Stone Cold Steve Jobs

I love how cats think they’re perfectly hidden...even when they’re not. :3 

I love when they lay in the middle of the floor at 2 am and are surprised when you trip over them trying toget to the bathroom.

Exactly. My cats are WAY too trusting that I won’t stumble over them in the dark. 

Well, better than having your sweat glands fail too. ...don't live in Arizona.

 Gosh, I miss Fat Josh! Just can't take Fit Josh seriously when he looks like every other celebrity.

What?

Better too big than too small, eh? 

And it came in like three boxes. Not in pieces. Just one box inside another box inside another.  It was like those russian nesting dolls. Except there was a bag of screws and four wheels inside it.

I would love to be able to help you, but I just don't know enough about any of what you've described to give you any remotely reliable advice. 

Have you tried looking for an organisation or someone with experience in helping with problems like that?

They help somewhat, if only for a time, but this nonsense always comes back. Like cholera.

Ahah, nothing like child abuse to cheer me up! I ought to go see if I can't find the old AFV shows!

How about "You can choose who you are"?

That was number three.

The fourth biggest lie was "Sorry, this blockbuster does not have a copy of Super Smash Bros for you to rent."

It was a different time, you guys. And I know that was bullshit because they had a cartridge just sitting on the back counter that an employee apparently called dibs on.

People lie to me a lot.

Had numerous teachers call me a prick or that I didn't "have that flashing light that tells you not to say something." Course, not that they were wrong, but the latter was a rather sweaty gent of some five or so failed marriages ... that was running a "Communications class."

 Teachers are still mortal, after all. You lose trust in your students when they go about spitting in your coffee for a laugh. ...sigh, high school.....

What?

I need a drink.

*shove!*    Actually!

 It can be said, that any emotional result of excitement would result in such reactive parts of the body standing up; not unlike hair in fright or arms akimbo (means wide, flailing, lookitup!) when trying to right oneself after nearly tripping. Indeed! As initial impulse may vary, so too could the responsive part; all the more plausible for it's multitude of minutiae culminating into a more responsive, if even comical, result!

 I give you!

 THE TAILBONER!!!

*arms on hips, chest thrust & clearly proud of himself*

I was right.

He has a rare disease. Friedreich's Ataxia. Heart issues often accompany it. Currently he has random chest pains.

Sigh... well, health usually goes that way. One thing leads to another… least it's not all happening at nearly the same time like it did before

I remember when we were kids, you couldn't tell something was wrong. He fell a lot but what kid didn't, you know?

Friends are like snowflakes.

It's hard to drive when too many of them are piled up on the road.

Are they?

I never tried hitting friends with an axe.  

Friends are like horses 🐴  

They're hard to make go anywhere they didn't already want to go, they eat a lot of your food and, if you're really unlucky, they fall on you & crush your bones. 

Pfft, plenty rats leaving ship these days. I'm one if them; one way or another, Trump bodes ill.

Personally, I prefer a "village shaman" setup where nobody makes you do anything. Just on you if you don't listen.

How do i delete this from my notifications.

You can't. You pretty much just have to hope the conversation dies out and others let it drop.So, patience, pretty much.

 'Cause asking about it makes little annoying Dips like me want to prolong things just to antagonize. But surely, I have limits to my muzzy-head fuzzing!

 ... I know you're going through some stuff, @Libra. Do what makes you happy, eh? ...and if getting angry over politics does that for you, I wish you the bestest of luck there as well! 

Unless the mailman was being an @$$ first, my reaction to the harasser:

You need to be careful. Never know what the other person could really be like. There be monsters.

...where did you get that artist's conception of my normal family gatherings?

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but you are now my wife and you have no say in the matter.

So. Hey. Just released this mutant virus strain; an' yeah, I'm crazy. But here's the symptoms; call the CDC.

Greetings, we have only just met, and this may seem irrational, but here are the numericals by which to contact me, use them perchance?

In honor of the big guy, the most-massive Moonsaults of all time:

...like, counting weekends? ...or coming home at night to sleep? Get the feeling there's bosses out there that consider you sleeping as "time off."

Yes. I work sundays too. Yesterday was pretty light on work, so today is going to be insane.

Hey now! Been nipped at before! All that hopping around you & snarling is just a dominance show!

 ...Now when it's charging at you full tilt from a distance away with every growl it can muster... yes, warranted. And maybe match the "trigger" to the size of the dog, perhaps.

 I love dogs! I'd prefer to err on their side! Little Girls...Eh, we've got tons of those around.

If we get bit or otherwise injured, the supervisors will write us up or try to fire us. They've done it before.

 I used to like dogs. 

 Fighting off the urge to weep openly at the fact I never even was aware Pokemon Snap was a thing when I was a kid. Now Blockbuster! Boy howdy, that was like a Sock Hop in my day!!

 ...uh, I mean... Ice Cream Parlor! ...uh... Blast! Whattaya kids these days hang out at?

Kids these days spend their time primarily playing violent video games while talking about their many sexual escapades with other players mothers.