adventure My first MLP fanfic - Aegis.

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Well, here's my first attempt at writing a MLP fanfic!

It's not great, but it's not bad for a first attempt in my opinion.

 

The story revolves around my OC (Hollow Aegis). It's around 930 words long, and I've written 1 chapter thus far.

 

Feedback is appreciated.

 

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/9945434/1/Mental-Trigger

 

 

(The previous name of the fanfic was Aegis, hence the topic title.)

Edited December 28, 2013 by Crimsonn

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I am going to finish it up and tell you what I think . I finished my own but I did not really get anyone to critique mine was probably a waste of my time in posting it on here.

I have to say the build up you have made in this story is awesome. From the point in which your OC murders that one pony then gets put into prison. You put a lot of detail with the emotions your oc was feeling which I enjoyed reading. I also really enjoyed the part where Celestia out of all ponies was questioning him and you left it at a cliffhanger. I favorited it and I do look forward to you writing more :3 i enjoyed what you wrote so far a lot.

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Thanks for that Ticking. 

 

I'll try finish the second chappy by next week. 

 

Staying in a hotel at the moment, so little time to write!