writing A scene from a movie I'm writing

[Teen Buscemi 135]

Slot city (scene 1 "Doc Diamond")

 

Int: A smokey casino,a man in a dark blue suit and a metal mask is sitting with a cigarette in the small diamond shaped slot of his mask.

 

Doc(v.o): That stud you see with the handsome mask is me, Doctor Diamond

 

(Camera cuts to a cop sitting in a cell holding a tape recording)

 

Cop: Real name please

 

Doc: Fine...ugh...Jack Corren

 

Cop: Thank you sir,continue

 

(Cut back to casino. A blonde waitress walks toward Diamond)

 

Wait: Sorry sir,ya'll ain't supposed to smoke in facility

 

(Diamond takes long huff then stands up)

 

Doc: Then I guess i'll have to leave

 

Wait: yes sir,after payin' your bill of course *giggle*

 

Doc: see,i'm waiting for a friend

 

(Cut back to cell)

 

Cop: and that's when you shot her?

 

Doc: No! I shot her after payin' my bill *mockingly giggles*

 

 

 

I may post more later...but anyways give me your feedback!