Season five has its share of coming-of-age feels.

The Cutie Map marks a transition of the show. For characters like Twilight, rather than receiving lessons (of friendship), she's responsible for giving them. The map acts as a guide to spread the Magic of Friendship beyond merely Ponyville and the common lands of Equestria, landing a sense of adventure. What the audience got is easily the darkest, most mature episode of the show with several appropriately included allegories to real-life cults, communist societies/governments, and excellent characterization.

Castle Sweet Castle presents levels of mourning, but without acting so sappy. Twilight had very great reasons why she doesn't want to live there. Was the ReMane Five's approach daft? Definitely. But they also meant very well, and they realized their mistake. Despite some slow pacing, the tale was successful.

Bloom & Gloom is an episode I don't have a personal attachment to because the approach behaved a lot like a virtual checklist than a series of fears. But the fears are very real, and the approach to them is very real. The questions Apple Bloom asked — usually jokes in the fandom — was taken very seriously, and the nightmares played with her subconscious. Thank @@Wind Chaser's excellent analysis for swaying me into looking at this episode in a much more positive light.

Tanks for the Memories continues with the first Dash-centric episode of the season, this time focusing on her relationship with Tank the Tortoise. Both of them have a strong relationship with each other, evident by their Eskimo kisses during Just for Sidekicks. In what is Cindy Morrow's first episode back as writer for the show after taking last year off, it's easily my least favorite (and at the time of submission, second-worst) episode this season so far.

Ignorant of the situation.

What makes each of the Mane Six (including Spike) so likeable is how they're all very real. Even with their cartoon exaggerations occasionally, they're not without depth. They each have their strengths, quirks, and flaws. The flaws enhance the archetypical subversions, helping them become very relatable. Rainbow Dash ain't exempt; outside of Rarity, she's the most three-dimensional of the Mane Six.

But there come the times where Dash has behaved so insufferably. Alongside Rarity and Applejack, she initiated an unnecessary conflict with Trixie. In Fall Weather Friends, she and Applejack taunted Twilight and acted childishly, only to get her just desserts. The first half of season two made her a pain to watch thanks to her abusive behavior to the animals in May the Best Pet Win! and acting very egotistical in Mare Do Well (her friends not exempt from the poor behavior, either). After a great return to her true, maturer form in season three, her character regressed starting with acting like a rabid fan stereotype in Daring Don't, accentuating the conflict as a desperate idiot in Rainbow Falls, and completely disregarding her lifelong friendship with Fluttershy in order to trade for a one-of-a-kind book in Trade Ya!

Guess which Rainbow Dash fell to? The insufferable kind.

Rainbow Dash is VERY out of character! Part of it has to do with ignorant approach to the conflict from start to finish.

To begin with, when she was the weather team's captain during WWU, part of the goal was to cooperate with Applejack's and Amethyst's teams below. She must cooperate with both Applejack's in order to help grow the crops and Amethyst's in order to help wake up the animals from hibernation and melt the ice. Was she physically involved in waking up the animals? No. Due to her assignment, she doesn't need to be. But no captain would lack certain levels of logic over how important hibernation is to not only the circle of life for Ponyville's populous (and possibly any other village nearby), but the other animals, too. In other words, it makes absolutely zero sense for her to be so unaware of how hibernation works to reptiles and mammals.

Since she would've needed to be knowledgeable of animal life just to help lead the weather team, Dash didn't need to be reminded of how important hibernation is to the animals. But Tanks for the Memories treats her ignorance as if she never understood it. Take a gander at these two lines from very early in Act 1:

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Fluttershy: He's just going to hibernate.
Rainbow Dash: You do realize he's not a bear, right?

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Fluttershy: But don't worry. He'll reappear when the spring sun warms the ground back up.
Rainbow Dash: Come on! Tortoises don't hibernate! Somepony put that picture in there as a joke.
Fluttershy: It's not a joke.

The way Dash acted in this situation, she behaved as if reptiles don't hibernate at all. In Winter Wrap Up, Fluttershy made it clear that the animals had to wake up slowly. She wasn't merely talking about mammals. Reptiles, too.

But let's say she was ignorant of brumation — the reptilian term for hibernation with some differences — the whole time. That's no excuse whatsoever. The moment she completely disregarded Fluttershy's guidance, Dash's credibility flushed down the toilet like Twilight during Bridle Gossip. These two are very close friends, and it's obvious Dash trusts her; why wouldn't she go to her in the first place? 'Shy has a lot of knowledge of specific species. She woke up mammals before. She woke up reptiles before. Obviously, her encyclopædia about hibernation and brumation contains plenty of knowhow. Otherwise, why the heck would she be assertive when Dash ignored her and after the whole conflict in the first place?

Since she didn't believe her closest friend, why didn't Dash head over to Pinkie Pie after interrogating Spike? Alligators brumate, too. Whether Gummy's been around since before the pilot is unknown; the series doesn't imply the specific timing of the event. But Pinkie has been with Gummy since well before The Return of Harmony. So she should have some knowledge of reptilian brumation. According to the "Don't-say-that-word" gag, she's very familiar. If Pinkie told Dash that her alligator has to brumate, and Gummy comes out unscathed:

1. There's no need for Dash to come up with such an evil scheme.
2. Dash's song is completely pointless.
3. The death allegory becomes more jarring than it currently is.
4. Pinkie and Dash are close, and Dash trusts her. If Gummy survives brumation, so can Tank.
5. The allegory collapses on top of itself.

Imbecilic and evil.

Her actions in Tanks for the Memories are a complete contradiction to several key episodes about her.

Winter Wrap Up: To repeat what I wrote earlier, TftM violates Winter Wrap Up's continuity because she had prior understanding of the weather cycle's relationship with fauna. But there's one more egregious violation of WWU's canon, too.

Observe the most notorious block of lyrics from her song, which I'll get back to later:

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I know it's wrong, but what does it matter?
'Cause nothing's gonna stop me now
I'll change it all, it's only the weather
And nopony's gonna bring me down

Notice my emphasis. In song, she admitted that it's "only" the weather she'll change. Her philosophy is to not just have Tank hibernate — She'll change the weather and stop winter from coming, ala How the Grinch Stole Christmas.

The big problem is how dismissive she is of the weather. Since the pilot, she completely understands its impact along with the pegasi's importance of the weather. Instead, she treats the weather's impact like it's no big deal. That she can change it anytime and anywhere. Here, she's unaware of the impact weather has on society. For a character like her who comprehends the weather and operated as the weather team captain, this is completely out of character of her.

Think about it. The episode treats the conflict as an allegory of death. But the entire plot is about Tank needing to brumate to stay healthy. It's supposed to capture the sadness of death without actually being death. Given the need for him to brumate due to health and how it equates the two, it makes Dash look idiotic without even proper justification.

The Mysterious Mare Do Well: In an episode that contradicts canonical setting and characterization for the sake of horrid contrivances, Rainbow Dash said this (in maybe the episode's best scene):

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Rainbow Dash: All anypony talks about is Mare Do Well this and Mare Do Well that! What about me? How could everypony forget about me so easily? I mean... have I changed? Same sleek body. Same flowing mane. Same spectacular hooves. Nope, I'm still awesome. They're wrong. But... then... why am I all alone? I hate being all alone.

For good reason, too. Because everyone was glorifying the Mare Do Well and the ReMane Five were absolutely malicious, Dash is now seen as the villain, and she's now alone with no one there to like. She desperately attempted to regain some of that recognition only to make things worse.

One of the defenses for Dash's actions here is the fact that she doesn't like being alone. In response, it'd be in character of her to keep Tank awake. Just because he or she's in character in one scene doesn't make him or her in character the next. It depends on the circumstances. In Mare Do Well, Dash was acting stupid because her popularity crumbled, and she tried to do something for others to like her. It was torturous to watch her fall from grace because we were supposed to laugh at her misery, but her actions were believable.

Dash in Tanks calculated a plan to sabotage Cloudesdale's weather factory. That's not desperation. That's evil. Out of character.

Wonderbolts Academy: Initially, she was brash, very happy, proud, and cocky for good reasons. Then the Rule of Thirds builds up both the internal and external conflict presented by Dash to us. As Dust lets her ego get the best of her, Dash takes on the role of wingpony and becomes more reserved and concerned.

1. In Dust's first act of recklessness, she told her to slow down her dive because someone could get hurt. Dash sprained her wing during.
2. Next, Spitfire bluntly stated that the next event wasn't about racing. Dust defied that. Dash followed because she didn't want to let the Wonderbolts down.
3. But before the last straw, Dust wanted to really blow away the competition despite Dash stating they were winning by a mile. But the voices in Dash's head hit her, and she didn't want to look like she was disobeying authority. So she followed it up.

The point is that Dash is aware of the consequences of her actions. She may be brash, but today's Dash isn't the Dash of season one. She stands back, thinks things through, and is more humble now. The turning point came during Wonderbolts Academy, where she chose to give up her lifelong dream because she thought Spitfire (and by association, the Wonderbolts altogether) awarded ponies for their recklessness rather than being rewarded for doing the right thing.

This is where the first meter from Tanks comes into play.

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I know it's wrong, but what does it matter?
'Cause nothing's gonna stop me now
I'll change it all, it's only the weather
And nopony's gonna bring me down

In WA, she wants to do the right thing. Even though it was wrong for her to agree with the tornado, she agreed to do so reluctantly for the reasons already stated.

In a later episode — Testing Testing, 1, 2, 3 — Twilight called her out for nearly spitting in her eye and destroyed her straw. Dash hunkered in embarrassment, as she should. Dash wasn't focused on her test and instead played fun and games without thinking of the consequences. But Twilight kept her accountable.

In Tanks for the Memories, this situation shows how aware Dash is of everything. She's extremely aware that sabotaging the weather factory in Cloudesdale will have very dynamic consequences on Ponyville's environment. And by association, the towns nearby and Cloudesdale. Ponyville and the surrounding villages need winter to keep the cycle running, notably the hibernation of other animals, not just Tank. But Dash isn't caring about them. Instead, she focuses on keeping Tank up despite being told time and time again that she needs to hibernate in order to maintain her health.

Was what Dash did wrong? Definitely.

Did she know it's wrong? Absolutely.

But she was going to do it, anyway!

Unlike what happened in Wonderbolts Academy, she doesn't have a solid alibi. None of what she did here was remotely reasonable or understandable. Instead, she's being incredibly self-centered and disregards the lives of her friends and Tank himself. But the episode treats it as an understandable situation.

Most unfortunate is Dash gets away with everything she did wrong, all of it in cartoon fashion. But in an episode with as much emotional weight as this, the typical cartoon logic is completely inappropriate. Her actions such as clearing up the skies, melting the snow, and putting the leaves back on the trees are indiscreet; the idea that nopony has any idea she was the culprit makes no sense, especially since plenty happen in plain sight. Her most discreet decision was vandalizing the weather factory, but in a show about teaching kids morals, she should get some legal consequences for her actions like paying to fix the factory or doing most of the heavy cloud covering.

A high-stakes game of Connect Four.

If I want a really tense, exciting matchup, I would rather watch a game of Blackjack or Poker where millions of dollars are piled in the pot, not a casual game I would play with friends or kids.

@@Bhending the Rules on here and YouTube states this succinctly (and this segment of the analysis is credited to him): The stakes in Tanks aren't high enough.

Like what I wrote earlier, the entire episode is an allegory of death. You can tell through its explicit use of Kübler-Ross's "Five Stages of Grief" model:

1. Denial: Dash denies Tank needs to brumate even after Fluttershy tells her he must sleep.
2. Anger: Rainbow Dash inexplicably shouts at the Mane Six when they confront her about it.
3. Bargaining: In order to prevent Tank from brumating and keep her awake, Dash decides to sabotage winter.
4. Depression: When Fluttershy bluntly tells her the truth about her winter being petless, Dash loses complete control and starts to cry.
5. Acceptance: With support of her friends, she says goodbye, lets Tank brumate until spring arrives, and reads her a bedtime story.

But there's one big problem: the lack of an actual death. The Five Stages of Grief are utilized in an episode about a pet needing to sleep to rejuvenate for spring. Once Fluttershy explained to Dash about Tank needing months of sleep, the tension, sorrow, and grief feel fake. Everything the rainbow pony subsequently does to keep Tank awake lack emotional and storytelling weight because Tank's brumation is burned in the audience's mind. Rather than being believable, her logic is cringe-inducing.

Simply put, there's no reason for anyone to feel sorry for a character who, while supposed to feel sorry for, should feel some form of relief that Fluttershy gave an unfortunate villain some level of consequences. Unfortunately, the consequences feel hollow for the reasons I already stated.

If there were some actual stakes, then Dash's recklessness would've made some sense. What if during the first winter together (I'll get to this below), Tank wakes up not feeling well and needs some time to recover? Then once winter approaches, Dash would start to worry about Tank hibernating and not waking up, only to not work. You can play the Five Stages or have Dash try to slow down winter so Tank doesn't have to brumate as long, if not at all. But it doesn't work, and Tank has to brumate. Dash stays nervous, but has to. So with his and her friends' guidance, Tank goes to hibernate, and Dash goes by her everyday life, still feeling worried. But when spring comes around, Tank wakes up feeling nice and healthy. Dash won't have to worry about the hibernation stage so much now.

Little details go a long way.

But all that I stated earlier — the lack of proper stakes, Dash's horrendous characterization, the lack of appropriate consequences, contradiction of past episodes — aren't the big flaw. The biggest flaw comes from one line of dialogue in the very beginning of the episode:

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Rainbow Dash: How can you be tired when the most exciting time of the year is right around the corner? And don't forget the best part – our first winter together!

Why?

It's an explicit contradiction of continuity.

How?

Rainbow Dash first met Tank in May the Best Pet Win!, season two's seventh episode.

Four (originally six) episodes later, Hearth's Warming Eve premiered.

Ponyville blanketed in snow is HWE's first shot.

Going by the post-Lesson Zero timeline, this means that Dash and Tank have spent at least one winter before. In other words, Dash would've already known Tank (and reptiles, period) needed to hibernate, would've undergone the grieving model once before, waited for Tank to wake up, will trust both Fluttershy's advice and the brumation cycle more, and won't supposedly be so ignorant of the situation.

Every single problem in this episode that I pointed out is traced to this line. Not even two minutes in, the narrative completely falls apart. Because of this piece of dialogue, the whole conflict isn't simply out of place timeline-wise. It's also forced and pointless. If Tanks for the Memories took place before Hearth's Warming Eve, then Dash's emotional dilemma would be somewhat justified; somewhat stupid, but also understandable. There's zero justification for her to act like this during the middle of the fifth.

Conclusion.

While past episodes like Hurricane Fluttershy, Sisterhooves Social, Sleepless in Ponyville, and Rarity Takes Manehattan operate a lot on playing with your emotions, the stakes were high enough to pull you into the conflict and make you swim in their horror or sorrow. Here, TftM operates on attempting to play some serious stakes, but it's immediately bogged down by a very conservative approach to death. In 1983, in response to actor Will Lee's death, Sesame Street killed off his on-screen character, Mr. Hooper, and approached the conflict with Big Bird as the child character; he presented the Five Stages of Grief like Dash, but the feelings are genuine, and part of that is how they didn't cut any corners. Conversely, the corner-cutting, poor continuity, lack of believability, and overall stupidity gutted Tanks's overall quality. In essence, Tanks for the Memories is twofold:

1. The most emotionally contrived episode since Magical Mystery Cure. Part of the season three finale's angle is the ability to feel sad for Twilight for accidentally putting herself, and especially all of Ponyville, in a problem with virtually no way out. But sloppy pacing makes the episode hold its breath with no way to exhale. Rather than feeling proud, the implications of Celestia knowing things can go terribly wrong if Twilight screwed up the incomplete spell and the complete role reversal of the cutie mark's purpose (changing it from something you choose to having your life predestined before birth) makes Twilight's accomplishments feel incredibly hollow.
2. The Nightmare Rarity arc of the show, except way better. In my Slice of Life analysis, I described how the little details inside Town Hall validated the wedding and Mayor Mare's speech. Like the comic arc, the little details in Tanks opened up huge questions regarding the show's continuity. Here, the little bits of detail also broke apart the ability to sympathize for a very sympathetic character in what was supposed to be a relatable, understanding conflict.

And that's a shame, consider there are a few good moments.

The creepy faces were either hilarious and creepy (the Grinch homage as Dash rubbed her hooves together) or emotional (Dash's close-up angry face).

The "Who's On First?" homage is both a great tribute to the famous skit and a hilarious meta parody to how Hasbro and DHX name their characters.

Fluttershy's blunt message to Rainbow Dash while she was at her most vulnerable sounds cold on the surface, but it's actually one of her best moments of the show. As she knows Dash better than anyone, she's the right pony to tell her the blunt truth and help her transition through the fourth and fifth stages. More importantly, it validates the morals she learned in both Putting Your Hoof Down and It Ain't Easy Being Breezies.

Unfortunately, the good moments are wasted in between a bunch of sloppy writing.