Coming to terms with being the irrelevant anomaly that I always was.
Had some time to have introspect about my life in the past several weeks. One thing people have always told me over and over again, is that I am too serious. They are actually right. I don't laugh in social circles, I laugh alone and it's usually things people don't find funny. I always walked through life isolated ans asked questions, questions and more questions. I am naturally a curious person and the way I talk to people is like I am studying them, if that makes any sense to you.
Here I am now, 23 and alone. I associate with people, I talk to people and I have shared moments with people. But people in due time, have left me. Usually them coming to the realization that I am odd and they don't like me at all. This isn't me beating myself up, this has happened my entire life.
You either hold these philosophies on the subject of change. You believe that people can change and that we can all coexists and potentially get along. Or you believe people don't change their nature and you are forced to deal with the hand Mother Nature dealt you. I am going with option two, the view that people find to be the negative view.
I am not going to accomplish anything major in life. I never wanted fame, I did however want to die knowing I have done one great thing in the world. Just one major accomplishment and I could pass in peace whenever my time comes. I can't say that will happen at all, but I can't count myself out yet. I can only conclude that I am fine with being single, women don't desire me. And I would be fine walking the dirt trail alone in the night without a flashlight. I used to be afraid of failure, now it seems I'm embracing failure and accepting life for what it is.
7 Comments
Recommended Comments
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Join the herd!Sign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now