Friendship lesson question (it ain't easy being breezies)

[arftbmrf 40]

Hello.

I've got a question I was struggling with for a while. I'm rather slow when it comes to understand something, so I need your help to explain, if you would.

Quote from MLP wiki:

"

The journal entry for this episode is written by Fluttershy.

My experiences with the Breezies have helped me to see that kindness can take many forms. And, sometimes, being too kind can actually keep a friend from doing what they need to do. Pushing them away may seem cruel, but it's sometimes the kindest thing you can do.

"

So, I have a question -- what's that supposed to mean? That pushing friends away is fine? As in, I have a friend who needs help, and when he asks me to help him I say:

"Sorry, but you should do it yourself. It's the kindest thing I can do for you. So go away."

Call me stupid, but it doesn't look too friendly for the show with "Friendship" in its' title.

Maybe I don't understand something. It wouldn't be surprising.

So, is pushing friends away a kind thing?

[BastementSparkle 20,334]

It's not worded too well in this case, that's for sure. Though that's not what it's supposed to mean. What Fluttershy learned in this episode was tough love. Sometimes trying to be gentle and caring with friends isn't the best way to help them. Sometimes they need a bit of a kick, a push in the right direction. Fluttershy was trying too hard to be caring to them, and her intentions were good, but that's not what the Breezies needed, they needed to get home.

 

 Sea Breeze sort of learned the opposite though. His constant insulting and berating of the other breezies wasn't helping anyone, just hurting them and making them feel bad. Fluttershy helped him learn that being gentle and caring can be a good thing, just like she learned it's not always a good thing.

 

 You shouldn't just push your friends away, not help them at all. But you can't just let them say...sit on your couch all day eating all your Doritos and watching Ponies. You probably don't want that, and it's most likely not healthy for them. That doesn't mean just abandon them out in the cold without any help, but being kind doesn't mean just letting people do whatever they want like that. Fluttershy helped the breezies go home after kicking them out, she did the right thing.

 

 The moral at the end just needed to be worded a bit better.

Edited September 25, 2015 by BasementDash

[arftbmrf 40]

What if somebody doesn't want to go? Breezies were in danger in Ponyville, but, say, somebody is more happy in one place, than in their home. And while home they, like you said, "sit on their couch, eating all day and watching ponies", in a new place they actually live. Would it be tough love to kick them back to the old place? Even if they don't want to and will be unhappy there?

[colt .45 259]

Wow I never considered just how bad the lesson from this horrible episode is. Is there no end to the levels of suck in this episode?

 

Among many other things that are wrong with this episode, is the way the lesson is presented. It actually does make sense. Let me see if I can use a real life situation that happened to me as a better example of what they were trying to convey in that episode.

 

I work in the entertainment industry as does my really good friend, infact I met her through work. While I find my line of work to be rewarding in ways beyond financial, she does not necessarily. She felt the need to help people, so she moved to Colorado, studied hard, passed her test, and obtained her license to Despenser medical marijuana. She often come back here to visit friends and family, and she usually times these visits when I can put her on as a crew member, not only because she is a friend, but because she is really good at what she does. This more than finances her trip and is well worth the time she takes off from her job in Colorado. Well a while ago on one of her visits she had just broken up with a guy she had been seeing in Colorado, and I had recently broken up with my gf at the time. Well, we ended up hooking up, and realized that our relationship was deeper than just being platonic friends. Well, when the work project we were working on was over, and as the day her return flight was scheduled for got closer ( she usually stays for a couple months at a time per visit) she started to entertain staying here and maintaining a long term relationship with me and not going back to Colorado. To say I would have enjoyed this is an understatement. She is super hot (and loves ponies!) And, I love her. I really didn't want her to go. We have known each other for quite some time, and enjoy being around each other, so there's no doubt that we would be happy as a couple. But ultimately, I had to convince her to go back to Colorado without her feeling like I was rejecting her love. It was one of the hardest things I had to do. She was sad for a while after, as was I. I wondered if I had made the right decision at the time. But now that time has passed we both know that it was the right thing, and that it only made our bond stronger. She knows that I put her long term happiness above what I wanted, which is for her to be happy. We talk on the phone for hours regularly, text daily, and enjoy spending time with each other when she comes to visit several times a year. We both know that our friendship is magic and that geographic proximity isn't going to change that.

 

P.S. making this post made me realize that even a bad episode isn't totally without merit.

[ConcorDisparate 385]

Even if they don't want to and will be unhappy there?

 

You're going to far with such ideas . The episode makes it clear breezies are supposed to return home because the world is too dangerous for them. Basically, it showed that Fluttershy had to deal with their laziness, so they could be truly happy, not just enjoying one little day in Ponyville only to regret it later. It just shows that, sometimes, if you want to be kind toward someone, you must also be harsh even if it is for their own good.

 

Of course, there is more to that. Of course, it doesn't work everytime. This "friendship lesson" is incomplete. They had 20 minutes. It's not enough to start philosophical debates and complex friendship examples.

These lessons are just ideas, they can't apply everytime. You probably won't be a better friend if you follow these rules for everything. But just understanding the general idea and being able to apply them at the right moment, will.

Edited September 25, 2015 by ConcorDisparate

[arftbmrf 40]

Wow I never considered just how bad the lesson from this horrible episode is. Is there no end to the levels of suck in this episode?

 

Among many other things that are wrong with this episode, is the way the lesson is presented. It actually does make sense. Let me see if I can use a real life situation that happened to me as a better example of what they were trying to convey in that episode.

 

I work in the entertainment industry as does my really good friend, infact I met her through work. While I find my line of work to be rewarding in ways beyond financial, she does not necessarily. She felt the need to help people, so she moved to Colorado, studied hard, passed her test, and obtained her license to Despenser medical marijuana. She often come back here to visit friends and family, and she usually times these visits when I can put her on as a crew member, not only because she is a friend, but because she is really good at what she does. This more than finances her trip and is well worth the time she takes off from her job in Colorado. Well a while ago on one of her visits she had just broken up with a guy she had been seeing in Colorado, and I had recently broken up with my gf at the time. Well, we ended up hooking up, and realized that our relationship was deeper than just being platonic friends. Well, when the work project we were working on was over, and as the day her return flight was scheduled for got closer ( she usually stays for a couple months at a time per visit) she started to entertain staying here and maintaining a long term relationship with me and not going back to Colorado. To say I would have enjoyed this is an understatement. She is super hot (and loves ponies!) And, I love her. I really didn't want her to go. We have known each other for quite some time, and enjoy being around each other, so there's no doubt that we would be happy as a couple. But ultimately, I had to convince her to go back to Colorado without her feeling like I was rejecting her love. It was one of the hardest things I had to do. She was sad for a while after, as was I. I wondered if I had made the right decision at the time. But now that time has passed we both know that it was the right thing, and that it only made our bond stronger. She knows that I put her long term happiness above what I wanted, which is for her to be happy. We talk on the phone for hours regularly, text daily, and enjoy spending time with each other when she comes to visit several times a year. We both know that our friendship is magic and that geographic proximity isn't going to change that.

 

P.S. making this post made me realize that even a bad episode isn't totally without merit.

Thanks for the story.

Though, I'm still concerned -- does this episode mean that it's okay to abandon your friends and ick them out, even if they will be happy where they are? Truly happy with no dangers.

 

You're going to far with such ideas . The episode makes it clear breezies are supposed to return home because the world is too dangerous for them. Basically, it showed that Fluttershy had to deal with their laziness, so they could be truly happy, not just enjoying one little day in Ponyville only to regret it later. It just shows that, sometimes, if you want to be kind toward someone, you must also be harsh even if it is for their own good.

 

Of course, there is more to that. Of course, it doesn't work everytime. This "friendship lesson" is incomplete. They had 20 minutes. It's not enough to start philosophical debates and complex friendship examples.

These lessons are just ideas, they can't apply everytime. You probably won't be a better friend if you follow these rules for everything. But just understanding the general idea and being able to apply them at the right moment, will.

The same question to you, if you don't mind -- does this episode mean that it's okay to abandon your friends and ick them out, even if they will be happy where they are? Truly happy with no dangers.

P.S. Sorry for being like this, but I tend to take lessons from MLP more serious than almost anything else in the life and I'm kinda slow to understand things.

Edited September 25, 2015 by arftbmrf

[ConcorDisparate 385]

The same question to you, if you don't mind -- does this episode mean that it's okay to abandon your friends and ick them out, even if they will be happy where they are? Truly happy with no dangers.

 

It means I won't childishly keep my friends around if that put them in ridiculous danger, when their family are waiting for them, and when they are not reasonable enough to consider the problem by themselves. Yes, if that's the words you really want to use, I would "kick" them, and "abandon" them.

What's the point in keep your friends around if you can't act like one ? If you truly are one, act like one.

And it's not because they would be happy where they are going, it's because they wouldn't where they currently are.

Edited September 25, 2015 by ConcorDisparate

[arftbmrf 40]

It means I won't childishly keep my friends around if that put them in ridiculous danger, when their family are waiting for them, and when they are not reasonable enough to consider the problem by themselves. Yes, if that's the words you really want to use, I would "kick" them, and "abandon" them.

What's the point in keep your friends around if you can't act like one ? If you truly are one, act like one.

And it's not because they would be happy where they are going, it's because they wouldn't where they currently are.

Well... if friendship means abandonment, and it also treated like the kindest thing you can do, then friendship isn't worthy to even consider to have. In other words, it sucks.

Um... no offence if I said something wrong.

[ConcorDisparate 385]

It can take time to understand some things .
You will probably understand my thoughts one day. I wish you to be happy until then and ever after.

[colt .45 259]

What part of the episode leads you to believe that the breezies would be truly happy and in no danger if they stayed with fluttershy? The episode makes it clear that if they stayed that they would not be able to return home for a long time. If they couldn't go home they would miss their families and their families would miss them and make them sad. Therefore, they would not be "truly happy". It also make it clear that they would not be safe if they stayed in Ponyville. fluttershy realized that they would not be "truly happy and with no danger" if they stayed, that's why she made them leave. Now if they would have been totally safe staying in Ponyville, and if they would have been truly happy to have never been with their families, and if their families would be truly happy for them to never come home, then, and only then, yes, it would have been totally fucked up for fluttershy to kick them out and abandon them.

By the way, fluttershy would be more likable of a character to me if she realized that the other mane five ponies are her actual friends, and put as much effort into helping them as she does into helping all the animals, who are not actually her friends, but who are intact, dependents. Most animals can find their own food and shelter, in the wild without any help, unless they are sick or injured. By coddling these feral creatures she has robbed them of their independence, and made them depend on her for their basic needs. The animals are more akin to being her pets or slaves than they are to being her friends. Her friends (the other ponies) don't hang out with her because they are dependent on her for food or shelter. They hang out with her because they enjoy her company, and like being around her (for whatever reason). That's the difference between your pets or kids, and your friends. Pets and children depend on you for food and shelter, so that's why they are nice to you and hang out with you. Friends hang out wit you because they want to, not because they need to. If fluttershy was half as enthusiastic about helping her friends as she was with helping animals, her character would seem more worthy of the generosity, loyalty, honesty, laughter, and magic that the other ponies offer her. Sorry for the rant. Just my two cents. The reason I brought it up is because you make the assumption that the breezies are her "friends", which they aren't (so kicking them out or abandoning them isn't as big of an issue as it would be if they were friends) nope, not her friends, just some random creatures that fluttershy showed kindness towards, as is her nature to do. She sent them home because she realized that it was more kind to send them home to their families than keeping them as her pets.

[arftbmrf 40]

What part of the episode leads you to believe that the breezies would be truly happy and in no danger if they stayed with fluttershy?

Not breezies. I'm talking in general. Breezies were in danger. I'm talking about those who aren't. Who made their mind.

[Abstract 832]

Not breezies. I'm talking in general. Breezies were in danger. I'm talking about those who aren't. Who made their mind.

People often think they're happy - or fool themselves into believing as such - in certain bad situations, and don't see how truly unhappy they were until they are forced to make a change, whether by their own desire or a push from someone that cares about them.

[GuyNamedEarl 1,332]

I never really got interested in the breezies. I think the point of the lesson was something about tough love or some shit. To be honest, I skipped that episode because I was so disinterested.

[arftbmrf 40]

People often think they're happy - or fool themselves into believing as such - in certain bad situations, and don't see how truly unhappy they were until they are forced to make a change, whether by their own desire or a push from someone that cares about them.

I see. I guess we're seeing it differently, or not related at all.