Can Anyone Please Rate My OC? :)

[Cassafrass 249]

I'm really sorry to make yet another one of these posts (as the forum is already cluttered with them...) but I would really love if someone took the time to help me with my OC Curly Swirl. I am open to any and all critique - good and bad. Here's the link: http://mlpforums.com/page/roleplay-characters/_/curly-swirl-r6430

 

Thank you SO much! I really appreciate it.

[SFyr 1,982]

Interesting enough premise for a character.

 

Some opinion-based pros:

+ I actually rather like her coloration; it's very centered around one primary hue, but the variation and general unity works a lot better than some of the more glaring designs of OC's out there that I judge somewhat by appearance before even reading about them (people use a good bit of black and red, don't they?).

+ I like that she's not overpowered, is not given major importance in life, and actually has some room for realistic characteristics and relatable issues.

+ She has something to strive for; something that makes sense, and you can admire them (her) for trying to grasp for themselves (herself)

 

Some opinion-based cons:

- She seems to border on being one of those ponies with a darker background/situation than may be common in Equestria; not nearly as bad as some OC's in that way of course, but friendless/bullied and without a cutie mark at a late age--I feel there needs to be a compelling reason why she failed where so many at least found a direction to go (pinkie pie found her talent on a rock farm of all places, I recall). Not a huge complaint/concern, but I still feel the fact that she is unusual needs to be addressed or thought about as something something ideally explained by situation/circumstance, rather than what may come across as a "I wanted this character to be disadvantaged" kind of thing.

- Very relatedly, she has potential of taking the opposite direction of the too-loved OC's out there; if I read her bio correctly, she's borderline friendless, is teased/bullied, depressed, anxious, socially awkward... While these can be relatable and realistic traits, I want to caution you about not overshooting this and making a woe-is-me character. I do see traces of balance though, in her being driven and determined to find her path (and occasionally optimistic?). Again, can be perfectly relatable/realistic, so long as you tread lightly with this. ...I will say I'm glad there's no dead parents/friends and such involved though; all kinds of red flags there.

Edited May 16, 2014 by SFyr

[Jump Cut 59]

I think having your OC so real and relatable makes the OC seem like it could exist in the MLP universe. I'm big on OC's being actually plausible. also listen to the person above me. i agree with what they say.   

[Cassafrass 249]

Thanks for the feedback you two! How does it look now? I updated it with some major changes. I am also trying to use my code to get into Pony Creator so I can give her some glasses, but for some reason it won't let me copy and paste. Should I leave off the glasses or keep trying to use them? I would probably make them the same purple as her mane btw. Thank you!