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Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  1. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Customer: Excuse me, do you need to use a stamp if you want a letter delivered?

    Me:

     

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    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Relax widders. They outlawed mailing humans in 1913ish. 

      Wait, you're dragon on a stick, right?

      (Jose jalapeno)

    3. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Hee, don’t think I can make a single reference back that won’t get me banned, can I?

    4. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Eh, maybe chewed out. I get chewed out a lot.

  3. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    I'm honestly surprised I didn't haul off and beat the shit out of someone today. I've been stewing in rage since I woke up and it hasn't tapered off or anything.

    1. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      I find chewing helps me. Teeth will wear down on ya & heads will get you arrested. 

       Stewing grumpiness is manageable.

  4. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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    1. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      "Single women don't care much either way, a new study finds."

       There, fixed.

       Then again, the terms "bachelor" & "healthy lifestyle" have never really correlated.

  5. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    You have a firm grasp on politics. We may not agree on much but I respect the hell out of you.

    1. honk friend

      honk friend

      this actually made me really happy and brightened my mood today, thank you ^_^

  6. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Happy birthday to you!

    1. Fluttershy Friend

      Fluttershy Friend

      Thank you! :fluttershy: Have a nice day!

      44.png.cc2105c580ca8952de8953f97b5c9a7b.png

  7. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Great news.i only got treated like shit a few times today.

    1. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Aye! Better'n one long, continuous stream, eh?

    2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      I saw a bumper sticker that read something like "Postal workers: led by the unknowing, doing the impossible, for the ungrateful." Couldn't be more true.

    3. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Well, I'm only ungrateful when all you give me is ads I gotta immediately recycle again while vividly picturing the wholesale mass tree slaughter involved in telling me about cars I can't afford.

       I ever get a handwritten letter, I'll pretty much kiss my letter carrier on the lips.

  8. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    I don't like the look of the two horses on the right of the banner. Are they going to try and sell me something?

    1. Show previous comments  4 more
    2. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Then what does it stand for? ... all of them? Thought it all being Ws would be catchier.

    3. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Also:

      https://goo.gl/images/4XFwLR

    4. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      WWWF Stood for World Wide Wrestling Federation. WWF was just World Wrestling Federation. Now it's World Wrestling Entertainment.

      i miss WWF though. Man I feel old.

      So Vince is the main antagonist of your show? Hah! Classic Vince. Destroying homes and shit.

  9. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    I'm just going to leave this here.

     

    1. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Been There.

    2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Destroyed that.

  10. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  11. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Why does pink eye have balloons on his ass? Or are those candies? Like what is the significance?

  12. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  13. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Can we all just agree that Stevie Ray Vaughan is freaking epic? Miss you brother 

     

  14. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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    1. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Don't get it. The kayak, right?

       ........

       Wait... is that a convertible Herse?

    2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Yes. Hence the confusion.

       I want to be carried out in a herse like that. I could be like willie the wimp. Except not rich.

  15. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  16. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    Happy birthday!

  17. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    I just noticed something:

    Why are you called the ever growing army if so many are concerned about the fandom dying out?

    1. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Everyone always says that. About every fandom. As much as this franchise pulls in, it ain't going anywhere!

       ...better not before I can manage to get into it...

  18. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    If you ever feel like a badass, just remember that when the Spartan Dienekes was informed that the Persians were so numerous their arrows would blot out the sun, he remarked, "So much the better, we shall fight in the shade."

    See? You're not badass at all!

  19. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  20. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    How  are you doing?

    1. Duality

      Duality

      Pretty well, thank you, Tuna. I've just returned from a several-day church camp and I'm starting my last semester next week, but other than that I've just been completing some holiday intern applications and suchlike. :fluttershy:

      Yourself?

    2. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Stone Cold Steve Jobs

      Nice, here's hoping you can get one of the internships going! I personally wonder what working in a church is like, but if I made an attempt I would probably burst into flames.

       I'm out of vodka, so that kind of sucks. 

  21. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  22. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  23. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    I got shot down again by the girl i was pursuing.

    But I have some whiskey and a large cookie, so i got that going for me, which is nice.

  24. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

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  25. Stone Cold Steve Jobs

    According to a claim made throughout history, Abraham De Moivre allegedly noted that, as he aged, he was sleeping an extra 15 minutes every night. He predicted that when the total extra sleep reached 24 hours, he would die. He was correct.

    What can be taken from this story? Math kills.

    1. Widdershins

      Widdershins

      Vigorous Nodding.

       Mhmm, Mhmm. Yes, yes, truly such mathmagical prowess must be sanctioned to only the worthy. Would spell disaster if these Weapons of Mass Deduction were to fall into the wrong, dripping hands!

       Surely an imbalance in the @Duality of power, is it not? Math must be eeeeeviiiil!!!

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