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Eniac

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Blog Entries posted by Eniac

  1. Eniac

    Lockdown blues?

    By Eniac,

    It's only been a week out of the usual school system and not going outside and socialising but it is having an impact. I feel very purposeless in general, though there are many points throughout the day were I feel great. It's the inbetween times.
    So I have schoolwork, chores, projects and playing & talking with family. When doing any those 4 things I feel happy, it's the inbetween time. The issue is that though I will feel happy during the period there is still a lot of uncertainty as to what I should be doing currently. The issue is the change in setting when doing schoolwork, I am not as focused. My schoolwork takes longer than it normally would because I keep jumping between activities and it talks awhile to get in the mood given the setting of doing it in my house. This means that I feel more drained and thus chores feel more arduous and the reduction in time from ineffecient multitasking makes me feel awful that I am not spending time with my family.
    Hopefully, I will slowly get used to the new setting, the improvement to avoiding distractions and returning to a school like structure should help this. But a major issue is the weight of this lockdown. I don't generally go out and meet a load of friends, but I usually do activities over the weekends, go meet relatives during the week and meet friends at school. But now that face to face is gone I guess that's putting me down.
    Anyway not feeling terrible the whole time, it just comes back in the quite moments.
  2. Eniac

    Day 27: Redesign

    By Eniac,

    So to increase the speed of control I moved from VNC to ssh and this meant I had to add a text based control system. Basically a way to select a motor and then increment or decrement the angle of the motor at varying speeds. Nothin special but still took a far amount of time.
    Not much to really show here except possibly the fact that I moved the legs around so that they stuck outwards not inwards but I will demonstrate that once I have some preprogrammed movement for the robot which should be in a few days?
  3. Eniac

    What do I want?

    By Eniac,

    I constantly nit pick myself but I never really get any solutions. Why? Becuase I don't really know who I want to be and that's is exactly how it should be. Unfortunately this post is long but it's not really for you it's mainly for me.
    So the majority of blogs I have posted in here have revolved around my short comings and how to improve on them or such and such. Rereading them after taking a long break I see that they very wishy washy and mainly just about how I am bad and should get good. I have never really sat down and said this is what I want to achieve specifically and by this point in time. I think the only real thing that has kept nagging me since as long as I can remember is this fascination with being the absolute best, and is the main reason for my nit picking.
    I forget that I have this little demon in my head and it means I can go down some pretty dark rabbit holes. Of course it is very clear I can't be the best for two reasons: 1. Being the best is vague and can always be reimagined as a new out of reach goal 2. It is rediculous to be the number one best in anything as a lot of factors have a part. Obviously someone always is but it's not something everyone can aspire to and expect it to be the case. You can always be your best and that's what I need to focus.
    So why haven't I posted in a while? Well it's this very reason, I don't feel I need to publically say I am bad. I am currently feeling content with myself, I know a lot of my shortcomings and my strengths. So there is nothing prompting me to go out and say look at this. But I don't want this blog to be about that so I am making this post to try and steer myself toward that course. I want this to be an interesting thought I had or a little project I am doing. Not here's why you should pitty me or oh look how smart I am (During these periods of nit picking I sort of feel that I am doing it for other peoples pitty or for them to big me up).
    I'd like to get back to the title; A lot of what I consider myself now is based of off an event that happened 2 years ago (of course most of me is through experiences over the past 18 years but this is more of how I came to realise myself). I had the opportunity to receive a book from school so I got a self help book. This was when I thought I should be doing a million more things than I was and being a million times better at them. So my goal was simple, remove all this gunk and become and ultimate productivity machine. Clearly it didn't work, I couldn't get rid of this lazy thing in my head becuase it is essential; you can't fight it you have to deal with it. So I gave up and kept on my destructive ways.
    A year later I returned to it and started to follow the advice, I started journalling, realising when I was in the other mindset, setting out how I wanted to live and trying to follow all these rules at once. The journalling has started and has been instrumental to me. Then 5 months ago something clicked when I was talking to my mom. I finally opened up about how I felt about myself, my achievements and my worth which led me to realise how wrong I was. From this point I have started to realise a lot more about myself: why I fear death, my personality, my motives and even my sexualty. But I easily forget.
    But over these last few days, though really today, I realised why I keep forgetting: I am not completely true to myself. I am afraid to be me (this is in terms of myself, not outwardly. Outwardly I am generally true to how I feel or think inside its the feeling and thinking that's the issue). Everytime I open that self help book I am trying to be someone else, everytime I journal or take a personality test. I never want to know who I really am, cut of the shackles of what I have been told to be, mainly becuase I am afraid I am not who I thought I was. But, over the last few days I have started to think about it. I have no more school for 27 weeks and no more commitments so now I can try and learn about who I am.
    So what do I want? I want to stop putting up a facade and actually find out why I have certain strengths and weaknesses, who I am want to be and why, who I am, but really to not get bogged down and get on with just doing things no matter how crazy or seemingly strupid.
  4. Eniac

    Day 26!: Getting there?

    By Eniac,

    Took awhile for the glue gun to arrive but it did arrive a week ago. So why the 10 day wait?!? Well it hasn't really gone very smoothly.
    Three things:
    The structure of the robot is not fantastic - the legs should be ever so slightly longer and I should have gone with the harder but better first design The motor connections are the best so I spent a lot of time trying different methods, in the end I had to glue them so I can't reuse them It's been quite the uncertain week so haven't been able to really focus so actually most of the troubleshooting and solutions have happened in the last 2 days The plan now is to work on the structure, basically extendinding the legs. I have an idea, but given that I wasn't planning on this occuring it won't be perfect. After this I should be able to close up the whole robot and have it self contained. Finally get the robot moving and I will be happy that I have completed the robot, definitely do a little piece on issues and how I would have attempted it if I tried again.

    A major pet peeve in this project is the remote access to the device. Currently using a VNC but it's very slow, might just move to SSH using a text based UI instead. It will mean that the original tests will be a bit clunky but hopefully I will be able to program some predefined motions to get the experience more fluid. I will comment on this new method tomorrow.
     
  5. Eniac
    So I have completed quite a bit of work on the robot over the last week, I would've submitted an earlier update if it weren't for the fact that I have felt terrible over the last 2-3 days. However, I have been  doing robotics work throughout the week, though I didn't yesterday (didn't really do anything yesterday, mainly slept). Anyway, two things have happened: First I have completed the pieces they just need to be attached to motors and we're ready to move some robot, Second I have completed the live video stream (took most of today becuase I am not good at trouble shooting sockets and haven't done anything with them outside of sandboxed environments) But it works!
    Action plan now is to wait for my glue gun to arrive and then I can start assembling the robot. Then it's a question of calibration and controls (hoping to use some sort of RC to control it). The final step would actually be to set it up as a internet server  so that I can control it from anywhere! I have never really looked into servers, though I know their basic operation from my computing course. The main issue I foresee is the latency of video as it is already pretty strained
    I will get a video up eventually, but I am still working on it's efficiency as trying to screen record and stream seems to drop the frame rate down to powerpoint.
     
     

  6. Eniac

    Day 13: Pieces cut out

    By Eniac,

    So all the pieces of the robot have been cut out. All that remains is for me to drill the holes to connect the pieces to the motors, as well as drill the hole at the top of the chasis to allow the control board to stick out. This sticking out bit is so that connecting the motors to the board is easier. So far so good. Recently I have been doing more work on the project keeping in check with the original lent project idea. The measurements have been fairly accurate though not perfect, but hey it's a personal project with the pieces hand cut so it's never going to be perfect

  8. Eniac
    Nothing much to say. I have outlined and drawn the pieces that I need to cut out and put together to make the robot physical. The only missing pieces are the connecting pieces which will just be small blocks of wood rather than sheets of wood. The robot is looking to be quite squat but hopefully it should still walk, if not I will just have to recreate the legs.


  9. Eniac

    Day 6: Revision

    By Eniac,

    Well not necessarily regrets, but I am feeling like I am just posting things in here to say I have done something for the day. These are occuring later in the night so it's just chewing into sleeping time. Tomorrow and Wednesday I am unsure whether I'll even get a sketch in. But in light of how my time has been split I have a revision to how I will go about these challenges. I will aim to get a sketch out everyday, like today's it can be a quick 5-10 minute sketch if anything this is helping me with quickly getting a pose done. But for this project I will be doing as much as I can when I can. I am thinking of also placing a ban on Media (Netflix, Youtube, Snapchat etc.) and instead use that time for the project. But I don't want to be posting in here for the sake of posting any longer. Next post will either be all the pieces drawn or them cut out. No daily updates as nothing is getting done that rapidly.
  10. Eniac
    So yesterday I did not manage to complete any work on the robot project in terms of physical. I would like to claim that I had some concepts of it worked out in my head but that's a stretch. I have been done for the weekend with my grandparents so have been doing activities outside of these minor projects. But I have 30 minutes at the end of the day to try and squeeze in at least one of my projects. In yesterdays case I quickly whipped up a sketch, but today I have taken measurements and will get a few ideas down for how the parts will be formed out of wood.

  11. Eniac

    Day 2: Sketches

    By Eniac,

    So yea, got a bit carried away with my lent side project. Much harder to deal with outlines, sketches and blocked colour in Paint 3D without any layers! Anyway that's beyond the point. I still did manage to get something done on the project...ish.
    It's more of a cop out but I got down the basic idea of what the parts will look like, how they will function and the measurements I need to take. will take these measurements tomorrow as the task for that day and then start thinking about dimensions of the pieces. After this I can get some more realistic sketches with the aim to transfering them onto wood to cut out.
    But today was focused, it seems, on the sketches. Also didn't have as much time as yesterday due to 2 exams occuring rather than just 1.

  12. Eniac

    Day 1: Setup

    By Eniac,

    So nothing really exciting today. I just set up the eight motors to my Raspberry Pi, then remotely connected to that through VNC. I also added a quick few lines of code so that I could controll each of the motors individual.
    To keep the project rolling from ground up I have already implemented seperate motor classes so that the code is more manageable. The next step really is to get some measurements and actually start getting some legs and a chasis to move around with and manipulate. Not much else I can do with just motors on their own.
    edit: added this video
     
    MOV_0007.mp4
  13. Eniac

    My Lent Plan

    By Eniac,

    So I am not avidly religious, but I still follow vague Christian festivals and beliefs (to a certain extent). Anyway one of the 'festivals' that I look forward to is the one of Lent. This time allows me to develop new habits or get rid of bad habits and has done me in good stead so far: cutting down sugar, reducing Youtube time, getting me to journal and a handful of others. I would prefer for the challenge to do or make something as this gives me either a new skill (in the very least new knowledge) and something I can show or tell people about afterwards.
    So in light of that, this year I am going to use this commitment program to actually get some good work done on my robotics project I have been meaning to get into for the last 3 months. I will be creating a seperate blog for its progress as there will be a load of entries and I don't want to clog this one. I will still make entries here during this period.
    The only problem with this plan is that though it is cool and exciting it is already something I have done before. Given that I want to go into robotics and programming I have made a handful already. So I was thinking of maybe adding something on top, something that is not so goal oriented which I can do in spare time rather than watching Youtube or Netflix for hours on end with nothing at the end to demonstrate. I also realise that I haven't really done anything mlp related (except the base traced and amalgamated profile picture) at all on these forums, which I found quite desturbing.
    So as a bonus project I am going to try out sketching/cartooning, focusing on mlp and more specifically my OC. This is a skill I've wanted to develop but always had the excuse: 'I have no time', all I want to do is 10-15 minutes a day doing a quick sketch. Importantly, there is no goal, I can't 'fail' and it's a brand new skill so I will certainly mess up (probably for the whole period of 46 days). I will post the sketches in my status feed to liven it up a little bit and make it more pony orientated. However, this is a side quest so I may miss some days.
    Quick thing to note, though it is sometimes believed that Lent is 40 days it is in fact 46 days. The extra 6 days are the Sundays, in terms of Christainty Sunday is a day of rest so in theory you do not have to complete Lent during these days. However, to keep the ball rolling I am doing the full 46 with no breaks.
    Looking forward to the season and I hope I make something to interest you or inspire you to do something yourself.
    stay healthy.
  14. Eniac

    Complacency

    By Eniac,

    I'd like to add a quite entry here on complacency. I had a mathematics mock exam today and I assumed given that I do further and further pure mathematics I should be able to breeze through the exam without much prep. The issue was that it was not so easy, now the majority of the issues I faced were silly mistakes so not necessarily lack of knowledge but these slowed me down and put more time pressure on me. The mistakes occured becuase I wasn't putting as much effort into the questions as I deemed them easy.
    The major problem occured when I topic came up which, during learning it, I skipped the exercises as it felt very similar to previously done topics. I then didn't revise this for the same reason assuming that I could quickly reason it out. The fact I had added a bit of time pressure meant that no I could not reason it out. So though I have not done badly in the test overall, I did get cocky and meant that I lost multiple marks which I shouldn't have.
    Lesson learnt: Don't be complacent! Don't get cocky
    I agree we all make mistakes and can't get perfect scores. For the revision I did and the situation I performed the best I could trying out the topic question to the best of my ability. I am not sniding myself for not doing well I am sniding myself for being arrogant. This ultimately led to me underperforming, it's the classic tortoise and the hare and tbh in most aspects of my life I am the hare.
    There is also the fact that I may be reaching my limit in mathematics, there is stage for everyone where they reach their limit. If there were no limit everyone could put in the time and be excellent - which sometimes I falsely believe to be true but that's another issue. I'll see what the result is, tbh I am not so fussed about that as mocks are to see your holes and I can see a gaping one: my lack of respect for the difficulty in normal mathematics. I have a chance to redeem myself in normal mathematics on thursday, and in mathematics in general tomorrow. I have definitely spent some time today getting to know my weaknesses for tomorrow's exam.
    As a note: I don't necessarily have a solution to not being complacent. I feel at the moment my complacency ties in with my laziness, and in a way the two are interlinked, and for laziness I do not have a solution. Though I am starting to realise that laziness is essential if used correctly, so I don't need a 'solution'. But complacency is never good, I guess the idea would be to know your ability in a field or at least gauge it against those around you. Importantly don't get swept up into their view of ability, keep in mind the overall populous. It's very hard to guage your ability which is why, I believe, many incredible people don't realise how incredible they are (in the context of everyone else) and why very mediocre people think they are incredible.
    Anyway, stay healthy.
  15. Eniac

    Am I lazy?

    By Eniac,

    This was I question I would constantly answer yes to when I asked myself. No matter what I did during the day I would always answer 'yes'.
    Now for the old me
    This answer lead to many instances where I overworked myself, get overly stressed or feel utterly worthless. It's an issue that I have managed to resolve to a certain extent and I no longer beat myself up about not doing work I believed I should have completed. But I believe this is an issue a lot of people will have but in a different guise.
    The main issue behind this is the issue with time. The fact is that I don't mind watching multiple hours of Youtube or Netflix, spending days working on a project, hours reading a book, spend my evenings doing school work, focus solely on practiving my instruments, the list of activities is endless. The issue I realised is that I felt that I should be able to all of these activities to there full extent within the finite time I had alive. (In fact it was worse than just my lifetime, I felt I could be at a near expert level)
    The problem is that given the free time I have, or just in general the time I have, I could be excellent at any one skill that I enjoy pursuing. So clearly I should be able to excellent at all of these skills that I put some amount of time into. But of course this is not the case. So I was constantly comparing myself to a version of myself with infinite time, but it was always myself so I felt I had let myself down. That I had scuandered some amazing potential. So no matter how much anyone would praise me I would assume what I had done was baseline and that I could always do better.
    Into the new
    So over the last year and a half I have been improving myself, mainly mentally, but this issue of not being able to do as much as I feel I should still haunts me. But now rather than beat myself up I am starting to realise my limitations, my achievements and my potential.
    The reason this is the topic for this week is becuase I have basically spent the entire week almost constantly revising (rather memorising becuase I don't know how to revise). This has meant fairly full days of reading, reciting and revisiting topics and textbooks. But of course I can't to this constantly through out the day I have to breaks. Sometimes I just can't revise I am too mentally tired or saturated. But either way it brings back to the fore front of my mind the fact that I putting in a lot of time is that worth it?
    The main thing I realised was that I wasn't annoyed that I had watched Youtube instead of reading, or played an instrument instead of completing a project. It was rather that I hadn't done both, or all four. The issue was I didn't have the time! I just do not have the time.
    I can either try and keep doing a whole plethera of activities at a mediocre to decent standard or try and focus on a handful and make them excellent. I am sort off forced to become excellent at academics, or rather there are large systems in place to make that very easy so I have become very good at academics at the expense of some of my time.
    The Answer
    Yes, yes I am. But how? I have decided to always want to be great at everything I set my mind to, but I have set my mind to many things so I bounce between them. This means that in some context of an activity I am being lazy by not trying to complete that action. So if you were to follow me during a day I would be always trying to do something, I will be busy. But I won't be necessarily focused on an activity or project at hand.
    The Solution
    I see one solution: give up on something. (there is another later on)
    It's just that simple and is what I basically need to practice: letting go of an activity or anything I don't have the time to spend on. Personally that's very tough and is why I have been thinking about it a lot recently. Becuase of poor time management I have had to give up on all my projects for the week to focus on revision. But even then I still need to relax, unfortunately a lot of this has been through Youtube and the Internet so I have gotten carried away a few times. But also, importantly, there is only so much revision I can do in 2 weeks and I am close to the limit.
    It's a classic example of PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH becuase I have posted on this forum multiple times: find your limits, schedule in breaks, etc. Which I myself don't do very often. My time management is fairly solid but I don't know myself enough to really utilise it. I only recently discovered I can't do more than 7-8 hours of intense work thanks to the amount of revision I have been doing, that I need roughly 8 hours 45 minutes sleep, that I can work for 1 hour straight with 15 minute breaks and that I normally require 7 glasses of water a day. All of these are rough but by constantly keeping tabs on these activities I have found some of my limits.
    So that is the hidden second solution. Understand yourself, only you are able to trully know who you are. When you trully know yourself (I don't know if this is possible but it is what I am aiming for) then you can focus on what you want to do most and how to manage your time effectively becuase time is the only currency we can only spend, so spend it well.
    Stay healthy.
     
     
  16. Eniac

    Baby Yoda completed

    By Eniac,

    So after a bit over a week of intermittent crocheting I have completed my first complex plush: Baby Yoda. There is a lot of learnt whilst making the project which I will take to other projects.
    I very happy with how it turned out and am looking forward to completing more projects eventually creating my own patterns. But now I need to focus on my revision and mocks.

  17. Eniac

    Revision and memory

    By Eniac,

    If you have been looking at my todo list (which is really boring to be honest) you can see that since about Tuesday I have been mainly revising. I have mocks the start of next week (Monday 24th) - which aren't major but a good test of revision effectiveness. So I have started the arduous task of recollecting all the content I have learnt over the past year and half in the space of two weeks. This is now more of a test of memory and memory acquisition than knowledge of the subject and has got me thinking about the process of memory making and retrieving.
    The interesting aspect of memory I realised was that it was always there just not at the foreground of my thought. I am not constantly thinking about my childhood but if someone asked I have many nostalgic memories which I can recount, some not completely accurate. It's as if the memory are compressed and stored away in a deep place of the brain waiting for a keyword (keythought?) to trigger its retrieval.
    Beyond this, there are go to memories within a theme, for example in the childhood example I usually remember some amazing memories I got from growing up close to the wilderness in Zimbabwe. But after these first memories new ones hop on the back of these as small snippets remind you of other experiences. Eventually you can recount multiple situations and scenes from your childhood. In fact even reading that trigger word a lot can send you thinking down this path.
    So how can I remember all of these memories I never really meant to store? And why were they stored?
    I think the later is fairly easy to explain. Most of the time they are linked to a certain emotion or thought, one that at the time has big something that consumed me. However there are still memories that I have which seem to be a little less magnificent in emotion or thought. These I believe are repeated tasks that eventual ingrain themselves in your memory. You likely remember a lot of details about your school entrance or classrooms becuase you passed through them so often.
    So this is the key, memories are stored when enough, I guess, signals are sent down the same pathway down your brain. This is either through large emotional or thought provoking moments, or through constant use. So this is the key to creating lasting memories during revision.
    this part is pure speculation about how it is done, but the concept still works
    But there is also the idea of keythoughts bringing forth more information than would normally be stored at once. This is the way I try and revise or store information but for me it takes a while to get there. The simple idea is when you store memories you are going to understand that the situation you are in relates to a certain category (these may change over time but those memories move with that, also they can occupy multiple categories). This way the brain can store a lot of information which doesn't need to be saved in a way to be accessed easily, it doesn't need to use up 'thought space' memory rather 'deep' memory, these memories can be accessed through a small 'thought space' memory or phrase and bang more storage power.
    How to store a lot of information
    So how do I use this when revising? I break every subject into sub topics, to help with efficiency of revision any topics that are used frequently elsewhere won't need revising as they will already be engrained. Now I have a keythought, this being the subject title or the basic principle of that subject. Everytime I revise anypart of this subtopic I keep that keythought in mind, normally by stating it before reading that part aloud. This way I can focus on completely understanding a small part of the topic and also completely memorising it then storing it into 'deep' memory knowing I can access it using the keythought.
    The other part is to make sure that you trully understand the topic, make it trully click. This becomes a big memory as it falls into the thought method of storing information. If you finally understand a subtopic your brain is more likely to recall it as you will have strong emotions to back it: excitement, relief, enjoyment, wonder, etc. Preferably do this as you are learning the subject so that all you are doing now is cementing it fully in 'deep' memory with extra triggers. This is also why getting tests back is so important becuase the disappointed or anger of getting something wrong will help with remembering the correct answer, so always get the right answer if you get it wrong.
    Now the important thing to note is that for the nitty gritty of the course content it is not a big thought or emotion provoking experience, it is EXTREMELY dull. So utilise the repetition method. After revising a subtopic keep repeating it intermittently between other revision session. If you forget a bit go back and revise it again. But always remember to start with the key thought. Work from teh basics of the topic up, act as if you are teaching a child or at least someone a few education levels bellow yours: start with the knowns and assumptions and then get the answer. This way you can always fall back on the deeply ingrained basics (you've been hearing and using them FOR YEARS) to get to the information you need.
    Unfortunately this takes time, so I don't recommend going full revision constantly and understand that you will be tired out becuase you are pushing your brain (a big part of your body) to its maximum. Also stress is excellent in this case, it helps with memory acquisition. So if you feel stredded that you can't remember what you learnt at the beginning of the day remember you need that keythought, you may be tired, but also that you can use this stress to improve yourself.
    Conclusion
    Split the information into the smaller chunks possible Find a keythought that is easily recountable (preferably something external like the topic title) Have deep focus sessions to completely memorise sections using the keythought Try and make the information click to develop strong memories Start from basics and build up Keep the information topped up as frequently as possible Stress is your friend in this situation Remember to take it easy you are putting in a lot of effort Good luck anypony taking exams soon, revising for exams or generally in life. Stay healthy
  18. Eniac

    Baby Yoda without Robe

    By Eniac,

    I completed the ears a beginning of yesterday but I didn't have access to the plush at the time so decided to wait until today*. It now no longer looks like an alien and is starting to look like baby yoda. I think the ears could have been a little more rounded, the length I think is okay. Already started on the robe this morning so hopefully the full plush will be finished by the end of today.
     
    *The ears on their own look like triangles so there was no point in submitting an entry just off of that.

  19. Eniac

    Baby Yoda's body

    By Eniac,

    On the continuing project to avoid doing revision or work I have completed the body of the baby yoda plush. Only the the features that will actually demonstrate that it is baby yoda are left. These are the hardest parts though not long, just some complex stitching. Anyway, it is unlikely that I will make any progress tomorrow as I have a shift but hopefully I will make some progress over the weekend to have it finished by Monday

  20. Eniac

    Baby Yoda's First Arm

    By Eniac,

    So, whilst avoiding doing the tasks I have set out to do today I have completed another segment of Baby Yoda, the first arm. The doll is looking more humanoid, but there is still the ears and robe to do so at the moment he still looks like an alien.

  21. Eniac

    Start of Baby Yoda

    By Eniac,

    So I recently started crocheting. I have been meanig to for over a year with a basic plastic hook and yarn ready to go, but I never got around to it. After seeing multiple baby yoda crocheted dolls online I thought I would give it a try.
    To be clear this is not the first thing I have crocheted and this is not my own pattern (I am using this pattern). I may post some pictures of the first plushes which I made, two narwhals and a whale. Before even starting these I made 25 100 chain stitches to get used to tension and hook method. So leading up to this point I have done quite a bit of crochet.
    However, this is my first proper crochet plush, the whales were basically spheres with eyes, so I am having a great time 'building' (crocheting parts and stitching them together) him. At the moment he looks a bit like and alien but hopefully he will slowly start to resemble the real thing.
    PS. This is an example of a seperate blog thread using the tag: Yoda Project

  22. Eniac

    Dealing with Colds

    By Eniac,

    Quick introduction, this type of blog (Weekly) will hopefully be completed at the end of every week allowing me to discuss anything thoughts or events that have occured throughout the week. They will quite long and I don't expect anyone to read them in full but there will be a summary/conclusion at the end for anyone wanting just the answer.
    So over the last week I had and got over a cold, so nothing major. The interesting thing I thought about was the impact even a small cold can have on schedules and work effort. In fact I would say that a small cold is probably worse mentally in this respect than a more serious illness. However, regardless of the severity of the illness the issue still occurs, at least for me.
    The major issue is that if you have deadlines or projects which span weeks, or possible months, there is no way to accomodate unexpected illnesses (they are unexpected). This means that when an illness does strike you either power through the tasks you set until you reach a break point and try and rapidly recover. Of course, if the illness is severe enough you completely scrap the schedule and deal with the repercusion effectively. But, in this last week I went with the former method: attending school, clubs and work shifts. So over this weekend I have been going throught the rapid recovery stage, though I have been slowly improving over the week.
    The issue now is that though I have completed a lot of work I am not productive. This may sound odd, how can I be unproductive if I have completed work? The issue is not how much I have completed but more how I have gone about it and how I have used my relaxation time. In my case most of the work has been done out of necessity without much focus or learning, basically ticking a done box, the part I was annoyed with until yesterday was that my relaxation time had been completed filled with youtube. Now I am all for youtube, just in moderation, so given that all my time had (in my view) been lost I was quite miffed.
    And this is why I say a milder cold is worse. The issue is that with a mild cold you are able to complete work and activities, and more often than not your brain is still operating at the full capacity it's your body that is a bit lacking. This means that you (or maybe just I) feel that you are not working or doing as much as you could be doing. Or when you do decide to relax or take a break more frequently than you normally would (because you are tired) you feel you are wasting time. In essence, your brain hasn't given up on the previous schedule and work effort which your body just can't cope with. In the case of a severe illness your brain will either also be taken down or will realise the supidity in continuing as you did.
    So how to deal with this (hopefull uncommon) issue? Importantly, it is not a major issue, or possibly not even an issue for most people, but personally it is. I think in general you need to understand the work load your body can take, and also what activities your body can regenerate with (eg. reading, playing music, crocheting, etc.). For example, I know that I can have bursts of high intensity, focused work intermixed between low intensity working, however if I complete quite a few burst over a fortnight I will need a day of relaxation. I also know watching media, reading, playing music and crocheting do not take any toll on me.
    Using this information I can then set up a rough schedule, more of a mental note: Every 2 weeks do not do any work on Saturday (This is something I should but do not really follow). But also that instead of watching hours of youtube or netflix I can play some music or crochet in between working sessions. The importance of reading, playing music, crocheting, or any activity you actually have to do, is that you are aware that you are doing something, you realise you are turning the 50th page, playing the piece for the 10th time or reaching the 18 round, so you have a constant check to say get back to work. It's also the same thing over and over, no new videos designed to draw you in. Overall you feel more productive and get more work done (This is why my friends at school wonder how I make things and still get work done). This productivity is what I lost during my illness.
    So back to the illness problem. These small tasks become strenuous to an ill body so they are no longer relaxing. So I revert to youtube watching, something unproductive which I can get sucked into. So they key is to find something almost mindless which I can't get sucked into. What I have thought of is just watching the world go by (I live on a fairly busy street so I can watch people go about their day) whilst also listening to music which I do whilst I work anyway. This gives my body and mind rest time without being dragged into any addictive software. You could also get a tea or a coffee or something to eat. Just enjoy the moment, something we should all do more and possibly a topic for a different blog thread.
    Importantly, you need to cut yourself some slack when dealing with a cold. Where possible try and take a premptive day off, stitch in time saves nine and all that, because my cold definitely got worse on Wednesday when I should have stayed home. I possible could be cold free by Friday, but I still have the reminants now, anyway.
    Summary
    Deliberately plan into your schedule, or as mental notes, rest days as frequently as you personally need them. During these days it is important to completely forget about work and only focus on things you want to do in the moment don't plan anything (maybe meet ups with friends or movies, lazy activities basically). This means if a cold strikes you have these buffers to help out, but try and take a break as soon as possible to prevent further problems you can then shift your scheduled breaks to get back into the flow. Find productive activities which you can do without much (if any) effort, to complete between working sessions. Something that you actually have to physically do so that you have the constant reminder to get back to work. It should be fairly repetitive or samey so that your impulsive part of the brain gets bored after a while and wants to try something new, use this to get back into work Finally cut yourself slack during and after a cold, find really mindless activities to really relax with, and understand that your body was preoccupied with trying to keep you alive and not with some arbitrary mathemathics homework. Stay healthy
     
  23. Eniac

    What's the Action Plan?

    By Eniac,

    I have not been keeping up with this story or this forum due to personal issues, but what is the plan. I have built up a massive character traits and plot line to follow yet I haven't written anything. I have tried to create something I am not skilled or talented enough to do. As my first piece of personal writing I think I have bitten off more than I can chew. 
    I will keep the same characters and the same general theme but I will probably cut back on detail, rather than aiming for a novella I'll stick with a short story. There is also the issue of the stream of consciousness, as a concept that I have in my head this would work out amazingly but I do not have the practice, time and skill to pull it off without the narrative becoming very stale.
    From this point forward I am going to write out the full story from start to finish so that it is complete, roughly 200-400 words. Then I can flesh it out if I feel the need. This way at any stage I have a finished product. It is not as methodical as I would have liked but this is not a super critical piece of writing it is just a way to get people going and interested in writing more. My head got the better of me and tried to write the best pony fiction ever. 
    I know that the first time will be bad I just have to keep practicing. Besides this is not my job or life's work. Any enough rambling, from now on I will give updates when necessary rather than writing pages of waffle going into too much detail because I am too afraid to write anything for fear of it being terrible. I am also going to go back to basics, nothing fancy, just a good story that someone can read and enjoy.
  24. Eniac

    Trying out narrative

    By Eniac,

    Aaarrrgh. I just have so much work to do and I can't work non stop so I just don't have time!! So I am going to try out writing in the narrative style because I have never done that before!! So we will see how this goes.
    I'll try the landlord, so I have to get into the 'mind' of the landlord late at night. Now most people don't always focus on the task at hand anyway, I am going to start from him saying goodnight to a fellow pony:
     - Goodnight, I will try and remember to get them to you tomorrow morning. At the moment I have to wait for a new visitor. No time to explain now, it's late. - Yea far to late. Look the moon is nearly at it's peak. Though winter is coming so the moon will be higher. But no the moon is still at it's peak so it's the phase of the moon that is important. Actually what's important is that I am freezing, should have brought a coat. I could go get a coat, ah but then knowing sods law he, is it he I can't remember should be obvious though. What was I thinking, oh yes must remember to get the paper work sent to Mr. Field or else I'll be quite a few bits short this next month, how do you remember stuff again. Oh yes repeat the name 5 times
    - Mr. Fields, Mr Fields, Mr. Fields, Mr. Fi. - Mr. I sound like and idiot. this is useless I need to write it down somewhere. Ah yes I have some paper in my pocket. So papers to Mr. Fields ASAP. I wish I could do that ASAP beats standing around in the cold out here waiting for a pony, though he does pay a fair price, more than fair he pays overprice. But then I have to organise groceries? Seems kinda sketchy, like Sketchy himself, glad he has left this town. It was him on the outskirts when Mr. Fields was shouting about missing planks one hundred percent, hundred and ten. But no he was long go by then, don't believe one bit of that he's still biding his time he'll come back. Best buds way back when stopped that pretty swiftly straight after he stole...the thing or was that he asked for some bits for something. He'll be back he doesn't know what to do out there.
    - Mr. Fields. - Nope can't do that just can't in the middle of the night right on the edge of town people would think I'd gone loony. Loony, Is that just werewolves? It has the word lunar, well sort of, must be talking to the moon. It is pretty large must be full moon, definitely clear skies thanks to the weather ponies I am freezing down here. But who's going to go out of their way for a pony waiting for who knows what coming over the horizon. Coming over the horizon. It's not moving with much pace. I'll go meet him but it might not be him might just be the mind, yup I am definitely loony.
    I don't know, this was just word purge but that's generally how internal monologue works. Might have to spin to take in the surroundings. Maybe have him walking to the house not him already being there. Also I do not need to track every train of thought. using the dashes rather than speech marks because speech normally flows into internal monologue seamlessly, this allows the reader to know when something is said out loud. Anything said by another pony will be in quotations
    Anyway, this was the worst post because I am tired and a bit enough of all this work
  25. Eniac

    Chapter1: first look

    By Eniac,

    I don't I will ever come to this in good for the simple reason that I always complete the 'important' jobs first such as school work. Anyway, I get into to it pretty easily because it just my thoughts as I go along. Well I will need to pull together the plot points and narrative from the previous two points for a look into how chapter 1 will be structured.
    Synopsis:
    Eniac arrives at night when no other pony is awake just the landlord. Landlord passes the news of the stranger to a friend and the chain continues. Eventually we reach Sugar Plum and she decides in that moment to find out more. Here the reader also learns about Sugar Plum from her own perspective.

    The landlord is tired so won't be paying close attention to his surroundings. He will mainly be in his own thoughts: the weather is quite cold, well winter is coming and the sky is clear. That's the weather ponies. Maybe they could cover it up a bit for tomorrow. But it shouldn't be too miserable I need to get on with some gardening. I should get a gardening pony would be cheaper, maybe I can get this pony to garden, maybe...maybe he does not pitch...it is late etc.
    It will be more fluid than that but yea, there is no context just straight in. Then Eniac arrives in the distance walking straight to the landlord who gives his opinion of Eniac as he arrives. Eniac just acknowledges what the landlord is saying. He enters the house and closes the door as the landlord is talking. the landlord becomes a bit flustered, anyway unnecessary detail.
    The landlord then tells a friend the next day about this strange and rude new comer who wouldn't talk to him and is dressed completely in rags. The story slowly changes as the message is passed through the ponies with the dialogue becoming more snatched as the message gets closer to Sugar Plum.
    It hits Sugar Plum. The first remark is a random remark from Sugar before settling into the idea of this new pony. Here there is a different image of Eniac with Sugar adding exaggerated characteristics and thinking about how best to approach him. She also thinks about all the meetings with friends and plans for the village she needs to carry out. She also notices things around her on other ponies. The reader gets the feeling that she is very mentally active and very concerned about other ponies in terms of how they see her.
    The voice of the other pony she is talking to starts to slip into her thoughts. She finally says something to the other pony; along the lines of: 'That's fantastic [so and so] but I need to see this new pony!' and then random remarks about future plans and anything that was talked about previously.
    The first chapter will be pretty short just an introduction to Sugar Plum and the arrival of Eniac as well as setting up the narrative for the rest of the story. I may revisit this adding more detail, but I think there is enough here to start making drafts after I have analysed the other chapters.
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