First Analyses: Why Everybody Loves Luna

[Seafoam Green 11]

 

Hey everybody! Just finished editing my first video. I'm still learning but I'd appreciate it if you checked it out! And any feedback would be very appreciated!

Thank you ^.^

[Nuke87654 1,849]

You wish to hear a critique by me, Seafoam Green?

[Seafoam Green 11]

You wish to hear a critique by me, Seafoam Green?

Sure ^.^ I'm up for anything that can help me create better content!

[Nuke87654 1,849]

Alright, now:

 

I do like your voice as it's clear and can express words pretty well. It's definitely the kind of voice that an audience can enjoy listening to as you narrate your points. You can also articulate your points mostly well save for a couple of minor instances (I had a hard time trying to hear that word 'it' when you were trying to describe of how seeing fan portrayals of Luna is a reflection of that artist upon her) that can easily be ironed out by experience, which you're off to a good start in your articulation. 

 

While the vid was short, but it was informative and well informed and didn't dragged itself long enough as it was kept interesting by the many good points about Luna's popularity you were able to fill in in the 2 and half minute video. Again, more experience can easily build up more confidence to do longer reviews.

 

Now your biggest weakness in that vid would be referencing that Super Mario Bros. 2 as it seemed off point and added little other than be filler for those who may not know the reference. Now I'm not sure what that reference is but I'm sure it had some humor value. However again, this will probably take more work but keep at these videos is my best advice.

 

Overall I can see you be a good analysis with the points I've mentioned and whatever flaws you have can easily be remedied by practice and time. Keep at it Seafoam as I was impressed by your analysis for Luna.

 

 

To add about the animation, it held it's purpose for showing the images you wish to use for your review though nothing great about it. Your art of the OC is also pleasant to see as well.

Edited December 9, 2014 by Nuke87654

[Seafoam Green 11]

Thank you! That was very constructive and I really appreciate it, and I definitely see what you're saying. I know the first vocal take I took was very quite and I had to work up some confidence to be louder. I'm sure confidence will come in time as making these becomes more natural. Also, the reference was a bit off point, and in retrospect it probably wouldn't make any sense what-so-ever to anyone who's never beat the game. Again, adding in better references will probably come in time too when I get my commentary style down and I understand more about making the scripts and videos. I guess it's kinda like playing an instrument or drawing, the more you do it the more natural it becomes. And again, thanks for the feedback! Its really helpful : )

[HereComesTom 2,266]

If I may do some constructive criticism, too:

 

Your video was well-thought-out, and your points were good---I agree that being able to use our imaginations with Luna is part of the fun of the show.

 

Though at about 2:00 or so, it seemed like you were repeating yourself about how Luna's backstory was all we knew about her.  It wasn't a lot of repetition, but...I dunno, repetition in a short youtube video seems out-of-place.

 

Also, most other youtube commentators trim down the video's length by cutting out the pauses in their speech.  Not that you need to do that; I didn't always do that with my youtube videos, but it's something I noticed didn't happen in your video, so I figured I should bring it up.

[Seafoam Green 11]

Thanks Tom! 

 

I see what you're saying about the repetition. I'm working on writing longer scripts, or at least more drawn out notes. This first one was done mostly to see if I could do it at all, haha. But now that I have an idea and some good feed back I think I'll take a shot at making longer videos.