My First OC: Tortuga

[SawmillTurtle 56]

I've been developing an OC over the past few days, and I'm looking for feedback that will help me to improve him in any way. A couple of things I should point out: I realize that the design is a little bland. That's the cost of using the pony generator, but unfortunately I have the artistic skills of a blind man with no arms, so I didn't have much of a choice. He is green to match his turtle-like personality, much like Rainbow Dash has a multi-colored mane. If the colors are distracting or off-putting or something, I can modify them or tone them down. I will have an improved design when I can find a way to commission an artist. Secondly, although the character somewhat shares my forum moniker of "Turtle," he is in no way a Mary Sue. I hate Mary Sues with the burning passion of a thousand suns. I do, however, like turtles.

So without further ado, here he is:

Tortuga

Bio:

There is nothing unique about Tortuga. He is not a special snowflake with some unique gift. He does not know magic, cannot communicate with animals, has no wings to fly and has never saved Equestria from certain doom. He does not know Twilight Sparkle or any of her friends, has never met Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, Discord or any other canon character.

He is, in every sense of the word, ordinary. This was part of his problem growing up. Even as a foal, he dreamed of doing great things. He'd seen great ponies soaring through the sky at great speed and heard stories of amazing bravery and magic. He longed to do these things as well. He had daydreams of standing before Princess Celestia as she commended him and put a mighty medallion of courage around his neck while confetti fell from above and the crowds cheered.

Unfortunately, his parents had named him Tortuga for a reason. He was slow, he was awkward, sometimes he could be clumsy. He was never popular, fast, or strong. Most ponies barely even noticed he was there. He read countless books on heroic feats, both historical and fictional, and tried to emulate qualities they exhibited. In all of these things he failed. He became increasingly frustrated as he grew older, because despite his most valiant attempts, he remained nothing but ordinary. To add to his problems, he was maturing rapidly and still had not received his Cutie Mark.

On one particular summer day, he was in the country visiting his grandparents. He was sitting beneath an old apple tree with his head down, almost in tears because he did not want to see himself as ordinary. He so badly wanted to do things of renown and have his name go down in history! He did not want to die and be forgotten by the sands of time. His grandfather sat down next to him, not speaking for the longest time. They simply sat together, listening to the birds in the trees.

“I can tell you're mighty sad, Tortuga,” his grandfather said finally. “Them heroes in them books you read mean a lot to ya, don't they?”

“They mean everything to me, grandpa!” he replied. “Why do I have to be ordinary and slow? Why can't I be fast, or fly through the sky? I'm worthless.”

“Well now,” his grandfather said, “I wouldn't say that you're worthless. There ain't no shame in bein ordinary.”

“Yeah, right.”

His grandfather sighed and rose to his feet.

“Come with me,” he said. “Want to show you something.”

He led Tortuga to a small pond way at the edge of the property. The water was crystal clear and surrounded by all sorts of flowers. Inside he did not see some exotic fish as one would expect to find in such pristine conditions, but rather a small community of turtles.

“Consider these turtles,” his grandfather explained to him. “Like you, they're ordinary. There ain't nothin' special about em. They're slow, awkward and won't ever change the world. And you know what? They're fine with that. They're happy bein who they are. They ain't worried about bein remembered in the pages o' some history book or getting' some medal from a princess. Only thing that matters to them is the world they live in. Their neighbors, their kin, their little community. Might not seem like much compared to them fancy shmancy alicorns with their magic and their big ol' wings and whatnot, but they're happy with the cards they been dealt. They don't feel no shame in bein' ordinary everyday turtles. Do ya understand?”

As Tortuga watched these turtles swimming around, one of them came up out of the water. It crawled through the dirt, slow as could be. When it got to his hoof, it looked up at him. It didn't smile or wink or do anything miraculous, but as Tortuga looked down into the little creature's eyes, he felt at peace with himself for the first time. He found himself smiling. As the the Cutie Mark in the shape of a turtle appeared on his flank at last, he looked up at his grandfather.

“I do,” he said. “I do understand.”

Since coming of age, Tortuga has traveled the land of Equestria. He has not done anything memorable or unique, nor does he try. He simply moves from place to place at his slow and steady pace, sometimes stumbling (though he has managed to get that mostly under control), doing work or helping out in small communities when he is needed. Sometimes this is as simple as helping someone paint their fence or mend their roof; sometimes it is to help carry groceries; sometimes it is helping to erect a new building or demolish an old one. He has never been publicly commended for these things and as he has matured he has realized that recognition for a good deed is not necessary. It is better to help in silence than to do a good deed and have everyone throw a parade.

Because while heroes may have their place, the commonplace ponies have theirs too, and there is no shame in that.

-Turtle

[Everleaf 541]

Interesting oc actually!  when I'm back to work with requests I would gladly give him a draw if you feel up to it.

[ElectricBeat 39]

I can see that you like turtles... He looks like Franklin! It's so cute!

Edited November 6, 2014 by ElectricBeat

[SawmillTurtle 56]

Interesting oc actually!  when I'm back to work with requests I would gladly give him a draw if you feel up to it.

That would be awesome! Thanks!

[Everleaf 541]

No prob at all...I don't know when I will come to it but more possible than anything when I've got my hands on a art tablet.

[Wyzecat 351]

The pattern is rather distracting and doesn't really match the outline...

 

But other than that, It's pretty good.