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Midnight Scribbler

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Blog Entries posted by Midnight Scribbler

  1. Midnight Scribbler
    This is another of my attempts at poetry. It went with a digital painting which I can share if you're interested. But here goes. This one is about how we change in our lives, grow apart from close friends, sometimes becoming less close. The unpredictable tides of life, and our struggle to fight for positivity in the face of negative odds over the brink of every wave on this voyage.
    -------------------------------------------------
     
    Welcome, my friend, to the ocean of chaos.
    Where dreams shatter and are born
    Where visions are vivid and fleeting.
    It is a scary place indeed
    And yet so empowering.
    I'd never intended for you to find me here
    Here in this state of being
    And I won't blame you for turning away, old friend
    For I am not who you once knew
    I cannot blame you for your changing view
    Things seldom stay the same out here
    In the bitter rain, and howling winds
    Upon the seas of chaos
    And once again, I bid thee fair well
    Though the skies are always changing
    Through thunder crack and lightning strike
    I send my warmest regards.
  2. Midnight Scribbler
    I was sitting one night, and found myself in a writing mood. Haven't done much in a long time, but here's one about light.

    Ageless it stirs,
    timeless it moves,
    lifeless it thrives.
    Within the emptiness
    between all things.
    Without form or face,
    mind or body.
    It sees all things.
    In absence
    we are blind,
    in abundance
    we are blind.
    Without it we are lost
    Within it we are found.
    Let there be light,
    let the shadows dance.
  3. Midnight Scribbler

    Tantibus

    By Midnight Scribbler,

    So some of you, who know me well, might know that I have recurring nightmares. If you follow my artwork, you'll see it there, and also if you've read my previous blog entries, I have mentioned it.
    My recurring nightmare is that of a shadow person, who follows me. The concept is much like the game Slender, if you are familiar with that character. It works in much the same way, except for me, it is very much real when I'm sleeping, and the one following me has no suit or features, its face is not white, it is just blackness. Its presence is like a physical manifestation of the worst things you can imagine, brought together in a roughly human shape, and composed of nothing but shadows. It inspires irrational fear simply at the sight of it, and the only instinct is to flee from it at all cost.
     
    My last dream involving this character, I was in a burning building. I remember trying to save someone, and I was in the last room before the exit. The walls were nothing but wooden pillars, wreathed and glowing in flames and embers. The fire by any realistic standard would kill me if I were to really be in something like that. But I remember feeling nothing, and the exit was completely dark, in unnatural contrast to the blazing room. The flames shot up violently and I stopped, seeing the doorway's darkness shrink into that familiar, haunting form. I knew what it was, but could not move, even though the building around me was burning.
     
    As horrific as this sounds, this dream, I consider a step of progress for me. This time, I didn't feel as much terror in seeing the thing at the doorway. This indicates to me, that I may be ready to face it, and now I actively search for it in my subconscious. I challenge it to come for me, so I can see it, and understand it. I feel now that I have chosen to confront it, it has less power over me than it had before.
     
    For anyone who got this far, thanks for reading. I think you can guess why Luna is my favourite character. I share a lot of her inner conflicts. And I consider myself, as my member title says, a dream wanderer.
     
    Anyone out there who suffers night terrors, sleep paralysis or recurring nightmares? I know how you feel, and I'd be happy to help anyone who has trouble understanding why these things happen.
  4. Midnight Scribbler
    Prepare yourselves for a lengthy entry. But I feel a lot needs to be said here.
     
    It has come to my attention that there have been some rather ill feelings among certain members of the staff, and the board of Poniverse. This has resulted in a couple of resignations, and a ripple effect which blew across the forums yesterday. Things seem to have settled, though there are still concerns on everyone's minds as I would expect, because in all honesty, there are some still on my own mind to some extent.
     
    As the events yesterday happened, I was unaware, and I didn't have the chance to see the threads before they were rightfully taken out of sight by staff. The threads, from what I understood were simply causing more problems than they were solving. A friend of mine saved the topic's main text to discuss with me, and sent me the information, minus any of the replies. So I had the chance to look over the threads that had been causing so much negativity. My response to this is simple. For most members of the community, this whole mess is already pretty well over. As for the internal issues, that need not concern anyone at the moment aside from the people who are working to run the forums. Those who volunteer so much of their time to bring us the community we all have enjoyed, some of us for many years now.
     
    The internal problems of a server such as this one, with such a complex assortment of things that require organization, moderation, public relations and technical maintenance, require a range of talents, and people suited for these positions. Now, regardless of the current situation some of you may be thinking of, these organizations are not immune to problems internally. This is the case for just about any like it. That said, the problems we have seen here concern only a couple of staff members. But as you can see, the ripple effect has caused a lot of negative response, and a lot of cold abandonment in people who have been with the forums for quite a long time. I feel that the actions of a few, have caused a very toxic environment for the whole, which isn't right, but this should not be something we look to worsen. Instead, this is something we should all try to assist in healing.
     
    A community of many can be very easily compared to biology. To put our situation in context, think of an organism, perhaps even your own physical body. If you get stabbed by a poisonous thorn, which breaks off and remains lodged in your arm.. what do you do? You remove it, and wash the wound to let it heal. The cells of your body converge on the poison and clean it up, and seal the wound like it never existed. The functions of the cells, that replace the thorn causing the problems, return to normal, and all is well.
     
    In context with Poniverse, I do not use this analogy to call anyone out specifically, because I don't know the details well enough to make such an accusation. Perhaps there are more than one individual at fault for the issues we've seen. I do however feel that it would be worth the time to investigate where the roots of the problem are situated. If there is a member of staff who causes a toxic environment, this does not mean that person is a bad person.. This just means that they are not suited to be in a position of power, and because they have been given this position, they used it in a way that may have unintentionally caused a toxic situation.
     
    On terms with the general population of the forums, I must urge you all not to react with negativity towards anyone involved in the situations that concern the internal management. Though there may have been negativity spread by a few, regardless of how just their cause for frustration or their attitudes.. it is important that we, as the organism, work together to purge the poison of negativity out of our community. This does not mean we ignore the problems, this does however mean that we don't just abandon the forums, or make comments to people that would be considered rude or negative in some way, or that might re-ignite the fires of debate that have lead us to where we currently stand. As a community, we must embody the qualities we have all joined the forums for. It is important that we work together to work out our differences, but it is more important that we do so in a positive, and inclusive manor, without condescending attitudes or bias.
     
    Love. Empathy. Trust. Compassion. Open minds. These are things we all want to enjoy, just like our pastel pony friends have tried to teach us all. The only way we will achieve this is by being these things.. Embody them, and they will in turn come back to you. Even if they do not always, if you choose to stay by these qualities in the face of terrible odds, your show of strength becomes a monument to which all others can aspire to, and strive to achieve. No one is perfect, no one can always be strong.. but if we all work towards these as goals as a unified whole, then there should never be a time when one of us stumbles, that there is not a pillar of strength to help them back to their feet when they need it most. THAT is what true community means. And that is what we all must try to do if we wish to help our forums and our community mend the troubles we've seen unfold.
     
    In closing, I hope that all of you take something from this, take something from the values of that may sometimes be forgotten. The world outside can be very cold and harsh, but don't let that become you. To quote one of my favourite bands..
     
    "When you change yourself, you change the world." -Gojira
     
    Much love from Scribbler. <3
  5. Midnight Scribbler
    My world got a little less bright today. I found out this morning that two people I used to work with passed away in a car accident last night. One of whom was one of my best friends. Suffice to say I'm hurting pretty badly right now, and I'm not sure what to do aside from sit here and vent.. maybe drink. I dunno. I'm just not really sure what I can do aside from wait, which is the worst in light of such an event. Life can be cruel, but death is even more cruel to the living. I just hope he didn't suffer..
     
    I'm thinking of his brothers and sister today, and their dad, and the family of his friend who was driving at the time as well. He was also a good guy, though I didn't know him too closely, I always enjoyed working with him, and talking at parties when I did see him outside of work. I wish both their families the best.
  6. Midnight Scribbler
    I'm really getting fed up with seeing people complaining "mlp has gone downhill ever since s2" This attitude is ridiculous because the show has only improved in animation quality since then. The stories haven't changed in quality at all, but perhaps people's interest has, and instead of coming to terms with it, they blame the show. The show hasn't changed much, and I would know, having rewatched the seasons more than 2 times through now. It's really not different enough to notice, let alone say it's bad compared to the first seasons. All the arguments I've seen so far have been entirely groundless, or so trivial it makes the opinion kind of meaningless. Probably the only thing I can think of, is the change in writers, but even then, I haven't noticed much change in the show's style. But things like Twilicorn.. I still, to this day, after 3 straight years of being here, do not understand why people are so freaking butthurt about changes like this. Get over it, things change. The story goes on, and if you don't like it, complaining isn't going to stop it from happening. But it is going to drive fans like me up the wall. I literally joined the fandom during the gap between s3 and 4, but I started at the beginning of s1 when I started watching it. My only complaint about s3 was how short it was. That's it.
     
    That's my bit, and I'm stickin' to it. xD
    As long as they keep up with the show as it is, I have yet to lose interest in it. imo, they're doing fine, and I'm still loving the overall community. So I ain't goin nowhere anytime soon.
  7. Midnight Scribbler
    Dreams and nightmares are my connection to a realm beyond conscious knowledge. I feel as though I have a much more vivid connection than many I've spoken to. I feel a mixture of envy and pity for those who say they do not experience their dreams. I envy them because they never have to witness the horrors I have witnessed in my nightmares. I pity them, because they will never know the wonder of seeing the impossible happening before them.
     
    Though I don't want to sound like I think I'm better or worse in anyway, because truly I do not believe that, I do however feel that I have been gifted/cursed with some form of ability to draw information and send information without need for words or gesture. On countless occasions I've had my thoughts acted out by others without input from me in any way. I'll be thinking of a tune, and find someone along my travels singing the same tune. I'll have a dream conversation, and wake up to someone next to me speaking the words in their sleep. I'll dream of something, and have it come to pass in reality. I've lived whole lifetimes in a night of dreaming, no word of a lie. I realize some of you may be thinking "These seem easily confused with coincidence." And I was inclined to agree, but it just keeps happening, and it's becoming hard to ignore. I know for a fact there is still a lot about the human mind that we have yet to understand on any fundamental level. So these ideas, though some may choose to ignore and pass off as happenstance, I believe should be taken into consideration. Regardless of any factual evidence to lead anywhere, I can only go on what I have experienced, and what I have experienced is enough for me to believe that there is indeed more to it than mere coincidence.
     
    If this is some kind of strange gift, I cannot control it, and use it for my benefit usually. It happens just as heart rhythm. It is as much a part of me as breathing and sleeping. I cannot deny the things I have witnessed and experienced. They have affected my life in ways I can't just ignore.
     
    On the point of thinking I have a special gift, I do not believe I am the only one to have such experiences. I know, throughout history, countless people have claimed to have similar experiences. Some were proven to be false, while others remain mystery and have as much credit as my own accounts. Perhaps some of you have experienced things like this? I am interested to know.. Do you feel connected to the world around you like a radio transmitter?
  8. Midnight Scribbler
    Ok guys, so something happened to my friend and I back in March, and I thought I'd share it with you, just because it was so utterly bizarre, I'm not even sure what to make of it. It was around 1 AM one night, I was playing games with my headset on, and I started hearing something that wasn't in my game. I took my headset off, realizing then that the noise was coming from outside my apartment. I went out on the balcony, and heard the most creepy and unexplainable sounds I'd ever witnessed. They were loud enough to get my attention through sound proof glass, and over my headset. They also woke my friend up, who had his window open, and was listening from his room. The sounds soon died off, but we were both kind of spooked by it, because of how strange it was, so we stayed up watching TV for a while.
     
    Around 3AM, the sounds started up again. This time my friend had his phone ready to record it, and we captured a minute and twenty seconds of it from our balcony. Let me know what you think. There's a brief description on the soundcloud page.

  9. Midnight Scribbler
    Hey guys, just letting you know, I might not be able to get online for the next while. Things have gotten pretty messed up on my end. My landlord decided about 4 days ago to announce through my room mate that he was moving in, and wants the room I'm currently in. Needless to say, I'm pissed off and have chosen to move out.
     
    That said, I'm not going to have access to the internet until I get reconnected at my parent's place, so I might go silent for some time. I'm not sure how long, I'm practically pulling my hair out right now.
     
    Fret not though, I will not be gone forever, I'm definitely not leaving this site. I just have to get reestablished, and find my bearings once again. Forgive me for all this, I realize it's truly difficult for anyone following my RP. This whole pile of nonsense was not foreseen.
     
    I'll be gone starting tonight. Sorry for this guys.
  10. Midnight Scribbler
    -Disclaimer- This entry is nightmare fuel, nothing against site regulations though of course. This is a short story I did, essentially recalling a nightmare, but written in first person narrative. I just wanted to give you fair warning though, in case you're not a fan of horror stuff. For those of you who are, enjoy.
     
     
     
  11. Midnight Scribbler
    Alright everypony, so Scribbler has created himself a new blog for all of you amazing ponies to follow if you so choose. If you like my work, this is where you'll be able to follow my progress on things when I have time to post them. So without further blabbing, here's my first blog post!
    Below is a sneak peak of my upcoming fanfic! A story based on my OCs Clockwork Green, and Nova Strings. Some of you who have been following the RP thread "Beyond these walls" (Chapter 2) You'll be seeing Clockwork in action. For those of you who don't play, or haven't read that RP. Here's where you'll get to meet the insane pony known as Clockwork Green, and his loyal friend—and assistant—Nova Strings.
     
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    Clockwork removed the syringe from Nova's shoulder, and stood up, placing the spent needle into a safe bin, and then walked over to his instruments. Everything seemed in order. All his gauges read nominal, and he had all the information he had hoped to gain from this endeavour. His understanding of the nature of a unicorn's magic was beginning to piece together in his mind. He looked down to Nova, fondly. She was a good assistant, it was unfortunate she'd happened to turn on him the way she had. He sighed a breath of relief knowing this would not happen again, and was more than happy with his work. All his previous subjects hadn't survived this procedure, but Nova had. She was much more strong than he'd anticipated. Now she would be able to get back to normal. And the best part about it was, she remembered very little. Clockwork grinned, as he wandered out of the lab, shutting the door behind him. He began to chuckle to himself, revelling in his success, and as he thought more about it, his laughter grew until he was barely able to keep his composure. If Nova had been awake, he surely would have sounded mad.
    --------------------------------------------------------------------
     
    So, this story, I intend to expand upon the story from part one. I want to basically pick up where I left off and continue the plot along, but I also have plans to expand the characters more. I'll be adding in bits and pieces of the character's younger lives, and how they met. Also I will add more on how Clockwork became the power hungry, and self serving pony he is.
     
    I hope you guys like what you see! I'm working hard on this one. Based on some really positive feedback on my last work, I chose to do this next segment to the story. So this one's for you guys!
     
    Let me know what you guys think!
    Also if you're interested, and didn't get the chance to read part one, here's a link to that.
     
    Descent into the clockwork. (part 1)
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