Criticize my new OC - Felix North

[Driz 1,552]

Meet Felix North, my latest - and, by far, better developed - character. 

 

 

That was the first time I took the big risk of creating myself the design for an Original Character, since I'm a completely amateur artist and I've been only using the Pony Creator until now. Even though it's still nothing very unique and dandy, I was incredibly satisfied with the final results. But as always, I wanna hear your opinion too. :B

 

I was in doubt whether to post this here or in another suitable section like Fan Arts, but since I want critics more focused on his background story and personality than on the drawing itself, Creative Resources seemed like a better place for it~

 

You can find his character page linked above, here, or in my signature below.

 

Credit for all the ideas about his birth place, Trotelvania, goes entirely to @@Enigma. I also kinda ripped-off her OCs design... I apologize for that.

Edited December 22, 2012 by DrizzleSTAR

[Leafeon 2,702]

His tail and mane look a bit off. Maybe the tail should be a bit wider at the end. Or the mane a bit longer. But I think overall he looks quite nice. :3

 

That backstory is awesome (I wish I could write).

[Silverwisp the Bard 2,353]

The design is nice, can't say the same for the backstory:

The Everfree forest isn't big enough to hold a city, especially not one big enough to contain slums

-The Sisters wouldn't tolerate this king

-His personality seems just unnecessary angsty, if he gets worked up about everything, he won't make a good doctor

 

If you want my advise, make him a bit more like Fluttershy: A bit timid, but confident as soon as his help is required. Also, you're misusing the word "perverted".

[Driz 1,552]

His tail and mane look a bit off. Maybe the tail should be a bit wider at the end. Or the mane a bit longer. But I think overall he looks quite nice. :3

 

That backstory is awesome (I wish I could write).

 

Yeah, I had a few troubles when making his mane and tail... I hadn't really an established design on my mind and I just drew something kinda out of nowhere... It still needs a little touch.

 

Thanks a bunch anyway. :3

 

The design is nice, can't say the same for the backstory:

The Everfree forest isn't big enough to hold a city, especially not one big enough to contain slums

-The Sisters wouldn't tolerate this king

-His personality seems just unnecessary angsty, if he gets worked up about everything, he won't make a good doctor

 

If you want my advise, make him a bit more like Fluttershy: A bit timid, but confident as soon as his help is required. Also, you're misusing the word "perverted".

 

I thought about that... When looking at Equestria Map, the Everfree Forest doesn't even go out of Equestria. I tried to make the city sound as mysterious as I could, so not much logic was required.

 

At some point I was even thinking of some kind of portal inside the forest that warped ponies to Trotelvania, like another dimension or something like that... But it still needs a bunch of work, I agree. I don't usually write much complex stuff as this one - this was a first to me.

 

As for his personality... ugh~ I had all the ideas on my mind, but I failed when writing it down... This happens often.

 

Again because that was a first to me, everything might look a little controversial and I couldn't find the words I wanted to describe some of his characteristics, like this "heat" he feels when next to cute mares and all... The language barrier is always a problem for me.

 

I have to review everything and clean it all up progressively... Thanks a lot for the critics~ :3