writing The Dedication of the damned

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

Today, I seek refuge from the weary souls that surround me. I have long fought this war in life, and yet I have fought so little. Nothing seems to make sense while the eve of dawning night approaches so rapidly.

Yes, this is my story, neigh, my indication of a life of desertion. What else soothes the aches of tormented humanity? And so I find my tongue twisted and spewing lies forth to you and the rest of the masses. I find this in myself to be the damning factor, and seek retribution.

 

SO I walk without a shadow, from here to there. Never ending but all in the same of having already ended. This may just be my devil's curse, cast upon me like a simple inspiration. Yet this being, this entity, my missing shadow, OH how it burns me! I can feel it creeping forth, slowly stretching its ensemble dreadfully over me. I see now in the stained mirror, only the true face that covets me. This, oh this... the devil's curse upon me.

 

Arguments ensue as a discordant fellow I have become. Arguments with myself in my own maddening world. And so I find it easier to be alone as this damned shadow overtakes me. Seeking pity in places of grief that lead only to more strife. I seek the redemption that eludes me. I seek refuge from my accursed soul. I am among the damned and willing. God save my soul. Or is this only what i wish to say, what I no doubt only want to believe. Yes, this devil's curse, this shadow inside that escapes to overtake... I see it all. All but the inception of my own delirious mind unto yours.

 

 

Can you hear it? Oh, you cannot? A shame that is. Surely I now go mad; surely I die alone in this putrid shell of a being that is overrun with the facilities of devil's and shadow beings. I say again, I must surely be damned. Nothing will see through the abyss that is my illuminated anxiety. Oh no, and none too soon. I fear it will only be too late by the time you realize just what these words mean. Oh dear, for it seems that again I find myself unable to quite comprehend the sanctities that make my mind. Who does this make me? And just who does that make me in a world that cannot house me?

 

A world that is unable, and at it's very most not wanting to hold me. I find myself back to where I started in this mad and cruelly condescending landscape of barren fields and burning seas. Nothing seems left to meet my gaze as I scan the vast expanse to find only my lost interests. To this curse, a devil's tricks and melancholy catastrophe. I am lost in my own furrows and imaginative wasteland that is the fire I walk so boldly in. I walk in a circle of pointless apparitions that leave me deserving the most wanted sacraments of acceptance that often escape my own dwelling. I talk so lowly of my steps taken towards infinite despise. Perhaps I speak to myself, or my shadow of intent that will now, and always forever be about me. I hope, plead, for deterrence of the walls that constrict me in here. I must escape the shadow, and this dreaded devil's mission.

Oh to where I should go? For I have not the slightest of ideas in which I could muster any and all forms of delight to approach meager collateral and critique. I speak of random musings and squalor of better things. But can you not see that the reason for so is that I am doomed to repeat the mistake of writing for demon's sake over, and oh so much over again.

 

OH, my shadow, it eats.

Oh my soul is devoured, but not gone, only changed in its' form and seen so differently for what it now is. I seek now the most unfathomable of doctrines, why my own decree of freedom from tyranny. Tyranny ruled by the governs of my own torment, and so by these standards, I am bound to eternity by my own fortitude. I seek no more knowing such, and wish to end all things that are permanent.

 

Ah yes, to destroy anything premature and oh so permanent in the memory of existing thoughts. Redundant my mind is often declared because of its ill will of repeated mistakes. So I search deeper, farther down the line, past all which devil himself has ‘ought to have forgotten. Days of days well spent. Days of days now wasted. So our crimes which are apparent, now overcome by the damned spectra that is the creeping onslaught that the world designates my shadow. Search deep, find an answer, and kill the shadow.

 

This devil's curse I keep to saying, often wallowing in the self-loathing it brings. This devil's curse which forsook my past in the place I wish to see. But now, oh how now all I see is the barren fields. Anything and everything of value is gone to me. I am forsaken by my own shadow, and so I walk alone, yet still with the covering that disowned me so.

 

I found what I sought, but at the same, I have not.

For this is not describable, and I shall not attempt such.

Woe is me, for my weakness in words to tell you what I see. Though it breaks my heart in new ways, also unable to describe. You see, this shadow, an agent of the devil's curse, oh how it MOCKS ME! Standing where the light shows, always there for me in the worst of ways. THIS! THIS is the reason I am undesirable, unfit for living with the commons and instead forcing squander, meager helpings upon myself, for that is now all I know, all I will ever bear witness to as I march across a sea of shattered glass and salted fire. Let the trail of blood I leave serve as a reminder to those who lose themselves as I have. The blood will be all there is of me when I fully disappear in the shadow that is my innards and new way of thinking. Slowly, yet assuredly I will be devoured, and never sought again. So I walk in the circles I lay before me, obvious never to stray from my plans, lest I forget why I laid them. So on, and so forth, doomed to repeat, or failure to comprehend?

 

 

Unfair is this question that I bring myself to thinking. It only cuts deeper into the mind that I no longer wish to possess. Why would one such as me even need such a thing as a mind? For the shadow I have serves this function in its stead. And as I continue to walk in my circles, desperate to breathe in new breaths, I ask myself of why it ever happened. This is of an origin as to which I can no longer remember. Has it not been for all of existing eternity that I have been confined here in the prison of blood and hate? I sought this, yes, oh so long ago. Thoughts now dead that cannot be revived. And so, regardless of realizing hate in words, and pity in kindness, we seek on. We, I no longer fit. We, as one, A being and its shadow, now completely one. My new name, OUR new name, is a combination of nothing and digression. Leaving no room for unwanted desire of free will.

 

The shadow took over, I gave in, or so it seems, because here now, on the dawn of night I stand, coveted in every which way imaginable. I grieve. Why? To what end does my own pursuit follow? I found nothing? Nothing at all...

 

So it was my ignorance that sustained me, and kept me imprisoned. This to all ends must be what invoked my never ending insanity, this, is the devil's curse. So I realize, now, that I am trapped. By doing so, I figure by all means that insanity will next strike. The shadow, inching nearer to my throat. Proof of my damnation to the eternal flame of a kindled anger that will always thirst for the blood of oneself.

 

The devil's curse, one cannot overcome.

The shadow, one cannot defeat.

So what now of me? I left a trail of bloodied footprints meant to guide, but only led others to the damning vindication that I desperately still attempt to escape. Obvious and simple things do not exist. All things hold more true meanings in their sides that cannot be seen. Here and forever, I accepted my fate, amongst the playthings that the demons provoked. Nothing left for me. I encourage the shadow; let it take its awaited toll. My dedication, which by all means was meant to be an everlasting fight that would hold no victor, and go one past the eve that dawns on the morning.

 

I am a fool, and for this I covet even myself. I welcome an end to all things. Even that of my acclaimed dedication is nothing. Simply put, it is the dedication of the damned.

 

 

 

-David Favret

 

 

 

 

(Finally was able to access a decent computer and put it all into one post. Just disregard my other posts in this thread.)

Edited April 4, 2013 by Dr. BronyHeart

[LightRaider 148]

I was never one for that kind of writing, but that was very beautiful and sad. I'll definitally be thinking about this for a while. Thanks for that.

[Dimitri Hammer 3,645]

English is such a nice sounding language. It makes what you're saying come out at me. Translating it into Russian makes it sound just as beautifully sad. Yet again, I applaud you comrade. For this is another wonderful piece.

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

English is such a nice sounding language. It makes what you're saying come out at me. Translating it into Russian makes it sound just as beautifully sad. Yet again, I applaud you comrade. For this is another wonderful piece.

 

I... I cant explain it, but it feels like I have done something wrong. SOmething just isn't right... My work isnt done here... there is more to tell...

[LightRaider 148]

I... I cant explain it, but it feels like I have done something wrong. SOmething just isn't right... My work isnt done here... there is more to tell...

 

By all means, please do continue. I am anticipating the continuation of this story. Although its very reader ended, as you can interperet it however you want to.

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

A world that is unable, and at it's very most not wanting to hold me. I find myself back to where I started in this mad, and cruelly condescending landscape of barren fields and burning seas. Nothing seems left to meet my gaze as I scan the vast expanse to find only my lost interests. To this curse, a devil's tricks and melancholy catastrophe. I am lost in my own furrows and imaginitive wasteland that is the fire I walk so boldly in. I walk, in a circle of pointless aparitions that leave me deserving the most wanted sacrements of acceptance that often escape my own dwelling. I talk so lowly of my steps taken towards infinite despise. Perhaps I speak to myself, or my shadow of intent that will now, and always forever be about me. I hope, plead, for deterence of the walls that constrict me in here. I must escape the shadow, and this dreaded devil's mission.

Oh to where I should go? For I have not the slightest of ideas in which I could muster any and all forms of delight to approach meager collateral and critique. I speak of random musings and squalor of better things. But can you not see that the reason for so is that I am doomed to repeat the mistake of writing for demon's sake over , and oh so much over again.

 

OH, my shadow, it eats.

oh my soul is devoured, but not gone, only changed in its' form and seen so differently for what it now is. I seek now the most unfathomable of doctrines, why my own decree of freedom from tyranny. Tyranny ruled by the governs of my own torment, and so by these standards, I am bound to eternity by my own fortitude. I seek no more knowing such, and wish to end all things that are permenant.

 

 

 

-David Favret

[LightRaider 148]

Hell yes.

I love this so much, you may actually get me into poetry.

I commend you for this, and hope you continue writing in the days to come.

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

I am starting to ask myself why I am writing this... because it will literally torture me now. I have a need to complete things... but this describes the pattern of incompleteness in a sense of repeating everything over and over again and yet at the same time whilst being in this loop, you are experiencing new things at a constant rate and battling the subconsious mind. ...... This poem will haunt me, because it CANT be finished... oh sure, I can drag it out as long as possible, but I will never be able to do it the justice it so rightly deserves.

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

(First off, sorry for making several threads for this. I would have made it all into one post, but, my computer is incredibly crappy, and after about 1000 characters it becomes quite laggy, making it hard to type.)

 

Ah yes, to destroy anything premature and oh so permenent in the memory of existing thoughts. Redundent My mind is often declared because of it's ill will of repeated mistakes. So I seacrh deeper, farther down the line, past all which devil himself has ought forgotten. Days of days well spent. Days of days now wasted. So our crimes which are apparent, now overcome by the damned spectre that is the creeping onslaught that the world designates my shadow. Search deep, find an answer, kill the shadow.

 

This devil's curse I keep to saying, often wallowing in the self loathing it brings. This devil's curse which forsook my past in the place I wish to see. But now, oh how now all I see is the barren fields. Anything and everything of value is gone to me. I am forsaken by my own shadow, and so I walk alone, yet still with the covering that disowned me so.

 

I found what I sought, but at the same, I have not

For this is not describable, And I shall not attempt such.

Woe is me, for my weakness in words to tell you what I see. Though it breaks my heart in new ways, also unable to describe. You see, this shadow, an agent of the devil's curse, oh how it MOCKS ME! Standing where the light shows, always there for me in the worst of ways. THIS! THIS is the reason I am undesirable, unfit for living with the commons and instead forcing squander, meager helpings apon myself, for that is now all I know, all I will ever bear witness to as I march across a sea of shattered glass and salted fire. Let the trail of blood I leave serve as a reminder to those who lose themselves as I have. The blood will be all there is of me when I fully dissapear in the shadow that is my innards and new way of thinking. Slowly, yet assuradly I will be devoured, and never sought again. So I walk in the circles I lay before me, obvious never to stray from my plans, lest I forget why I laid them. So on, and so forth, doomed to repeat, or failure to comprehend?

 

 

-David Favret

Edited October 20, 2012 by TheBronyHeart

[LightRaider 148]

Holy crap a third one.

This one was much sadder than the rest...

And i loved it.

How many of these are you planning on doing?

And you might be able to request a mod to merge all of these threads into one, if you ask kindly.

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

Holy crap a third one.

This one was much sadder than the rest...

And i loved it.

How many of these are you planning on doing?

And you might be able to request a mod to merge all of these threads into one, if you ask kindly.

 

How many? well, I believe I may have SORT OF answered that question in part two, just go check the comments. As for merging, yes, I will have to see about that.

[LightRaider 148]

Dude, these are seriously awesome.

I would buy a printed copy.

I'll have to go back and check on the last page..

Can't wait for the next one if

there is one

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

Unfair is this question that I bring myself to thinking. It only cuts deeper into the mind that I no longer wish to possess. Why would one such as I even need such a thing as a mind? For the shadow I have serves this function in it's stead. And as I continue to walk in my circles, desperate to breathe in new breaths, I ask myself of why it ever happened. This is of an origin as to which I can no longer remember. Has it not been for all of existing eternity that I have been confined here in the prison of blood and hate? I sought this, yes, oh so long ago. Thoughts now dead, that cannot be revived. And so, regardless of realizing hate in words, and pity in kindness, we seek on. We, I no longer fit. We, as one, A being and it's shadow, now completely one. My new name, OUR new name, is a combination of nothing and digression. Leaving nbo room for unwanted desire of free will.

 

The sahdow took over, I gave in, or so it seems, because here now, on the dawn of night I stand, coveted in every which way imaginable. I grieve. Why? To what end does my own pursuit follow? I found nothing? Nothing at all...

 

So it was my ignorance that sustained me, and kept me imprisoned. This to all ends must be what invoked my never ending insanity, this, is the devil's curse. So I realize, now, that I am trapped. By doing so, I figure by all means that insanity will next strike. The shadow, inching nearer to my throat. Proof of my damnation to the eternal flame of a kindered anger that will always thirst for the blood of oneself.

 

The devil's curse, one cannot overcome.

The shadow, one cannot defeat.

So what now of me? I left a trail of bloodied footprints ment to guide, but only led others to the damning vindiction that I desperately still attempt to escape. Obvious and simple things do not exist. All things hold more true meanings in their sides that cannot be seen.Here and forever, I accepted my fate, amongst the playthings that the demons provoked. Nothing left for me. I encourage the shadow, let it take its awaited toll. My dedication, which by all means was meant to be an everlasting fight that would hold no victor, and go one past the eve that dawns on the morning.

 

I am a fool, and for this I covet even myself. I welcome an end to all things. Even that of my acclaimed dedication is nothing. Simply put, it is the dedication of the damned.

 

 

-David Favret

Edited October 20, 2012 by TheBronyHeart

[Pan the Fabulous Ferret 2,642]

I JUST popped the next one out... go get it if you want it.... I believe I ended it well enough to put a temporary stopper on it untill more ideas surge into my head.