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Skye Starlight

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Blog Entries posted by Skye Starlight

  1. Skye Starlight
    I've heard it before. Mass murderers played video-game. Sandy Hook Massacre? Check. That one in Norway a while ago? Yeah, that one too.
     
    Yes, they played video games. That's fact I cannot deny. But there's a limit to what you can infer from that.
     
    So you can imagine my annoyance when today I saw this:
    http://www.wftv.com/news/news/local/student-found-weapons-orange-co-elementary-school/nZ8DK/?ecmp=wftv_social_201312470064
     
    So, a kid played Minecraft and took a gun, hammer and knife to school. So his father blamed the Minecraft, saying "They use hammers to dig and knives and guns to protect themselves from zombies"
     
    He obviously hasn't played the game. That or he's covering his butt with the fact that the gun was his and stored in a drawer.
     
    Anyway, the only thing close to what he described in vanilla is swords, bows and shovels. It actually sounds closer to Terraria, because at least that game has guns, swords and hammers, and use them for the purposes of fighting off monsters and destroying things.
     
    Now, I know this fandom has many member who play video-games. And I know that most of the fandom are normal, if not kinder, decent, human beings. The fact that anyone would blame video-games for violence is staggering for most of the internet. Video-games can reduce stress and preoccupy you. I mean, who hasn't felt better after destroying a building, car, or killing a person whilst playing a game you enjoy? Yelling for a boss to die, running around shooting everything you see. These mindless acts of violence reduce stress and can in fact prevent you from doing those mindless acts of violence in the real world.
     
    But there's a link between these cases of violent crime and video games. I think there is anyway. I'm just not sure what it is. However, I know that video-games can't be the root cause. They might be inspiration, but not motive or means. I mean, who'd kill someone, just to live out their video-game inspired fantasies?
     
    I'm not saying they don't contribute, but they sure aren't the problem. Maybe it's the increase in lazy parents who don't care what their kids see or do. Maybe it's the media hyping up all the murders, revealing minute details of how it happened. Maybe it's the idolizing of violence in all media, including video-games. Maybe it's a mental health issue, and playing video-games has been a way for murderers to cope with things like depression. Maybe it's that people with mental health issues, possibly not diagnosed, play video games, become inspired to kill someone and just so happen to have access to a weapon, thanks to someone else? Or maybe, just maybe, it's a coincidence. Maybe there is no connection at all and the people of the world are just crazy...
     
    Actually, that last one is kinda true. The people of the world are insane, and only a few of us can see it. I accept that I'm somewhat insane. I live with it every day. I have irrational fears, vivid dreams of either horror or light. I fight, I laugh, I imagine things that could never happen, ever. I doubt a single person out there hasn't once thought of committing a crime, be is stealing something small or killing someone they absolutely loathe. It is only those who act upon these insane thoughts that are caught, but everyone has the potential. Most of us just know better, taught by our parents to behave, to feel guilty for things, although there are less and less of them.
    Whatever the reason for these crime, it's complicated, and the media should stop blaming something which has grown to encompass a target market. One which they could make a fortune off of, but don't.
     
    Maybe media outlets should learn that the people of our world are changing, and that the media needs to change with it.
  2. Skye Starlight

    The Giveaway

    By Skye Starlight,

    So, I'm on a site called Chicken Smoothie.
     
    It has these amazing adoptable pets, along with a forums and their Oekaki boards. So, I originally got into this site a few years ago. Before MLP:FiM became a thing. And I fell in love with the pets. Eventually, I branched out to the forums and started drawing on the Oekaki boards.
     
    Nowadays, I'm less about the pets.
    I'm still going to be there, as it's now my platform for digital art. They have a program called Chibipaint, which is better than MS paint, but much more basic than any expensive programs like Photoshop. I like it.
     
    So, today, I decided that, since my pets haven't exactly been doing anything, that I'd give most of them away.
     
    So I sorted through them and picked out the pets I wanted to keep, before setting up a topic in their free adoptables boards. I also set up a special give away for a set of pirate themed pets, so that I may give them as a group, as that's how they're supposed to be.
     
    I've been busy ever since, taking trades and keeping up to date on the give away.
     
    So, if you're on there, I'm Skystar9.
     
    The topic is here: http://www.chickensmoothie.com/Forum/viewtopic.php?f=22&t=1993563
    My gallery is here: http://www.chickensmoothie.com/Forum/oekaki/gallery.php?user=184217
     
    You'll be able to see many MLP pics in there. Including ideas for mane 6 dresses from back when I could barely draw. Also, my newest drawing, my current avatar!
  3. Skye Starlight

    Week 1

    By Skye Starlight,

    So this will be a weekly thing... These post probably won't be long, but I figured some of you would like to see my progress, and maybe make your own!
     
    So, this week was the beginning. I was alone in my apartment on Saturday, somewhat bored. I had been thinking about movement 2 of Area 11's song Bosozoku symphonic, which was title Senbazuru. I had googled what it was. It was the thousand paper cranes I remembered hearing about when I was in primary school.
     
    I decided, being bored, that I'd learn to make paper cranes.
     
    I started here
    Step 6 was difficult to get... It's kind of hard to explain though...
     
    After the 4th I'd figured it out. I could now make one without looking. I'd officially learnt how to make a paper crane!
    But something about them was so amazing that I couldn't stop making them. I listened to area 11 whilst making them, resulting in a somewhat relaxing experience.
     
    By the time I went to bed on Sunday, 22 had been made. I then decided that I was going to make 1000, and hang them somewhere. It is now one of my goals in life... Pretty lame (and easy, though tedious) goal, but whatever.
     
    Unfortunately, progress had slowed when my family got home. Through the week, I made a further 8, bringing my total to 30.
     
    Well, I had made another one, but I gave it to my best friend as a gift. So I've technically made 31, but only 30 thus far are going to the Senbazuru.
     
    I'm probably going to make many more over the course of the next 2 weeks, as Queensland's school holidays have just officially started!
     
    Also, if using A4 paper like I am, the excess is the perfect size for shopping lists... Oh, and fold diagonally to get a square with the A4 sheet and cut off the excess I just mentioned!
     
    Also, make sure you have the space to place all your cranes somewhere. Once you get 40, you can thread them together to make your first chain! The average Senbazuru consists of 25 chains of 40 cranes! And then you can hang it somewhere out of sight and start again! And hope they don't rot or anything...
     
    So yeah... Boredom brings forth the most peculiar impulses...
     
    See you next week!
     
    ~Skye
  4. Skye Starlight

    My Bucket List

    By Skye Starlight,

    I'm not dying, I'm still young... Why would I need a bucket list? I don't... But there are things I want to do in my lifetime. Now, these aren't necessarily easy tasks, nor may they quick to achieve. Most of these, however, aren't all that risky or thrill seeking. In fact, many of these things are quite safe, although not easy things to do.
     
    So, let's get onto my list!
     
    1. Create a Senbazuru (Thousand Paper Cranes)
    2. Go to a Convention (Gaming or Ponies, either would be awesome!)
    3. Travel the world (Europe, America and Japan!)
    4. See Area 11 live (*Insert me squeeing over Sparkles* here*)
     
    ...
     
    What? I'm still working on it!
     
    Okay, so these four small thing are just the little parts of life I want to achieve. I feel like I can rest easy having done them.
     
    I've already calculated that it only takes about 5 minutes per crane, which totals 12 an hour. 1 hour each weekday + 3 hours on weekends = 132 a week, 528 a month. It would only take 2 months!
     
    Going to a convention is obviously going to happen. All I need is money now! Same with seeing Area 11! In fact, I may end up doing both at the same time!
     
    Travelling the world is what I'm really going to have to work for. That's a lot of money to spend! Although I don't need to visit them all in one trip, and I have a long life ahead of me, it's still going to be a challenge.
     
    Lucky I'm good with money...
    I'll report back when I've completed one of these tasks.
    I'll be reporting back anyway so... Whatever!
  5. Skye Starlight

    Weekends

    By Skye Starlight,

    2 amazing weekends in a row... This is awesome!
     
    I know, this one isn't done yet, but there's no-one around to disturb my peace... I'll get back to that later.
     
    So, last weekend was my best friend's birthday party! I shall separate it into parts so that you don't get confused...
     
    I'll just give all of us really weird names which aren't our own so that you don't know who we are...
     
    Skye (me), Wendy (My best friend who's birthday we were celebrating), Hazel, Zoe, Jade, Casey (My best friend's boyfriend), Kelly, James (Kelly's boyfriend), Karen, Gilbert, Mitch and Max. Along with my mum (who shall be referenced as such) That's everyone who's going to be mentioned in this tale.
     
    Friday Night: Movie Night.
     
    I arrive at my best friend's house, ready for a night of fun with her and a few other friends. It was a celebration of her 17th birthday, which was really going to happen on Tuesday.
     
    So I turn up and Zoe is already there helping Wendy prepare the food for the evening. I join in making homemade spring rolls, the last thing on the menu left to prepare. Once that's done, we chill for a while. Hazel and Jade turn up eventually and they end up deciding that we're going to do James and Casey's make up. They were also going to do mine...

    So Casey turns up with his gifts, a cute teapot and a cake. We have dinner (The spring rolls were awesome!) then we start the first movie of the night! Mean Girls! Which, being a 17 year old girl, I hadn't seen! The girls just stared at me in disbelief. It wasn't a bad movie... I found it quite hilarious actually, how well it depicts real high-school. Or, at least, how high-school girls act towards each other.
     
    After the movie ends, James arrives. I'd met him once before, but I'd not actually talked to him. At this point the girls manage to whisk Casey off to the bathroom. They didn't give him a full blown makeover, really only working on his eyebrows. In the mean time, James and I talked, mostly about how much we didn't want to have makeovers.
     
    So, after a brief period of tension, we attempt to start the second movie... It doesn't work so we look through the channels for a horror movie... We find one, called and watch it... It's gory and confusing.
     
    After that, the boys go home and us girls decide that we need some nightmare retardant. Cue us watching Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs!
     
    Jade fell asleep early during the movie and towards the end Hazel couldn't stop laughing. Something about a chicken?
     
    After that we all went to bed...
     
    Saturday: Beach gathering
    Hazel and Zoe headed home before Jade, Wendy and I all went to the beach. We grabbed some food from the store for a barbecue and soon arrived at our destination. We waited a while before Gilbert showed up, followed soon after by Casey, Mitch, James and Kelly! Everyone except Casey, Jade and I go for a swim before we fire up the barbie and get cooking! Or so we thought. We'd forgotten the oil, so we used lemonade instead...
     
    It worked at least. Karen was the last to turn up. It had been a while since I'd seen her as she'd left my current school at the end of last year. She'd been in my Biology class. It was nice to catch up.
     
    So after hanging with them all day, I went home. That's where all interesting occurrences ceased so I'll leave it at that. It was awesome actually doing something on the weekend rather than my normal routine...
     
    Friday the 13th: Not so unlucky
    Mum and Max leave for my cousin's wedding. I'm left to fend for myself for 3 nights, and I couldn't be happier about it. School was great too, so I have nothing to complain about this day! Added bonus of having one of the Yogscast staff reply to me on twitter (I need to update my profile) so... Yeah... Everyone must have drawn the bad luck away from me! Also, Butter Chicken for dinner! Yum!
     
    Saturday: Origami Cranes
    All this peace for me to exert my own presence over. I can sing and dance without anyone complaining. I couldn't be happier!
     
    Boredom set in quickly... Which is what caused me to turn the volume up on my computer and dance to some of my favorite songs... And then I found inspiration.
     
    Area 11's song Bosozoku Symphonic has 5 movements. My favorite happens to be movement 2, named Senbuzaru. A senbuzaru is a thousand paper cranes...
     
    So I started making paper cranes, for no reason other than I wanted to make paper cranes... Now I can't stop! They're amazing little things! I have 4 now but they're going to multiply... I'll take one to school on Monday and show my friends. Maybe I'll give Wendy one as a gift! Because I still haven't given her a gift...
     
    And that concludes my amazing twin weekends thus far... I doubt it could get much better, but we'll see!
     

    Skye Starlight Out!
     
    Note: Didn't mean for it to be so long... Wow... Just wow...
    I don't doubt that people stopped reading part way through...
  6. Skye Starlight
    A curious past few days I've had. It was great, but I still don't fully understand why...
     
    Maybe I should start at the beginning of it all.
    I was on YouTube, chilling, watching the Yogscast. I posted a witty comment on one Yogscast Kim's videos.
     
    This one:

     
    She responded.
    Cue minor freakout/squeeing/fangirling/WHATEVER.
    I haven't replied, for fear of sounding like just another fan who's overreacting to her. So I've kept quiet. But I was grinning like a madman all night and into the next day. Which was yesterday.
     
    I got some stuff done yesterday and today. Odd, I'm not normally this productive. Well, maybe I'm just filled with positive energy from Kim... And the dream I had.
     
    Another dream. About the Yogscast, except not.
    This time, it was Sparkles*. Only Sparkles*.
     
    So, this was a timeskip dream, as I like to call them. It takes place over a long period of time, but I only get snippets.
     
    First, Kindergarten. I was being bullied and excluded by all the other kids, and Sparkles* stood up for me. Then, in primary school, Sparkles* and I were talking and smiling and laughing as friends... Lastly, high school, and I'm leaning against Sparkles*, his arms wrapped around me... And then I woke up...
     
    Yes, this does kind of reveal my minor crush on the ginger musician. And no, I'm not ashamed. I love Area 11 like my younger cousin loves One Direction. And she loves One Direction, to the point of obsession. And yes, I may be slightly obsessed with Area 11. Not a problem. No...
     
    Well, maybe a problem. I have their songs stuck in my head every waking moment. Not that I mind. Go FAP, Shi No Barado, Cassandra pt 2... I've learnt the lyrics to them now. I sing them when I'm alone.
     
    Oh yeah, that's the only bad thing in my life right now. My lack of self-confidence. Learning to drive is hard when you're worried you're going to hit everything. I can't sing in public without being acutely aware of who and what is around me. I don't trust my instincts as much as I used to. I feel like a dulled blade, and yet somehow I've been more productive lately.
     
    Everything says that I'm able to do it, but just because I'm able doesn't mean I'm ready. That's an interesting revelation I've had. I don't need someone to tell me I can do it. I believe them, I know I can. But maybe what I need is someone to step back, make me feel comfortable being who I am.
     
    Maybe I can do that at the party I'm going to in a week! My best friend IRL is turning 17 and is having a party! She knows EVERYTHING! Except the guys I'm crushing on. All 4, if you include Sparkles* and Lalna (Yes, I'm a fan of the adorkable scientist, don't judge!)... Yes, that leaves 2 IRL, which I'm totally fine not talking to. Seriously, my self-confidence needs a boost...
     
    But then, would I still be me?
  7. Skye Starlight
    I just got back from shopping. Not that I bought anything. The only thing we got was another book from the cherub series from my younger brother. We were supposed to be getting new shoes, but all the shoe stores were closed.
     
    For added annoyance, I was in the middle of watching an episode of Tengen Toppa Gurren Langa, when I wasn't so much asked as ordered to go shopping.

     
    I ranted about my name a bit. I guess I can tell you my IRL name, because it's so common... Seriously...
    I happened to be named Stephanie, which is the traditional Australian way of spelling it. And it's way to common. Like, I've always known at least one person with the same name as me, often more.
     
    Famous gamers that share my name:
    Kaeyi Dream
    Hex -of the Australian gaming news and review show Good Game
     
    And then there's always at least someone IRL who shares my name too.
     
    But then there was the only bit of the journey I liked. Well, sort of.
    We went and got my brother's book, and my mom asked me if I wanted one, so I took a quick look and...
     
    Oh, hello there John Green's books! Except... The Fault in our Stars was sold out! I was tempted to pick up Looking for Alaska, but decided against it. I wanted TFioS, and I couldn't have it. But I guess that means that it's selling well here, and that's good news.

    I also mentioned that Pokemon X and Y are coming out in short time, and that I still haven't got a birthday present. From anyone I know IRL. At all.
     
    And I ranted a bit. I really didn't like being whisked away on a pointless trip, especially in the middle of something!
     
    But I guess you all know a bit more about me! Now any stalkers can try to find me. Good luck, there's about a million people on Facebook that share my name, and you don't even know my last name!
     
    Actually, that reminds me, my friends had a contest to see who could find me on Facebook first, and they literally spent a week looking for me before I had to start giving them clues! Because I was too lazy to add them myself. They did find me after I dropped them some bigger hints, but it still took them ages!

  8. Skye Starlight
    I had some today. Because my mom had to work and my brother decided he wasn't going to disturb me. I've been on my computer 9 hours now. Mostly watching YouTube videos.
     
    Now my mom is home and is yelling at us for not doing the chores she think we should do automatically. Every weekend. Without messing up once. Despite the fact that we've only ever done all our chores once. She complains, every time. This is, in part, because she's stressed with work, because she cooks, because she puts on the washing, almost every night. Almost. Because sometimes she works late and we have to fend for ourselves.
     
    My mom, she has no hobby, nor a goal she's aiming for. She's stuck in a rut and doesn't know why. She complains about life and does hardly anything about it. She'll talk to her boss if she has a major issue, but she's always complaining about how, "The boss has no idea what she's doing."
     
    And she drags that stress with her, into my life. And I've got other things to worry about! Like, passing my subjects in school!
     
    Which reminds me of the fact that my younger brother, whom I have to share a room with, is a total show-off when it comes to schoolwork.
     
    And the worst part in all of this is that I can't really escape. When I'm in contact with them, it's normally night. Which I won't go out during for my mortal safety, unless there's a party going on only a block or two away. That I've been invited to, and where there's not going to be alcohol, 'cause my mom won't let me go. You know, high-school parties almost always have alcohol. So I rarely get to go to parties.
     
    Not that I mind. I'm not a big fan of most kids at school. Why would I be, they're all loud, they love to gossip, and I just don't feel comfortable around them. There are a few, who are less rebellious and so much kinder, my friends. Though, everyone of my fellow students has realized that I do, in fact, need space and have learned to respect this. And sometimes, I'll show that I'm don't mind being around others sometimes.
     
    That's the thing, when I want to be alone, it's better to leave me alone, but when I'm not wanting to be a total loner, I'm more likely to talk to you if you have learnt my rules of personal space...
     
    I haven't had a hug from a person IRL in a while though. I'm not yet comfortable with my new friends to do that yet though. I probably never will be, and that's alright with me. It's the only downside to changing schools, compared to only losing one or two friends at any one time when you stay at the same school, you lose all of them. At once... What's worse is that I couldn't contact them because I had no internet... So, I've now lost all my old friends and have new ones who still don't fully understand my peculiarity. But I'd never expect them to!
     
    But, back to my time alone issues... I don't exactly have a place to get away from my mom and younger brother. I've just had to put up with it. And deal with the strain it's put on me. Like I'm not under enough stress already.
     
    It's fine, everything is just fine... I'm just a little bit tired of it all.
     
    At least I have my 3 km walk to and from school! When I'm normally, but not always, alone. I have a friend I sometimes walk home with, and she's the only one I've told all my secrets to. Well, almost. She doesn't know who I'm crushing on. She knows I'm a brony, that I have over 100 people I'm subscribed to on YouTube, that I adore the Yogscast, that I play Pokemon and Zelda... She's the only person I feel I can trust at this time. She's my Best Friend.
     
    And it's sad that I can't trust people in my life, especially family.
     
    But that's enough sad, sappy, sentimental stuff. I have YouTube to watch!
  9. Skye Starlight
    Life,illogical at the best of times, down right confusing at the worst.
     
    Also, I've taken it upon myself to do more chores around the house, and try and say "Thank you" more often, along with "Please"
     
    Why? Because my mom doesn't think my brother and I show her enough respect. Because she's sick of us not doing the chores. Because she's been really stressed with work, and my brother and I aren't making her life any easier. Because her stress is stressing me out.
     
    So, by doing more work, I'm decreasing the stress and frustration in my household. It's peaceful, finally. My younger brother doesn't seem as demanding lately either... He's bored though.
     
    Another thing, we're a family of introverts, with the exception of my mom who is an extrovert. We don't tend to do much together anymore... I remember, we used to play Mario Kart Wii... I'd almost always win. My mom wasn't very good, so we'd tend to get on an even playing field in Wii Sport, when we'd play bowling. I kept my cool, whilst my mom and younger brother laughed. Kinda how I managed a couple strikes in a row once. But that was only once or twice a year. I think we need to do it more often.
     
    Also, my mom was at least tipsy when we did these things. She'd wobble a bit, slur occasionally, but nothing too bad. She was never blind-drunk. It think it helped her have fun coming in last in Mario Kart. Me and my brother never touched her wine, cause we knew we had a better chance sober.
     
    Oh, the memories...
     
    But things haven't been the same lately. My mom and brother have had trigger-hair tempers, and I've noticed a shift that way in myself as well. Which is why I decided to change things. Which is why I decided to step out and take on that extra bit of responsibility.
     
    I think this may be attributed to a growing sense of maturity in me.
     
    Also, a lot is going on in my life right now, so expect more blogs from me really, really soon!
     
    Happily a friend
    Skye Starlight
  10. Skye Starlight
    I don't normally blog more than once a day, but this one's much more upbeat and random... It's also completely off topic from my other one.
     
    Okay, I think I've been watching way too much Yogscast lately. I've had 5 dreams about them in the past 2 weeks. That's all the dreams I've had in that space of time.
     
    The first, I was commander of a squadron, and we were killing stuff in a mountain fortress, and then there was a nuke, and an avalanche... And then Duncan and I dug out Lewis, Simon apparently dug himself out, and Hannah... She was a plant... Which confused my brain enough to wake me up.
     
    I thought nothing of it. Laughing at the fact that Hannah was a plant.
     
    Then the next one came... I don't remember much, just that it had something to do with the Yogscast.
     
    Then the third one. Duncan and I went camping. Like, normal, realistic camping.
     
    The fourth one was Sjin and Rythian in a maze made by Duncan. The words, "We have to work together" was all I heard.
     
    The fifth? Everyone was in a murder mystery. Which is strange because I don't really like murder mysteries. But apparently Lewis, Rythian and Sjin had been killed and everyone was panicking. I remember Hannah screaming... That's about it. Oh, and Duncan and Simon were there too...
     
    I'm beginning to think I've gone insane with this.
     
    What's probably craziest. None had Zoey in them, and all had Duncan. Zoey is my favorite though, with Duncan being second to her. To have these 2 at opposite ends of the spectrum, it seems odd...
  11. Skye Starlight
    I have many talents: Drawing, Singing, Playing Video-Games, Absorbing Knowledge.
     
    And I'm the middle child in my family! Yay! The only reason I can see that I ever got any attention is because I'm the only girl out of 3!
     
    But there is a minor problem... My younger brother gets nearly straight A's while I seem to struggle to pass at all. I live in his shadow. He's not even trying and getting A's, whilst I work my little ass off to pass my subjects! He's going to get a letter from the principal which apparently looks amazing on a resume, not to mention he got student of the term earlier this year. The little show off...
     
    Mum and dad just talked about marks and stuff, and apparently they're amazed at his marks, and less than happy about mine... They only have my younger brother's marks to compare to mine. My teachers think I could do so much better, but I really do need help with a lot of work and stress...
     
    It's hard for me to be motivated, because I know I'm never going to be as brilliant as my younger brother. I know my parents and teachers will always be disappointed in my marks. They complain my marks are all over the place and inconsitent, but there is a pattern! I have showcased my ability to learn knowledge, and my co-ordination is alright, but when it comes to analysing, evaluating and deciding, I struggle. Unless there's been an example given to me, in an Auditory fashion, I'm going to struggle. I've started struggling in more and more areas.
     
    People think I'm not trying, and I guess that's partly true, but it's not for laziness, but being unmotivated. People have ridiculed me for chasing my dreams, with 2 possible outcomes: I become a YouTuber, particularly a Let's Player, or I become part of a game dev team! To everyone, they look at me and think I have wasted potential. They see my drawings, they hear my singing, they look at my exam marks and test my knowledge. They stare at me and think, "Why are you doing this to yourself?"
     
    I laugh, I smile, and I want to bring smiles to other people's faces any way I can, but I'm shy, easily scared and I don't like crowds. Which is why working on YouTube (where I can work from home and not have to deal with performing in front of a crowd IRL) or developing games in a small team (Allowing myself to become invested in creating something I love) is perfect. I have many talents, but I only have a one passion. Video-games.
     
    You'd wonder why I draw Pokemon and Minecraft all the time. In fact, other than cats, marine animals, ponies, Zelda and real life, that's all I draw. And I'll tend to combine these, so I draw IRL minecraft or minecraft cats, or minecraft ponies or IRL ponies... Or MC Zelda, or Zelda ponies... Drawing is my hobby, it's what I do to relax okay? It's really good when I can go down the park or the beach and chill there.
     
    My ideal relaxing day:
    Take my pencil case, drawing book, a bottle of water and whatever money I've got, chill down the beach or in the park and just draw. If I had an ipod I'd take that with me and listen to music, and when I got bored I might get myself a bubble blower and I'd watch them float by. If I could, I'd watch the sun set before packing up and walking home to watch YouTube. But I wouldn't be sitting still all day, no! I might take a ball with me and toss that around a bit. I might make a sand castle (or dig a small hole).
     
    Does that not sound like an amazing day? It's the only thing I love to do other than play video-games, and it's much more relaxing! If I was on YouTube, I might vlog on days when I'm not making gaming vids. Take my camera down the beach and show everyone how amazing it is to be me. I'd sing songs, I'd draw, I'd game, I'd live doing what I love.
     
    And that's what I really want.
  12. Skye Starlight
    *Mature Themes - 15+ preferably*
     
    I think the whole idea of school is a horrific attempt at making us robots.
    but in this blog post, there's a few points I'd like to bring up-
     
    Assessment Stress
    Loneliness
    Bullying
    Gossip
    Peer Pressure
    Emotional Warfare
     
    Geez... That's a lot to cover... Well, better get started!
     
    Assessment Stress:
    Why must we be assessed on things? Because they need to ensure we've learned these skills... But why do they have to do it in such a way as to create so much unneccesary stress for the students? I mean seriously? The stress of Senior Year is literally driving me insane. I can't properly relax, leaving me with MORE stress. I'm one of those not-so-rebellious girls, so I don't drink, smoke, do drugs, etc.This results in having fewer ways to releive stress. It doesn't help my home isn't exactly a restful place...
     
    Emotional Warfare: (essentially all the other's summed up into one!)
     
    Well, I've been feeling a bit lonely lately... I really need a hug from a friend, but I'm not good enough friends with anyone at my new school yet. This is messing with my emotions. What am I supposed to do about that?
     
    Recently, me and a few of my friends have had to deal with a slight bullying problem. This also caused stress for me... The bullying problem should soon be resolved though, so I'm beginning to relax... A bit...
     
    Which brings me to my next topic, Gossip! I hate it! The bully essentially called EVERYONE a b*^@# behind their backs. She's emotionally unstable and, even though I thought she'd be trustworthy, she's proven herself otherwise. She even makes up stuff to make herself look like the victim in all this. It's hurt her relationship with many of her closest friends.
     
    And lastly, Peer Pressure. I'm one of the few people who can stand up against the odds... If I don't think it's a good idea, I'll say it, and I'll not be convinced otherwise without logical proof. I'm not easily swayed, despite keeping an open mind. But others don't have as thick a skin as I. If everyone is doing it, then they're going to be swayed. I worry for their health, what with all the "hip" things to do like drink, smoke, have wild sex... You know, those things that can result in injury, illness and death? I can't beleive it...
     
    All of this adds up to unneccesary drama and stress... Stuff that a teenager, in the final stages of identity formation, shouldn't have to deal with.
     
    Of course, school is a great way to meet new people and gain a variety of friends. Who knows whether one of them will become a doctor, a teacher, a game dev or a star, and such a variety can be good for ones ability to understand other people. However, the pressure put on students, in my personal opinion, is just too great. There is a reason that mostly young adults have mental disorders such as depression or anxiety.
     
    I don't have any experience in the real world, so I wouldn't know how you all feel, but I've been listening to a lovely girl on YouTube called Zoey Proasheck, and she recently said, "High school won't define the rest of your life, what you do now will." Coming from a girl with anxiety, who's happily making YouTube videos and has a girlfriend now, that's a lot. She claims to have copped it in high school, and I can't say I wouldn't have expected that. She's got a lot of unusual things about her, but that's why her fans love her, because being normal is over-rated, and she exemplifies the amazing capabilities of the human race. What hasn't killed her, has made her so much stronger, so much more determined to be an amazing person. And now she's working with people millions of other's would love to simply meet. She's part of the Yogscast, and she possibly has the most loyal fan-base of them all!
     
    Also, motivational media recently presented at my school. The message? MAD for life. MAD standing for Make A Difference. You can be MAD for life at any time, in any situation. If you really try and take life by the horns, you can go where YOU want.
     
    Yay! Now I'd better get cracking on this assignment I have due tomorrow... I'm just struggling to do anything analytical at the moment, don't mind me... Or my misery and stress...
  13. Skye Starlight

    Magic

    By Skye Starlight,

    I am not talking about the magic in fantasy. I'm talking about the magic that touches all of us! The magic present in the real world! The innate magic of beauty and love.
     
    Stars are beautiful. Tiny flecks of light scattered across a deep indigo sky. There's something magical about just staring up into them. We are filled with awe, passion, inspiration or hope when we see them. But it isn't always like this for people.
     
    I was once afraid of the night sky, afraid of the stars, the moon, and the shadows between. I had an overactive imagination, I still do, but I wasn't taught about the spiritual side of stars. I was told they were great balls of burning gas, just like the sun. I was told that when certain stars die, they become black holes. I was told that black holes indiscriminately sucked in everything, including light. I was told black holes could destroy the world. But it was never mentioned how rare black holes were, that I never had to worry. I lived in fear of the night sky. I could never look up without thinking about this, and it limited my life.
     
    Do you know how hard it is to live in fear of the night? Luna would not be happy...
     
    But nowadays I love the stars. They are a beauty to behold. The moon is a gorgeous orb of light. The night is just as amazing as the day. What sparked this change in me? The simple idea that stars might be more than just flaming balls of gas. Stars shine bright in the darkness. They are a metaphor for hope. Their beauty leaves us in awe. They inspire us to do better (well, they inspire me anyway). They're a perfect setting for romance and passion. They soothe the soul. They bring us together. They truly are magical.
     
    I have been contemplating this kind of magic. It is in love, friendship, and all things in this world that are beautiful. Waterfalls, rainbows, stars and the moon. The sun on your back on a cold winters day, the sweet smell of flowers in spring, the cool splash of water in summer, the fallen leaves in autumn. It is in everyday life, in those moments of joy. It is in all that is good in the world.
     
    But that doesn't stop it from succumbing darkness. Jealousy is often born of love. Narcissism, born of self beauty. It is an unfortunate side effect of living in a world with both light and darkness.
     
    So... what are your thoughts on this kind of magic?
  14. Skye Starlight
    There's a lot.
    1. Zoey and Rythian.
     
    To those that don't know these 2, they're part of the Yogscast. If you don't know who the Yogscast are, you live in a hole.
     
    Rythian is from the Netherlands. Zoey is from the UK. Together, they've created an epic story! With revenge, romance, deaths, betrayal, war... And a Dinosaur! And it's all played out with Minecraft Mods. Here's the best bit. They're acting as their characters, so none of it is real. Everyone in the Yogscast are friends and simply enjoy acting as enemies. They started in Tekkit, but it's recently changed to FTB.
     
    Zoey is actually pretty awesome in doing this as she has Anxiety disorder. And she's making videos on YouTube where all the haters lurk, whilst dealing with this. It shows that you can overcome anything to do what you love, and I'm sure she loves it. She's doing what a lot of people dream of, working with the Yogscast!
     
    And of course, I've come to adore the shipping, which was originally brought about by the fans, then canonized by Rythian and Zoey in their story, and now there's more shipping than ever. You eventually become so enraptured by the story that when Rythian and Zoey design a minor tragedy you can do nothing but feel for the characters! And so, that's been on my mind a lot...
     
    2. Okay, so a tiny IRL thing here. My real name is Steph... Out of all the people I've heard of that share my name, 3 (including myself) are Gamers. Kaeyi Dream (inthelittlewood's [Martyn's] GF believe it or not) and Hex of the show Good Game that shows here in Australia on the ABC. Yeah, the government pays Hex and Bajo (Who's name is Steven of all things!) to play games and review them... It's possibly the most popular Australian program on the ABC. I know like, 9 Stephs, so that's over a third of all Steph's I've heard of... This blew my mind... Of course, because Martyn Littlewood works with the Yogscast, it might be confusing if I ever worked there... One Steve limit people! Wait... Steve means the same as... Really? Why must I be cursed with such a common name!
     
    3. Zelda. I've been working on that a lot lately... I've nearly gotten 100% for the second time in Spirit Tracks... It's kinda self explanatory.
     
    4. A rainbow of gamer girls.
     
    So, including Hex, Kaeyi and Zoey, and adding Hannah (another Yogscast member), Donnabellez, Dodger and Lucahjin, I have 7 gamer girls I'm a true fan of... Let's organize them by color shall we?
     
    Lucahjin has dark red hair, Zoey's minecraft skin has lighter reddish orange hair, Hannah's blonde, Dodger currently has green hair, Hex has dark hair so I'll put her at blue, Donnabellez has brown hair but loves purple so she's Indigo, and Kaeyi has pink hair, so she's Violet... It's a rainbow...
     
    When I noticed I'm like "WTF?" and I laughed at the randomness... Of all the things, I have to have a rainbow for the girls I aspire to be like! Rainbow Dash would be proud!
     
     
    And that's all I've really been thinking about for the past week! It's been a peculiar week...
  15. Skye Starlight
    Well, here I am, about to tell you the hilarious acts of everyone but me... And my teacher who acted as MC for the night. I get performance anxiety okay! Okay, maybe it's more than performance anxiety, but I have never been to psychiatrist so I don't know just how bad whatever is plauging my mind is... Whatever it is, I'm able to function socially and mentally, so it can't be that bad...
     
    Well that was a tangent. On with the hilarity!
     
    We started with safety, in case anything went wrong... So one of the teachers made sure that there were 2 buckets of water, which he slowly spilled. He then tripped with one of the buckets and dumped the contents on one of the girls. There was nothing left in it, and past the first squeel of fear laughter broke out. It was a nice way to set the tone for the night.
     
    Now the order may not be what it was, but I assure you it doesn't really matter from here on out.
     
    So a group of girls went first, with a dating game! You remember those old game-shows where a girl would ask questions to a group of guys and at the end she'd pick the one she liked most? Yeah, that was that. So they chose 3 guys, all hot stuff, including the crush I mentioned in the last few blogs. The girl was voiced by one of the many international students on the trip. She asked questions and everyone was giggling at the responses and her reactions. In the end, she chose guy 3, who wasn't my crush. They blindfolded him and brought out the 'girl'. I said she was voiced by the international student. However, 'she' was one of the male teachers dressed up as a girl. When he walked out, everyone cracked up. The teacher went up and slowly caressed guy 3's hair before taking off the blindfold, at which point guy 3 looked behind him and nearly fell over as he tried to get away.
     
    Laughter filled the air by this point.
     
    So the next group was the "Alpha" group who basically said what each letter stood for and everyone was kind of "meh" about it.
     
    Then 2 teachers stood behind a screen covering them from the waist down. They took it in turns to kneel down behind the screen. Here's some of what they said:
     
    "Oh, it's so warm!"
    "It tastes so good!"
    "It's so milky!"
     
    They then lift up 2 coffee cups and say: "What? What were you thinking we were doing? It's just coffee!"
     
    Next was the group that I would have gone in had I not been incapable of performing. What did they do? Well, let's just say that waiting for a bus had never been so hilarious.
     
    Can you imagine an alien skeptic, mute girl, a girl in a tutu singing "I'm a little teapot", a girl in a morph suit, a germ fearing freak and a slob taking it in turns to freak eachother out? Only ever 2 on stage at a time, and yet it remained hilarious.
     
    A few stories were passed on by other teachers, but nothing important. There was the slightly offensive sketch about "the arabic alphabet (A is for Arab, G is for Grenade)" and a group of girls (badly) sang the German National Anthem... Not too impressive.
     
    Of course there was one more group. The popular girls who decided on a song and dance medley. It included twerking and unreachable high notes. It wasn't funny, but it was still good.
     
    All of the student performances were judged and scored. At the end of the night, they announced the winners!
     
    1.Song and Dance Medley
    2.Bus Stop
    3.Date Show
    4.German National Anthem
    5.Alpha
    6.Arabic Alphabet
    7.Me. Cause I didn't perform and as such I got a score of 0. People seemed to understand though and no-one pressed me about it.
     
    It was a decent night overall, but I felt bad for not performing like everyone else. I always hear about how "Everyone can do it, so can you!" but... I can't... I hate people who say that. Just because everyone can do it doesn't mean I can... I can't even ride a bike, one of the main reasons why I walk 3km to and from school whilst my younger brother rides. That's 6km (3.728227153422 miles) a day. Also, don't you dare say I don't get enough exercise!
  16. Skye Starlight
    Friday, 31st May - Sunday, 2nd June
    So, no-one know's me, huh? Okay... I'm a little disappointed, but relieved too...
     
    The next few days was a bit of a blur, so it might be out of order. We were introduced to our assignments, the reason we were on the island. We separated into groups and planned our feild work. There was a walk around the island, which only took an hour, and another snorkel which I didn't get to participate in!
     
    So uh, there was also the fish dissection, boating which was ruined by a sudden dousing of rain, and another snorkel which I didn't participate in. That makes 3/3 snorkels I've not participated in! There was only 4 snorkeling sessions on the trip!
     
    I also began to lose my temper with my group... I don't normally lose my temper, but being unable to spend much time apart inhibited my ability to control my temper.
     
    I also grew closer to my crush, but someone was growing even closer... It was subtle though.
     
    Also...
     
    BABY TURTLES!!!!!
     

     
    That was the reaction of everyone when the guys found 5 little cuties breaking their heads out of the sand during the day. They were late and escaping the nest at the wrong time of day, so we put them in a box with wet sand for release later that night.
     
    We named them: Flyrtle, Myrtle, Squirtle, Purple, and Turtle... Yes, we named a baby turtle "Turtle"
    We ran out of names, okay?
     
    Monday, 3rd June
     
    Field work and arguments...
     
    And then we did the write up for the dissection... We had 4 hours and could use any low-tech resources we had brought. We didn't have any internet access on the island anyway, so it was pretty hard to cheat. We could talk to each other, we could eat, we could drink, we could do anything we wanted to, as long as we put in what we had at the end of the 4 hours. Was a very short 4 hours, to say the least...
     
    Our minds were fried.
     
     
    Tuesday, 4th June.
     
    Field work and the final snorkel... Which was only for those that had finished their field work... Which I hadn't. Yay for not getting to snorkel for the entire trip!
     
    Well, there was another argument, which a teacher interrupted and realized that I (the minority) was right... Lesson: Just because the majority thinks the answer's correct doesn't mean that it's correct...
     

     
    Wednesday, 5th of June.
     
    We packed up! My group took forever... We did it though, and soon everyone was on the beach chilling, waiting for the barge back to the mainland! And I overheard something...
     
    "It looks like things are going great!"
    "Will you're parent's let you have a boyfriend?"
    "Yeah... I hope so..."
     
    I had no doubt of who they were talking about... I stopped for a moment, and decided on my plan of attack... Or defense, seeing as, instead of getting under them and trying to break them up, I've decided to step down and let them play their relationship out. Put a shell up and relax, let her have her fun... These things don't normally last long, especially with his reputation as a player. He even got an award on the island for almost always having a few girls chasing after him... There was, of course, myself, the girl who actually snagged him, and another girl who I thought at first was going to snag him...
     
    What? He's obviously an ideal mate... He's normal, confident... He's got hidden depths of sensitivity, disguised by his athletic exterior... He's intelligent... He's got a sense of humor... What's not to like?
     
    And no-one IRL knows of this normal part of me... I tend to stick to the "I'm different and I know it!" idea, and I tend to avoid popular things among "normal" people...
     
    Barge ride back:
     
    Remember how I said that I couldn't rest after 1 sea-sickness tablet? Well I took 2 this time... They have the unfortunate effect of making you drowsy, something I knew about before hand. After packing stuff back onto the barge (we were the last group on the island) I went upstairs, lay down on the floor (like everyone else) and fell asleep within 20 minutes of getting on the barge... I woke up 40 minutes before we arrived at the mainland. After unpacking the barge and collecting all my stuff, I went to McDonald's before going home, having a shower and going back to sleep...
     
    And that was my trip to a coral cay!
     
     
    ...
     
     
    AHH! I forgot something! I FORGOT RED FACES! HOW COULD I FORGET THE BEST NIGHT OF THE CAMP!?
     
    It's basically a talent show where everyone gets into groups and does an act... I'll post it in my next blog! Also, don't expect me in it... I have performance anxiety, to the point it interferes with some assessment... Why would I want to perform in front of people when It wasn't even important?
     
    Be prepared for LAUGHS!
     
    EDIT: I made a lot of spelling errors... I've fixed 'em all up now!
  17. Skye Starlight
    This is another multi-part series entailing my life! Except it details only a week of my life... A really eventful week...
     
    So, a bit of back story on this:
    Wednesday, 29th of May, 2013.
     
    I say my farewells to you all here and hop on a barge heading to a coral cay in the afternoon. Why was I going to a coral cay? Beyond the fact that it's a coral cay and is, therefore, gorgeous that is. My school decided to take me there to do some field work! But I'll detail that later.
     
    The barge trip: I take 1 sea-sickness tablet, and it's not quite enough. I feel sick. Too sick to rest, not enough to throw up, unlike the 6 other students beside me...thankfully... I just sit there and watch the waves as they toss the boat around.
     
    Thursday, 30th of May 2013.
     
    Oh, hi there! I still haven't slept at this stage! We unload the barge, load the group leaving and set up camp. And then we sleep, at about 3 in the morning...
     
    Day 1 on the island! I'm having personal issues that make really unnerved. We're supposed to go snorkeling today, but I can't. The teachers understand and I end up helping someone with her flippers. We're also introduced to all sorts of safety information.
     
    The sun sets, and we're introduced to the "awards" given out nightly.
     
    "Care Bear" which is not actually a care bear of Hasbro's creation, is a bear given to people who do nice things for others. Remember how I helped someone? Guess who got this?
     

     
    This was my first trip with this school, and, as such, my first chance to get care bear! Either I'm really lucky, really good at creating positive things out of bad situations, or it really says something about my strong sense of kindness. Or a mix of those reasons, that could work.
     
    One of the other awards was "Princess" which was given to people who squealed, screamed or whined about something. Like not having mobile coverage when we were told there wasn't going to be any. Or knowing there's only one mobile service that can work on parts of the island, and then going and buying a brand new, expensive phone with that service. Or a guy, squealing like a little girl after other guys had scared him. Or someone getting the tiniest cut on her foot and limping and wincing when it wasn't even bleeding! You can imagine the laughter when people were nominated for this award.
     
    The other one was Grumpy Bear/Gorilla/Yeti. It was also known as Duck Up. It's basically for anyone that screwed up. So what things were people nominated for? Spilling their dinner on themselves 3 times, having a voice crack in the middle of role call, nominating oneself for this award... I'm serious, someone nominated their self for this award. Multiple times, in fact. He actually managed to get all 3 awards! Insane, right?
     
    Well... That was the first installment of this!
     
    A note: I have a crush, who was also on this trip. He will be talked about in this blog. If he's reading this... Well, I haven't mentioned anything about him yet, so he wouldn't know... Please don't read on if you think you know me IRL. I doubt anyone does, but I'm just making sure. I prefer to keep online and IRL separate. However, if you think you know me IRL, PM me! We can talk about it!
  18. Skye Starlight
    ISNP that is my personality type:
    You can find the test, the personality types of other users, and which pony it correlates to here:
    http://mlpforums.com/topic/1970-mbti-personality-test/
     
    A quick overview on what the personality types are and what they're composed of.
     
    Firstly you can be an Extrovert or an Introvert. Now you might think this means "Oh, extrovert means being social and introvert means being antisocial/shy" Well, you're right, and wrong. It really determines where you get your energy from, the outside (extroverted) or the inside (introverted). When you get your energy from the outside, you tend to prefer to be around other people and feel uncomfortable on your own. You work better in a team, and have large social groups. That's not to say that introverts can't work well in teams or have large social groups. Introverts just get tired out when around lots of people for extended periods of time, and they tend to be a little more thoughtful. They don't crave social interaction, most of the time...
     
    Next, you're either a Sensing or iNtuitive person. Yes, that N is supposed to be big... This is basically how you perceive the world. Sensing people tend to be more down to earth, realistic. They perceive the world around them. They also tend to plan all the little details. Intuitive people tend to day-dream a bit more and jump to conclusions. They see the big picture and struggle to plan.
     
    Thirdly, people judge the world through one of two ways, either Thinking or Feeling. Thinkers are logical, honest people. They trust in logic and tend to stop and think. It's harder to tug at the heartstrings of a thinker. Feelers, on the other hand, trust their feelings and values. They tend to be overly empathetic. This doesn't mean that if you're a thinker you disregard other people's feelings, or if you're a feeler that you won't hurt a fly. In fact, if you're a thinker, you may just go about doing good things logically, because people will like you more if you do, and if you're a feeler you might be swayed to think that certain people should die, and that it's you're responsibility to ensure they do.
     
    Lastly, you can be good at either Perceiving or Judging. If you'd note my use of Perceive in the Sensing and iNtuition paragraph and Judge in the Thinking and Feeling paragraph. This basically represents which of the two personality indicators above suits you best. Judgers have the tendency to use their thoughts or feelings more in everyday circumstances. Perceivers on the other hand, use their senses or intuition more. Judgers tend to be a little more vocal, even if introverted. Perceivers tend to be quiet and observant.
     
    That took 2000 word to explain, but anywho! Now it's time for MY personality type, and my pony!
     
    I am an ISNP... Barely, seeing as I'm really balanced between sensing and intuition. So what does that say about me?
     
    Well, the answer is going to be copypasta from here: http://typelogic.com/
     
    ISFPs are the first to hear the different drummer. Many eagerly plunge into new fashions, avant garde experiences, 'hip' trends--some even setting the trends.
    More in touch with the reality of their senses than their INFP counterparts, ISFPs live in the here and now. Their impulses yearn to be free, and are often loosed when others least expect it. The ISFP who continually represses these impulses feels 'dead inside' and may eventually cut and run. (One ISFP friend has become nonambulatory within the past few years. He will still, on impulse, leave home in the middle of the night and go to Las Vegas or wherever, regardless of the difficulties of his physical condition.)
    ISFPs may be quite charming and ingratiating on first acquaintance, flowing with compliments which may (or may not) be deserved. On other occasions, the same individual may be aloof and detached. Some ISFP males are fiercely competitive, especially in sport or table games, and may have great difficulty losing. This competitive nature, also seen in other SP types, sometimes fosters 'lucky,' 'gut' feelings and a willingness to take risks.
    Organized education is difficult for the majority of ISFPs, and many drop out before finishing secondary education. Their interest can be held better through experiential learning, at which many excel. ISFPs will practice playing an instrument or honing a favored skill for hours on end, not so much as practice as for the joy of the experience.
     
    I chose to bold the things that really, really stick out to me and reflect me. However, I figured it might be nice to point out that I'm not entirely ISFP. I'm part INFP, so here's what that says:
    INFPs never seem to lose their sense of wonder. One might say they see life through rose-colored glasses. It's as though they live at the edge of a looking-glass world where mundane objects come to life, where flora and fauna take on near-human qualities.
    INFP children often exhibit this in a 'Calvin and Hobbes' fashion, switching from reality to fantasy and back again. With few exceptions, it is the NF child who readily develops imaginary playmates (as with Anne of Green Gables's "bookcase girlfriend"--her own reflection) and whose stuffed animals come to life like the Velveteen Rabbit and the Skin Horse:
    INFPs have the ability to see good in almost anyone or anything. Even for the most unlovable the INFP is wont to have pity.
    Their extreme depth of feeling is often hidden, even from themselves, until circumstances evoke an impassioned response:
    Of course, not all of life is rosy, and INFPs are not exempt from the same disappointments and frustrations common to humanity. As INTPs tend to have a sense of failed competence, INFPs struggle with the issue of their own ethical perfection, e.g., perfo rmance of duty for the greater cause. An INFP friend describes the inner conflict as not good versus bad, but on a grand scale, Good vs. Evil. Luke Skywalker in Star Wars depicts this conflict in his struggle between the two sides of "The Force." Although the dark side must be reckoned with, the INFP believes that good ultimately triumphs.
    Some INFPs have a gift for taking technical information and putting it into layman's terms. Brendan Kehoe's Zen and the Art of the Internet is one example of this "de-jargoning" talent in action.
     
    That was longer than expected... I may also need a quick look at the INTPs and ISTPs, because, truth be told, I've got elements of the Thinkers too! So here's both of those:
     
    INTPs are pensive, analytical folks. They may venture so deeply into thought as to seem detached, and often actually are oblivious to the world around them.
    Precise about their descriptions, INTPs will often correct others (or be sorely tempted to) if the shade of meaning is a bit off. While annoying to the less concise, this fine discrimination ability gives INTPs so inclined a natural advantage as, for example, grammarians and linguists.
    INTPs are relatively easy-going and amenable to almost anything until their principles are violated, about which they may become outspoken and inflexible. They prefer to return, however, to a reserved albeit benign ambiance, not wishing to make spectacles of themselves.
    A major concern for INTPs is the haunting sense of impending failure. They spend considerable time second-guessing themselves. The open-endedness (from Perceiving) conjoined with the need for competence (NT) is expressed in a sense that one's conclusion may well be met by an equally plausible alternative solution, and that, after all, one may very well have overlooked some critical bit of data. An INTP arguing a point may very well be trying to convince himself as much as his opposition. In this way INTPs are markedly different from INTJs, who are much more confident in their competence and willing to act on their convictions.
    Mathematics is a system where many INTPs love to play, similarly languages, computer systems--potentially any complex system. INTPs thrive on systems. Understanding, exploring, mastering, and manipulating systems can overtake the INTP's conscious thought. This fascination for logical wholes and their inner workings is often expressed in a detachment from the environment, a concentration where time is forgotten and extraneous stimuli are held at bay. Accomplishing a task or goal with this knowledge is secondary.
    INTPs and Logic -- One of the tipoffs that a person is an INTP is her obsession with logical correctness. Errors are not often due to poor logic -- apparent faux pas in reasoning are usually a result of overlooking details or of incorrect context.
    Games NTs seem to especially enjoy include Risk, Bridge, Stratego, Chess, Go, and word games of all sorts. (I have an ENTP friend that loves Boggle and its variations. We've been known to sit in public places and pick a word off a menu or mayonnaise jar to see who can make the most words from its letters on a napkin in two minutes.) The INTP mailing list has enjoyed a round of Metaphore, virtual volleyball, and a few 'finish the series' brain teasers. INTPs in the main are not clannish. The INTP mailing list, with a readership now in triple figures, was in its incipience fraught with all the difficulties of the Panama canal: we had trouble deciding: whether or not there should be such a group, exactly what such a group should be called, and which of us would have to take the responsibility for organization and maintenance of the aforesaid group/club/whatever.
     
     
    Like their fellow SPs, ISTPs are fundamentally Performers (note the capital 'P' ), but as Ts their areas of interest tend to be mechanical rather than artistic like those of ISFPs, and unlike most ESPs they do not present an impression of constant activity. On the contrary, they lie dormant, saving their energy until a project or an adventure worthy of their time comes along--and then they launch themselves at it. The apparently frenzied state that inevitably ensues is actually much more controlled than it appears--ISTPs always seem to know what they're doing when it comes to physical or mechanical obstacles--but the whole chain of events presents a confusing and paradoxical picture to an outsider.
    ISTPs are equally difficult to understand in their need for personal space, which in turn has an impact on their relationships with others. They need to be able to "spread out"--both physically and psychologically--which generally implies encroaching to some degree on others, especially if they decide that something of someone else's is going to become their next project. (They are generally quite comfortable, however, with being treated the same way they treat others--at least in this respect.) But because they need such a lot of flexibility to be as spontaneous as they feel they must be, they tend to become as inflexible as the most rigid J when someone seems to be threatening their lifestyle (although they usually respond with a classic SP rage which is yet another vivid contrast to their "dormant," impassive, detached mode). These territorial considerations are usually critical in relationships with ISTPs; communication also tends to be a key issue, since they generally express themselves non-verbally. When they do actually verbalize, ISTPs are masters of the one-liner, often showing flashes of humor in the most tense situations; this can result in their being seen as thick-skinned or tasteless.
    Like most SPs, ISTPs may have trouble with rote and abstract classroom learning, which tend not to be good measures of their actual intelligence. They tend, sometimes with good reason, to be highly skeptical of its practical value, and often gravitate towards classes in industrial arts; part-time vocational/ technical programs can be useful to even the college-bound ISTP. In terms of careers, mechanics and any of the skilled trades are traditional choices, and those ISTPs with strong numerical as well mechanical gifts tend to do extremely well in most areas of engineering. Working as paramedics or firefighters can fulfill the ISTP need to live on the edge; they are at their best in a crisis, where their natural disregard for rules and authority structures allows them to focus on and tackle the emergency at hand in the most effective way.
    ISTPs with more sedate careers usually take on high-risk avocations like racing, skydiving, and motorcycling. While aware of the dangers involved, they are so in touch with the physical world that they know they can get away with much smaller safety margins than other types.
     
     
     
    So there's much less in the T's than the F's when comparing them to myself... It's an interesting concept though. You can see me, timid and shy sometimes, whilst reckless and adventurous other times, with an interesting range of talents regarding both Thinking and Feeling techniques. But there's one thing in the Sensing types that stood out. A difficulty with organised education. It doesn't work for the 4 personality types. These 4 types are rarer than others, but they're the people who don't get good grades because it's not assesing them on what they do best. These 4 types seek adventure and experiences.
     
    So how do I satisfy this hunger for adventure whilst still being timid and shy? Games, duh! Finding new things, experiencing the failures and successes, all without having major impacts on my safety!
     
    TL;DR
    ...
    You need to read at least most of it to make sense of it... So I don't blame you if you didn't read this over 10000 character blog entry...
  19. Skye Starlight
    Does anyone else think so?
     
    I've been to 2 schools: A private school and a public school. However, they both had strict guidelines from the government on how to teach kids, and it involved standardisation
     
    Ah, good old fashioned standardised systems, making conformity essential.
    The other option? Having people learning at different rates, and organising them as such so that they can each excell! Asking them what they want to do and tailoring their education! Allow people to change their abitions and allowing people to return to school to do something else after they've graduated! Spending lots of money on it! Wait... Oh, yeah, that's why it's standardised. Because people are greedy and want all their money to themselves.
    Maybe we should make it that, once a person can work, they're supposed to get a job, the workload lessens and they have to pay for education. Maybe at a certain point in the studies this could occur!
     
    Or maybe we can be self taught and we only need to take aptitude tests to continue our studies... I mean, yeah, educators would be out of a job, but it could work!
     
    I have no idea what I'm on about. My next blog will be up soon! There I'll be talking about my personality type and how it's changed recently... And why I fit there! If you want to get ahead go check out here!
     
    http://mlpforums.com/topic/1970-mbti-personality-test/
  20. Skye Starlight
    Where was I? Ah yes... My life less than a year ago!
     
    So I was miserable! I had no connection to my friends, and I had no way of enjoying Ponies or Let's Players... Life has gotten better!
     
    I moved into an apartment, and although I have to share my room with my younger brother, there are at least places we can go to get away from each other... And I don't need to go outside if I need the bathroom...
     
    Unfortunately my old laptop broke, along with my younger brother's... Mine can still work, but we needed a keyboard, and a new screen... We already have a mouse... My old laptop is a hard-drive now... His laptop won't turn on though, so I have to share...
     
    I got a school one now too though, which I can use for certain things... Like hopping on here and visiting EQD!
     
    And I've decided on an "overall lifetime plan" Which is more or less a set of goals I want to complete...
    And I'm in senior year in high school too! Lot's of work, but it's kinda cool! Soon I will waddle off into the real world... And stop living in the fantasy world I seem to have created... Both a nightmare and an amazing adventure at the same time...
     
    So... Uh yeah, that's my life now! Working on my studies, reconnecting with the world, planning my life (which is nearly guaranteed to go wrong, with what I had planned before my life pulled me away...)
     
    So now you are up to date!
     
    Oh, and I've been falling sick lately... Don't know what it is, but I hope I get better! I can't really do my best if I'm sick...
  21. Skye Starlight
    Part 3, only being updated because I'm feeling sick and bored...
     
    Moving wasn't the hardest bit... I can still contact my friends, watch MLP, watch Let's Players, sleep in a decent bed in a solid building...
     
    Oh wait... For the next few months I had to live in a caravan, with no decent internet access... And I don't have a phone...
     
    Which basically meant I couldn't keep in touch...
    Anyone who knew me before I moved would have noticed my hiatus...
    And it wasnt' fun...
     
    You see, I have a younger brother, who is my exact opposite... Try sharing a caravan with the person who gets on your nerves the most...
    And I had no way of getting my normal entertainment fix. I became easily aggravated...
     
    And my new "friends" weren't that great either... Totally not my kind of friends, but I couldn't find anyone else to hang with...
     
    WORST MONTHS OF MY LIFE.
    Not an understatement...
     
    In there somewhere was a 2 week break from the caravan... I had the internet, I had my own room, I could finally get away from my brother... I could contact the outside world! And I found out when season 3 was to premier. MLP would return while I was in the caravan... And I couldn't realistically watch my Let's Players either...
     
    I didn't want to exist anymore... But I pressed on... I wanted to reach a better stage in my life...
    I had tasted true happiness, and I wanted it back...
     
    One more part, and I'll have finished the story of the last year of my life...
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