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And then there was this one time, Simba shot lasers out of his paws

Mesme Rize


Before anybody ask, i will say it first. Yes, this is real and i have no idea why, because this is something that is just so out of this world that i am sure that the makers where on something, when they made this.

Simba the king lion was a 1995 animated tv show made by the infamous Mondo TV studio, made by most of the same guys, that are responsible for the infamous animated titanic movies. You remember them right?

Now, it's already bad enough that they already try to cash in on the lion king name, considering this came out when the lion king name was incredibly hot. But they also use other things from other disney movies, especially the Jungle Book. You see, this show dosen't play in the african savannah, it plays in the indian jungle and Simba is the one that gets raised by the wolfs. Confused? Thought so. I will go a bit more detail in this with some of the stuff that happens in the show.

Its plot concerns Simba, whose father “The Lion King” (not Mufasa for some reason) is shot dead by hunters within the first minute, making Simba an orphan who must grow up to seize the throne and such. See, kids, these guys axed off the father straight away. No need to ease you into it with all that pesky “character development” and “build-up” crap!

Now it gets interesting. The villain of the piece, who naturally longs to conquer the kingdom himself, is not Scar, not Zira, or any other Lion King antagonist. It’s Shere Khan, the tiger from The Jungle Book, who has been turned into one of the most tragically incompetent and non-menacing villains I ever did see and whose right-hand man is Tabaki the Hyena (eventhough he is a jackal in the actual book.)

Simba’s allies, meanwhile, include such inventive creations as Baloo the bear, Bagheera the leopard (you read it right) a wolf family that raises him Mowgli-style, Kaa the python (put in mesme rize, at this point it dosen't matter), a Bambi clone named Buckshot, a puppy dog with a ball, two comic-relief mice who dress like sailors a bespectacled owl who looks like a mix between Winnie the Pooh‘s Owl and the Tootsie mascot, a raven with a top hat, magical fireflies, a terrifying talking tree, a goddamn dinosaur, and eventually a love interest for Simba to gawk at while she smiles, giggles and looks unnervingly human (you’re welcome Zootopia fans). Did I mention that Simba and Buckshot eventually gain the power to shoot lethal beams of light and that the mice receive enchanted medallions? That happens.


Simba the King Lion is stiffly animated, the sound effects are minimal, some parts have been ignored completely during the English dubbing (several scenes will have the animals sing a “jungle anthem” but no words ever come out; it’s quite the fever dream), the editing can be loathsome, continuity is frequently disregarded, the drama is cheesy, the comedy irritating, and most of the characters are just there to be there, never changing or contributing much to the story. The ones that evolve the most are Simba and Buckshot, the former being too ruthless to be the likable noble hero he’s packaged as anyway. I’m pretty sure some of the others, like the puppy, don’t even age. Maybe there’s a magic explanation for that too in an episode I’ve yet to see?


The show also loves to drag things out, giving us multiple chapters in which everything between jack and shit happens, even after Shere Khan’s anti-climactic and frankly merciless defeat (Simba totally obliterates his enemy and looks like a blood-thirsty maniac while he does it). They were so desperate, in fact, to make this a long series that we got an episode where Shere Khan’s never previously mentioned cousin was the bad guy and several episodes in a row where the heroes had to say farewell to each other because they needed to return to their respective homes after the war. They cry, and like most characters on this show, they cry a damn lot.

I don't know what else to say. This show is a miracle. Not for how good it is, but for how out of this world it is.

All of the episodes are on youtube on Mondos official youtube channel and don't you dare stealing their clips, because they will shut down your channel.

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