OC Feedback - The 4 Corners

[Colt 555]

So, after much work and time working with many amazing artists from the community I have finally finished the working designs of the Four Corners. A group of ponies are keystones to my Fan Fictions. I would love some feedback from the expert brony audience here in the MLP forums in all regard to them, from art and visual design to personalities and stories, much of what i post here is synthesised hope this not to be a bother.

 

 

 

 

Their world 

 

At some point between the banishment of nightmare moon and its return there was a dark time for Equestria and the rule of Princess Celestia. The times of peace slowly come with harsh efforts, conflicts and sacrifices. The princess couldn’t accomplish this alone, to bring peace to her realm and subjects he got the aid of 4 poweful and noble ponies. They came from around different origins and places but together they became the Guardians of the Realm guarding peace and life over the land realm defending it against threats from outside and inside. Each one of them was commanded to protect each area of Equestria and because of that they were named by the ponies  of that time The Four Corners.

 

I will be updating this thread with each one of them and to star here is the guardian of the south.

 

 

All about Faith Bastion life could be summarized in two words: Devotion and Strength. As far as he can recall he was given a fiscal strength far beyond a normal earth pony he was recruited for the Royal Guard as a very young foal and indoctrinated in the ways of the military. He developed such passion and devotion towards the Princess of the Sun that he knows she was the one who gave him such strength and might (even she denied it every time he asked). Bastion was the first earth pony since the sister princesses took the throne to be a personal guard to them, he became a well known hero of the battles he took from the hoofs of defeat.

 

Over all of his feats in battle and heroic figure among the ranks Faith Bastion was always known for his kind heart and compassion shared among friends and enemies alike. He always followed the teachings of Celestia and believed that all creatures on the world deserved a place to live a happy life. He always took prisoners in battle and treat them with dignity never executed a single defeated soul and stood among the most honorable ponies in the battle field. As a earth pony he enjoyed the wild life and he was responsible for growing the flower garden that separated the towers of Canterlot’s castle.

 

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Armored Four Corners art by Wicklesmack Faith Bastion Art and original art design by to-nio

Edited May 15, 2013 by Colt

[ActFast231 432]

Good lord that is some Grade A art and fanfic. It feels like a mix between LOTR and Mortal Kombat, if that does it any justice. Well Done

[Colt 555]

Good lord that is some Grade A art and fanfic. It feels like a mix between LOTR and Mortal Kombat, if that does it any justice. Well Done

 

Thanks a lot for your thoughts, yes there are a lot of influence from several sources on this character and the fic's behind them I just hope they reach the a good reception by the public.

 

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Now to continue with the OC's here is the second one the guardian of the West.

 

 

Once a wild raised filly Freedom Gale spent his early years among the savage creatures of the forests at Equestria west coast. Living a free care living was all in the filly mind until the chaos of those dark times in the shape of a battle caused a fire that burnt her home and friends. Since then she fought against the Equestrian forces keeping them away from the fertile lands and calming for the freedom of their lurkers.

 

She was taken down by the other 3 corners witch considered her a formidable opponent after facing Gale's weather control, they showed her that it was in the realms best interest to protect the life on every being and that the fire that turn her against Celestia was not an action from the alicorn rule but from her enemies. Since then she was  trained and raised by the Corners and the Princess of the sun until 10 years after her training began she was named the West corner last and youngest of them all.

 

Gale is not very kind or polite around others she is intimidated by new ponies coming near her and can be considered rude around them. Still she will always keep under her wing those who have been “accepted” by her heart and will take care of them with strong passion

 

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Freedom Glae Art by to-nio

Edited May 2, 2013 by Colt

[Righteous Fury 344]

Several spelling/grammar errors, make sure to get a good editor when you start writing the story proper.

 

Otherwise not bad, looks like you have some nice diversity in the characters, just make sure you know their flaws as well as their strengths.

[Colt 555]

 

 

Several spelling/grammar errors, make sure to get a good editor when you start writing the story proper. Otherwise not bad, looks like you have some nice diversity in the characters, just make sure you know their flaws as well as their strengths.

 

 

Yup Im working with a pair of great editors on the text to be published on FIM.FIC and dArt. sadly English is not my main language but im working on improving thanks a lot for the feedback on that it helps me to know where I still lack experience.

 

On the weaknesses part in a way well they dont have any other than those brought by the same trait they represent, I need them to be in a way the "perfect" figure of heroes this because there is a purpose for this 4 to be epic. Hopefuly, if i dont die or something the fic would show that in the future.

 

After that here is the guardian of the North

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Said to be one of the few descendants of the Chrystal Ponies line of the throne Hoarfrost Truth was born among the cold tundra near the peaks at the north end of Equestria. He was blessed with magnificent magical potential however the terrible sunlight reflected by the snow burn his sight since a foal making him developed such potential using his magic as his eyes.

 

Trained and proved by the equestrian military and the conflicts of the dark days of the realm he climbed over the ranks of the royal guard until he gain the title of guardian of the realm from Celestia herself naming him the north corner. 

 

He is a pony of few but significant words, said to always speak truth and unable to pronounce lies. As a young foal he grew alone and survived as could on one of the most terrible environments in the realm, for years he hated Celestia for not bringing her warm light to the land in the north but as he became his personal guard he realized how much the Alicorn was for him the realm and the world. Because of his lonely foal hood some ponies think he has a cold attitude towards those around him but the truth is he holds them dear in his heart. 

 

 

[Righteous Fury 344]

Something that occurred to me: I think the cutie marks are too complex. They're usually very simple designs, recognizable from a distance. These characters have a lot of detail in their marks, which isn't necessarily bad, but it really makes them stand out from the show's characters.

[Colt 555]

Sorry for the lack of updates lots lots lots of work to do and few time for fun stuff  

 

 

 

Something that occurred to me: I think the cutie marks are too

complex. They're usually very simple designs, recognizable from a distance.

 

 

As always thanks for your thoughts. Yes as you say their CM's are very different in both concept and execution from the ones in the show, but there is a reason for this. This characters are from one thousand years before the show. In my way of understanding people, and talking pastel ponies from magical worlds, ideas and concepts were vague and not so specific in the past as they are today. So I got the idea of conceptual cutie marks that went with each of the traits of each pony, not a specific talent but more of their meaning in the story and the history of Equestria. 

 

Well now its time, the last of the corners their leader and guardian of the east.

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Born into the royal family with the divine blood of alicorn in her veins Princess Ancora was one of the few reasons that kept Celestia smiling after the banishment of Nightmare Moon. She found in her niece a fortress of hope and reason to escape from all the terrible events the dark times brought to her realm. In exchange Celestia was like a mother for Ancora, always a caring teacher and a faithful friend that brought to her the joy and wonders of being an alicorn.

 

From Celestia Ancora learned the responsibility that her powers brought and becoming a symbol of hope and strength among all the ponies in Equestria. After witnessing how much pain and suffering the dark times brought to her “mother’s” heart Ancora decided to oppose evil face to face. Trained for 17 years by the best warriors, magicians, and strategists of Equestria she was a force to be recon with and the first of the Four Corners to be named to later become the leader of them and a banner of hope to the realm and its ponies.

Edited May 15, 2013 by Colt

[Righteous Fury 344]

 

 

As always thanks for your thoughts. Yes as you say their CM's are very different in both concept and execution from the ones in the show, but there is a reason for this. This characters are from one thousand years before the show. In my way of understanding people, and talking pastel ponies from magical worlds, ideas and concepts were vague and not so specific in the past as they are today. So I got the idea of conceptual cutie marks that went with each of the traits of each pony, not a specific talent but more of their meaning in the story and the history of Equestria.

 

 

OK, as long as you have good in-universe justification for it. Anyways, great designs, interesting premise, this should be a good fic.

[Colt 555]

So there they are The Four Corners Defenders of the Realm, the last hope the ponies of the past had to bring Equestria to the utopia it is today. Their tales were famous among ponies for 500 years their legacy is a key stone to the now harmonious times in the realm, the way they vanished is still a mystery but their legend is still alive.

 

 

 

sorry for the drama on this last post but i want to build some expectations =P