Reverie

That's perfectly normal to feel that way if you are depressed and I understand not wanting people to know but letting it build up before getting treatment could make things impossible/unbearable for you in the future. I was so terrified and resistant to doctors and therapists and though my experience probably wasn't the best, in the end ignoring all the symptoms of depression is like ignoring a lump that could be cancer; you need to look for help and you don't have to tell everyone you know if you don't want to.

Chronic depression is Chronic depression is definitely a serious illness/mental disorder. Just as valid as any other form of depression like bipolar disorder. That really frustrates me too. For mental disorders like depression there is actually a chemical imbalance in the brain, there is something wrong with the wiring in your head that is making every moment painful. The mental pain felt by people who are depressed is actually received by the same receptors that receive physical pain. It is very much a real illness and one that is the most common cause of deaths for people under 30.

Insomnia is the worst. I'm still battling with that. I actually can physically not sleep without medication until it gets to the point where I haven't slept for about 3 days and my body just collapses but then I wake up from my sleep exhausted because I have terrifying lucid dreams where I still feel very much awake and often I struggle to break out of. It's like I get paralysed in my own head/sleep and it's exhausting getting myself to wake up but I'm terrified of falling back asleep again in case I get stuck for another 4 hours. I also get confused as to what was a dream and what was real life, I often dream calling/texting people asking for help or my mother coming in and arguing with her and then I check my phone and none of the messages were sent. Sometimes my limbs disappear... My brain just won't switch off I'm trying acupressure now. Which is a bit strange I must say but ANYTHING that will help me sleep would be a miracle. Anyone else struggle with insomnia and could give me some advice?

You should definitely see a psychiatrist. Manic episodes that characterise bipolar disorder are often misconceived as being happy one second, sad the next. This isn't what mania is however. It often occurs as frantic, uncontrollable, racing thoughts and the need to complete certain tasks or goals that may be insignificant. For many people it isn't euphoric at all but a need is felt to take part in activities that produce euphoria, like there is a pressure to be happy and poor and often dangerous decision making often results from it. So from what you described I'm not sure if you're bipolar but I'm not a professional. If you think something is wrong you should definitely seek help though and do not self diagnose. You may have some other kind of mood disorder. Hope this was helpful Edit: Also I completely empathise with people not thinking you have problems. People think that something awful has to happen to you for you to be depressed or mentally ill but you can be in an incredibly fortunate position and still be extremely unhappy. I'm still struggling to get people to understand this so I don't know how much advice I can give you there apart from being as coherent as you can in explaining what is wrong.

I am completely infatuated with Russia, it's history, particularly in the past 200 years or so and present day. There was a fantastic 4-part documentary on the BBC about Putin, Russia & The West that I'd highly recommend anyone interested on the topic to see if they can find it. I think it's incredibly interesting how the West deals with Russia as it is effectively a gangster state. I'd love to go there and really witness what's going on and write about it, politically it is an extremely exciting, though I realise to, dangerous place to be. State capitalism is going to have to be a big contender for the western world so it will be interesting to see what Putin will do now that he can more overtly exercise his control. Especially with elections coming up in France, America and the UK, it will be very interesting to see how possible new relations are formed. Obama deliberately never dealed with Putin and only Medvedev and though he was easier to deal with than Putin, given that undoubtedly Putin always had the power that will prove to be a mistake and there will be a lot of friction. Particularly on the subject of Iran - this loses business for Russia but also makes it a much more prevalent provider of oil. On the other hand the economy is already relying far to heavily on oil and without immediate change to infrastructure too much fluctuation could prove disastrous as it did in 2009.

Sing & play harp and just music making in general. My harp is my baby Though getting ready is also something I'm extremely partial too.

Are there any others here who have had experiences with mental disorders? I've just gone into remission after being diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder a couple years ago. I've spent some time in a psychiatric hospital but I really feel I'm on the right track now. I made this thread because I think hearing about other people's experiences can be really beneficial to recovery and in general it's reassuring to know you're not alone. Also I really hate the stigma there is against mental illness so I whatever little I can do to educate people here and there I will. So feel free to ask any questions about whatever too if you're just curious. I won't bite (most likely) Also I know it sounds a bit stupid, but the immense happiness of mlp has really improved my outlook. I also think it's quite impressive how there was basically an episode on tolerance and understanding of mental disorders when Twilight had her breakdown in 2.3. Made me have quite an unconditional love for the show.

yey another brit! I'm new too and I completely empathise with you on it feeling way too soon to be 18. I was so depressed on my 18th birthday, it's like a number that officially marks the end of your childhood

Haha that's awesome, I'm sure my friends will reach that stage too. Some of them are starting to cave though I can tell they don't really want to but they'll be proud of their brony status in time

I really like your trance piece, out of all your stuff I think the more experimental stuff is the best and most interesting. Love to hear more like it. Dropped you a comment on sound cloud, am a musician too

Hey all, when I started watching the show last week I said I wouldn't join one of these forums but after finishing all the released episodes in a matter of days I had a bit of a crazy weekend. Lucy was involved and I went on a crazy trip, the entire time I was playing with ponies and thought that I actually was one.. It was incredible. After that I realised that if the obsession/infatuation has reached a stage where it had embedded itself that deeply into my subconscious that I might as well join the online herd, especially as my friends are still at the 'My Little Pony? Seriously?!' stage (they'll be converted in time). My favourite character is Rarity, probably because she's a fashion designer. I used to work at Westwood and I can relate to many of her exasperations. Fluttershy would have to be up there as well but being here I think it is fairly evident I love them all. I no longer work in fashion as my love for music eventually persevered so I'll be studying harp at conservatoire come September. I also sing and play myriad of other instruments, am currently performing under the stage name 'Shadow She Cries'. I dabble in make up art and like to argue fervently about economics/politics too. I'm a Londoner and am so fortunate to be so. I bloody love living in the greatest city in the world. 'Reverie' means surrendering to imagination and is often used to described instrumental pieces suggesting a dreamy or musing state. Given what much harp music sounds like and my somewhat psychotic mind I figured it was quite fitting Sorry for this being so long, if you read it all thanks and I look forward to chatting to you all!