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About this blog

Where I talk about all the stupid stuff that annoys me.

Entries in this blog

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Episode 151 - Forced Upgrades/Planned Obsolescence

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Planned obsolescence and forced upgrades. My family's ISP recently informed us that after years of planning and development, they were finally rolling out their BIG NEW SYSTEM--bigger, better, faster!!  The wave of the future!!    As subscribers, we were entitled to a free upgrade to better equipment that would give us faster speeds.  Let me rephrase that--we were given an ultimatum that we were required to return our old modems and routers and get
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Episode 150 - Grapefruit

Wow.  150 episodes.  Seems like a milestone worthy of something special.  But nah.  If I make it to 200, then... Anyway, y'know what really grinds my gears?  Grapefruit.  Who the hell thought it was acceptable to just bail out of giving this fruit a name of its own??  Why didn't they give it a proper name?  What... did they run out?  They ran out of fruit names, is that it?  Were the people who name things just tired and didn't feel like doing one more?  Were the people who name things sitt
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Episode 149 - When Characters Can't Tell Their Parents Their "Secret"

This episode contains moderate spoilers for H2O: Just Add Water, and Littlest Pet Shop. Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When young TV characters have some kind of big "secret", but they can never tell their parents.  I'm talking about, like, kid superheroes and the like.  Y'know, secret identities 'n' sh*t.  So, like, take Miraculous Ladybug for instance,  Marinette can't tell her parents that she's the superhero Ladybug.  WHY THE F*CK NOT??!  You can't tell me it's for their pro
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Episode 148 - Getting Your Sleeve Wet

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Accidentally getting a little wet spot on your sleeve.  Y'know, like when you're washing your hands or something.  It's the f*cking worst.  No matter what you do, you can't get it dry.  You blow it with the hair dryer for an eternity, and it feels dry, so you move on go back to what you were doing, and what happens?  You feel the telltale damp spot on your wrist.  So you go back to the hair dryer again, and it feels dry, but you can't really tell becaus
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Episode 147 - Raise Your Right Hand & Repeat After Me

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Arbitrary and pointless traditions regarding what you do with your hands while swearing an oath. Now yer just like, , the f*ck?  What is wrong with you?  Yup, I'm weird.  Weird things annoy me.  I absolutely hate the tradition of raising the right hand for oaths, and also placing the right hand over the heart for various pledges.  Why?  Just why?  What does it do?  What does it accomplish?  Does it mean anything?  Seriously.  Anything?  Why t
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Episode 146 - Dust

How in the wide, wide world of Equestria did it take me this long to get to this one? Y'know what really grinds me gears?  Dust.  Why...the...f*ck is it...absolutely...EVERYWHERE???!!!    I hate when my house is dusty, and I f*cking hate dusting.  Why does it accumulate so Celestia damned fast, even in a room with no windows that you keep closed up tight at all times?!  Why is the entire world made of dust??!!  Why is the universe so stupid??!!  Why does everything suck sooo MUCH??!! 
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Episode 144 - Ordering Kiosks

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Self-ordering kiosks.  F*ck these things.  F*ck them to oblivion. Okay, what pisses me off isn't so much that ordering kiosks exist; it's when a restaurant forces you to use them and gives you no other option.  In other words, they have no human employees that will help you or take your order, and they literally refuse to give you face to face customer service.  Given my social anxiety and aversion to talking to people, you'd think I'd absolutely l
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Episode 143 - Frizz Dayz

Only long haired ponies will understand this one. Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Frizz days. Most of the time, my hair brushes out just fine.  I brush for a few minutes, and it's tangle free and the brush goes through smoothly with no resistance and no noise.  But then, occasionally, for reasons that are utterly mystifying and inscrutable. the hair just decides that it won't brush out, no matter f*cking what.  I never change my routine, I always condition, and all variables appea
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Episode 142 - Bad Dreams

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Bad dreams.  Well, er, um, it's not exactly any one specific experience of having a bad dream that annoys me.  Well... heh...  I might be kinda weird, but as an adult, I actually find the experience of an occasional nightmare to be kinda fun!    I mean, when it's something wacky and crazy like some sci-fi horror. Lemmie start again.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Always having dreams about bad stuff and never good stuff.  I only dream about
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Episode 141 - Chocolate Chip Cookies Today

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Chocolate chip cookies today.  I feel like it's so hard to find a really good one.  I swear, I haven't had a really good chocolate chip cookie in 30 years.  Mrs. Fields' semi-sweet used to be my favorite as a kid, but they started to slip around 2000 or so.  They suck today.  And it's not just me--they used to be mom's favorite when I was a kid, too, and now she doesn't like 'em, either.  They really went downhill. When my parents were young and da
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Episode 140 - Light Bulbs - The Legacy Sequel

Long time fans of my series... *snickers*... pffft, yeah, right.      A pony can dream, though, a pony can dream...   Anyway, readers may remember that I did an entry on newfangled light bulbs way back in episode 6.  It's time a legacy sequel! Y'know what really grinds my gears?  F*ckin' LED light bulbs.  They're so fickle and unreliable.  We have so many that flicker on and off or go dim and then bright again and weird sh*t like that.  And it's definitely the bulb, I guarantee you (not the
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Episode 139 - Digital Edition

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Inaccurate use of the word "digital". When a movie or game releases a "digital" version, what does that mean?  When a movie is advertised as being available on DVD, blu-ray, and digital, what does the digital mean?  When Microsoft and Sony advertise all digital Xboxes and Playstations, what does that mean?  I'll tell you what they think it means, and what most people assume it means--download or streaming only.  No physical media.  I.e. no optical
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Episode 138 - Gender Reveals

I'm probably gonna take some heat for this one, but I don't care. Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Gender reveals.  Especially the big, lavish parties.  The entire concept of elaborate gender reveals is one of the stupidest, most asinine things humanity has ever created, and is one of the things that has probably caused super advanced aliens to look at us from orbit and go, "nope", and continue on their merry way. Yeah, let's spend a bunch of money and resources and pollute the env
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Episode 137 - Terminal Commands

This one might be a little insider baseball. Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Terminal commands on  Linux.  Anyone who uses any Linux based OS knows that if you want to do anything more than just the basic layperson stuff that comes bundled with the OS (like word processing, web browsing, listening to music, etc), then at some point you're going to come face to face with the terminal (aka the console or command line) for some advanced operation.  I don't mind this, but what annoys the p
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Episode 136 - OS EOL

Hey.  Y'know what really, really REALLY grinds my gears?  Operating system end of life. I've already ranted about how much I hate change.  Twice!  But this demands its own entry.  I basically live on my computers, and I am so, so f*cking sick of having my life and my world uprooted and upended and thrown into chaos every few years when my operating systems reach their Celestia damned "end of life".  Why, why, WHY in the name of Celestia's sunny ass do they have to kill operating systems all
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Episode 135 - Bad Game Remakes

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Bad and/or unnecessary game remasters and/or remakes. Don't get me wrong--a lot of remasters and remakes are fine.  Many are warranted and a huge improvement.  But many of them are also totally unnecessary, and some of them actually wreck things, in my opinion.  Firstly, the game industry is absolutely obsessed with remastering games.  They release remasters so soon after the original that there's basically no point.  Why remaster a PS4 game for PS
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Episode 134 - Once and For All!

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  The phrase "once and for all".  It's so overused.  It's such a cliché in movies and TV, especially epic fantasies and the like.  It's like a requirement for any movie with a sword battle in it at any point.  It's like the Wilhelm scream.  It's just ubiquitous.  It's so contrived.  Lemmie tell ya, when a hero boldly proclaims "ONCE AND FOR ALL!", that's when I stop caring.  I'm out.  Too melodramatic.
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Episode 133 - Kraydoze

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When people mispronounce Kratos's name.  Y'know, from God of War.  They get lazy and slur it, turning the t into a soft d, and the s into a z.  "Kray-doze".  "Kraydoze".  Drives me friggin nuts.  You have to annunciate a hard t and distinct s.  "Kray-tose".  Say "kray", then pretend you're going to say the word "toast", but leave the last t off.  Kray-toas.  Not Kray-doze.  Not Crate-O's.  Kray-toas.  Toas.  Not Doze, not O's.  TOAS.  Kratos is the bade
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Episode 132 - Zero Punctuation

hey yknow what really grinds my gear when people dont use any punctuation marks whatsoever like wtf are you even kidding me like am i the only person on the face of the planet who has heard of punctuation marks you would not believe how many posts i see on the internet that have absolutely no punctuation marks and the entire paragraph will be one giant run on sentence it makes it so hard to read and figure out their intention its so ridiculous like i am the only person in the world who passed en
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Episode 131 - Do This Really Hard Thing in 5 MINUTES!!

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  Clickbaity youtube videos that always say, "How to do this really hard thing in X minutes!"  You know what I'm talking about--it'll be like, "How to build your own gaming PC in 30 mintues!"  "How to configure your own open-source wi-fi router in 15 minutes!"  "How to make this ultra-realistic 3D model in Blender in 25 minutes!"  Yeah, most of these sorts of videos that I see are tech related cuz that's what I do.  But it could also be, like, um... "How
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Episode 130 - Falling in Water

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  The ridiculousness of characters falling into water on tv and movies. Movie/TV laws of physics: Fall from literally any height and land in deep water, at any angle, and be perfectly fine.  Surface tension does not exist.  Take no damage.  Fall off a cliff, unconscious, plunge 2000 feet, land in water, wake up on the shore, happy as a clam. Actual laws of physics: Falling into water from higher than about 20 feet and landing wrong (i.
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Episode 129 - More Foreign Stuff on Netflix

Hey. This is a sequel to Episode 81.  Quick recap--I hate reading subtitles.  Nothing against foreign stuff, just a slow reader, can't do it.  It really GMG that Netflix doesn't make it more apparent when something is subtitled and not in your region's native language.  I want to be able to tell at a glance. But y'know what grinds my gears even more??!  When you actually take the time to scroll down, click on "audio", check to see if subtitles are on or off, and they're off, then you scroll
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Episode 128 - Nacho Cheese Sauce

Hey.  Y'know what really grinds my gears?  When restaurants list "cheese" on an item but it's actually nacho cheese sauce.  Look, I'm not necessarily averse to nacho cheese sauce.  I typically only like dipping chips in it without any other ingredients, but the point is that if it's sauce then it should say sauce.  If I order nachos that say "topped with ground beef, lettuce, beans, and cheese", then I expect CHEESE.  GRATED CHEESE.  Not f*ckin' sauce.  If it says cheese then it should be cheese
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127. The Number of This Episode.

My gears. Y'know what really grinds them? When characters separate out either the subject or object of a sentence and move it out in front as a lone fragment in an attempt to sound more dramatic.  This is one of those things where you probably have no idea what the f*ck I'm talking about until I give an example.  This is where, instead of asking, "Where did you hide the money?", the character will say, "The money.  Where did you hide it?"  Or instead of, "You must not trust Mr. Smith",
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