Catpone Cerberus

I was just at the local pride, and while the atmosphere there was nice and positive, and the music wasn't bad even if i didn't really care for the lyrics, it didn't end up making me happier, quite the opposite actually, I cried when I got home. Because watching all the people having fun and enjoying their time with friends, really made me realize just how alone I am in reality, and have always been, and probably will be forever.

Sure I have a friend, but while long lasting, it's not really that close of a friendship, you won't see us being silly with each other, online friends? sure, but they can't pull you into a half-hug and make a stupid joke about you. The truth is, I have never had anyone I feel close enough to be myself with. Some may ask what about my family? But even though they are great, they cannot provide that kind of connection.

Now, I'm not an idiot, I know someone like that won't just walk in my apartment, but there really isn't any real options, I'm too introverted and cowardly to approach anyone randomly, all events/hobbies are in weekdays so I'm either at work or dead tired from work, and most importantly, I don't drink alcohol. 

The last part may sound random, but it is an actual problem, Finns are drunks, bars are the most common place for people to meet, and sure "need to go outside comfort zone" and blah blah, but seriously, by what chance, a person that doesn't like alcohol, doesn't care for sports, and doesn't like being surrounded by drunk people, would find any kind of fitting company in a bar? (ice hockey is big in Finland)