The best example that every here will know is when the Equestria girls use their friendship laser powers and it gives them all magnificent superhero costumes that look like they took Rarity months to design.  Why is that part of the power?  Makes no sense.  And how about good ol' Elsa making her dress during Let It Go?  She's Icem
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Episode 113 - "Technology"

Hey.  Y'know what really grind my gears?  When products advertise having some sort of "technology" when it's completely unwarranted just as a gimmick to make it sound cool.  Like, for instance, the ziplock bags we have in our cupboard boast having "power shield technology".  It's a plastic bag, you dipwads.  And my hand lotion claims to have "MVE delivery technology".  Or, say, a mop might claim to have "dirt locking technology", or perhaps a t-shirt will have "lint repelling technology", or a t
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Episode 112 - #1

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When commercials claim that a show or movie is the "THE NUMBER ONE SHOW/MOVIE IN THE WORLD/COUNTRY!!"  First off, what the f*ck does that even mean?  For a movie, does it mean most ticket sales?  In what time period?  For a show, does it mean highest viewership?  Highest ratings?  Sometimes I think that they just make this sh*t up for commercials.  I don't think there's any liability whatsoever.  I think that any advertiser is allowed to say that their
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Episode 111 - Reboot/Franchise Titles Pt. 2

One of my earliest entries was a rant about reboots that have the same titles as the original, which causes confusion.  This grinds my gears so much that it demands a revisit.  I hate when they give reboots or continuations in a franchise the exact same title as the original.  It grinds my gears so much that it burns my bacon, sizzles my sausage, steams my hams, bakes my beans, fries my flapjacks, boils my blood, and censors my clop.  What the f*cking hell, dude?  Why can't they give things a un
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Episode 110 - Prog

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Prog.  It just annoys me because I don't know what in the flying f*ck the word means.  I hear it constantly  I mean, I always assumed it was short for either progress or progressive, but that can't be the end of it.  I hear it in so many ways and in so many contexts that nothing makes any sense.  I mean, I literally don't know what part of speech it even is.  Is it a noun?  A verb?  Adjective?  Preposition?!  What?  I don't know!!  People use it like it
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Episode 109 - UI Changes Pt. 2

I already did an episode on UI changes, but I hate this so much that it requires a second part.  The hate cannot be contained. You know what really grinds my gears?  Unnecessary software UI changes.  Now, I realize that software needs to be updated and maintained.  I get that, and that's fine.  I also realize that sometimes UI changes are necessary and good.  I get that, and that's fine.  I still hate dealing with the changes, but I do in fact deal with it.  But what I can't f*cking stand i
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