HOPE

[Phoenix237 353]

I feel the need to tell this story. I have seen befor many bronies out there who seem to be suffering from depression and many who are in troubled times. I see this and think of ways to help. I feel the best way is by telling a story about myself and that we should never lose hope. There is a chance that no one may hear me or read this. There is a chance that no one may care. BUT as long as even one person out there has been affected or helped by this, I know I did right.

 

HOPE

Up to couple of months ago this word ment little or had no meaning for me. I had no hope for either me or others. I had no hope for love or friends.

Let me start at the beginning which would be all the way back to my middle school years. My elementary years were great, but it was when I entered 3rd grade that problems began. I was bullied, left out of groups, and never left alone. Why? Because I my ethnicity (I'm Hispanic in case anyone is wondering and in US). I was treated harshly at such a young age and felt like there was no reason to live on. But I had a friend. There was only one person in that school who would talk to me and help me in my time of need. Our freindship was strong dispite the bullying we got. Me for my ethnicity and him for being my friend. Dispite the crap we got we were happy because we had each other. Looking back our freindship was as strong as the freindship I see in the in the show even though we were both male.

 

But then tragedy struck. He died in an accident and I was left alone again. My only freind gone from this world. This isn't what led me to lose hope. What caused me to lose hope for humanity is that no one in my school cared. The students acted like jerks and said things like "where's your friend today, couldn't make it after his accident?" How they knew? The school made an anouncment to alert parents and teach kids about accidents and that kind of thing. It was this moment in time when I lost all hope. As years went on things became worse. By 8th grade most people kept telling stories how they had a crazy party with drugs, alcohol, etc. Some I believe lost their verginity at such a young age. In one of our pool parties someone brought a Knife. You probably think I'm lying, but unfortunately for me it was true. If you still don't believe me i don't realy care or mind if you claim im lying, I know the truth. I never succumbed to their ways as I made a promise to never become like them. I trusted no one and never let anyone know about me. I didn't start to try to make freinds until Senior year of high school when I started to trust people a bit. Thats how messed up I was. I was unfortunately inexperienced and thus didn't make any real freinds. I saw them in school, but never outside of school. I graduated High school never having had another real friend, never having had a girlfriend, and never having had a time were I felt happy.

 

Currently I'm 19 years old and in college. I don't have any real freinds and never had a girlfriend in my life.

 

So. Why didn't I end it years ago? Why did I move on with my life when I felt alone? Why am i still here today? The reason is my friend wouldn't have wanted me to end my life. He would have wanted me to move on. We were young, but he was smart. He once said to me after I asked why he is happy when everyone is putting us down "Because I have reasons to be happy and you have them too". After the accident I didn't know what this was. It wasn't until my end of junior year when I heard a similar message. It was in greater detail, and more impacting. What I heard was:

"life isn't easy and sometimes that makes it look like it isn't worth living in. We tend to look at the bad, but in doing so we forget something important. We forget about the good in our lives and miss out on what is important to us. Yes. Sometimes even our lives at home isn't better then the life outside. But things can get better. We can achive for something better and it is those drives that help us reach our goals. We must never lose the fact that we are alive and that life is full of beauty when one stops and pays attention. We must not lose sight of our dream for it is these that give us joy. And above all never lose HOPE."

 

These words touched me. I looked backed and realized I did have something worth living for. My family. My younger sibilings may fight a lot, but they are the best sibilings I could ever ask for. Especially my younger sister who is the kindest person I ever met. My parents have always been understanding and supportive of me. I never realized it befor, but they gave me guidance in my time of need, and helped me move on with my life. I realized that I'm not the only one who had it rough, hell some people had it worse. Yet dispite this they conquered their problems and moved on to a better life.

 

 

I may be 19 years old. I may never have had a real friend or a girlfriend, but that hasn't stopped me from trying to move on with my life.

 

 

Currently I'm trying to be more social in hopes of having a friend. For me it helped that I found other bronies (not lying) that have made me feel welcomed. Its a Great start. I'm not trying to start a relationship any time soon since never had a girlfriend befor, but I may start when I get the hang of making freinds.

 

I used to be a depressed loner. I had no one. I didn't see the point in others because I trusted no one. Now I'm different. I'm still trying to make freinds. I'm still trying to get social skills. The important word is that I'm "trying" besides not doing anything.

 

I have HOPE that someday my life will get better. Do I still get lonely sometimes? Yes. But my HOPE that some day things will get better and my actions that I have taken to reach those goals more then makes up for this feeling of loneliness.

 

You see we're I'm going with this. Not everything in life is easy. It sure as hell hasn't been for me. But we must never lose sight of what's important for use. We must find the reasons that make our lives worthwhile and use our dreams to help use move on with our lives.

We must have HOPE.

 

Sorry if this has been long, but I needed to put in these details.

Edited January 8, 2013 by Phoenix237

[PinkiePai 181]

I know how you feel. I'm only 15 by the way. I never really had any friends in primary school. We used to talk a bit but you know, not really friends, just out of convenience. Then in 7th and 8th grade everyone started telling me I was weird, noone wanted to talk to me or anything. I was pretty depressed, and I would just lean against a wall and stare somewhere to avoid my classmates. I really hated them. But the thing is, I actually had better grades than all the guys in the class except for one other guy. All of them had D's and F's. More than half of guys in the class had an extension at the end of 8th grade, and they all went to shit schools. All the girls in the class were the smart and only-study type, they didn't even talk to the guys.

 

It really all changed when I went to high school. It was a fresh start, and I (hope) I picked a good school (computer technician, then college). Half of the school year is over, and I realized some things. My generations is Luna damn straight down stupid. The girls dress like sluts, half of them is still 14, they all drink, smoke and whatnot. They have ridiculously bad grades. They tell me like "Whaohaoah ur so smart omigawd", but actually I'm just average. They are the ones that are stupid as hell. I get good grades without studying a lot, I just pay attention in class and I get away with B's and A's easily. There are 4 other... Umm fairly smart guys in the class, and we hang out  during school. We don't really go anywhere outside of school, but it's a start. None of them are bronies, but hey, it's better than nothing. 

 

So yeah, I'm pretty happy with my life at the moment, and I have hope that it will be even better.

[The Stranger 812]

I just want to let you know that you're an awesome person. I got emotional when I was reading this because I could relate to so many things.

 

I lost a friend just like you. It happened almost two years ago. Her name was Natasha and she was the closest friend I had. I'm Greek and she was Indian. She had very hardcore parents who didn't approve of her boyfriend who was Spanish and they pulled every trick in the book to make them break up. During that entire year we'd spend our school days together. We'd eat lunch and go to class at the same time together. She had her problems and I had mine but we didn't let that bother us.

 

Our friendship was strong just like yours was with your friend. It didn't last though because one day she wasn't feeling good and decided to go sleep it off. Unfortunately while she was asleep her heart stopped and she died. I was heavily effected by this. I couldn't go to her funeral because I couldn't bear to see her dead body. It would of made me pass out.

 

When she past on I was all alone. I had no friends and I still don't. I go though college by myself. Not a single person in college has any time for me. I've been alone for over a year now and yes it's depressed me but I haven't given up. I have hope that my future will turn out better then the past years had been for me. I have hope. I write poetry to keep my mind busy and I listen to music to keep myself somewhat sane. I won't give up, the show must go on.

 

I feel like I've connected with you after I read your thread. Even if we end up remaining total strangers here on the MLP Forums I'm sending you a friend request because I respect you. Thank you for taking the time to write this thread. Yes most people here won't notice your thread but that doesn't matter. PinkiePai noticed and so did I. In my opinion that's good enough.  

Edited January 8, 2013 by Data Void

[CloudFyre 848]

Hey, if you ever need a friend, I'm totally up for that. You're words are refreshing to hear, and I don't know if I've ever seen someone with your strength of mentality before.

If you're ever bored/tired/lonely, feel free to hit me up on PM.

Edited August 26, 2016 by CloudFyre

[~Master~ Button Mash 2,307]

I can relate to you so much, my friend. I'm 19, too, and pretty much until my junior year of high school I was a loner, too. Since then I've made friends, and even had a few girlfriends. Believe me once you come out of your shell it gets a lot easier. You just need to be comfortable and confident in yourself. It might sound simple, but that's really all it takes. Before you can be friends with anyone else you need to be friends with yourself. Know what I mean? Not to mention it helps that, in general, people in college are more mature and adult than people in high school.

 

And it does pain me to see so much of our generation wasting its potential. In my current dorm hall I'm going to venture and say about 15-20% of my classmates won't be here next year. So many wasted minds...

 

But you know what? That's alright, because there will always be a light shining in the darkness. Little lights are what kept the world going since the dawn of man. The light is people like you, and everyone else here on MLPForums and in the Brony community as a whole. Even in the face of hate, discrimination, and sometimes even violence, we choose to love and tolerate. We choose to be honest with ourselves. We choose to be kind. We choose to be loyal. We choose to be generous and give back. We choose to laugh in the face of uncertainty and have hope for our future. See where I'm going with this?

Edited January 8, 2013 by StratoPegasus

[EnderBrony 26]

This post honestly made me tear up. I have been lucky enough to never have to experience this and hope I never have to but if there is one thing I must say is in the words of The Protomen "hope rides alone" which can mean many things but mostly I thought of it while reading this post. What it means to me is that hope doesn't have to be in the form of something great and big but it can even be as small as one person offering their help to another helpless person. In this case it was your one friend who even after he was gone...gave you hope. I offer you my friendship.

 

Peace off

BOOP!!!

[Scootalove 10,689]

I have felt my share of loneliness. I am 15 now and in high school, when I was in middle school I never really had any friends even though my mom told me to socialize, but even when I did I still didn't get any friends, I told her the school was bad. But she never listened to me, since I got seperated from my best friend due to different schools, I now feel empty inside. I came to this forum, to try to escape from my problems at school and home, I just feel that I will always be lonely forever. I really feel that, the only purpose I have in life is to make any of my friends happy. Anyway, if you need a friend send me a friend request anytime. I hope you do find friendship when I do. Loyalty & Respect will guide you.

[Phoenix237 353]

Reading these comments I know I helped someone out there. Life isn't easy I admit it, but we must never give up HOPE.

 

"Hope is what makes us strong. It is why we are here. It's what we fight with when all else is lost."

 

If anyone needs to talk or just wants to chat I'm here. Even If there is a time zone difference (I'm in US Arizona) and our conversation times may be limited, know that I will always try to respond as quickly as possible. That goes for everyone

 

My Skype account in case anyone wants it is:

Phoenix23714