First OC - Thoughts?

[~Master~ Button Mash 2,307]

This is my first OC.

 

http://mlpforums.com/page/roleplay-characters/_/cirrus-r2061

 

He's basically meant to be an allegory of the human quest for flight. Since the dawn of time, man has stared into the heavens and dreamed of soaring amongst the skies with the creatures blessed with wings of their own. Unfortunately, we aren't born with wings, so we forged our own. And from our humble beginnings 109 years ago, we've gone from hopping across a small field in Kittyhawk, NC to exploring the heavens beyond our world.

 

Such is the story of Cirrus, a pegasus who was born without wings. However, the call of the skies was strong in him, so he did the only thing he could do, and like humanity, he forged himself a set of wings.

 

So, is he...kosher? For lack of a better term? I've never RP'd before, but I'm familiar with concepts to be avoided, like Mary Sue qualities or making the character overpowered. I'd like to think he's believable. He still has a lot of struggles to overcome. He's only just begun to fly, and he is still struggling to overcome the insecurities caused by that (along with being a blank flank for so long). He's meant to also be developing a bit of a hubris streak, which will cause him some troubles in the future as he still learns to fly but occasionally bites off more than he can chew (things like that can be hatched out in RP).

 

Sorry if I'm overthinking this. I originally created him for use somewhere else that had much more stringent RP requirements (never actually RP'd there, thought, just made a character while I was there) and I'm still in that "mode" so to speak.

 

EDIT:

 

*facehoof*

 

 

 

Just noticed the OC opinion thread. I feel like a moron now.

 

Mods, if you want, I can just move Cirrus over there and this thread can be locked.

Edited December 4, 2012 by Sky Nomad