The username above you is the name of your new product. Try to advertise it.

[XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 777]

Hey there kids, tired of letting demons take over the world?

Having troubles with intergalactic overlords invading your beloved planet?

Tired of those pesky stains on the carpet whenever Tim comes over with the family?

BOY DO I HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU!

 

Introducing Gatekeeper Babylon! The world first, and only walking, talking flaming pony! Now I know what you're thinking, "Accellerant, what the hell is a glowing black pony doing on my lawn AND WHY is its head and tail on fire?" Well now, if I told you, it'd ruin the surprise, but what I can tell you is  that this baby will do it all!

 

Those pesky demons? Consumed!
Alien invasions? Devoured!!

Stain on the carpet? RAVAGED!!!!

Tim and His Family? BY FIRE BE PURGED!!!

 

This walking, talking trash compactor can do it all! What's that? You don't believe me? Well you better believe it brother, for this little guy's already eaten up half your neighborhood and he 'aint afraid to keep on going! BUY NOW OR I'LL BREAK YOUR LEGS! 

Edited May 14, 2013 by Accellerant

[Ganaram Inukshuk 3,682]

Are you tired of your party cannon not launching obnoxious confetti far enough? Then you need the Awesome Accelerant!!! Just one spray will let your ammo fly 700% farther!!!

 

Order now or I'm gonna fire your car across the Grand Canyon!!!

Edited May 14, 2013 by Derpy Cowbell

[~Master~ Button Mash 2,307]

Got a fever and the only cure is more cowbell? Why not completely obliterate that fever with not just more cowbell, but Derpy Cowbell. That's right, Derpy Cowbell is made of 100% muffinite ore, for a superior acoustic sound, at only a fraction of the weight of a standard cowbell, and a fraction of the cost.

 

Get your Derpy Cowbell today!

 

*obviously this is said in Christopher Walken's voice*

[Rocco 567]

CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP! SKIP ME AND DO ATOMIC BASS CANNON INSTEAD.

 

(KUDOS ON THE SNL/CHRISTOPHER WALKIN REFFERANCE ABC)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TO QUIET AT HOME?!?!?, BIRDS IN YOUR GARDEN EATIN YO VEGIES?!?!? LOUD SNORING MOTHER INLAW MOVED IN AND REFUSES TO LEAVE?!?! 

 

HI IM BILLY MAZE AND YOU NEED DERPY COWBELL! ITS THE ONLY COWBELL WITH THE PATENTED RINGING POWER OF DERP!

 

WITH JUST ONE RING OF THE PANTENTED DERPY COWBELL, ALL YOUR PROBLEMS WILL BE SOLVED 10 FOLD! 

 

JUST WATCH WHAT HAPPENS TO THIS HAMSTER WHEN WE RING DERPY COWBELL

 

 

 

 

 

SO BUY DERPY COW BELL TODAY! 

 

DERPY COWBELL IS NOT SAFE FOR HUMAN USE, PLEASE DONT USE ON INLAWS,PETS,CARS.POLICE OFFICERS,MALEMEN,OR SMALL CHILDREN

Edited May 14, 2013 by SKETCH

[stainesbrony 219]

Do you need a drawing?

Then use SKETCH, the only drawing tool that makes the stuff you draw to appear IRL. You can use it anywhere, and 10/10 dictators use it, and said that they'll spare me when they take over the world! Get SKETCH now!

 

(Disclaimer: stainesbrony inc. is not responsible for any legal issues caused by isung SKETCH. You used it, not us.)