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S4E26: "Twilight's Kingdom (Part 2)"

Previously on Zorc and Pals... PrymeStriker: I've scheduled a meeting with a board of feminists and that conference room isn't going to bomb itself.    Discord: Okay, but only if you fondle my balls while you're down there.   Scorpan: yo, deez ponies ain't so bad, I'd smash 'em   Tirek: no, daz gey   PrymeStriker: It's like 9/11. A pleasant surprise.   Twilight Princess Sparkle: Yeah, Celestia, this is your dumbest idea yet. And this is comi

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E25: "Twilight's Kingdom (Part 1)"

Welcome back to the season four wrap-up of My Little Pony: Friendship is Why the Fuck Am I Still Watching This Fucking Show!     Here we are. The end of season four, the end of the "what did I think of this episode back when it aired" arc-thingy, and on our 99th review facing the second part of this finale as Review #100. There's a lot to wrap up around here and very little time to do it. I've scheduled a meeting with a board of feminists and that conference room isn't going

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E24: "Equestria Games"

Welcome back to the season four wrap-up of My Little Friendship: Pony is Magic/AIDS!     Today, we're taking a look at the penultimate episode before the two-part season finale, Equestria G-...........wait a minute....................okay, no, good, that says "Equestria Games", not "Equestria Girls". *shivers*........ Ooookay...so, this is the episode that finally finishes the Equestria Games arc that we've been building up since the twelfth episode of season three: "Games Po

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E23: "Inspiration Manifestation"

Y'know what I just realized?   It's time for the SEASON FOUR WRAP UP OF MY LITTLE PENIS: FUCKING IS MAGIC!     We're only four episodes to the conclusion of season four! Can you believe it? I can't believe it. Can you believe it? I can't believe it. Can you believe it? And with this comes a few announcements for the "schedule" of future reviews. I intend to wrap up season four by the end of this month on June 30th. Yes, that's two weeks away, which means today we re

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E22: "Trade Ya"

Wh   ...Really?   ...Hmm...I must've been smoking something (likely weed, given that quote is from 4/20), 'cause I always remembered this as a really bad episode. Eh, well, let's see which two evils I go with. This is "Trade Ya".   -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   So this episode opens up with some of the worst exposition I've ever heard. Pink

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E21: "Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3"

Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3  /  Somebody please decapitate me  /  I need some weed or a nose full of speed  /  I like big tits.............err...........greed.    There, I finally wrote out a poem that's not a haiku and it only took me 77 entries to do so. Now you can all shower me with money and hot naked women. What did I think of this episode when it first aired?        ................K. This is "Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3"   ---------------------------

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E20: "Leap of Faith"

Just before we begin, I'd like some props for this episode literally being 4x20 without me making any Applejack eats celery/smokes weed jokes.......................................   ...mostly because there were no opportunities to do so. Anyways, blazeit:    Really now? Well, if "For Whom the Sweetie Belle Toils" is any indication, then maybe this season can save itself after all.     ....wait a minute, I just remembered something. Josh Haber wrote this epis

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E19: "For Whom the Sweetie Belle Toils"

What did I episode of this think when aired it first?     Really now? Hmmmmmm.....those are some big shoes to fill. Well, let's see how time can fuck things up. This is "For Whom the Sweetie Belle Toils".   -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   This episode opens up with Sweetie Belle waiting on Rarity to overview the costumes she made for her school play. However, Rarity is f

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E18: "Maud Pie"

Praise the day chopped sperm tail medley was invented as a dish. Let's see what my opinions were on this episode when it first aired:     ........Well, I've not written such thrilling, well-thought out reviews with my classic stamp of comedy since "Simple Ways". Let's dive into "Maud Pie".   -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   So this episode begins with all the ponies

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E17: "Somepony to Watch Over Me"

Ah, right, so...why wasn't there a review last week.......hmmmmmmm.....   ...College applications? Yeah, that's a good excuse. I'll go with that. College applications.   Right, so, let's take a look at my opinions on this episode back when it first aired:   .........................   The fuck?   ...............I didn't post anything about "Somepony to Watch Over Me" when it aired?   ...................................................

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E16: "It Ain't Easy Being Breezies"

Just the title of this episode alone makes me want to go to my nearest orphanage and burn it down with a single Molotov cocktail, and then film it and use it as my Patreon trailer. Let's see if my sour-ass memories were shared when it first aired. .......................th....the fuck? I liked the Breezie episode? B....But I thought that I thought this episode was trash! Well, I also thought I could speak English and breathe, but time has a way of changing things. And how. Let's see if th

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E15: "Twilight Time"

So I put up a banner.... Okay, let's see. "Twilight Time".........................................................................................................................   FINALLY! A WHOLE EPISODE ABOUT TWILIGHT MASTURBATING! It's like the Pony Gods have answered my prayers. This'll be rrriiiiiiich. Alright, as per matter of course, it's time to take a trip down memory lane and see what I thought about this episode when it first aired.  Wow. That was the most

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E14: "Filli Vanilli"

So I trench through the bullshit fuckazoid of "Rainbow Falls" and the unusually crap Discord episode of "Three's A Crowd" to be rewarded with "Pinkie Pride" and the ability to skip "Simple Ways"................for this piece of shit.   Luckily, to my recollection, "Filli Vanilli" was the episode that marked a turnaround in season four. Whereas with the first half of the season, every other episode was a steaming pile of horseshit, the second half stayed pretty consistent in quality. Ex

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E12: "Pinkie Pride"

Once upon a time, there was this prick named PrymeStriker.     He hated an episode called "Rainbow Falls".     He's dead now.     The End. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------   Well, I see we've redecorated around here. I don't like it. It means I have to reformat my series accordingly. And when every space is a double

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E11: "Three's A Crowd"

I'm still kind of dead from "Rainbow Falls"...*vomit*   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   God I hope this is better than "Rainbow Falls". "Three's A Crowd" opens up with Spike receiving the mail. Twilight immediately murders Spike, however, so that she can catch hold of the mail and see if Princess Cadence said yes to coming over this weekend. Is this the Equestrian equivalent to going down in the DMs?

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E10: "Rainbow Falls"

On the down side, I couldn't get to the review on Friday due to reasons I've mentioned elsewhere.   On the up side, I have changed my avatar/morphed my form into something much more...aesthetically pleasing...than what I had before. Don't ask where this face comes from.   Anyways, on to bigger and better things. This, is "Rainbow Falls".   ...................                                       Wait, this is "Rainbow Falls"?   ......       AwwwwwwwwwwwwwwFFFFFFF

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E09: "Pinkie Apple Pie"

Upon realizing I had to sign up for the draft when I turned 18 yesterday, this song muddled my mind for hours on end:     You're welcome. This is "Pinkie Apple Pie".   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   This episode opens up with Twilight reading books (holy shit, how out-of-left-field, I did NOT expect that at all) on genealogy, when Pinkie Pie interrupts her because of the pinksplaining e

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E08: "Rarity Takes Manehattan"

As my childhood slowly comes to a close, I constantly wonder how the fuck I'm going to get myself out of this mess. Turning 18 has got to be one of my biggest challenges, behind fucking one of the Kardashians and watching Equestria Girls. And yet, the inevitable is being laid upon me within due time. I have a mere 6 days of irresponsibility left. I'm gonna have to see what kind of Hell I can put people through before the bills start flooding my bank account. 18 years of bullshit. In the meantime

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E07: "Bats!"

*shivering*   So...much...bullshit.   There was Equestria Girls, then there was "Daring Don't", and now "Power Ponies". I've only done seven reviews this year and half of them are me ranting off my dick about how stupid what I'm reviewing is. I can't keep channeling my inner Nostalgia Critic. That was what I did years ago. I need to keep up with more creative jokes like "maggot semen" and the epic arc conclusion that was "sodomizes battery compartment." That was me at my prime. Or should I s

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E06: "Power Ponies"

I'll go back and re-watch the series, I said.   It'll be fun, I said.   The show's not that bad, I said.   Why must everything come back to BITE ME IN THE ASS?!   "Power Ponies". I forgot all about "Power Ponies"! And I liked it that way! But of course it's the next thing I have to fucking review after I trench through three episodes in a row. OF COURSE.   Giddy up, we're in for the ride of a fucking millennia. This is "Power Ponies".   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -  

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E05: "Flight to the Finish"

Welcome to the thrilling conclusion of...   Three One. Reviews Day.   Where I attempt to catch up from my two weeks of absence. In the previous installment we vomited over "Daring Don't." This week, we pillage, burn, and raid "Flight to the Finish". Let's see if it is, indeed, a flight to the finish.   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   Alright, last one, then I'm all caught up. This episode op

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E04: "Daring Don't"

Welcome back to...   Three Reviews. One Day.   Where I attempt to catch up from my two weeks of absence. In the previous installment we covered "Castle Mane-ia." This week, we tackle, rape, and murder "Daring Don't". Voyage onward, trusty steed!   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   -   So this episode opens up with Rainbow Dash geeking out about Daring Do's new book coming out in four m

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E03: "Castle Mane-ia"

Oh, hello there.   *sips tea*       ..........                               Well, it's been a few weeks, hasn't it?       ...Yeah....well, I didn't exactly plan to miss the last two weeks, but shit happens. At least I'm back now, and I intend on getting out three reviews today so that I can be all caught up with myself. What great fun for everyone. And just in time too, I suppose, since we've barely made it into season four. Ah, great, I can now officially say I've "bi

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E02: "Princess Twilight Sparkle (Part 2)"

Previously on My Little America: Trump is Our Fucking President Now.   President Trump: "We need to build a walrus, and that's what's happening whether you like it or not!"   PrismStore: "My blood pressure's spiked and I think I'm growing a vagina on my neck."   Twilight Sparkle: "Sarah, this is an intervention. We're concerned about you."   Deathmare: "(Bell tolls once) Well now. I seen this one before to myself. Since I do know why Princess Luna wanted power so badly . Such a shame tho

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker

 

S4E01: "Princess Twilight Sparkle (Part 1)"

*shivers*   There's no place like home....there's no place like home.   Yes there is, it's called Canterlot High.   GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.     ...       *ahem*   Sorry, everyone. I'm a bit......on edge these days. Ever since treading the ground My Little Pony: Equestria Girls, I haven't been quite the same. My blood pressure's spiked and I think I'm growing a vagina on my neck. This would be the third time this has happened, as only two other incidents have caused such a reaction

PrymeStriker

PrymeStriker