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critique wanted Looking for a good opinion


4HFan

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Hello, I am searching for an opinion on a fan-fic I have recently written for the Summerpalooza 2.0 contest starring Wordplay and one of my OC's Flash Lightning. If anyone is interested please let me know and I will PM you the story.

 

Thanks and brohoofs to anyone who will offer help!


I've been gone from this world for what seems like millennia, Looking for nothing short of a miracle, I only ever wanted to come home, Please won't you let me go? When I have nowhere left I can run away, Will you lie to me, tell me I'll be okay? Close my eyes and lay me in my tomb. Then pull the trigger and send me home.

- Crown The Empire - Millenia

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I'm interested. Could you please pm me the story?

Sure thing! Just give me one moment.


I've been gone from this world for what seems like millennia, Looking for nothing short of a miracle, I only ever wanted to come home, Please won't you let me go? When I have nowhere left I can run away, Will you lie to me, tell me I'll be okay? Close my eyes and lay me in my tomb. Then pull the trigger and send me home.

- Crown The Empire - Millenia

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