Bright Honor 2,654 August 21, 2012 Share August 21, 2012 Hello, everyone. I wrote a 10-line poem as a tribute to the one and only princess of the night, Luna. She is my choice for Best Pony and I felt like writing a nice poem for her. Here it goes: Princess of the Night: Luna is the princess of the night, Those who threaten her loyal subject shalled be filled with fright, Her mane is as starry as the night sky, And her beautiful eyes will make you feel quite shy, She gives us the night with such elegance and grace, And her subjects gratefully accept her ever-lasting embrace, Luna is beautiful, intelligent, strong-willed, and symbolizes leadership, One of Equestria's greatest gifts is her friendship, Thanks to Luna the great moon is always bright, For she is the great and beautiful princess of the night Well there it is! 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Count Paradox 3,548 August 21, 2012 Share August 21, 2012 Wow... that... that is just... so... so so so so awesome... I could never do something like that... I can't rhyme worth crap. 1 The Troubled Fighter: Paradox The Creative Romantic: Skyline The Blind Psychic: Psych Signature: CrystalRose & MatrixChicken Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bright Honor 2,654 August 21, 2012 Author Share August 21, 2012 Wow... that... that is just... so... so so so so awesome... I could never do something like that... I can't rhyme worth crap. Thank you very much. That really means alot to me. I don't do poetry very often, but I felt like writing a nice poem for my favorite princess. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheBronyHeart 2,641 August 21, 2012 Share August 21, 2012 I mean no offense to you or your poem, but it does not feel poetic at all. It feels more like talking with ryhmes. In my opinion, Poetry needs slightly more symbolic and ominous words, and try to be more creative with the rhyme scheme, or you could try writing a deep un rhyming poem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Count Paradox 3,548 August 21, 2012 Share August 21, 2012 Thank you very much. That really means alot to me. I don't do poetry very often, but I felt like writing a nice poem for my favorite princess. well, you did a very fine job, sir, a very fine job indeed. Now if only i could get my fanfic done like you got your poem finished... 1 The Troubled Fighter: Paradox The Creative Romantic: Skyline The Blind Psychic: Psych Signature: CrystalRose & MatrixChicken Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bright Honor 2,654 August 21, 2012 Author Share August 21, 2012 I mean no offense to you or your poem, but it does not feel poetic at all. It feels more like talking with ryhmes. In my opinion, Poetry needs slightly more symbolic and ominous words, and try to be more creative with the rhyme scheme, or you could try writing a deep un rhyming poem. I understand. It has been a long time since I wrote one and I don't write poems very often, so I didn't expect it to be perfect. Thank you for your response. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radiance64 7,053 August 21, 2012 Share August 21, 2012 Not bad dude, I for one find the poem rather poetic, although I suppose it could be nicer if you trimmed some of the words out. Anyway, nice job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lunatic 1,186 August 21, 2012 Share August 21, 2012 1 Inspired by myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XUNUSEDXXX 3,459 August 22, 2012 Share August 22, 2012 Lol, I found it quite kiddy with the rhymes (in a good way), and I found it quite elegant with the word choices. Good job! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bright Honor 2,654 August 23, 2012 Author Share August 23, 2012 Lol, I found it quite kiddy with the rhymes (in a good way), and I found it quite elegant with the word choices. Good job! Thank you very kindly! As mentioned, Luna is my favorite pony. I adore her oh so much!! I am so happy I did this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lance Piper 5 September 22, 2012 Share September 22, 2012 Very nicely worded poem. It would take me a while to figure out something like that. :3 But... there is but one problem with it, though I can't put my finger on it...The rythym, maybe? :S Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bright Honor 2,654 September 22, 2012 Author Share September 22, 2012 Very nicely worded poem. It would take me a while to figure out something like that. :3 But... there is but one problem with it, though I can't put my finger on it...The rythym, maybe? :S Why thank you. I most certainly welcome constructive criticism on my work. I am currently contemplating doing a poem for the princess of the sun, Celestia . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lance Piper 5 September 22, 2012 Share September 22, 2012 Well, go for it! I'm sure you'll do great! :3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Temporal Twins 89 October 21, 2012 Share October 21, 2012 We love this poem Wow... that... that is just... so... so so so so awesome... I could never do something like that... I can't rhyme worth crap. Don't say that I used to think that my sister had the creative head on her shoulders and that I could never be an artist But then I started coming up with these great poems. You never know, Sometimes you just need the right kind of encouragement it may be a song, or a video, or a picture, but when you find that special key, it will unlock the depths of your imagination... ___________________________=/|\=___________________________ Some will wright and some will draw, some with hand or hoof or paw. To all their craft, a skill within, their hearts a home, their art therein. -Temporal Twins Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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