writing A scratch at life

[Red_Rain 25]

All the time we are in the womb.

We prepare for life.

We prepare for birth.

Then when we leave the womb.

We spend the rest of our natural life dying.

Dying always. Every morning a somber reminder.

A sadness we all share.

And when we die.

 

We wake up.
 

Edited November 26, 2014 by Red_Rain

[Virgil 685]

I like it, has a pretty solid rhythm to it. With the exception of the sentence "then when we leave...", which I would suggest rephrasing, as just the wording kinda messes with the flow. But that would be the only "flaw" in my mind, cuz other than that it's solid writing.

[Red_Rain 25]

Fixed it!

 

(Filler this is filler)