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Everything posted by Clod
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Tried not writing status updates about me hating life and stuff. Turns out that only left memes and shit attempts at being funny. Thought that maybe my status updates were always too depressing, and that's why people were ignoring them. Then I stop posting them, and nothing changes. So idk.
I'm kinda at a point now where I've completely kept everything to myself. Trying to keep a more generally positive "character" here, so I don't say anything here. Can't talk to my family, because I don't want to tell them that I wish I wasn't alive. I've got only two real friends. One that only comes online rarely and has a much shittier life than I do so I won't ever talk about it with him, and one in Canada who hasn't been talking to me as much recently and has her own shit to deal with anyway. And sorry to anyone if you're offended that I don't consider you a friend, but we don't really talk much and when we do it's a short sentence. Kyoshi would probably be the closest I've got here, and even that's really only because we've known each other for probably 4 and a half years. Anyway, I've got no one to go to. No one to talk to.
So you want a "status" update? It ain't going well. I never posted about it, but I failed out of yet another school. I can't get a job. I can't stand living with my family anymore. They're so disgusting. I won't go into further detail with that, but just know that living here has made me an absolute germophobe. Is that the right word? Idk. But I go through a lot of hand sanitizer just to feel somewhat clean. Any interests I had are fading. I just want to sleep forever. If I wasn't worried about hurting a few people I'd be gone already. Disappearing and being totally forgotten is ideal but impossible. I feel like a complete failure because I am one. Seeing anyone even slightly successful, even just people posting about graduating high school, makes me feel like shit. Because I failed two. I had two chances and I fucking threw them away. I feel like I don't even deserve another chance because I know I'll fuck it up again. That's what I always do.
I should probably start distancing myself from here too. I don't post anything meaningful anyway. I make maybe one actual post a month, the rest are shitty little status updates. Not like anyone will miss me. Probably wouldn't even notice if I did disappear.
So there's a post. I'm going to lay down now. Not sleep, just stare at a wall. Maybe listen to music. Metallica just released the AJFA deluxe edition.
Hope you didn't waste your time reading that. Sorry if you did. I just don't know what to do at this point.
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i miss the time before youtube on xbox one was fixed so ads in the middle of a video would never play
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Finally caught up with season 8!... But now there's a Christmas episode thing that I don't feel like watching because it's November.
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Found out that it isn't my controller hitting RT for no reason. My controller was disconnected but the thing I was watching still decided to fast forward with no input. So what on my Xbox is deciding it's time for RT to be pressed? This doesn't only happen while watching stuff either. I've been sitting on the Xbox home screen and it detected a RT press so it went down to the next section.
Oh well, guess that's probably just going to be something I deal with for the rest of my Xbox's life.
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got a headache that is just a small annoyance when i'm doing nothing, then if i move it's like "hey here's some pain asshole" and it's really fucking annoying
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yes of course. getting mad at the crying baby will fix everything.
10/10 parenting, good job guys.
"take your fucking formula and shut up" "stop" etc.
inb4 another depressed child
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Assassin's Creed is now free with Gold on Xbox 360. Guess I'll finally try it.
edit: i mean
*dubstep intro*
WHAT IS UP GAMER NATION?! GAMERDUDE72 HERE WITH SOME BRAND NEW GAMING NEWS FOR YOU! DON'T FORGET TO SMASH THE LIKE BUTTON AND SUBSCRIBE, AND CLICK THE NOTIFICATION BELL TO BE NOTIFIED EVERY TIME I UPLOAD. ALRIGHT, SO AS YOU KNOW EVERY HALF MONTH MICROSOFT ADDS ANOTHER GAME TO THEIR "GAMES WITH GOLD" LINEUP. AS IT IS FINALLY NOVEMBER, IT'S TIME FOR ANOTHER ONE. THE ONE I'M GONNA BE TALKING ABOUT TODAY IS ON THE XBOX 360. IT IS ONE THAT WE'VE BEEN ANTICIPATING FOR A WHILE NOW. THAT GAME IS ASSASSIN'S CREED. etc.
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RuneScape is an interesting thing. The current modern game is not doing very well. It doesn't have many players. The old one from 11 years ago, however, is doing great. It just got released for mobile and hit over 100k players at one time, and even got to 120k today. All while RuneScape 3 dies a slow death.
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stomachs be like:
i don't like this. eject.
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maybe if i try to fail, i'll fail at that too so really i'll succeed