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Haha... my parents wonder what friendship could be.
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I can relate. Most of the people on my mom's side of the family have one pleasure in life: watching other people suffer. They don't even care about getting ahead themselves; so long as somebody else ends up in the hospital with something debilitating or something equally tragic happens, they're happy. Of course, it's also everybody else's fault that nothing goes right for them. My parents were kind of lousy too, but have improved a lot over the past several years.