Yeah, I know it. I've been very, very whiny as of late. I'm trying my best to cope with one of the most stressful weeks to any college student: finals week.

If you don't know about it or you're not in college (or university as they call it in Canada), finals week happens twice a year at the end of each semester. It's a very trying time, especially since college is usually like high school on steroids. On top of that, college students generally have to work, keep up their grades, and try to maintain a social life without going nuts. In fact, it's a lot like this

I need sleep. And good grades are expected of me. Thus, I haven't made many friends during my time in college. That gets quite depressing from time to time so I have to find ways to cope that don't involve drinking or self harm. I try to look for constructive ways to deal with it if I have the energy to do so. Like the other day when I walked 6 miles to take my mind off things. But today, I'm running on next to no sleep. I don't have the energy to do anything but whine and feel sorry for myself.

The problem is during finals week, you get a choice taken away from the triangle. You can only circle one.

Usually, finals aren't bad for me. I've only ever made a B on a final once or twice. I generally don't get test anxiety. This semester has been totally different. Seems like there aren't many things working out the way I'd like them to. And it's not the most loaded down semester I've ever done. I once took 20 hours in one semester and came out with 3 A's, 3 B's, and 1 C. This semester, I'm only taking 12 hours so there's no reason for me to have a C this semester. But I'm worried I'll get 2 of them after one very difficult final that I studied about 15 to 18 hours for and I don't think I did well on it, and another final for which I could only sleep 2 hours the night before taking it. I had to drink 6 cups of coffee this morning just to keep myself from falling asleep when I sit down. I've never drank that much coffee. Usually one or two do the trick. Any more than that, and I get shakier than a school bus on a bumpy road.

So yeah, I'm sorry if all my status updates as of late have been particularly whiny. I don't mean to do it. But it's the only way I've been able to keep my sanity over finals week. It's almost over. By next Monday, I should be returning to normal. Hopefully.