idea for a fanfic, opinions needed

[ParsoOfEquestria 1,490]

I'm typing up a fanfic as I'm posting this, however how does my idea sound to you? my story is going to be primarily a romance (I'm not used to writing this genre so it might be schoolboy standard)

anyway, to the point...

 

A regular human male gets killed and wakes up as a pony in equestria. the protagonist is oblivious to being human, and cannot remember anything about his past apart from who he is and life as a pony. along his path he develops a crush for Equestrian cellist, Octavia. during his dreams every night, he is haunted by a human, that looks and speaks like the protagonist, get killed. hoping to get to the bottom of why these dreams haunt him and confess his love for the mare he first met, the protagonist sets across Ponyville and Canterlot searching for answers

[SassyPony 9]

Oooh I really like it so far!

 

I have some ideas for the story:

• The protagonist could find himself in a situation where his memories return, and he'd have to make the decision whether to stay in Equestria or to go back to the human world. (His love for Octavia could influence his choice)
• The villain (whoever it may be; maybe use Nightmare Moon as a reference to your villain) could attempt on capturing/using him to get to the human world? Perhaps he is the "key"?
• His love interest, Octavia, could also be used as another key in the story (Maybe as a hostage? LOL)
• Maybe their "love" can resemble an Element of Harmony and that could be how they end up defeating the antagonist.

These are just some random ideas that have just popped up in my head.. They're probably not that useful...

 

BTW PM me when you've completed the story because I would LOVE to read it!

[Acoustic Cloud 2,202]

I'm typing up a fanfic as I'm posting this, however how does my idea sound to you? my story is going to be primarily a romance (I'm not used to writing this genre so it might be schoolboy standard)

anyway, to the point...

 

A regular human male gets killed and wakes up as a pony in equestria. the protagonist is oblivious to being human, and cannot remember anything about his past apart from who he is and life as a pony. along his path he develops a crush for Equestrian cellist, Octavia. during his dreams every night, he is haunted by a human, that looks and speaks like the protagonist, get killed. hoping to get to the bottom of why these dreams haunt him and confess his love for the mare he first met, the protagonist sets across Ponyville and Canterlot searching for answers

 

The only problem i see with this, is that it is the same story line to the Ted Dekker circle trilogy (black, red, white, green)

maybe read a synopsis on it?

[ceresbane 61]

I will be honest. Fimfiction will eat you alive with that.

 

Since this is your first romance. Let me give you the biggest tip.

 

If you are writing a romance, do not detract from the romance. It will not benefit your story have it full of subplots that aren't about the romance. It's such a common rookie mistake but truth be told, no one is gonna care about the character's past because in the end. It means nothing in the long run.

 

Guy with a past? Haunted by dreams?

 

throw those out of the window.

 

Focus on the present. The feelings. The hearts, The character growth and relationship development. What romantics want to read about is two ponies meeting and falling in love.

[ParsoOfEquestria 1,490]

I will be honest. Fimfiction will eat you alive with that.

 

Since this is your first romance. Let me give you the biggest tip.

 

If you are writing a romance, do not detract from the romance. It will not benefit your story have it full of subplots that aren't about the romance. It's such a common rookie mistake but truth be told, no one is gonna care about the character's past because in the end. It means nothing in the long run.

 

Guy with a past? Haunted by dreams?

 

throw those out of the window.

 

Focus on the present. The feelings. The hearts, The character growth and relationship development. What romantics want to read about is two ponies meeting and falling in love.

 

primarily a romance, it also contains a few other genres, but I take your word for it. even if it means i have to rewrite back up to four pages again