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Shanks

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  1. Shanks
    Okey dokey I just had one soul crushing week I have enough rage to melt the safes at Fort Knox and it has been a while so it is time for another rant about my shitty dead end job. For those of you who haven't tuned in my manager Mr. Slash And Burn as I have called him for his amazing ability to completely and utterly fail at writing schedules which screws myself and everyone else over by not having enough help. Just last week he came up with the brilliant idea to give two keycarriers (low and mid ranked managers) off without having ANYONE cover for them which granted didn't affect me much but the higher ups at corporate sure didn't like and let him know that.
     
    But like the nice guy he is he blamed EVERYONE for it except himself by yelling at EVERYONE for EVERYTHING. He had a little chat with me this morning about how I am a big fat pathetic screw up who can't do anything right. Okay to be fair to him he didn't use those exact words, but he might as well have so for your reading pleasure I am going to provide for you a few snippets of his BS and my little rebuttles that I wanted to say so badly today that it hurts but kept my mouth shut.
     
    "When work the 7-4 shifts your section is a mess"
     
    Yes, it is because you don't schedule enough help up front so I as a backup checker in addition to already being a dairy clerk have to come up there every two fragging seconds. I have barely enough time to do anything and when I have to write an order I don't what the frag we even have back there which causes me to make mistakes.
     
    "You didn't do what I asked you to do, I face 90% of your section"
     
    Yes I did you lying piece of filth, you told me to face my section and I did granted I missed a few spots and that is my bad but you and I both know that while you did get the spots I missed that I am the one who got most of it. And yes getting the holes is important but so is getting the back room ready for the load, I know what is back there and what I need to do you can tell me if you think I should do something else instead first but you can try not being an ass about it.
     
     
    and my personal favorite...
     
    "You need to have a sense of urgency, if you can't cut it than I can find someone else who can"
     
    If I don't have a sense of urgency than can you please explain how I have the respect of nearly all my coworkers including most of the managers I work with current and in the past? And there is also the matter of overdoing myself on the job to such an absurd extent that I received 3 knee injuries that have taken me out of work for a couple of weeks each, one of them taking me out for an entire month. So with all due respect sir you can
     
    go fuck yourself
     
    and have a nice day.
  2. Shanks
    Okay ladies and gents it is time for another blog about you guess it work. I didn't get written up or anything and I haven't had any run ins with customers lately but there is something coming up that I of course am not looking forward to. As 2nd dairy clerk I am in charge whenever the 1st is off or on vacation meaning that two days a week I work 7am-4pm which aren't the most pleasant days of my week but they are tolerable. Don't get me wrong folks, I wake up early anyway so it is not that that I hate about those shifts it is that alot more is expected of me. Next week my partner in crime will be going on vacation meaning that I will be in charge the whole week which is not going to be fun, when I went on vacation back in June he only had 1 day off of course the good news is since then me and him have been training a 3rd whose training is coming along rather nicely. He learns quick, has a good attitude and an excellent work ethic but he will need a bit more training before he is ready to be the opening dairy clerk on my days or possible only day off that week.
     
    Due to my history of knee injuries and my recent back problems I am going to have to be extremely careful this next week, the last thing I need is another damned injury. Trust me ladies and gents, you do not want to deal with workers comp. They treated me so badly during my 3rd knee injury that I almost sued them, and I am not exactly the most litigious person either so you really have to piss me off to make me considering sueing your ass. It is partly due to these injuries and the fact that I don't want to be in charge that I am a 2nd and not a first, as a matter of fact I actually trained the current 1st dairy clerk after the last one was transferred to another store in the district.
     
    He is doing a good job, but him and I can occasionally butt heads on exactly how much or how little it is appropriate to order as he prefers to go a tad lighter and I prefer to go a tad heavier especially on yogurt. Perhaps in some odd way we balance each other out, in a way I am the Applejack to his Rainbow Dash or I suppose with the ordering it may be the other way around.
     
    So for that week I won't be on here nearly as much, on those shifts I check up on things real quick before I leave and I of course will catch up at night but will probably avoid the more controversial topics as I will be too exhausted to even care anyway. If I am in any way cranky or irritable during this time than I apologize in advance. Until then I am going to enjoy this one last week I have before I am the big boss.
  9. Shanks
    So it has been a couple of weeks since Easter though you wouldn't know that if you were one of my fellow coworkers, soon after business slowed down a bit as it always does after a major holiday (except for the day after which for some unknown reason was ridiculously busy) but because some jackass thought it was a brilliant idea to have inventory day the Tuesday after Easter it didn't even matter. The store always looks like shit after a holiday and I am often stuck will enough back stock to feed the whole fragging town because the warehouse sent me way more than I actually needed but hey my job isn't hard enough anyway.
     
    Unfortunately that slowdown didn't last very long, customers are back and back with a vengeance things have been so unexpectedly busy this last week or so that it is literally just as busy now as it was in the weeks leading up to Easter. No really, I am not joking I Pinkie promise while Easter is not nearly as busy as Thanksgiving and Christmas it can still of course get busy. And as things get busy the likelihood of my loads actually arriving on time drops like a rock, I have had at least 3 loads this week arrive late on me. My milk load yesterday was on time but my wall load (yogurt, cheese, juice, eggs ect) was 4 hours late, with the unusually large amount of 6 wheelers in the back room I seriously lucked out big time. I may not have been able to work very much of it, but I was at least able to stack it off and get things ready for the next days milk load which is one of the largest of the week.
     
     
    To make matters worse Mr Slash and Burn my boss who has screwed me countless times by cutting hours so much that it is often nearly impossible for me to get anything done is doing it yet again. This time he is doing it by having my only help go home early multiple times this week while I stay even though he wants to stay far far more than I do and because he is lower on the pay scale than I am having him stay makes a lot more sense in terms of saving labor than having me stay. I know it gets me some extra cash but some things like my own sanity for example are far more important than money. I am seriously look forward to June as that is when I am going to take my vacation as I will probably need a bit of a break before we get into the 4th of July.
  11. Shanks

    That Was a Craptastic Week

    By Shanks,

    Okay ladies and gents it is story/rant time this time about last week and a little chunk of this week. First lets fast forward to the Sunday before last, I go celebrate my cousins birthday with my family, have some cake eat some Mexican food and have a pretty decent time but I start to see some little signs that I may be getting the flu. The next day I feel like I got hit by a mack truck I rarely ever get sick but when I do it is never just a normal flu it is always Bronchitis a few years ago I got so gravely ill that I was sent to intensive care and they had to shove a tire inflator down my throat so I could breathe. Okay so I exaggerated just a little with that one but I did have to use and inhaler which brought back some lovely memories of having a nasty case of Asthma in my younger years. Of course I had the exact same symptoms as that time except not nearly as bad (thank God) but still not fun.
     
    It didn't take long for me to figure out that I should just go home as even the simplest task had me gasping for breath and I was so weak I could barely even lift a box but I had to pull an Applejack and stay my entire shift.
     
    So for the next two days after that I was off which was a blessing as I was so weak and sick that I stayed in bed all day and only got up to shower, go the bathroom, eat and maybe go onto the forums for a little bit. I slept for 10, 12 hours a night and slept even more most of the day yet I was still completely and thoroughly drained, Eating which is normally one of my favorite activities was extremely painful and unpleasant, my breathing difficulties which were bad enough became a lot worse when I tried to eat so I often stopped eating when I was still hungry because I couldn't take the pain anymore.
     
    Thursday I was supposed to come in at 7AM but knew that there was no way I would possibly be able to handle a shift like that so I called in sick Wednesday night. When Friday rolled around I came back to work for a day and my God did it suck, yes I was getting better but I was still very weak and had another 7AM shift the next morning so I expressed some concerns about that. So I was let off the hook and didn't have to work the next day and I was off Sunday anyway like I usually am so I had the weekend.
     
    So I come back Monday and find a rather nasty surprise, 2 pallets of Minute Maid punches meaning of course that they would go on add Wednesday and take up my entire cooler the whole damn time like they always do. Seriously I can't even put into words how much I hate those fucking things, I really seriously do. So I had to spend half of my shift down stacking at least one of the pallets so I would have room for the next mornings milk load which because we were out of EVERYTHING was going to be at least 2000 pieces (yes you heard that right). Lifting all those boxes which normally wouldn't be a big deal for me left me seriously winded and I was ready to go home, but because there wasn't enough checkers and we had a rush I had to stay until things calmed down.
     
    I was so exhausted I could barely think straight and I had customer after customer rushing through my line while all I wanted to do was run out the door and never look back. Even if I wasn't struggling not to hack up a lung I still wouldn't want to stick around because I hate being up there and I had to be at work at 7AM the next morning and wanted to eat my dinner and get some rest.
     
    So the next day I have to deal with the monster milk load which I mentioned earlier, sure because everything was so empty it was a lot easier to count and fit in the cooler but due to immense size of it just how many holes there were on the shelf and the fact that I was still weak from my flu it took me 3 hours to break down and work it which it usually only take 1 hour and a half hour for 1 day milk loads. I wasn't even half way through my shift and I felt like I went a few rounds with Muhammad Ali. I don't know how I found the time but I was somehow able to finish all the repack, send in a pretty decent wall order for today (yogurt, cheese, juice ect....) and at least be able to change out the bottom two shelves of the big end which got rid of some of those accursed punches.
     
    So now I have the next couple of days off and am for the first time actually starting to feel normal again, I still have a bit of a cough am still congested and still have breathing difficulties but I am at least over the worst of this, So I am going to get my rest and take care of a few things before Friday when I get another 7AM shift of course by then I should be fine.
  15. Shanks
    Okay everyone, just for kicks I am going to do a series of blogs giving a little analysis on each of the major characters in MLP and a few secondary characters and even the occasional background pony. I first decided to begin this project with the best pony, Applejack oh did I mentioned that Applejack is best pony? Because that is kind of important. Okay okay so I will try to be as non biased as I can with these but you are going to get my 2 bits as well after all.
     
    Applejack dosen't have very many haters but there are quite a few people that think she is a boring character because of a perceived lack of defining traits. Part of this is because though she is in alot of episodes there aren't as many focusing directly on her as there are for most of the other characters. Though thanks to the Apple Family Reunion and Spike at Your Service episodes in season 3 people are taking a second look at her. She is not as hyperactive as Pinkie Pie, dosen't have the OCD like qualities and slight anal retentiveness of Twilight Sparkle isn't a drama queen like Rarity dosen't have the shyness or quite as many fears as Fluttershy or the brash arrogance of Rainbow Dash but in my own humble opinion is still an interesting character.
     
    I think the genius in her as a character is her simplicity Applejack is perhaps the closest thing the series has to average person or pony in this case yet still has a compelling story to tell. As the middle child of three siblings after her parents passed away she has to grow up much faster than most ponies by acting not only as a sister figure to Applebloom but also a mother and had to take the reigns of the family business of Sweet Apple Acres apple orchard along with her older brother Big Macintosh. Hard working and representing her element of honesty quite well she can sometimes push herself way too hard and is often stubborn and often reluctant though in recent episodes a bit less so to ask for help.
     
    And though she isn't as detail oriented as Rarity or Twilight Sparkle she can sometimes as she has done in the Apple Family Reunion episode for example try too hard and fail to see the big picture. To me this was very touching as I felt much of this was driven by a desire to honor her parents memory by making the reunion one everyone could be proud of. Applejack is very set in her ways which can be both a good and a bad thing, it is a good thing because she has some strong old fashioned values which I think far too many of us have forgotten like pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps and earning your way. Being honest, faithful and keeping your word not only to your friends and family but to everyone else even the Flim Flam Brothers as she has said "a deal is a deal." It is also a bad thing because she is often very stubborn and has a difficult time admitting when she is wrong and also has a slight temper. And she was the quickest to side with the Appaloosans and the most reluctant to listen to the buffalo and was the one with the notable exception of Pinkie Pie that judged Zecora the most harshly in Bridle Gossip.
     
    Applejack may be a simple farmer, but she is proof that simple does not always have mean bland or boring. Even when she is acting as the voice of reason she is a varied, interesting and compelling pony that just happens to sell apples and apple accessories (I couldn't resist making that joke).
  16. Shanks
    So like many others when I first heard about the possibility of Twilight Sparkle becoming an alicorn I greeted it with no small amount of trepidation. Lets face it this is one of those things that could either be really really good or really really bad. The bad is obvious, and that is Twilight becoming a Mary Sue character where she is essentially given a permanent god mode with not nearly enough time and development easing into it making it the series ultimate deus ex machina. Of course I have said in many cases that I am not entirely opposed to Twilight eventually, eventually being the key word becoming an alicorn. Though I would rather have such a change saved for toward the end of the series even I recognize the potential good.
     
     
    The good of course being that if done properly it could have some significant growth in Twilight as a character as it could teach her about the responsibilities of being a ruler (they are airing commercials about a coronation contest after all *hint hint*) and about keeping ones life in proper balance. She has improved in this regard throughout the series but still needs some work, she has learned to socialize and make friends when before the series began she did not see any of this as important.
     
     
    If done right even if she has a major growth in power she will need to do extensive study and training to learn to control it which could be stretched for several seasons. Even if done badly there is a good chance that we will learn more about alicorns such as how one can become an alicorn and whether or not some ponies are born alicorns or if all of them are immortal (or just incredibly long lived) like Celestia and Luna and we could learn more about Celestia and Luna.
     
    While I am still nervous about this and how it could make or break the series, for now I will wait and see and after it happens I will of course share my thoughts. Even if the worst happens and Twilight Sparkle is Mary Sued into oblivion I will still be a brony because even if the show is ruined there is still at least the fanart, fanfics and the community.
  17. Shanks
    Another crappy day at work another blog/rant about it. Tuesdays for me automatically suck, since it is add change day I have to worry about changing out the cold ends, breaking down and working a 2 day milk load and ordering the wall load (all the other stuff in the dairy department besides milk) for the next day since I am usually covering for the first dairy clerk that day (I am #2) and one other day that week. But this particular Tuesday sucked even worse, because my milk load came not 1, not 2, not even 3 but
     
    4 HOURS LATE!!!!
     
    Eeeeeeeyup thats right, and to make matters worse I was behind from the second I walked in because of those goddamn minute maid punches are going on sale tomorrow and that means that we get sent so much that it takes up half the cooler. Since I was off yesterday my #1 had to break down and organize that and the rest of the load himself which again thanks to those accursed punches was a tad harder than usual. So to make a long story short things looked like shit, granted not the worst I have seen it but it sure didn't help. Basically for most of my day my frame of mind was something like this
     
    http://youtu.be/4hT-b-iz83A
     
    Oh okay, so maybe I exagerated a little bit there but this was this one shift I had a few months back where they kept calling me to the torture chamber err I mean checkstands when I was trying to order the fragging load and well I was so pissed I really did start to hear voices in my head for a second there especially after one of the CSR's (front end supervisor) called me up because she wanted her ticket to the head of the line to get her crap for her break (yeah seriously).
     
    No my frame of mind was more like this
     

     
    Of course the obvious difference is I am not an office worker but I think you get the point. Fast forward after I finished breaking down and working the milk load thanks to the help of the receiver (back room manager) who seriously saved my ass today and I am about to send the order. So Iook on the computer and find that it said that I ordered 546 cases when I order 326 cases and thought WTF? So I scrambled to get a manger to help me and it turns out I was so stressed out that I forgot to even upload the order to the computer and that "load" I was looking at was inventory from yesterday.
     
    Of course that ate up some time so I spend the last 2 hours of my shift setting up the cold ends in record time, I couldn't finish everything because there were some things that I had to order that will come in tomorrow but this is yet another day I am glad is over.
  18. Shanks
    Okay ladies and gents I have seen a couple of Lyra fans make blogs similar to this so I figured why the hell not. As many of you know my first choice was Applejack but since that orchard has been picked over by Lyra I am backing my second choice Twilight Sparkle and Octavia. I of course understand the appeal of Lyra and to be honest if the final round ends up being between Lyra and Fluttershy I will probably join the dark side and vote for Lyra but if it is Octavia then she will get my vote.
     
    Lets start with Octavia, as a musician myself that kind of adds some bonus points for me but that is not all folks. Octavia seems to have this natural confidence about her that dosen't seem to cross too much into arrogance and has this classy sort of sexy that seems to work without being too overly pretentious.
     
    Twilight Sparkle has that sexy librarian vibe and adorkable quality to her that I find irresistible. She can over think things at times and has some OCD like qualities but aside from Applejack I find Twilight Sparkle to be the most compelling of the Mane 6 and her character design just works on so many levels the color, her mane and her cutie mark.
  19. Shanks

    Mane 6 Lightsaber Combat

    By Shanks,

    I just thought I would indulge both the brony and hard core Star Wars fan in me for a second and just add my thoughts on which lightsaber combat forms would best fit the Mane 6. For those of you that don't know there are 7 forms of lightsaber combat in the Star Wars universe and though they are not mentioned by name in the movies they are in multiple expanded universe works and are considered canon.
     
    http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Lightsaber_combat
     
    Pinkie Pie: Form I known as Shii Cho best fits her because it is known for being extremely random and unpredictable with its broad sweeping motions and unconventional tactic of completely letting lose of control. All jedi padawans learn this form first but few have truly mastered it and one of those few is Kit Fisto who was the jedi that aside from Mace Windu lasted the longest against Darth Sidious when the jedi council tried to arrest him.
     
    Rarity: Form II known as Makashi best suits Rarity as it is the most elegant of all lightsaber forms. Based heavily on classical fencing it focuses on fancy footwork and efficiency of movement, it was invented to counter lightsaber wielding opponents but is weak against blaster wielding opponents and more strength based lightsaber combat forms but can be compensated with through extensive training. The most well known practitioner of this lightsaber combat form is Count Dooku.
     
    Fluttershy: From III known as Soresu best suits Fluttershy as it was invented by jedi who preferred to take a more passive/defensive approach to lightsaber combat for fear of more aggressive forms leading them to the dark side. Its defense is solid but its offense is sorely lacking and because of this is often combined with other lightsaber forms to compensate for this. Obi Wan Kenobi who is the most well known practitioner of this studied Soresu with the intend of making a hybrid form of it and Form IV ataru which his master Qui Gonn Gin specialized in.
     
    Rainbow Dash: Form IV known as Ataru best suits Rainbow Dash because it is the most heavily focused of all lightsaber combat forms on speed and force assisted acrobatics. It and Form V were invented by jedi Soresu masters who wanted to address the lack of offense in Soresu. The best known practitioners of Ataru are Qui Gon Gin and Master Yoda, Master Yoda used this form to compensate for his small stature and turn what is ordinarily a weakness into a strength.
     
    Applejack: Form V known as Shien/Djem so best fits Applejack because it is one of the most physically demanding of all lightsaber combat forms. It builds on the strong defense of Soresu and also provides and equally devestating offense. Shien was made to counter blaster wielding opponents while Djem so was made to counter lightsaber wielding opponents. Lighstsaber duelists who are tall and have large reserves of brute strength such as Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker and Darth Bane often favor this form.
     
    Twilight Sparkle: For VI known as Niman best fits Twilight Sparkle as it is most often used by consular jedi who often focus more of the intellectual side of the jedi order as opposed to jedi guardians who see alot of combat. It was invented by jedi consulars who saw Ataru and Shien/Djem so as too aggressive and close to the dark side. It combines moves from all previous lightsaber forms into a basic easy to learn style that also make its easy to chain force based attacks into lighstaber combat sequences. Though some such as the fallen jedi turned sith named Exar Kun took this lightsaber combat form above and beyond what was intended and became true jacks of all trades.
     
    I know the last one is a variation of Fluttershy but I had an extra spot and had to fill it
     
    Flutterbitch: Form VII known as Juyo/Vaapad best suits Flutterbitch because it is the most aggressive and deadly both of lightsaber combat forms both to its victim and user. Juyo can best be described as the lightsaber combat version of a berserker rage mode, its uses ones inner darkside to greatly amplify strength, speed, endurance and force aptitude. It is like Ataru and Djem So had a very evil vicious child from the darkest bowels of hell except with it lacking the strong defense of Djem So. Juyo was later refined by Jedi master Mace Windu to address the lack of defense and to try to allow the user to still tap into their inner dark side while not succumbing to it, he trained two of his padawans Sora Bulq and Depa Billaba in Vapaad but they succumbed to their inner dark side.
  20. Shanks
    So yesterday I said my day today was going to suck and though it wasn't exactly a picnic it was at least not as bad as I feared. I wasn't in the checkstands very much because in large part because it was one of the slowest days I have seen in a good while so I actually got a chance to get something done. Since I have been on vacation all last week I knew I was going to find a lot of out of short coded milk when I did my morning milk rotation but 30, that's right 30 half gallons was more than even I expected to find but at least there was only 3 gallons that were out. Of course the gallons and half gallons following a 6 day rotation (have to be pulled 6 days before they go out of code) of course didn't help matters.
     
    I know it sounds a bit excessive but you would be surprised how often milk can spoil before it even goes out of code, this happens because sometimes air gets in the container and causes it to spoil faster than it would otherwise with other products this is easy to spot but with milk it can appear just fine and still have this problem. My milk load showed up late but it was a fairly small load especially for a two day order, it must have been no more than 850 pieces when our usual is typically about 1000 and some of the bigger ones can run around 1200.
     
    Since the first dairy clerk has not been ordering enough there was practically no repack which can be a good thing but with how many holes there was on the shelf in this case was not good so I had no choice but to order a lot more than usual for a one day order (this was especially the case with the yogurt and juice) and order a few extra add items to put on the big end which is fairly typical anyway. The lack of repack at least gave me a chance to change out the cold ends and get my section ready for tomorrows new add,
     
    I am off tomorrow so unless by some chance they call me in, the larger than normal load is not going to be my problem.
  21. Shanks
    This isn't the most exciting entry I have made but since I didn't get much sleep the other night and am a bit bored I am not at my best today.
     
    Since I am a second dairy clerk I sometimes have to be at work at 7AM on the first dairy clerks days off or if he goes on vacation and it is a lot easier for me to get good sleep if I keep a consistent sleep schedule but I have a few other reasons.
     
    1. I don't really do much at night anyway: I hate crowds and loud noises so bars and other places active at night just don't really appeal to me. And since I take the bus and bus schedules are a tad limited where I live I couldn't do much even if I wanted to. I am more likely to stay up late going to a midnight release at Gamestop which has been on my bucket list for a while rather than stay up late at some bar drinking myself into barely even remembering my own name.
     
    2. To quote Pinkie Pie in this one fanfic I read "more sun means more fun." And it also means more time to take care of any errands or other responsibilities. This became really apparent to me when I used to work 4am shifts, it took some getting used to but once I did I loved all the extra time I had during the day.
     
    3. I am at my most creative and productive during that time: whether it is working on a youtube video, writing a fanfic or writing this book I am hoping to get published my brain seems to like the morning and early afternoon hours for some reason.
     
    and
     
    4. I sleep better and overeat less: when I stay up late I get a bit bored sometimes and when that happens I sometimes go for the snacks.
  22. Shanks

    Buck Yeah It's Party Time

    By Shanks,

    Today is the day, today is the day that the day the day that...
     
    I START MY VACATION!!!
     
    Okay, so technically tomorrow is the day it starts but since I am off today anyway I might as well just count that as the start. And you know that means fillies and gentlecolts? That means that it's
     
    PARTY TIME
     

     
     
    I get one week, one week away from the God forsaken hellhole I call work that is slowly eating away at my sanity and I am going to love and tolerate the hell out of it I Pinkie promise.
  23. Shanks

    Operation Exodus

    By Shanks,

    If you have paid attention to most of my blog posts you probably know that I don't like my job the good news though is that I do have a solid plan for getting out of there which I have full faith in. I could simply get another job but as Big Macintosh would put it "nnnnnnooooope" that is not for me. If I got another job I would probably take a pay cut as I would be starting from the bottom would probably have to put up with the same BS again and might not have the same benefits at the other job that I have at my current one. I could also go back to school and I might take a few classes to simply to give myself something else to focus on other than stewing in the hellhole I call work but my grades have gone so far down the toilet because of Math kicking my butt and other responsibilities and not to mention tragedies I have had over the years that I am a little nervous about going back.
     
    One of those responsibilities was to help take care of my sick father who was a dialysis patient which was especially difficult in his last year of life as his condition deteriorated quickly. The bottom line was his body couldn't take it anymore and he passed away last March, while it wasn't nearly as difficult to deal with as previous deaths I have had in the family in large part because I had years to prepare for it and I am glad he is no longer suffering I miss him more than I could ever put into words.
     
    My exit strategy is to become an author which as my research has indicated is not easy, but I have a major ace in the hole. As I have mentioned in some of my blog posts and other posts on this forum I have a mild form of Autism but it wasn't always this mild. When I was first diagnosed at age 2 I lost what little language I had and didn't regaing it back until I was 5 and had severe behavioral problems and extreme sensitivities to certain sounds. To make a long story short years of therapies, interventions and an overall process of gradual mainstreaming into society have my condition to the point where most people cannot even tell I have Autism.
     
    I may not be completely "cured" as my experiences in the checkstand have painfully reminded me of but I have advanced to the point where I am a relatively productive and successful adult yet I still feel like a failure a lot of times. Next Saturday the 19th is going to be my 27th birthday and for far too long I feel like I have let my life pass me by, being an angry bitter depressed adult constantly griping about how much his job and his life sucks is not how I imagined my life would be at this point. But though I have vented on here which has helped a little but if I spend the rest of my life feeling sorry for myself that all the hard work and sacrifice by both myself and my family to get to this point will all be for nothing.
     
    I have originally intended my first book to be an autobiography but decided to save that for later in large part because my autobiography is going to be a trilogy and my research indicates that publishers are more reluctant to agree to publish a series if you are a new author. Why I decided to make it a trilogy is both because I have a lot to say and it would give me time to build up to the more recent years and be able to mention certain things that happened at work without having to worry about getting fired from a job I would no longer need.
     
    My first book will be more like a self help book, it will detail my different opinions on all sorts of different subjects relating to Autism and will have advice gearing toward parents with Autistic children, teenagers and adults with Autism and everyone else. My brother has offered to help me edit it and my Mother suggested that she could maybe write a few things from her perspective and maybe get my aunt to say a few words too. It will serve its purpose of getting my foot in the door to write my autobiography and eventually allow me to break out into other subjects I am interested in writing about such as philosophy, politics or possibly fiction.
     
    If this plan works and I have confidence that it will as I have done public speaking on the subject before and my speeches have been extremely popular, add to this all the connections my mother has from all of her years of activism in the Autism community and a relative in the movie industry (yeah really, no lie I pinkie promise) and my chances are pretty good. I will be able to help myself and others, it sounds pretty win win to me.
  24. Shanks
    If you have been paying attention to most of my entries they have been rather depressing, I got written up at work the other day because of too many screw ups in the checkstand and am barely keeping myself together for the first time in too long though I think I am finally catching a break. Since I have a mild form of Autism I may actually be able to go back to the way things were before I became a backup checker and just be a dairy clerk.
     
    I know I have been bad mouthing my company and of course mean every word of it but despite all the enemies I have made there I also have some pretty powerful allies, one of those allies believe it or not was the company hatchet man at my suspension hearing back in June. I first met him a few months before that unpleasantness occurred when he interviewed me as part of an investigation into this manager I once worked with who has been accused of multiple labor law violations and other abuses of power. Apparently he felt that I dealt with the situation in a dignified and professional manner and was impressed by me as a person and employee, much of this impression was in part due to the influence of a district manager who before she was promoted was the same manager that hired and promoted me.
     
    This man apparently may be able to pull some strings and get me out of the checkstands on the condition that I get a doctors note if that works out I will not have to step down and become a General Merchandise Clerk again to avoid getting the inevitable boot from too many checkstand mistake or worse losing my temper. My current manager doofus of course dosen't understand this and dosen't want to understand but with that man behind me and the recent write up having the union seeing red I am going to enjoy seeing him squirm.
     
    If only more of the company higher ups were like that guy then I wouldn't have such a problem with them, but things often happen for a reason the fact is that I was never meant to spend the rest of my life there and I now know that I have to for the sake of my sanity implement my plan to get out of there. And while I am still on the subject of good news I just have a few more days before I can unwrap my birthday present to myself, my vacation.
     
    Of course I can't let this make me complacent though as reliable sources indicate that this whole checkstand fiasco is part of a plan to get rid of me, to cover my ass I can't go into details about what I did to piss off the higher ups so much but if that is the case then this won't be the last time they try something. All I am going to say was, I did what I thought was right and took the heat for it. Luckily before that whole mess my record was perfect, I had no write ups, warnings or blotches of any kind and was well respected by even most of the managers I worked with.
     
    So long as I keep on doing that with the allies I have gathered in my corner, I can keep my job until I find a way to get out of there and even if the worst happens than it just means that my time there is up and I need to move on with my life.
  25. Shanks

    F*@#

    By Shanks,

    Me and my potty mouth go back a ways and I have gotten in trouble from it many times before, I am not in any trouble from it that I am aware of this time but I am trying to do something about before that becomes the case. Yesterday my mother was a bit upset with me because apparently my aunt who occasionally shops at the store I work at told my mother that she overheard me swearing under my breath while I was up in the 9th circle of hell (the checkstands).
     
    Though I honestly truthfully don't remember swearing while up in the check stands and am even willing to make that a Pinkie Promise I have come pretty close to it and have on some occasions have done some swearing under my breath without even realizing it so it is possible that I may have done so while in the checkstands. And it is also possible that someone may have misheard one of the various swear substitute words I often use while up there. That and when I hear "Jerry check up front please" it is often followed by me saying "shit" "damn it" or some other expletive. And my manager caught me swearing once after I dropped something and I didn't get a write up or anything but he did tell me not to use "vulgar language".
     
    Of course what really pissed me off about that conversation with my mother is that she automatically assumed that those comments under my breath were insults to the customers I was dealing with. And while I will admit there are some customers who I would love and tolerant having my fist in their face even I have enough restraint not to say anything about them at least until they are on their merry way.
     
    I understand that she is worried about me and dosen't want me to get canned but I can't believe it didn't occur to her that it might be the situation at large and not just whatever customer I am dealing with that has me so pissed off. My primary duty is supposed to be that of a dairy clerk so I have to worry about what goes on back there and up front which is ridiculous.
     
    I have even made the occasional joke or two when something went wrong, about a month or two ago when my checkstand started making a weird noise I asked one of the checkers next to me "how do I shut this thing up? I left my baseball bat at home, can I borrow yours?" And one time while I was in the checkstands when the milk load was being delivered and the assistant manager asked if the truck driver was still there I replied "if he is than he probably died of old age waiting for me to come back." So yes I have let a little bit of my inner smart ass out up there and have had a situation or two where I freaked out a big but none of my freakouts involved spewing expletives.
     
    But can you really blame me ladies and gents? BS is not my first language, if I do a fake smile I end up looking like a pedophile (neat that rhymes) or like Ren did in that one episode of Ren and Stimpy with the Happy Happy Joy Joy song.
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