In my admittedly short time on this site, (Compared to some) I have noticed that administrators and moderators possess abilities that may seem strange or even otherworldly to new users. To help prevent any confusion or fear, I have decided to compile a complete list that details exactly how a moderator or administrator differs from the average user.

• Administrators can hide exactly how long they've been offline.
  
• Moderators can edit their posts, and it won't state that the post has actually been edited.
  
• Moderators can cause your computer to play the brown note with the push of a button.
  
• Moderators can smell fear.
  
• All site administrators are high ranking members of HYDRA. Hail HYDRA!
  
• Moderators can see you when you're sleeping, and they know when you're awake. They also know if you've been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake.
  
• Moderators devour the souls of the living for sustenance, as well as to maintain their eternal youth.
  
• If you are slain by an administrator, you come back to life as a moderator under their control.
  
• Moderators highly recommend that you drink the tap water. In fact, they say that you should go drink some right now.
  

Despite their near omnipotence, moderators and admins do have two weaknesses:

• If you type a moderator's username backwards, they will be immediately banished to their home dimension for up to a week. SCS is immune to this effect as his user name is spelled the same way backwards as it is forwards.
  
• If you say "I don't believe in moderators!" somewhere in the world a moderator will drop dead.
  

Disclaimer: This blog post is meant as a work of comedy, nothing more.