open Equestrian Cafe

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal smirked. "So if I ordered another cup of coffee, instead of a refill. It'd count to my bill?" She thought aloud, sounded weird to say, then again, having free refills still had it's grey areas for whether or not it was priced. "Interesting." She looked at her empty coffee mug. "I think I've had enough coffee to be honest." She pushed the mug further ahead, not too much, knowing that may cause it to fall. She turned around. "I'm also running out of things to talk about..." She gave the menu a look over one last time, wanting to try some more things. "Many of these things on the menu, I've had before from Ponyville and Canterlot restaurants. What makes them different here?" She internally sighed in relief, something to talk about, although it Might not last long as a subject.

 

"What makes it different is that it's actually good ​and worth eating. It's not some overprocessed dried out piece of garbage they pass off as food. Actual time and effort is put into makin' the food here. At least, that's what I heard from one of the critics after they tried some o' Zen's cooking. Despite getting four and a half stars, still nobody comes to this place though." Deadpan rambled, getting lost in the topic. This happened a lot.

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal shrugged. "Eh, at least you got me, a millionaire mystery book writer, willing to pay, some, money." She looked at Deadpan. "I can get use my support to recommend places like this, which from the food's taste, I would." She said looking at Deadpan with a smile. "Most of my fans that I know of work or live in Canterlot, so they'd enjoy a change of flavor in the food." She looked up at the menu. "Especially since it tastes bad." She looked to Deadpan, leaning on the counter using a hoof as a support. "I think I'd like to try one of those Hayburgers that you guys make."

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal shrugged. "Eh, at least you got me, a millionaire mystery book writer, willing to pay, some, money." She looked at Deadpan. "I can get use my support to recommend places like this, which from the food's taste, I would." She said looking at Deadpan with a smile. "Most of my fans that I know of work or live in Canterlot, so they'd enjoy a change of flavor in the food." She looked up at the menu. "Especially since it tastes bad." She looked to Deadpan, leaning on the counter using a hoof as a support. "I think I'd like to try one of those Hayburgers that you guys make."

 

"ZEN! WE GOT A HAYBURGER ORDER" Deadpan shouted. Zen nodded and teleported into the kitchen, then came back a few minutes later with a hayburger. "The Hayburger is Zen's specialty. She's REALLY good at 'em, trust me." he smiled.

 

"Deadpan, don't build them up like that. They aren't THAT great..." Zen smiled sheepishly, clearly not used to being the topic of a conversation, much less one of appraisal.

 

"C'mon, don't beef ​yourself up about it, Zen, your burgers are amazing!" Deadpan grinned.

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39, An audible slap could be heard, from Crystals hoof contacting her face. She didn't want to hurt his feelings again, so she didn't say a word about the pun, but it was probably obvious. "Yeah, plus I can give you the approval of that." Crystal added, trying not to wince at Deadpans joke, she looked to Deadpan. "Actually, if she bakes that..." She looked over the menu. "What do you help bake?" She asked pointing to Deadpan.

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39, An audible slap could be heard, from Crystals hoof contacting her face. She didn't want to hurt his feelings again, so she didn't say a word about the pun, but it was probably obvious. "Yeah, plus I can give you the approval of that." Crystal added, trying not to wince at Deadpans joke, she looked to Deadpan. "Actually, if she bakes that..." She looked over the menu. "What do you help bake?" She asked pointing to Deadpan.

"The pies, mainly..." Deadpan explained, the hurt look on his face clearly giving away he heard Crystals facehoof.

 

"Oh dear. He already has such an oddly low self esteem, yet he hides it with jokes and quips. Yet it seems he's a tad more...apparent when his jokes don't land as opposed to when everyone is laughing." Zen explained.

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal looked worried. "Come on." She looked at the counter. "Again?" She mumbled quietly to herself, it was almost too much, but, she was still there; she could do something about it, again. She took a deep breath in, and out. "Deadpan, if you truly want to be an artist, you have to be able to withstand all forms of critique." She let out a sigh. "Even destructive critique." She sighed with a disappointed groan following it, she slumped onto the table at the realization that what she said was destructive critique. "I won't speak anymore about your jokes, it's clearly not helping anypony." She was currently in a state rarely seen by the public, she felt really bad for ruining Deadpans jokes, twice, but she saw them as bad, and he took that as way more than it was. She let out a sigh, sitting upright looking down at the counter, waiting for her food to arrive, patiently.

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal looked worried. "Come on." She looked at the counter. "Again?" She mumbled quietly to herself, it was almost too much, but, she was still there; she could do something about it, again. She took a deep breath in, and out. "Deadpan, if you truly want to be an artist, you have to be able to withstand all forms of critique." She let out a sigh. "Even destructive critique." She sighed with a disappointed groan following it, she slumped onto the table at the realization that what she said was destructive critique. "I won't speak anymore about your jokes, it's clearly not helping anypony." She was currently in a state rarely seen by the public, she felt really bad for ruining Deadpans jokes, twice, but she saw them as bad, and he took that as way more than it was. She let out a sigh, sitting upright looking down at the counter, waiting for her food to arrive, patiently.

 

"Oh no, I can handle critique. " Deadpan mumbled. "Just sayin' something's bad or facehoofing at it is ​not ​critique." he frowned and had a somewhat angry look on his face as Zen handed her the Hayburger.

 

"Crystal, are you alright?" Zen asked,, clearly worried. She then looked over and saw the look on Deadpan's face. "Oh dear..."

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39, She looked at Zen, shaking her head a few times, as a no. "I'm not..." She looked at the hay burger, taking a bite out of the- "Mmm..." She smiled as she chewed, looked to Zen as she chewed her food up, swallowing with a gulp. "So, the food's great." She said, giving a complementing nod towards Zen. She knew as a change of topic, it wouldn't work, so she quickly set herself on track; "Um, Deadpan, I won't uh... Facehoof at your jokes either then." She spoke nervously, she looked at Zen. "To answer your question..." She paused to make sure Deadpan was listening. "I don't like hurting ponies feelings, but I hurt his." She said pointing to Deadpan. "So I feel bad about it."

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39, She looked at Zen, shaking her head a few times, as a no. "I'm not..." She looked at the hay burger, taking a bite out of the- "Mmm..." She smiled as she chewed, looked to Zen as she chewed her food up, swallowing with a gulp. "So, the food's great." She said, giving a complementing nod towards Zen. She knew as a change of topic, it wouldn't work, so she quickly set herself on track; "Um, Deadpan, I won't uh... Facehoof at your jokes either then." She spoke nervously, she looked at Zen. "To answer your question..." She paused to make sure Deadpan was listening. "I don't like hurting ponies feelings, but I hurt his." She said pointing to Deadpan. "So I feel bad about it."

"My food isn't THAT great..." Zen gave a small smile, "And oh my...You really facehoofed at one of his jokes? Well then, I hope you weren't warming up to him. He really, REALLY does not like it when ponies do that." she sighed as she explained.

 

"Psh, it's whatever." Deadpan rolled his eyes, sounding slightly angrier than his usual jovial tone.

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal looked at Deadpan, with worrisome eyes. "Yeah, I was warming up to him. But I don't like lying, so..." She gave a pause there. "I wanted to tell the truth about your joke, but, you took it harshly." She took a bite out of what was left of the hayburger, making sure it was eaten before she spoke. "Although you had a right to do so, I was being blunt. For a rather simple joke." She looked at her empty hooves. She had extra money, still, she did have a lot of bits, so she could buy some more food. "And I only used your joke earlier to cheer you up." She let out a sigh. "But it didn't work." She looked up at Deadpan. "Anyways... At the mention of it, I would like to try that pie."

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal looked at Deadpan, with worrisome eyes. "Yeah, I was warming up to him. But I don't like lying, so..." She gave a pause there. "I wanted to tell the truth about your joke, but, you took it harshly." She took a bite out of what was left of the hayburger, making sure it was eaten before she spoke. "Although you had a right to do so, I was being blunt. For a rather simple joke." She looked at her empty hooves. She had extra money, still, she did have a lot of bits, so she could buy some more food. "And I only used your joke earlier to cheer you up." She let out a sigh. "But it didn't work." She looked up at Deadpan. "Anyways... At the mention of it, I would like to try that pie."

 

"Comin' right up." Deadpan rolled his eyes and walked off into the kitchen, then walked back to Crystal and handed her a pie. "Enjoy your food." he said, rather angrily, actually.

 

"Deadpan, not everyone is accustomed to your style of humor-"

 

"Oh cram it ya Liu Kang  rip-off."

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal gasped quietly at Deadpan's reaction to that. "Wow." She levitated the fork down, scooping the pie up. "Just, wow." She ate the pie she had scooped up. "First time I've heard that." She chewed her food, realizing she was close to being full, for a first. She would have to just, talk, before leaving. She didn't want to leave on a bad note. "I think you need to just except I don't like the joke and move on." She said, taking her fork, scooping more pie up, eating it. "Since I can't explain why I don't like it, to make it not sound as harsh."  Another bite of the pie was taking by Crystal. "Also, the pie tastes rather good." She pointed the fork at Deadpan. "So you have that going for you."

Edited December 24, 2016 by Lloyd

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39, Crystal gasped quietly at Deadpan's reaction to that. "Wow." She levitated the fork down, scooping the pie up. "Just, wow." She ate the pie she had scooped up. "First time I've heard that." She chewed her food, realizing she was close to being full, for a first. She would have to just, talk, before leaving. She didn't want to leave on a bad note. "I think you need to just except I don't like the joke and move on." She said, taking her fork, scooping more pie up, eating it. "Since I can't explain why I don't like it, to make it not sound as harsh."  Another bite of the pie was taking by Crystal. "Also, the pie tastes rather good." She pointed the fork at Deadpan. "So you have that going for you."

 

"Gee, thanks. Totally makes me feel better that what I picked up as a casual hobby is better than what I got my cutie mark in." Deadpan rolled his eyes. "Like Zen said, I don't really like it when people just bash my jokes without givin' any constructive criticism."

 

"Deadpan, I understand that, but please calm down-"

 

"I said shut up, Zen. With all the psychic crap goin' on in your head I thought you'd pick up on that."

[BrineBlade 28]

​Finally,​ Salt thought as he stepped in, ​Now to see how good their food is, especially for being a more unknown place.​ Salt went up to the counter. ​That pony talking with the staff, she seems familiar...can't remember from where though.

 

​​Salt then realized he was standing there looking at the other customer for way too long, "I'd like a hayburger, please," he said blushing, hoping the other customer wouldn't be creeped out.

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

​Finally,​ Salt thought as he stepped in, ​Now to see how good their food is, especially for being a more unknown place.​ Salt went up to the counter. ​That pony talking with the staff, she seems familiar...can't remember from where though.

 

​​Salt then realized he was standing there looking at the other customer for way too long, "I'd like a hayburger, please," he said blushing, hoping the other customer wouldn't be creeped out.

 

"Hayburger, on it." Deadpan said, walking into the kitchen then walking back out with a hayburger after a few minutes, his eyes suddenly gaining more life than they had talking to Crystal, it seemed. "Here ya go, buddy, no need to eat like a cow​. Eh? Get it? Ah, this is a vegan country they don't get jokes like that."

[BrineBlade 28]

"Hayburger, on it." Deadpan said, walking into the kitchen then walking back out with a hayburger after a few minutes, his eyes suddenly gaining more life than they had talking to Crystal, it seemed. "Here ya go, buddy, no need to eat like a cow​. Eh? Get it? Ah, this is a vegan country they don't get jokes like that."

Salt chuckled before taking a bite of the hay burger. His eyes widened, amazed at the taste, the texture, and even the way it was prepared. After he swallowed, Salt said to the guy, "How come I've never heard of this place? This is the greatest hay burger I've ever had."

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39, @@BrineBlade,

 

Crystal let out a groan, not at Deadpan's joke, but when the pony laughed at it, rubbing her face with a hoof, dragging it down her muzzle in a drawn out facehoof. "Great, I'm the only one here who doesn't like your jokes." She said with a very disappointed tone. "Not to dismiss the fact that was kind of funny." She said, with a giggle, not a lie though, she did find it funny. She poked her pie, her ear turning at the other customer as he spoke. "The hay burgers are good here." She put a piece of the pie in her mouth, chewing it thoroughly, making sure she had none in her mouth when she continued speaking. "And the pie too, most of their food is good actually."

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

Salt chuckled before taking a bite of the hay burger. His eyes widened, amazed at the taste, the texture, and even the way it was prepared. After he swallowed, Salt said to the guy, "How come I've never heard of this place? This is the greatest hay burger I've ever had."

 

 

@@asdfmovienerd39, @@BrineBlade,

 

Crystal let out a groan, not at Deadpan's joke, but when the pony laughed at it, rubbing her face with a hoof, dragging it down her muzzle in a drawn out facehoof. "Great, I'm the only one here who doesn't like your jokes." She said with a very disappointed tone. "Not to dismiss the fact that was kind of funny." She said, with a giggle, not a lie though, she did find it funny. She poked her pie, her ear turning at the other customer as he spoke. "The hay burgers are good here." She put a piece of the pie in her mouth, chewing it thoroughly, making sure she had none in her mouth when she continued speaking. "And the pie too, most of their food is good actually."

 

"Eheheheheh, stop. You guys are makin' me blush.." Deadpan mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

 

"Well I'm glad you two like the food. And that Ms. Crystal repaired her friendship with Deadpan." Zen smiled happily. "And to answer your question, Mr..." Zen paused, as if thinking, "...Salt, the reason nobody goes here is because lack of proper advertising."

[BrineBlade 28]

@@asdfmovienerd39, @@BrineBlade,

 

Crystal let out a groan, not at Deadpan's joke, but when the pony laughed at it, rubbing her face with a hoof, dragging it down her muzzle in a drawn out facehoof. "Great, I'm the only one here who doesn't like your jokes." She said with a very disappointed tone. "Not to dismiss the fact that was kind of funny." She said, with a giggle, not a lie though, she did find it funny. She poked her pie, her ear turning at the other customer as he spoke. "The hay burgers are good here." She put a piece of the pie in her mouth, chewing it thoroughly, making sure she had none in her mouth when she continued speaking. "And the pie too, most of their food is good actually."

 

"Eheheheheh, stop. You guys are makin' me blush.." Deadpan mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly.

 

"Well I'm glad you two like the food. And that Ms. Crystal repaired her friendship with Deadpan." Zen smiled happily. "And to answer your question, Mr..." Zen paused, as if thinking, "...Salt, the reason nobody goes here is because lack of proper advertising."

 

Salt was surprised, ​I know I've sent some work to Canterlot and Manehattan, but I can't be that famous, could I?​ "Well, I could make some flashy advertising if you want," Salt said to the two before he curiously asked Zen, "Also, how do you know me? Did you order a decorative piece from me, or was it just word of mouth?"

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39,

 

Crystal's ears perked up, she smiled lightly. Now in a mood that was more often seen in public. A mood that made her feel like writing right now. Perhaps a short story that took place here. She finished up her pie, with another scoop of it with her fork. She pushed the plate forward, standing up. "Well, like I said. I prefer leaving a conversation on a good note." She opened her satchel, one that probably wasn't noticed until now. She put some bits on the counter, then realizing an important question. "Oh!" She took out her bit bag. "What's the bill for the food?" She asked levitating the bit bag, ready to remove the bits needed to pay.

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

Salt was surprised, ​I know I've sent some work to Canterlot and Manehattan, but I can't be that famous, could I?​ "Well, I could make some flashy advertising if you want," Salt said to the two before he curiously asked Zen, "Also, how do you know me? Did you order a decorative piece from me, or was it just word of mouth?"

 

@@asdfmovienerd39,

 

Crystal's ears perked up, she smiled lightly. Now in a mood that was more often seen in public. A mood that made her feel like writing right now. Perhaps a short story that took place here. She finished up her pie, with another scoop of it with her fork. She pushed the plate forward, standing up. "Well, like I said. I prefer leaving a conversation on a good note." She opened her satchel, one that probably wasn't noticed until now. She put some bits on the counter, then realizing an important question. "Oh!" She took out her bit bag. "What's the bill for the food?" She asked levitating the bit bag, ready to remove the bits needed to pay.

 

"42 bits, please!" Deadpan answered with a smile, "Be sure to tell your friends about this place! We ​really ​need it!"

 

Zn blinked then slapped her face with a hoof, "My apologies, I often use my telepathy without thinking. It's lead to trouble before." she explained, then perked up and smiled. "And yes, we'd love to have you work on advertisement's for us."

[FanOfManyShows 398]

@@asdfmovienerd39,

 

Crystal smiled. "I'll be sure to tell my friends, and fans." She levitated 42 bits, placing them on the counter. "Might even mention it in my next book."  She said with a smile, walking to the door, briefly turning around. "And I didn't mind the jokes, they were funny." She turned around, leaving through the door.

[asdfmovienerd39 55]

@@asdfmovienerd39,

 

Crystal smiled. "I'll be sure to tell my friends, and fans." She levitated 42 bits, placing them on the counter. "Might even mention it in my next book."  She said with a smile, walking to the door, briefly turning around. "And I didn't mind the jokes, they were funny." She turned around, leaving through the door.

 

"Thank youz2" Deadpan grinned, "Be sure to come to my next show! I do small gigs now!"

 

"Thank you for the publicity! We really do owe you, Ms. Crystal! We owe you an incredible amount, actually!" Zen waved. "You're welcome to come back any time, always remember that!"

[Tech Reel 444]

@asdfmovienerd39

Tech was strolling through Ponyville as he often does. As usual he found himself bored out of his mind with nothing to do. Suddenly he heard a rumbling noise, and felt it too. "Ugh..when was the last time I ate?" He looked around for somewhere to eat, spotting a little Cafe. Tech walked up to the window, looking in at seemingly satisfied customers. "This'll do," He says as he walks through the door and up to the counter. "Hi." He looked up at the menu, pondering what he was hungry for. "Could I get a hay burger and a side of hay fries? Also do you have any drinks other than coffee and beer? Soda maybe?"

Edited January 18, 2017 by Tech Reel