Kill the User Above with the item to your left.

[LittleMac 3,085]

I kill you with grapes.

Are you like, allergic to grapes or something? XD

[Grepper 3,192]

I kill you by smashing my laptop over your head. I wish I made backups before this!

[LittleMac 3,085]

I beat you to death with my little brother XD

[Grepper 3,192]

Next, I misuse a chainsaw.

 

[Lord Bradley 1,319]

... Unlucky you. I just so happened to have a dull kitchen knife next to me. Ha, Heheh, hahahaha, hahahhahaHAHAHAHAH, MHUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! OH, HOW I WILL ENJOY OUR LITTLE PAIN SESSION! AND CONGRATULATIONS, YOUR GOING TO BE THE MAIN STAR! HHAHAHHAHAHAH!

 

 

...*Cough*... I need help.

Edited May 4, 2015 by Lord Bradley

[Grepper 3,192]

What is a chicken knife? That's what I thought it said at first.

*Presses button to launch attack drone at Lord Bradley.*

[Star Racer 198]

... Unlucky you. I just so happened to have a dull kitchen knife next to me. Ha, Heheh, hahahaha, hahahhahaHAHAHAHAH, MHUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! OH, HOW I WILL ENJOY OUR LITTLE PAIN SESSION! AND CONGRATULATIONS, YOUR GOING TO BE THE MAIN STAR! HHAHAHHAHAHAH!

 

 

...*Cough*... I need help.

Help with what? The game show? I can film it if ya want, if not i can be your assistant. I would enjoy being an assistant on a murderous game show....heehee

Ot:my sink with a broken...vanity? Yeah, vanity.

[Grepper 3,192]

I, er... bump one of the stage lights and it falls on you.

You are crushed.

Game Over. (0 points out of 300.)

[Star Racer 198]

Oh thats harsh.

You trip up the step that leads to my kitchen.

-5/99.2 points

[Grepper 3,192]

I'll copy some text from my favorite text-adventure game, dunnet.

 

Dead end
You are at a dead end of a dirt road.  The road goes to the east.
In the distance you can see that it will eventually fork off.  The
trees here are very tall royal palms, and they are spaced equidistant
from each other.
There is a shovel here.
>take shovel
Taken.  
>eat shovel
You forcefully shove a shovel down your throat, and start choking.

You are dead.
You have scored 0 out of a possible 90 points.

 

[Ziltoid the Omniscient 286]

*lodges a playstation controller down your throat*

[Grepper 3,192]

*chokes*

Punches you with my left hand. Hey, it's on my left!

[Star Racer 198]

In that case, *chokes you with left sock*

And yes, my socks have specific sides.

[Lord Bradley 1,319]

Well, i guess i could use a coffee mug to deliver some damage. Alright, fine. I will smash this cup against your head until i see a lot of red. Or green, if thats your style, i guess.

 

Side note: I hate Ninjas... Expect a much more brutal death, i'd say.

Edited May 5, 2015 by Lord Bradley

[Grepper 3,192]

Kills you with left shark.

Don't get the reference?

 

EDIT: My avatar is messing with you, Lord Bradley. It's an animated GIF!

Edited May 5, 2015 by MysteriousGrepper

[HunterTSN 1,444]

A rather large coffee mug or an empty Sprite can...

 

Actually I don't even drink Sprite so I have no idea where that came from.

[Star Racer 198]

Mirror

[Grepper 3,192]

I throw a pair of studio monitors at you.

[Lord Bradley 1,319]

Kills you with left shark.

Don't get the reference?

 

EDIT: My avatar is messing with you, Lord Bradley. It's an animated GIF!

I know, i figured that out. Thing is, it never changed when i look at it. The moment i take my eyes away, it decides to troll me.

 

OT: Uh, I'm gonna beat you with my coffee mug! Y-yeah, that's exactly what Im gonna do!... Let me get some more coffee first, i can feel the effects of my seventh mug running out.

[Grepper 3,192]

I throw an old craigslist listing at you. It somehow kills you.

[Kurael 43]

I don't have anything on my left but..

 

OTTOMAN SLAP TO DEATH!!!!

[Grepper 3,192]

I run into you with a shopping cart stolen from Walmart.

[SomeRegularReshiram 37]

Your going down! I've got a half full soda can!

[Grepper 3,192]

I bash you over the head with a douglas fir 2x4x8 piece of lumber.

[Catsle 604]

No my kinect, oh well (Bash to death)