This is likely something to be totally out of the left field for most of you so a little disclaimer is in order. I'm not here to tell you what to think and I'm not pointing any fingers. Or hooves, whichever makes it clearer, I suppose. Alright then...

Alright, so what does the title mean? By "the needy" I'm talking about those in need who you could say are pretty desperate for supportiveness that they haven't been getting in the real world for some reason or another. OK now about what I mean by "parenting". Before I typed that last sentence, the title was "fathering the needy" because I've been thinking inside the context of my own experience which is what this blog entry is backed up with, in fact... Moving on. So yeah, the idea is to be like a parent for those desperate for support. Just keep that in mind for a bit as I'm just about to elaborate on this.

So what is it about this approach that's noteworthy? For some background, I had been doing some research on addiction and the effects of stressed parenting on children. At one point I saw someone on a pony forums ranting about something immensely tragic--suicide of a loved one, in fact--and he was totally out of it. How on Earth was I to help someone cope? After facebook had made me cynical about motivational quotes, I clearly wasn't going to give him any of that cheesy ****. Then the idea struck me. BE the kind of parent that would put him in a much better direction. I'll try to summarize the logic behind this in a single sentence. Stressed, depressed or abusive parents adversely affect brain development and because brain development only stops when you die, I might be able to steer his brain development in a better direction if I were to be the kind of parent that would promote it. When I thought about doing this, I felt bold and scared at the same time thinking about what I was toying with here.

But I did go through with it and there was a different set of emotions by that time. Stoic was one of them. You see, I realize that this is going to be a commitment. I wasn't just going to write him a poem about life is beautiful and just move on; I was going to be at his side for the long term. Yeah, I was to be this non-stressed, non-depressed, consistently available, emotionally available and attuned parenting caregiver to him. It was going to be me. Heck, when I announced this move at the time they thought he was lucky to have me which only helped to prime me up for this even more. Another thing I'm aware of is that this is not something that can nor should be made into an act or be faked or any form of artificiality; it had to come from inside. Bolded for emphasis.

Well, how did that work out? Well, a whole lot had happened and I'm already at 2147 characters so I'll try and keep it short. It felt amazing for him and even myself. It's like our hearts melted together and it was like he was in this protective, nurturing womb of a cocoon and I was the cocoon. It made a world of difference to him. We're not in a relationship because of our orientations doesn't allow for it but if it did, I'm pretty sure that's what would've happened. How does the idea of having the option to expose yourself wholeheartedly to a person who only seems to provide you with more comfort in response to that? Even I wouldn't dare to speak for him as to what it must've felt like.

So... What I just did was present an alternative to helping a person out. It's a little different from what I tend to see. Though I have to admit, I've gone to the life advice section before and have gotten overwhelmed by some of the cases there X__X

Well, before trying this, I used to do my best to try and solve the other's problem by being technical. I'd try to dissect the problem, see what cues, signs and symptoms I could pick up and then give a set of instructions that the person could execute. I'm not so sure how it goes around here since I very rarely visit the Life Advice section of MLP Forums.