Alright, I'll kick this off with one of my more... recent memoirs.

I think it was... last month? I'm not sure. Either way, I was at home, alone and screaming my lungs out and making spell-bindingly good progress in the newest update of My Little Karaoke. I remember this because later that night I was drafted into buying three more bottles of water at the nearest FamilyMart (Convenience store). Anyway, later into the night, around 1AM was when I discovered the magic of the "Online Leaderboard". Seeing how, at the time, I was obsessed with "being noticed" and "making my mark", I did everything I could to reach the top. Eventually I managed to pull a shabby 7,000 on "Join the Herd" with the hardest difficulty. It was good enough for me.

Anyway, as I was scrolling down, a little ad on the side caught my eye. It was an ad for BronyMate. Now, I had seen this ad, in particular, before; this was the ad littering my lusterously unrecognized FiMFiction account and I'd been meaning to check it out. Having been up for nearly the whole night, I decided that I'd check it out with all my late-night delirium included. As soon as I opened the page I began to see the problem.
"Hmm..." I'd say, scrolling around in the drop-down birthday selection, "It doesn't go anywhere near 1990."
Now with a title called, "BronyMate", anyone could get the idea that it was a dating-service and normally, I'd turn away. But after seeing the lower disclaimer/description, I figured,
"Oh! I can make friends here! Great! Friendship is magic, after all!"
Nope. Not gonna happen. It'd been years since I started lying about my age, but I figured,
"Nah, I'm older than that; I'm sick of lying."
I wasn't exactly angry about the whole situation, more of disappointed and, with a lick of delirium, I tweeted out to the BronyMate peeps on Twitter, who, had also been spamming my account with their ads. The tweet, in full, went a little something like this:
"Wanted to make friends, but the only friend I made was the welcome screen."
I then attached a picture of the disclaimer and went back to rubbing sandpaper on my larynx in MyLittleKaraoke.

The replied later saying that it was only 18+. Meh. I'm thinking about doing livestreaming in the future. If I do, I'll livestream myself making a BronyMate Account as appreciation for burning an hour of my life.

Yeah, I'll probably write better episodes in the future. I just figured I'd get this one off my chest.