By and far, as well as sell and close, there is a momentous moment of fortuitous foresight for sights unknowable... unshowable... UNGROWABLE... to the rest of the thrice-blessed mess, I confess.  And yes, my success in besting the chest and picking the noselock free of its booger of confinement is one to be trifled - I mean, it wasn't a very good one, was it?  Don't you remember?

Regardless of the vested interest, I still managed to find myself in the phone book - and let me tell you, it's a LOT harder to let your fingers do the walking than they ever warned me it would be!  Have you ever had to drag your entire body weight with only two fingers?  DOS DEIDOS, MI AMIGOS!  Aside from really, reeeeeeeeeeally getting some nasty paper cuts, I managed to survive long enough for the buff stuff in my duff to start playing it rough; Hell hath no fury like a sandpaper-blasted hobo with a nailgun and a flaming pickle in his beard.

He didn't even HAVE a beard - quite a feat, but he still pulled it off.

And it STUNG... SO... BAD to pull that beard off, especially whisker by whisker; Bucky Shoo told me it felt like a tiny little guy with a posthole-digger, walking across your face and stomping holes out of it.  If I could get him to pay attention to the blackheads, I'd settle for allowing it to continue... but the miniature man might make much more mystery moving mentally, so I taught him telepathy...

... well... I meant to teach him telepathy... but I taught him homeopathy instead, and now he insists that I need more mustard every day.  I told him to call the colonel and get a Clue, but he was far too busy Plumbing the professor with the lead rope in the observabrary to even pay attention.  Cheapskate - won't pay attention, homage OR it forward!  Can you believe such a persnickety person provides palatial port-a-potties?  No?  WELL GO SOAK YOUR FEET, THEY PROBABLY HURT!

Eventually though, all things must come to an end - good or otherwise - and when it reaches that point in the current crazed narrative that I am supposed to stop