It's incredibly awkward and it makes me feel terrible. He doesn't know how to forgive me for my past mistakes that I sincerely regret (he thinks that I'm trying to justify what I did but I'm not trying to justify shit)
Just let it go, man. Theres nothing you can really do about it. There are alot of people who are friends with jerks, but it just goes to show you how people can react differently for different people. The kind friends are usually kind to the jerks they are friends with as well, so...