Loud Opinion

More edits have been made. I'll quote and mention all of them as I address you replies. I feel like this could wait until after the dislike feature starts working again (maybe we'll never cross that bridge). All I need to know is when the dislike feature is fixed so I can put my character back to their proper template. Changed as suggested. Let me know if it's a step in the wrong direction. "...It also represents her unawareness to her own destiny and her struggle to see beyond the present." Reworked the personality. "However, she never dips into fanaticism due to how easily her mind is changed; She never takes even a sensible amount of care into her beliefs as she is used to them being proven wrong just as quickly as they were formed." Old habits die hard, so let me know if it's too deprecating or if being more positive would make for a better description. Rewrote the entire last paragraph of her personality. Should be easyer to read and a better discriptor. Lastly, I rewrote some of the backstory to be less dependent on Sombra.- "...as the horns aren't OF Sombra himself; they simply receded as time passed..." -However, now that Sombra wasn't the cause of Limbo's horns, that is even more reason for them to stay. If they were directly because of Sombra, it would make sence for them to go away when he did, but that's not the case anymore. Limbo's horns are a huge part of her character that make her a lot more endeirning. Without them, leaving the dream world is no longer her choice. Wouldn't you rather want to know the story of a mare that leap'd into a world she isn't used to in order to persue the happyness of friendship than the story of a mare that was forced from her home through no fault of her own? Maybe that's a false dicotomy, but personaly, I have no intrest in playing the latter and every intrest playing the former. Besids, I've done this before with Blue Thorn's tail and I've seen no complants in how he preforms in RPs.

Hey @Randimaxis, Thanks for the extensive review of my OC. The fact that this much work has gone into helping me refine my content is very reassuring. With that being said, I can't help but notice the level of tact being put into this reply. You've proven that you mean well, so don't be afraid of being too blunt going forward, this is all in good fun. (As a side note, I was about to post this message, but just as I made a single word italicized, the entire thing was deleted up to this point and the undo function didn't seem to fix it. So many words and thoughts unrecoverable... ) This absolutely needed to be changed. When editing this with immensely helpful in making an OC that I can have a better time playing. This seems like it hinges on an assumption and a misconception. We seem to be operating under the assumption that Limbo's need for companionship would have to be learned rather than an inherent need. This seems a little far-fetched given that herbivores such as her self would operate under heard mentality, which is even more socially dependent than our tribe mentality. Even with this given, I would still have to posit that fact that Limbo has seen friendship. She has spent a large amount of time seeing how other dreamers act in their dreams so she would have some idea what friendship is even if she's never experienced it. This is something I've put more emphasis on in my revisions. No need to be sorry. Rules are rules for a reason. I misremembered it as having no direct relations with canon characters, meaning family or personal ties. Hopefully, I've fixed it now. I half expected this kind of response. The truth is that I don't really think that my character description would be a little jarring without the subcategories. Having the sun being a dislike on par with nightmares, I think, doesn't sound very believable. In fact, it sounds a lot like 'LOL SO RANDOM XD!' to me. Also, the dislike feature doesn't seem to work (The dislikes you see is one I put in manually in the other category), so I guess I'm killing two birds with one stone. This seems to stem from me overcorrecting for Marry Sue Syndrome. I think the problem here is, if I may defend the sad sacks among us, that to combat the problem of Marry Sueism, we have to add flaws or underdevelopment to our characters. Something to work on, if you will, but at the same time those flaws don't come out of the either. However, mistakes on the characters side make then seem 2 edgy 4 me as people around them suffer because of their mistakes (an action needs consequence and flaws don't last too long when those consequences are direct). So, in order to stay coherent, our characters need to go through things they aren't prepared for or some kind of tragedy to justify their shortcomings and why they have persisted for so long. Now that I've said that I have just openly challenged myself to give this character a well written, self-inflicted flaw. It's actually very interesting that you bring up villainous OC's. It makes me wonder how common it is for an OC to be written as a dedicated antagonist. I'd love to know how often you come across it or how much villainy this template allows for. Furthermore, I don't see what about my OC excludes my original draft from being a villain. With a little bitterness, she could easily grow to resent friendship as she has so cruelly been taunted with it and take revenge on the world, but I guess that's easy for the writer to say. Anyway, thanks again for the input and I look forward to any further input on Limbo.

Luna's eyes returned to their standard order and the room around the three took shape. Though, the shape it took was entirely foreign; as is expected of the dream realm. "Welcome to the dream realm Unaria. This sacred place where the average contact the cosmic. This dream, in particular, has a major roll in our waking world for the constellation ruling over it is connected to all other dreams. Usually, constellations such as these rarely ever need to connect with ponies as the other constellations can offer enough companionship for them, but this one has been rejected by the other constellations. I don't know why, or how a single constellation could fall out of favor so rapidly, but it is through these dream walks that we look to find that out." Luna explained as her horn flared again. This dream was being difficult with her; not too surprising given the constellation dictating it. She had cast a few spells to get it to reveal itself to her guests. As she continued, the indescribably malformed landscape gave way to a smooth and lifeless expanse of stone. Various Statues with properly placed fountains littered the landscape all in various states of disrepair. Half crumbled ones were stood right beside pristine ones with no clear order. This wasn't the most reassuring sight to Luna. It seemed more like a nightmare than a dream, but she has seen ponies in high spirits for worse places. Wanting to see her guests in higher spirits, Luna decided to give them a more active role. She knew first hand that passivity can harbor some dreadful feelings. "Today, we intend to see such a pony who has been chosen by this constellation. Normally a dream like this would be difficult for me to traverse quickly. How about you and Cadence explore ahead a little and see if you can find him before I can?"

Cadence had overheard the delivery pony's plight, but only in pieces of minimal context as she had to keep up with Luna's conversation. Maybe she could help the mare but without to proper context, it could very well end worse than how it started; besides, she had to direct her attention to her aunt Luna. There aren't many opportunities for ponies to insert themselves into Luna's life, so, given that she could very well find herself as immortal as her one day, it would not only be in her nature to take this opportunity, but it would also be quite practical. However, it seemed that Luna would take the incisive, and encrust this night as a proper night to spend with her. "Looks like someone is already making new friends. Well, as much as I'd love to invite more ponies on our expedition, I'm afraid the stars can only be so accommodating," Luna mentioned, "Don't worry though, I'm sure there will be plenty of time to talk after tomorrow's ceremony." Now that they were all close to the observatory, Luna took the led and began preparing the ritual anew. Her magic grazed across the sky once more, trailing on the border between each others realm until it found the same constellation as before. "Now Urania, my lessons thus far have taught you the tools of our work," Luna declared though bright white eyes, "Just as an old kingdom shepherd would rely on its hounds to protect the sheep, so too are we like Shepards. The only difference is that we protect Equestrian citizens and the stars act as our hounds. By now you have all the tools you need at your disposal, but now it is time for you to learn our trade so those tools can do more than collect dust. Tonight, Urania, we begin refining your raw scholarship into professional craftsmanship." And with that, the room started to wobble like the shifting sands of a windy desert, "Now Urania, step inside, and let us be off," Luna said as the glow of her eyes started subsiding, and she added in a flatter tone, "You can also come with us Cadence; if you wish."

This was all a little bit too much attention than Urania was expecting for the evening. Luna's very direct method of teaching didn't leave a lot of room for a social life outside of her studies, even without them though, ponies would usually rub her the wrong way with their focus on her size, making small talk difficult. Besides that, these lessons were supposed to be something special; between her and her mentor, but, frustratingly, nopony seems to see it that way. Urania was half certain that Twilight Sparkle never had to deal with this much intrusion in her studies, but then she remembered Luna's past. A solitary life fostered envy in the mare's heart. It eventually consumed her, possessing her so that she would to its fowl biding. With that memory came a realization: Perhaps Urania was being tested. Maybe this was Luna's way of vetting out ponies that would make the same mistake she made. That left Urania with a simple choice. On one hoof, what Luna had done worked out for her in the end even with a lot of heartake along the way, but on the other, Urania could circumnavigate that heartake altogether if she started reaching out to other ponies more. She had no time to think of what Luna wanted, the pause was already a little awkward, so she responded, "It's nothing Princess. The more the merrier right Luna?" Luna looked back and slightly nodded with a calm smile. At least her student had an easier time getting along with other ponies than she did, Luna thought as she tried to usher the two back to the observatory, "If that's all settled then we should get going. The night won't last forever after all."

If only things were so perfect. Derpy looked downward and did her best to swallow her sorrows. She only met this young mare moments ago. What would she think if she just fell apart on her? No, what are friends for if you can't open up to them? But what was she to say? Her beloved outlived the heavens above. What if he forgot that she was still alive? No pony would understand that fear. As derpy thought this, her eyes began to well up, and she embraced Urania tightly, desperate for any comfort she could get. "But what if he-" Derpy tried to sob out, "what if he forgot-" but she started to choke up and she had to extend the last word out, "about me." Again she continued, strained through tears and heartache, "He's been with so many mares... I- I-" That was all she could manage, not wanting to overdo it in front of her new friend.

Luna had to agree. It was Urania's lesson, so it should be she who decides who to bring along with her. "Of course. It's only right that Urania should have a say in it." Also, it will be interesting to see what she decides. On one hoof, if she agrees then it could mean that she's opening up socially allowing her focus to switch away from the direct instructor instructed dynamic they've established. On the other hoof, if she denies Cadence, it could mean many things. She could either be standing up to authority, meaning that Luna was too direct in stomping out her impostor syndrome and now seeks a state of hyper-independence, or she could be avoiding an outside perspective disrupting what she sees as a delicate facade. Perhaps Luna was being too invested in her student's life, but how invested was too much? The fate of the world could rest on her as it did on Twilight. It was times like these when Luna wished she had her sisters uncanny ability to accurately predict the future. It would make decisions like this so much less precarious. "Only time will tell," Luna said out loud, more to herself than anything.

"Hmmm," Luna sounded as she was struck with another spout of inspiration. That makes two in one day. Luna was beginning to wonder just how much benefit she could squeeze out of a single event as she continued with a smile, "Funny that you should mention your subjects lacking memory. I was actually about to traverse the dream world to investigate a very rare type of dreamer alongside my student. If you come along then you might just get an insight into your problem. While I'm sure that our guests would hold some invaluable information, given that their citizens still have all of their memories from that time, but this expedition of mine might hold an important piece of the puzzle." Meanwhile, in a coastal town, a young stallion with a mane that sown like a thin layer of fresh honey had just returned home opened his mailbox to find a parchment scroll of the highest quality, sealed with royal wax in the shape of the royal solar seal. The stallion would have been more excited if he hadn't assumed it was a prank at first. Raising his eyebrows in surprise, the stallion opened it up to see that it was indeed, from Princess Celestia herself. He hadn't gotten an invitation like this in years ever since he flew the coop to make it on his own. The gold family was very influential as gold was a major component of the royal aesthetic. Anywhere you could put trim or accents on a piece of royal property, you could find gold straight from the gold family inventory, and he, Gold Dust, was the star child of that family. Or, he would be if he didn't leave to find a more independent life for himself. Apparently, this was important enough to involve all blood relatives. Not just those that had the same influence in high society. Indeed it was, for this invitation was for the official introduction of a new nation to Equestria. Gold Dust made it appoint to take the first train to Canterlot tomorrow.

"I'm afraid that's partially my fault Mrs. Cadenza. You see, my teaching style is very direct, and the work I do, even though I work with foals, is very serious. You probably came on too strong for her," Luna reassured, "it also doesn't help that she idolizes royalty, but that's a given these days. The crown is a very imposing thing without some glory to your name, and in these times of peace, there isn't much glory to go around." As Luna spoke, she thought wistfully. Perhaps she had been too direct in her studies, perhaps she had taken too young of an apprentice, but the filly showed so much promise in her dream that she couldn't take any chances letting the opportunity pass by. Luna had done the best she could with her, but she couldn't shake the feeling that there was something missing in her lessons. She then remembered her student's impostor syndrome and smiled gently. Perhaps great minds thought alike. Meanwhile, a silver-maned, clearly aged pony was about to lie down for bed when he got a letter from his son. It read, "Dearest father, I, along with a great portion of the silver family, have been invited to see the official introduction of the new royals to Equestria. Even though you didn't get an official invitation, I am willing to overlook your fall from favor and bring you along as my plus one. A great majority of the gold family will also be attending, so you better be on your best behavior. I mean it when I say we are all sick of your shenanigans and precarious games. You're a grown man, father, and I shouldn't have to tell you that if you mess this up there will be Tartarus to pay! Your son, Silver Back." "My own son," The stallion said, disappointed, "even you lack the vision to see the forest instead of the trees."

Luna was swiftly interrupted from her ritual by none other than princes Cadence. Her concentration shattered and, as a result, her magic dissolved. The glow of the distant constellation faded, the passage was closed, and the stars that kept it open were back to their dominant behavior. A set back, but it wouldn't end the night. "Mrs. Cadenza," Luna said shocked, "what are you doing here?" Luna had assumed that Celestia had already given cadence an invitation for the ceremony. What was she doing here? Then Luna asked herself how she got here so fast, and it all became much more clear. Cadence must have heard news of the new kingdom before the invitation was sent and sought us out. She might have even heard about the new kingdom before Luna herself did for Cadence to have arrived so quickly. "I'm so sorry, Urania, but you must excuse us while I see what is troubling Princess Cadence here. We'll be back to our lesson soon," Luna said as she motioned for Cadence to follow her outside of the observatory.

"Now you have me curious," Luna said with a raised eyebrow, "if my sole student isn't regal enough for a ceremony, then I would have to ask who is, or do you see me as a commoner with a crown?" Luna wondered if what Urania was suffering from impostor syndrome. Celestia had told her to watch out for it when Luna asked her for advice on mentoring. Apparently, it was enough to drive away another of Celestia's prodigy's before Twilight, so Luna decided not to take it lightly. She wanted to be upfront about it, but that could force her student into a state of hyper self-consciousness, and she would constantly second-guess herself as nothing would feel secret to her. Celestia often worried if she caused that to happen in Twilight but she appears to mostly be passed that if she ever did suffer from it. Luna wasn't going to take that chance. She would approach the issue with tact. A question here and a gotcha there. Always leaveing an out for her student until Urania could see the issue for herself. Luna's horn lit up for a dream walking ritual as her magic reached for a constellation that lurked beyond the horizon, shining down on a vast ocean. The constellation glowed in a way it hadn't for thousands of years. The stars seemed to have a mind of their own and protested against the ritual, but Luna was strong. Even though she hadn't performed the ritual in years, she still won out, and the constellation was open for passage.

"On the contrary, they've come to see us," Luna said idly as she gathered a tome off of a skylit pedestal at the center of the room. Unlike the door, the curved walls and domed ceiling were made from a more common material, with a lighter shade of blue that was clearly picked for how it looks in the moonlights, which, sadly, wasn't out yet. That soon changed as Luna felt Celestia's magic reach the heavens to move the sun, and synchronized her own magic with that of her sister's and razed the moon. "They will be here for a ceremony tomorrow evening. We can extend an invitation if you're interested. It is sure to be a landmark in our history," Luna continued as she opened the book and arranged the wall mounted telescope to a pre-marked angle. "Today, we are going to learn about a very special constellation, and in turn, a very special dream."

Luna took note of her student's fatigue. She often found it amusing that mortals still thought they could hide these innocent little things from her. Oddly enough, Luna was so used to seeing through people's facades that if Urania made no attempt to hide her yawn then Luna might not have noticed. As it was, Luna slowed her pace for her student's benefit. The change was obvious, such things were difficult to be seamless in, though her sister still had a knack for it. "You seem a little spent today, Urania," Luna said with a faint smile, trying to make conversation to fill the time as they methodically made their way to her observatory, "Lucky for you that today's lesson won't be strenuous. Relaxing, even. But you'll see that soon enough. Tell me, have you heard of the new kingdom yet? I've been told that word travels fast nowadays, but I'd like to gage that for myself and make sure my student is in the loop for such eventful things," She asked as they both approached a heavy stone door tinted a subtle blue with large silver hinges, knockers, and knobs. After her return to Equestria, her sister insisted that she take part in a redecorating of the castle. Much of the design was marble and gold trim to complement the working ruler, so Luna didn't want to stray too far from that. So most of the things she had a hoof in were remade in lapis dyed granite, and silver trim. She opened the doors herself, no science in making her student exert herself today, and gestured for her to enter first.

Luna heard a familiar voice coming from behind her and froze. Of course, tonight was a study night. All the excitement of the other alicorn's return had wiped the memories clean from her mind. It was easy to over-invest in the moment when you know how easy it is for you to detach yourself once the moment passes. She was hoping to have some time to look into an anomaly she had noticed in the dream world, but her lessons would easily eat through that time. It was then that Luna was inspired. "Urania!" Luna greeted back as she turned to face her student, the emotions of her meeting melting away, and she was glad to move on to a situation she had more control over. She then took on a more serious tone when she noticed how tardy she was, "Hmm... you are late, but I too was caught up in other duties to set up for today's lesson, so there will be no consequences this time. Just don't make a habit out of it." "However, there are still things to be done, if you'll follow me," Luna said as she turned and extended a wing to gesture her to follow.

And just as soon as she had shown her maturity, Aretes unveiled the ugly truth of a young mind. Something Luna didn't like to dwell on, yet it made itself known to her all the same. One day or another, they impose their truth as the universal, making oddities seem threatening, no matter how benign they would otherwise seem. When one least expects it. They will lash out at said threats, and often with loved ones. Those they care the most about. Those they care enough to try fixing. At the start of Arete's outburst, Luna was tempted to laugh as it seemed like a playful jab that siblings often had for one another in their own charming way. The mood soured when Arete's shpeal got personal, and Luna thanked her lucky stars that she hadn't cracked. Luna wanted to scold the filly for not only for disrespecting her elders but also for imposing this foolish standard of self-reliance that often hurt more than it helped. However, Tartarus has no fury like a brothers scorn and it wasn't her place to lecture ponies on how to operate in their family, so she bit her tongue. Alas, her own fury was at a simmer, and she could not hide the fusion of indignation and disappointment on her face. Aretes might have a point, and maybe this is what Thanos needed to become a more reliable ruler, but they were the only family they had for one another. They couldn't look to their mother or father for emotional support anymore, and to betray someone's weakness in front of one of their idles. To announce someone else's insecurities so brazenly. Well, Luna would like to think in the countless years she was dealing with the practice, she would have a good idea where the line between tough love and cruelty was drawn, but the fact that she was getting so worked up over this was evident enough that we all had our breaking point, no matter the age, and no matter the environment. "I'll meet you both just before the ceremony," Luna said coldly as she left for her room. It was all she could manage in such a precarious situation, but hopefully, Thanos would take it well. Even that hope was difficult to hold.

Now Luna understood Thanos' request. Looking at his sisters face it became all too clear why Thanos would want to keep that skeleton inside its closet (No pun intended), but this was for the best. There was no way he could keep the details of his occupation under wraps for any meaningful amount of time. Better for her to know now then to be shattered years later. This made Luna even more grateful that Celestia allowed her to handle this. If it were her sister then who knows how this could have ended. Her sister was no pushover, but dealing with mortals for most of her rule gave her a bad habit of compromising when she shouldn't be. Even before the banishment, Luna could see Celestia getting complacent, letting things get out of hoof before swiftly resolving them. Luna was a little taken back by Thanos' resurgence of doubt, making it evident that this would be far more challenging than her own reacclimation from Nightmare Moon. Perhaps the variety of ponies he meets will overcome the complications. What surprised Luna was when Aretes actually apologized. The sincerity of the apology was the sure mark of maturity. This filly was going to make a fine ruler soon. "I can't judge your destiny, Thanos, even if I wanted to," Luna said more somberly, not entirely satisfied with her own response, "We can begin planning the tour after the ceremony, but I am afraid my words have met the extent of their utility. Rarely is wisdom ever achieved through a single source."

Luna raised a brow when Thanos mentioned that he would like to discuss things privately. She almost didn't catch the part about them bringing gifts in the light of Thanos' request. It was not in Luna's nature to keep things secret, rather she was diametrically opposed to such indirect methods. Many ponies got the wrong impression with her and her sister, so it was understandable for Thanos to assume Luna would take his request casually. Indeed, her dark aesthetic and actions as Nightmare Moon told a story of a mare drenched in obscurity and infamy, and her older sister was the spitting image of the honest noble. These ideas, however, were only surface level ones. Luna's entire destiny, the core of her being, was tied with the moon. The thing that shone light upon those that the sun couldn't reach. To unveil things that would otherwise remain a mystery. Even the assumptions about her sister weren't entirely true. Just as the sun itself can be deceptive, with a direct gaze being blinding, in turn making mirrors, a symbol of introspection, into a weapon, so to could she be mischievous. Thankfully, her sister is a benevolent mare, but even that doesn't stop her from playing the odd prank here and there. What made it worse was the return of Aretes. What was she to make of this request? Did Thanos simply mean to discuss it in a less public room? If that was the case, then where? The castle didn't have an office. We liked to work from our rooms and every room except for our bedrooms had guards stationed within them for security reasons. Our free time was mostly spent in the gardens, but that was hardly privet. Maybe there was a place that was secret and socially appropriate in the castle, but Luna thought about it so rarely that nothing came to mind. Then there was a more concerning possibility. Could he mean to keep this from his sister? Luna shook her head both at the thought and to Thanos' request, "I'm afraid this room is as privet as it gets around here Thanos," Luna said, trying to remember Celestia's advice to remain agreeable, "I can instruct the guard to not let anyone through, but seeing how many emergencies we get these days there's a good chance that order will get ignored." "Trust me when I say this Thanos, secrets are never worth the effort."

Luna let out a giggle of her own at the youthful display. It reminded her of why she liked working with foals. So full of energy and wonderment, they had a way of spreading that wonderment to her. "Go straight forward through those doors, and it should be the third door to the left, Ateres," Luna said, sensibly prioritizing restroom needs as the highest as she idly opened the scroll passed over to her. As Aretes left, Luna took a moment to skim through the scroll before turning back to Thanos, "Looks like the party will be tomorrow evening. That does raise the question of sleeping arrangements. If you have no place to stay for the night, we can offer the guest bedroom we offer cadence when she visits and the spare one for you. Also, we are planning a tour for you after the reception if I forgot to mention it already. Would you like to plan for it today, tomorrow, or after the ceremony?" "Oh, and before I forget, Celestia sends her regards."

And there it was, the thing that kept Nightmare Moon at bay for so many years was shining forth through the two before her, the glimmer of hope. She let her smile broaden at that. She lived for moments like these, really. To see ponies being inspired like they could hold the world on their shoulders, made her believe she could too. "You remind me of myself when I was younger Thanos. If it's me you look up to, then I'm sure you won't have to look up for very long." However, there was the matter of actually setting up the ceremony. Luna nearly rolled her eyes at that, but thankfully was able to stop herself. Her sister was always the better pony person with mingling and hosting and all manner of social planning. "I'll let my sister handle that," Luna said as her horn flared to message Celestia on the ceremony, and an apology for the short notice, as she stepped down from her throne to be at eye level with her guests, "I still have to introduce you to the advisors that will be helping you back home, and go over some of the destinations for Thanos."

And just like that, the two unraveled before her. Luna noted that Aretes held fast even with a hint of falter, but Thanos' facade had fallen like a house of cards. This didn't surprise Luna. As the light that shines in the darkness, she had seen the same reaction time and time again. Maybe not as intense as Thanos' outburst; his cold magic and dark eye's reminded her of her cold and aloft jailer, the moon, while his wight bone markings reminded her of its underdeveloped surface; but some still were close Thanos' intensity as the dream realm can be a harrowing place to confront someone, even one as innocent as a foal. Luna briefly toyed with the idea of feigning surprise to help Thanos' self-esteem but dismissed it as decidedly counterproductive. This stallion needed guidance and a pony to put his faith in. Luna and her sister needed to be staunch in order to give that guidance. Thankfully, Thanos had sounded very similar to herself shortly after she was freed from her prison and remembered how she dealt with it. Perhaps a similar situation was what was needed, but that would have to wait, ponies need to know that the old kingdom of seasons is not only real, but that it had returned. "Aretes, Thanos, my sister and I hear your pleas, and luckily, we have a plan to get you both on the road to being the rulers you've always been meant to be, but you must steel yourselves, for the people need to be formally introduced. Your people are familiar with our rule because they were around to see it, but you are alien to our people. This needed to be remedied if we are to help you. We will hold a ceremony to formally introduce the both of you to our kingdom. Aretes, you are inexperienced, but this is a simple thing to fix. We haven't needed our advisors for some time, so we will send them to your kingdom to aid you personally until you know how you wish to lead and how to act on those wishes. Thanos though, your situation is bordering on precarious due to the nature of your destiny, so I would ask that you stay here in Equestria where we can be most effective in helping you." Luna watched their reactions as she finished, thankful that Celestia allowed her this time to shine while she worked in her own element.