Do the Royal Guard suck as much as people think?

[Le Trotteur Sauvage 13,050]

They really looks useless... in the episode during the fight they are so useless they get kicked in two seconds !

[PonyOfWar 126]

8 minutes ago, PonyOfWar said:

I think the guards of the crystal empire are shown as a lot more competent. I remember thinking that very thought during the episode where Spike met thorax. They took orders very well and seemed to take their job and the threat seriously, some of them may have been a bit of a jerk but all in all they seemed a much better force then those in Canterlot. 

And maybe we can chalk it up to reasons mentioned. The crystal ponies were missing for the thousand years of peace, They Likely lived in conflict long before the empire disappeared. The Crystal ponies have likely seen real battle and conflict and as such are a lot more experienced. They seem tougher and far more serious.

While no one in Equestria had seen conflict in a thousand years the regular guards probably hadn't seen action until Luna returned and thus they are just now getting use to actual battle. No amount of training is going to live up to the real thing. Especially being trained by generations of ponies who equally have no battle experience.

Repost because no one ever sees the last post on a page :/ 

[Star Gear 18]

We bronies often like to make fun of the royal guard for being incompetent. They are pretty much our stormtroopers or imperial guardsmen. But while scripting my review for Parental Glidiance something came to my mind. Does the Royal Guard REALLY suck? I mean sure they where defeated many times, but that was always by extremely powerful creatures that needed to be defeated by extremely powerfull artefacts such as the elements of harmony or where attacked by an army large enough to surround an entire city and probably out numbered the royal guard by a large margin.  But then what is their point? Well equestria is filled with dangerous creatures and what stops them from just storming in and killing everypony. Heck we know ponyville has alarm sirens so they must serve a purpose. So the EUP would defend equestria from everyday threats while when a huge danger appears they call in the big guns (the princesses and mane 6). As for the Wonderbolts, well while they are part of the EUP they seem mainly focused on performance not combat. So I doubt they could take on a full grown dragon on their own. Also, you try catching a screaming unicorn falling at terminal velocity, I was surprised that Dashie cloud do it. So what do yo think?

[ManaMinori 4,145]

On 5/9/2017 at 2:46 PM, PonyOfWar said:

Repost because no one ever sees the last post on a page :/ 

I think Cadance might run a tighter ship as far as ensuring her ponies are safe. I mean, can you really blame her, when the empire you were tasked to rule over had been literally wiped off the map for a millenia? Plus, her husband is the captain of those guards, so yeah. And while is it important to note that by far, Equestria (or rather, to be specific, Ponyville) has had more attacks than the Crystal Empire up north has, I have noticed that we don't really see guards in Ponyville- only in the capitol, which is Canterlot, because two princesses, and militaristic beef to scare off invading intruders. Power in numbers....useless as they are when the big boss fights count. I would like to see guards posted in Ponyville, even if on a temporary basis, to deal with the smaller matters. Parasprited threaten to return? Don't worry, the guards got it. Chimera on the loose? Don't worry, the guards got it.

I would enjoy seeing Twilight and friends all prepared to save the day again, but they find out- nope. All is well. The guards are competent, and they can go on their friendship getaway. A day in the Life of the Ponyville guard could make for an interesting episode, if the Mane 6 aren't around to be heroes.

[MickeyAdaptus 2,211]

Hold on, did you made a reference to the imperial guard of Warhammer 40k O.o?

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But back to your point, I think they don't really suck but they are just not that well trained.

If I am going, to be honest, they are there more for tradition than as an actual military force.

When the changelings attacked Canterlot, they didn't even bother protecting anypony in the actual place where Chrysalis appeared.

The defence of canterlot was a rather big failure, not just because of their inexperience but because their actual captain was under mind control, so they would have to rely on the lower ranking officers during that time.

But if we are talking show wise, I think they are made like this just for the amusement, like during the episode *The times when you are a changeling* It was the first time we actually got to see the royal guard with actual emotions of this magnitude. But don't get me wrong, I absolutely loved the way how they acted, being mlp humour and all, but in terms of military experience, they are rather incompetent. But then again Celestia isn't much of a good leader either when it comes to such things.

[Star Gear 18]

Yeah you have a good point about training. And after all the most serous threat in the last 1000 years where probably wild animals which aren't that hard to take care of.  At the same time the attack on canterlot was done by an overwhelming force that had air superiority and took out thir leadership before the attack. So even if they where well trained they would have been overwhelmed. Heck the man 6 where overwhelmed by the changlings. After all the only time we got to saw the royal guard in open combat was in the crystal war, and they seemed to handle themselves there okay.

 

Also yeah that was a 40k reference. Wouldn't really consider myself a real 40k fan but I do really like the universe. Also  taking it a bit out of context and you have a species led by an imortal ruler, fighting off attacks by evil creatures and spirits of chaos, with an ineffective military where only a hand full can do actual damage. Sounds kinda familier. 

[Xeltor23 704]

1 hour ago, Star Gear said:

Yeah you have a good point about training. And after all the most serous threat in the last 1000 years where probably wild animals which aren't that hard to take care of.  At the same time the attack on canterlot was done by an overwhelming force that had air superiority and took out thir leadership before the attack. So even if they where well trained they would have been overwhelmed. Heck the man 6 where overwhelmed by the changlings. After all the only time we got to saw the royal guard in open combat was in the crystal war, and they seemed to handle themselves there okay.

 

Also yeah that was a 40k reference. Wouldn't really consider myself a real 40k fan but I do really like the universe. Also  taking it a bit out of context and you have a species led by an imortal ruler, fighting off attacks by evil creatures and spirits of chaos, with an ineffective military where only a hand full can do actual damage. Sounds kinda familier. 

Well, if you consider fighting like cats being ''handeling themselves", then yeah, they're okay.

I never took and probably won't ever these guards seriously; they're kind of incomptent, let's face it... first of all, I take what we see in the show as what would happen in the true universe, so when I see them (and Sombra's soldiers) fight like... cats, litterally, it's not because it's a kid's show, no, it's because that's what is hapening in the true MLP universe, and that's kind of... well, I'm gonna be quiet about that, even if their efficacity is debatable...

 

But another episode in which I understood that they're not a big deal is the one in which Rarity is a detective; I remember that they were distracted by a cake. A cake. That's the people who are supposed to protect the monarch; yeah, efficacity at its peak. Of course, they said their situation was "bad", but when you begin such a job, you're not supposed to be distracted by a cake.

 

And that's why I just can't take them seriously... the plot could be asking for it, but then, that universe is what we have as reference, and they're not that great in it.

[Star Gear 18]

6 minutes ago, Xeltor said:

I never took and probably won't ever these guards seriously; they're kind of incomptent, let's face it... first of all, I take what we see in the show as what would happen in the true universe, so when I see them (and Sombra's soldiers) fight like... cats, litterally, it's not because it's a kid's show, no, it's because that's what is hapening in the true MLP universe, and that's kind of... well, I'm gonna be quiet about that, even if their efficacity is debatable...

Well if you take the scenes so seriously then you have to remember that maud, according to calculations by commander firebrand, would have to be strong enough to punch strait through a human skull to break a rock the way she did. If the average pony is only half that strong then each hit could easily lead to heavy internal bleeding. I the show we might only see them lying on the ground in pain, but in reality they would be bleeding out internaly. Also cats kill each over when they fight.

15 minutes ago, Xeltor said:

But another episode in which I understood that they're not a big deal is the one in which Rarity is a detective; I remember that they were distracted by a cake. A cake. That's the people who are supposed to protect the monarch; yeah, efficacity at its peak. Of course, they said their situation was "bad", but when you begin such a job, you're not supposed to be distracted by a cake.

Spoiler

In the season 7 episode a flurry of emotions we see one of the royal guards that rarity interrogated and he seems to have been fired after the incident.

 

[Xeltor23 704]

1 hour ago, Star Gear said:

Well if you take the scenes so seriously then you have to remember that maud, according to calculations by commander firebrand, would have to be strong enough to punch strait through a human skull to break a rock the way she did. If the average pony is only half that strong then each hit could easily lead to heavy internal bleeding. I the show we might only see them lying on the ground in pain, but in reality they would be bleeding out internaly. Also cats kill each over when they fight.

  Reveal hidden contents

In the season 7 episode a flurry of emotions we see one of the royal guards that rarity interrogated and he seems to have been fired after the incident.

 

The thing is Maud was hitting rock with the point of her hooves, with a consecutive punching motion; I'm here talking about "kitten fight" notion, it's not the same hitting power at all; try taking a punch or fight a in a kitty way, that's not the same level of hitting power. Plus here they don't have claws.

Only one guard or not, the fact is that his mission was to protect the monarch's castle, and he was distracted so easily; I think that's worrying.

Edited May 22, 2017 by Xeltor

[Denim&Venöm 18,076]

@Star Gear

Dude, we kind of already have a topic on the matter. 

Sorry, I just hate repeating myself. 

[Star Gear 18]

27 minutes ago, Denim&Venom said:

@Star Gear

Dude, we kind of already have a topic on the matter. 

Sorry, I just hate repeating myself. 

Oh right, my fault, sorry about that. 

[blackstarraven 142]

The way I see it, The Royal Guard is more crowd control. Not really a Military Force.

[Star Gear 18]

37 minutes ago, Xeltor said:

The thing is Maud was hitting rock with the point of her hooves, with a consecutive punching motion; I'm here talking about "kitten fight" notion, it's not the same hitting power at all; try taking a punch or fight a in a kitty way, that's not the same level of hitting power. Plus here they don't have claws.

Only one guard or not, the fact is that his mission was to protect the monarch's castle, and he was distracted so easily; I think that's worrying.

Here are the calculations I was talking about showing just how strong ponies can be:

 Also I will admit that they did kinda screw up at canterlot, but in our history there have been worse screw us by rather competent militaries.

4 minutes ago, blackstarraven said:

The way I see it, The Royal Guard is more crowd control. Not really a Military Force.

From the cutie-remark we know that in war times they do act as a military. However in relative peace times this could be true.

[Xeltor23 704]

1 hour ago, Star Gear said:

Here are the calculations I was talking about showing just how strong ponies can be:

 Also I will admit that they did kinda screw up at canterlot, but in our history there have been worse screw us by rather competent militaries.

I never said that Maud wasn't OP in this scene; but the thing is, as I said, the gards weren't fighting in the same way Maud was punching that rock even if they're strong; if you fight a boxer in a true fight, you'll be destroyed, but if you fight the kitten way, the boxer will be as ridiculous.

Plus, here he's talking about Maud Pie, and only her, not "ponies" in general; did you see how all of the Mane 6 was like "WAIT WAT", that shows it's not common. I suppose that guards are as strong (at least I hope) though, so yeah; then it depends on how you're fighting.

 

Yeah, I agree that we weren't perfect in our history, but do you imagine a guard in the White House abandoning the US president's safety because he found a cake on the ground? Because that's what happenened with the guards.

Edited May 22, 2017 by Xeltor

[Daring_Do 552]

1 hour ago, Xeltor said:

Well, if you consider fighting like cats being ''handeling themselves", then yeah, they're okay.

I never took and probably won't ever these guards seriously; they're kind of incomptent, let's face it... first of all, I take what we see in the show as what would happen in the true universe, so when I see them (and Sombra's soldiers) fight like... cats, litterally, it's not because it's a kid's show, no, it's because that's what is hapening in the true MLP universe, and that's kind of... well, I'm gonna be quiet about that, even if their efficacity is debatable...

 

But another episode in which I understood that they're not a big deal is the one in which Rarity is a detective; I remember that they were distracted by a cake. A cake. That's the people who are supposed to protect the monarch; yeah, efficacity at its peak. Of course, they said their situation was "bad", but when you begin such a job, you're not supposed to be distracted by a cake.

 

And that's why I just can't take them seriously... the plot could be asking for it, but then, that universe is what we have as reference, and they're not that great in it.

That's how horses fight. Look it up.

[Xeltor23 704]

59 minutes ago, Daring_Do said:

That's how horses fight. Look it up.

"Ponies" here; and not necessarily . Look.

 

[Star Gear 18]

4 minutes ago, Xeltor said:

I never said that Maud wasn't OP in this scene; but the thing is, as I said, the gards weren't fighting in the same way Maud was punching that rock even if they're strong; if you fight a boxer in a true fight, you'll be destroyed, but if you fight the kitten way, the boxer will be as ridiculous.

 

Yeah, I agree that we weren't perfect in our history, but do you imagine a guard in the White House abandoning the US president's safety because he found a cake on the ground? Because that's what happenened with the guards.

The question is how much does the angle matter when fighting with a hoof since it isn't the same thing as when fighting with hands. I mean no matter what angle the blunt force is still there. 

 

And no I cannot imagine that. However I can imagine US soliders leaving a nuclear missile silo open and unlocked which was discovered by a person delivering Chinese food to said soldiers because that actually happend.

[Xeltor23 704]

59 minutes ago, Star Gear said:

The question is how much does the angle matter when fighting with a hoof since it isn't the same thing as when fighting with hands. I mean no matter what angle the blunt force is still there. 

 

And no I cannot imagine that. However I can imagine US soliders leaving a nuclear missile silo open and unlocked which was discovered by a person delivering Chinese food to said soldiers because that actually happend.

I agree, but I still think it's not the same force.

 

Well, that's incompetent as hell. Then, I never said humans are perfect;crazy fact: they're idiots. But ponies aren't geniuses either.

[Star Gear 18]

2 minutes ago, Xeltor said:

I agree, but I still think it's not the same force.

 

Well, that's incompetent as hell. Then, I never said humans are perfect;crazy fact: they're idiots. But ponies aren't geniuses either.

Oh I agree that it is not the same force. But I should have been enough force so that repeated hitting would cause fatal injuries or in the case of pegasi send them flying towards the ground.

 

And yeah ponies are pritty stupid. But not more stupid than humans.

[Xeltor23 704]

59 minutes ago, Star Gear said:

Oh I agree that it is not the same force. But I should have been enough force so that repeated hitting would cause fatal injuries or in the case of pegasi send them flying towards the ground.

 

And yeah ponies are pritty stupid. But not more stupid than humans.

That's understandble.

 

Yeah, but I think that they are more naive.

[Star Gear 18]

19 minutes ago, Xeltor said:

That's understandble.

 

Yeah, but I think that they are more naive.

Oh yeah I agree they are more naive.

[Xeltor23 704]

But I guess it's not the subject right?

[Star Gear 18]

1 minute ago, Xeltor said:

But I guess it's not the subject right?

Huh, oh right royal gaurd.

[Daring_Do 552]

45 minutes ago, Xeltor said:

"Ponies" here; and not necessarily . Look.

 

Sometimes the show uses realistic horse behavior/body language, sometimes it doesn't. "Shared breathing" (a horse behavior) seems to co-exist alongside human-style lip kissing; we see both in evidence in a recent episode.

[sweetolebob18 726]

As several others have pointed out, it is a standard trope that guards are incompetent, so the characters have to handle the problems the police can't deal with.