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What the fuck is Australia Day?
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No, seriously, when the fuck did we decide this was a thing?
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I need to Google this shit, hold on.
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Oh. It's an actual thing, and not something Tumblr declared was a holiday because feminism or some dumb fuck-around. Thank God. I'd wish you all a happy Australia Day, but that require me to be a decent hu
Hmph. Do I really remember that afternoon?
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Oh. That makes more sense.
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Well, I'm gonna go play Swordburst Online now.
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OH SHIT, WAIT, IT'S FRIDAY! I HAVE TO DO A REVIEW! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHello everyone. Today we're going to be reviewing the classic My Little Pony episode, "Stare Master."
Yes, it's true, "Stare Master" was the very first episode of this sho
It's MLK day, and you know what that means...
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..........Rainbooms????
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Nailed it.
I don't know about you whippersnappers, but I personally remember the day MLK was shot. It was a warm sunny day in 2001, and the birds were a-chripin'...it must have been September-ish. Then, all of a sudden, everyone in the nation heard a loud pop. There was live news coverage, 'cause there was smoke coming out of his first tower, but after a while they went and shot his second t
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Good afternoon, students.
Welcome to our afternoon Friday afternoon congregation this afternoon. Last Monday's assignment was to watch the My Little Pony episode "Feeling Pinkie Keen," which highlights everything wrong with satanic devil worshiper that is Pinkamina Diane Pie. I have done this myself, and I have written my sermon today around showing the flaws of her teachings and practices.
But first, let us open our ceremony in prayer to our heavenly mother
Aaaaaah.
Good morning, my faithful students.
Isn't it a bright and sunny day today? It's a bright and sunny day today. Let's all sit together and worship our lord in prayer.
*chants* Salom, mening go'zal ma'buda / Men besh qurush qarz mumkin / Men keyingi eshik qo'shni besh bo'ladi / Men u dunyodagi eng issiq ayol eshak bola sifatida nima qilayotganini bilmaydilar / Salom Aaaaaaaaaah / Salom Aaaaaaaaaaaah / Agar meni eshitishingiz mumkin Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
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Another Friday, another review, another beheading of one of my family members.
Now, let's see, "Fall Weather Friends"..... Hmmm, I don't completely remember what I thought about that episode. Let me consult that review graph that I made a couple years ago for the numeric rating...
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What the fuck?!??!!??!?!
5/10?!?!?!?! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!?!
I remember the goddamned episode, and I don't remember it being 5/10 bad! That's one point higher than fu
It's the holidays, and you know what that means!
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...oh, hold on, it's not the holidays anymore. It's 2012!
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!!!!
The Forums: "Son of a bitch, this horsefucker is back."
You bet your swamp-ass I am! And I am ready for a brand new year of seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, and months! And what better way to kick off a new year of that great stuff than to review another episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic! Let's
I was going to, do this entry in poem, but fuck that dumb shit.
/haiku
It's the holidays, and you know what that means!
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PRESE-wait, no...
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VIDEO GA-no, I did that...
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VACATIO-no, no, no...
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SWARMS O-whoops, that's irrelevant...
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It's...the holidays and...it's time to...time to WRAP IT UP....???????????
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..,
Well...you could wrap up...your presents....
Okay, so, like I said, this will be my
It's the holidays, and you know what that means!
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SWARMS OF INSECTS!
"Swarm of the Century," My Little Pony's tenth episode, is about a little bug that seems cute at first, but then turns to be one of the most evil creatures in existence by eating away at stuff, and then coming in swarms. This concept was apparently so good that Transformers: Prime had to rip it off a couple months later. Well, at least "Scrapheap" was more memorable. This is probably one of the co
:okiedokielokie:
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I don't like this episode either, you know. You don't have to all stand on my kitchen table. :okiedokielokie:
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That means get out of my house.
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*The Dark Quivit Army leaves my house and breaks my dining room*
For the love of... *sigh* Alright, where was I??
Oh, yes, of course.
It's the holidays, and you know what that means!
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VACATIONS!
Yes, yes, some of you who follo
It's the holidays! And you know what that means!
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VIDEO GAMES!
The Game
Look before you sleep!
The Objective
Escape the Hurricane and make friends with your friends before both kick you in the nuts.
Our Players TWILIGHT SPARKLE The ONLY purple pony in town! She is completely oblivious to friendship, sleeping, and racial discrimination. Motto: "How do I use this bed?"
RARITY She's the local slut. If there's something that sucks, blows, or
It's the holidays, and you know what that means!
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PRESENTS!
And what a better present is there than to live in the present, aside from living in the past or dying?
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Reviewing a Fluttershy episode!
Now, back in the day, this episode was the Black Friday episode of MLP. You didn't get any discounts, but you did get a pack of smokes. No, no, not those kind of smokes, these kind of smokes:
Oh, goodness! Talk about your Black Frid
*Peaks outside for Dark Qiviut Army*
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Oh, Jesus, they're gone. Alright, then, today, we're going to be reviewing Boast*turns around*BustAAAH!!
*Heart Attack*
Oh! You guys! I wasn't...I wasn't expecting you! Want some coffee? No? Okay, cool! Well, today...err...
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Can I review South Park instead? I'm gonna review South Park instead! Today, we're gonna talk about "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe." Now, this episode is...
*Army of Moderators outs
Previously on My Little Phony...
CUE THE TITLE SEQUENCE!
*La-La-La, My Little Phony, we're running out of ideas, My Little Pony, until you all share your money with me*
Spoilers ahead, this is your only warning.
Alright, guys, it's Monday! You know what that means! Yes, that's correct. When we last left our little ponies, they'd been transported to yet another dimension where things suck and villains win. Their lives were being threatened by Fluttershy, so they're totally
Alright, guys! Time to review another episode from season 1 of MLP, because I want to stab season five until it vomits blood. And what fantastic marvel of writing do I have the pleasure of reviewing next after "Griffon the Brush Off?"
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*Stares at army of Dark Qiviuts outside my door*
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"The Cutie Re-Mark" it is!
Alright, this is a spoilers review, and since it's a recent episode, if you
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
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Oh, crap, that was yesterday, wasn't it?
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Uh, happy...Black Friday?
It's Fluttershy so it's cute.
Alright, everyone, time to delve into the next episode of season one of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. This is a fan cited favorite...I think...of the first handful of episodes. It's called "Griffon the Jack Off." In it, there's a griffon named Gilda who's just a complete jack-off. Who'da thunk? She br
What'd'y'know? I followed through with the schedule.
But for how long, Chris? For how long?!
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I don't know who Chris is.
*Saves Draft*
Well, boy howdy! I've got my work cut out for me! That there episode is the biggest bumper crop o' writing I ever laid eyes on until Look Before You Sleep gets here. Big Mac says this episode is too big for me to handle on my own, but I told him to kill himself. I mean, if I trucked through "Simple Ways," I could chuck throu
Okay, so, I've learned two things.
1) Constantly save a draft of your review, because you can spend an hour typing up something and then accidentally hit backspace while not editing the text and the accident will lead to you having to retype your entire review. Seriously, this has happened to me three times on three separate reviews.
2) I've decided on a schedule for these reviews. Every Monday and/or Friday sound good? Too bad if you said 'no,' because I don't care.
*Saves Draft*
Previously on My Little Pony...
Two-Lot Sprackle: "We're on the "precibulaijrshueriso/threshodldsldd/brink/thatsomethingreallybadisabouttohappen of disaster"
Princess Cel-Shade: "F**k you, b***h, you need to make some mother******' friends you loser 'lil cu**-as* mofo! F*****' go to Ponyville god damn you!"
Idiot Reviewer: "Kinky Sigh freaks out upon seeing purple ponies. She doesn't like purple ponies."
Kinky Die: "AW HELL NO! THEY'RE POPULATING TO OUR TOWN! APEJACK, GET THE SH
Date: August 20-something, 2012 Time: Probably 3 PM-ish.
Scene: 13-year-old PrymeStriker is wasting time on YouTube watching "Epic Wub Time" or some shit.
"You know, those fan-made videos are pretty funny to a stupid child like me! And those couple of episodes I watched in between Transformers: Prime episodes weren't too bad either. Maybe I should check out this series. What's it called? My Little...er...pawny?
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Nailed it! Hey! How convenient! The whole series is on YouTube!
The following quote applies to this review in retrospect. Please read. (Added 11/30/2016)
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Alright, alright, this isn't a new episode, but I had to come back to this forum after a long hiatus from the community in general (no special reason, I've just been busy with other things) to talk about this episode, even if it's been a while since I've seen it. Normally, I'd say "thi
I sure do have a problem with jumping around seasons as far as reviews are concerned, but I had to get on this episode because this is a very special occasion. 100 episodes of the third one of the best TV series of all-time! It feels like just yesterday I was a 12-year-old asshead sitting on my bed flipping through channels just to happen to catch an episode of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic ("Stare Master"). Granted, I changed the channel when it was over and didn't become a fan of the sho
Previously on My Little Pony...
...bad stuff happened...
...cue the title sequence!
This is a spoilers review, so if you haven't seen the premiere, you better run for your life if you can, little girl.
So, on to part two of "Call of the Cutie Pox Markless Google Maps Chronicles." Where we left off (by the way, check out my review of part one by clicking here or some shit), Twilight and the Crickets got their cutie marks snagged by Sunlight Glimmsher and...actually, that's it.
*Posts one entry in 8 months*
Oh, hi, I'm back-ish.
So, why haven't I posted?
I dunno.
Why haven't I gone back and reviewed other episodes of the show?
Because.
Great, so the fifth season of MLP has finally aired. I'm ready for a seasons worth of disappointment, rehashed morals, and a 100th episode that will either win or fail. What better way to start of the season no one asked for with the episode that made everyone shrug? This...is...
CUTIE MARKLESS!
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The following quote applies to this review in retrospect. Please read. (Added 11/30/2016)
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Oh, would you look at that. A blog feature I've never noticed.
Alright, so I've finally decided to get off my ass and set up a blog. Here's where I'll write episode reviews. As the only time I've ever done this before was with the Show Discussion topics, I'll have more fun posting my thoughts here as I won't
