Where is Friendship?

[Strife 455]

(Just my random thoughts)

 

Friend.

 

A simple, single syllable, noun. Popularly defined as “one attached to another by affection or esteem”. Easily understood and straightforward, although rather bland. What is the real meaning of “Friend”? Does it differ to you from how a dictionary phrases it? Is a friend really that easy to identify?

 

Let’s switch gears for a second here and talk about Inflation. Simply put, a rapid increase in a currency’s availability decreases the value of that currency. That is inflation.

 

Back to friends. Overall, a friendship is generally valued and cherished in society. People are encouraged to make friends and forge long-lasting friendships. Well … where is Friendship now?

 

Years ago, people got to know one another and forged friendships so deep and long-lasting that they would do nearly anything for each other. Granted, we still see that today, but far less common. Why is that?

 

Recently, I’ve been very distressed and exceptionally depressed. I didn’t know what I wanted to do, other than knowing that I really need to talk to someone, so I decided to try and message someone. I opened up Skype, Xfire, Steam, MSN Messenger, Facebook, and a plethora of other programs and forums - then it hit me: I don’t have any friends. At all.

 

Quite a disturbing realization, really. I know that I seem like I’m asshole, but even assholes have friends Well, not me. That can’t be right. Where has Friendship gone? An interesting question indeed.

 

Due to the amazing feats of the Internet, people are able to link themselves up with so many social media outlets that it’s literally mind boggling when you sit down and actually contemplate it. Our society is now so worried about plugging themselves in with as many gadgets and “Likes” and “Thumbs Up” and “Friends List” that it all blurs together and consumes our time.

 

We’re so bombarded with people and “Friends” that we never have time to really socialize. Sure, we post a status update here and send a quick IM there, but do you really ever take the time to seriously get to know someone?

 

From the people you’ve socialized with on the Internet, how many of them do you know their real first name? Their last? Can you tell me their date of birth without a fancy electronic calendar? Their favorite movie, food, drink, color?

 

Now, how many people can you do this with? That information is really only the superficial small-talk chit-chat. How about the deeper, more personal stuff? What makes that person unique?

 

Most of you are probably struggling to come up with the basic stuff. No worries, it isn’t directly your fault. We’ve fallen prey to the internet craze our society has duped us into. Some of you can name a person or two, and that’s great - but think of the likely dozens upon dozens of people you call a friend, yet cannot even recall what they’re name is.

 

Back to that concept of Inflation. We’re so flooded with people and “Friend” status from a plethora of social media outlets. There are too many “friends” that try to be a number on a superficial list. Our value of Friendship has dropped down significantly.

 

Everyone’s definition of “Friend” differs, and that’s OK. To me, a friend is someone that I can count on. Someone I can trust. A person that is there when I need them and that I’m there when they need me. We share experiences with each other; to take the time to actually get to know them.

 

Do you have anyone like that? Do you have any real friends - or simply a group of acquaintances? A bunch of numbers of a list?

 

The Modern world is too fast - too fleeting. You can change that. Everyone can change that. Take the step. Ask a question. Slow down and take the time to really get to know someone.

 

After all, one day you might look around you and realize the same thing -- you don’t have any true Friendships. We "know" so many people that the value of true Friendship has dropped and we never invested in getting to know anyone.

Edited June 27, 2012 by Strife

[Gdrlowmgqwmhopqw 107]

Well, yeah. I have no friends. Never had.

[Finesthour 7,287]

Lol, you seriously cannot speak for everyone saying we all have no friends.

 

I have actually met many people online that I ended up meeting in real life, and we are the best of friends.

 

I am extremely close with MANY members, and know just about everything a friend should know.

 

Just because you don't take the time to get to know someone, doesn't mean we are all alone.

 

I'm even moving in with one of my friends when I turn 18.

 

You need to actually ATTEMPT to make a good friend to get one, not just sit back and pout because you don't have a friend.

 

It's an effort, and a blessing.

 

You need to work for it.

 

The new edit says this much clearer now, so I shall add my post from the bottom.

AH, this makes much more sense now.

 

We really are flooded by the mass of people that the standard of friendship is in fact dropping.

 

Edited June 27, 2012 by Crona

[Veiled Enigma 389]

I actually have four (I know it doesn't sound like much, but quality over quantity) very close friends from the internet that I've had over five years. I know many personal thing about them, as well as they now many, many personal things about me. We've helped each other through abuse, depression and suicidal thoughts.

 

I guess the thing is, the good people that you do meet in life you have to not let go. And even if you don't meet them in real life it doesn't mean you aren't real friends.

Edited June 27, 2012 by Veiled Enigma

[Finesthour 7,287]

We've helped each other through abuse, depression and suicidal thoughts.

And even if you don't meet them in real life it doesn't mean you aren't real friends.

 

The first part is what makes someone a true friend. It warms my heart to see others share the same joy.

 

And for the second part-

You gained my respect, as so many people believe the opposite.

This IS real life, as we are all people. We don't have to be physically there to share a bond.

[Strife 455]

-snip-

 

Sorry, but you missed the whole point of the post.

 

Never once did I state "everyone in the world". I said society as a whole.

 

If you do have long-lasting and significant relationships that will last for the next 30+ years, good for you.

 

You're the exception, not the rule.

 

I guess the thing is, the good people that you do meet in life you have to not let go. And even if you don't meet them in real life it doesn't mean you aren't real friends.

 

This is true, and I never once said otherwise.

[Finesthour 7,287]

Sorry, but you missed the whole point of the post.

 

Never once did I state "everyone in the world". I said society as a whole.

 

If you do have long-lasting and significant relationships that will last for the next 30+ years, good for you.

 

You're the exception, not the rule.

 

Ah, my mistake.

 

I interpreted this in the wrong fashion.

 

I thought you were meaning that the way the world acts socially today, that we are all truly alone.

 

Sorry for that.

[Veiled Enigma 389]

Sorry, but you missed the whole point of the post.

 

Never once did I state "everyone in the world". I said society as a whole.

 

If you do have long-lasting and significant relationships that will last for the next 30+ years, good for you.

 

You're the exception, not the rule.

 

You did ask this, I think me an Crona were just answering it, along with some after thoughts.

Do you have anyone like that? Do you have any real friends - or simply a group of acquaintances? A bunch of numbers of a list?

 

 

This is true, and I never once said otherwise.

 

And I never said you did. Edited June 27, 2012 by Veiled Enigma

[Pinkazoid 3,493]

I know more about my internet friends than my IRL friends >.>

[Strife 455]

Ah, my mistake.

 

I interpreted this in the wrong fashion.

 

I thought you were meaning that the way the world acts socially today, that we are all truly alone.

 

Sorry for that.

 

Certainly not my meaning. My post does need quite a bit of edits, for clarity and other things, but this was just a "hurry up and post it now or it'll never get done" kinda thing.

 

And no, we are not alone ... certainly never alone.

 

In fact, we are so flooded by people that rarely do we take the time to really get to know them. That is the point. We "know" so many people that the value of true Friendship has dropped.

[Finesthour 7,287]

In fact, we are so flooded by people that rarely do we take the time to really get to know them. That is the point. We "know" so many people that the value of true Friendship has dropped.

 

AH, this makes much more sense now.

 

We really are flooded by the mass of people that the standard of friendship is in fact dropping.

[Strife 455]

AH, this makes much more sense now.

 

We really are flooded by the mass of people that the standard of friendship is in fact dropping.

 

The last sentence in my OP was exceptionally misleading, I just realized ...

 

I edited it to make it a bit clearer as to what I was getting at.

[letterone 1,204]

IRL, I have quite a few friends. A lot of them I do trust dearly and know a lot about. Yeah... um... yup. Not much else to say.

Edited June 27, 2012 by letterZOID

[KakeiTheWolf 652]

No internet friends, no real life friends, no relationships outside of basicfamilial bonds. And I'm happy.

[StingeMuffin 244]

I only have one real friend who I met and know IRL. There are a few other people that I used to be "friends" with, but honestly, I don't stay in contact with them enough (or feel the need to) to consider them friends.

 

I think it's silly when someone will have 100+ "friends" on their face book account, yet they've only seen 90% of those people once or twice. To me, adding even one online person to my friends list is a big deal and something I become very shy about, because I don't really know that person besides some small chit-chat. If I find myself about to add them, I think "Am I really their friend?" and I convince myself that I shouldn't add them to my friends list. I guess not having any friends is my own fault.

[Whiteshade 1,426]

I have many associates and few friends.

 

^ What that fine sir said.

 

Definitely taking the pragmatic approach, I keep them close enough so I can get their services, but not close enough that they can potentially damage me. /mafioso

[NavelColt 22,881]

I'm an introvert who only requires a few close friends in person, and otherwise, I am quite content. As far as online goes, I honestly follow that same pattern. I have one, maybe two or three people that I consider to be legit friends, for as far as simply talking online goes. We've known each other for years and years, know eachother's names, talk about our days if we so choose, we can rant to each other if we're PO'ed and just need someone to talk to about it, etc. We've even mused what it might be like to meet up in person. So even though it hasn't actually happened, the internet friendship itself is solid.

 

Apart from that, I have many, many acquaintances. Friendly acquaintances, but really, I'm Cancer the Crab, I love my shell, and my few friends, and that's it

[I used to be a stranger 7,994]

This post has been redacted by the author.

Edited May 1, 2021 by Blue

[Starshine 16,334]

One does not need any friendship to survive

 

Over the internet we can easily be fooled by how many times those unseen strangers were very nice to us, and how much contacts we have, suppose that we need to vent our frustration. Behind the screen, all humans are free to be what they are not, including be very friendly and caring to others.

 

But do they really give a damn to your suffering?

 

This conversation, and every relationship around the net, are nothing but numbers and pictures.

 

Trying to find any true means of camaraderie here is nothing but foolish.

 

When this intimacy fails to remain platonic, it becomes Love.

 

or lust, unfortunately

[I used to be a stranger 7,994]

or lust, unfortunately

 

stop the planet, I want to get off

[Gigachip 148]

I have a good 8 friends from school

each one as has, when I needed help been there for me.

I have always been there for them when they need it too.

As far as knowing friends by name, I'd say a few online friends I have met are also good friends. I know their numbers, we text, play online games with each other, and I know their names

Are they the same as the ones from school nope, but they're still good people